9 Things I Hate About Everyone

[hArdyPUNKmArk]

9 Things I Hate About Everyone ​

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the T.V... remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3. When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too'. Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their arses!

5. When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6. People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'.... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8. When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbarse?

 

[Moon Knight]

Its dumbass, dumbarse sounds bad.

 

[Dave]

I agree with all of them but I do find myself asking some of the questions you posed.

 

[Moon Knight]

I agree with all of them but I do find myself asking some of the questions you posed.

I don't ask questions I make demands! I DEMAND YOU TELL ME THE TIME BITCH! Always add the word bitch, gives it a punch.

 

[Viola Moonlight]

MK: In Australia, it's arse or ass.

 

[Mantaur Rodeo Clown]

Despite the fact it seems copy pasted form an email, I'll say this.

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the T.V... remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

This annoys people? Who the fuck wants to change 14 channels manually, then swap back when its a shit show?

 

[Milkyway!]

9 Things I Hate About Everyone ​

CUNT!

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

I often do this as sign language. Because my 4th period teacher is an anal lord, and if she catches you speaking, you get a 15 minute detention.

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the T.V... remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

I don't refuse to manually change the channel. Its the fact that I've lost something, that I use daily. It frustrates me. So I simply look for it, until I give up and change the channel manually, and try again tomorrow, or find it.

3. When people say 'Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too'. Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

The only time I've ever heard this used, is when my ex took her shirt off, as a deal, and I touched. As she covered herself back up she said such a thing. I can understand your logic, but I certainly understand hers.

4. When people say 'it's always the last place you look'. Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their arses!

Agreed.

5. When people say while watching a film 'did you see that?'. No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

I've went to PLENTY of movies to make out with some gal, and not watch the movie. So I can understand this question too.

6. People who ask 'Can I ask you a question?'.... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

I usually say "Can I ask you 2 questions" >.>

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

Hahaha hasn't ever bothered me, but I see your logic.

8. When people say 'life is short'. What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

Religous people probably use this term the most, as nearly all religons believe in an after life, in which they live for eternity. 78 years is certainly a small number, compared to an eternity.

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks 'Has the bus come yet?'. If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbarse?

I've never rode a bus, wouldn't know.

I have 1 of my own. People who say I can't...It makes me mad. I have trouble doing a lot of things physically, but to say I can't is stupid. Because I've done things I've said I can't do before.

 

[Moon Knight]

MK: In Australia, it's arse or ass.

In America its always ass. Arse just doesn't sound as good to me.

 

[Jane]

This is the most stolen thing ever. I remember reading this like 3 years ago and many times since. PHONEY.

 

[Mr. Steve]

I don't ask questions I make demands! I DEMAND YOU TELL ME THE TIME BITCH! Always add the word bitch, gives it a punch.

lol only DIAR can pull this off. He's the fuckin' fist of Koonshu!

 

[The Dewbliners]

I too found this funny. When I saw Greg Fitzsimmons perform it at Go Banana's Comedy Club 4 FUCKIN' YEARS AGO!!!

 

[Lee]

The bus one makes sense, it;s either

A) to see if you'd just missed the bus.
B) If you've been there 1 minute and the bus was due 1 minute ago, it may be 1 minute late
C) They may want another bus that stops at the same stop, you may have seen it go by.

 

[Murfish]

To begin with, you didn't come up with this by yourself. If you have qualifiers, then it really isn't everyone that you hate. Is it?

 

[hArdyPUNKmArk]

Fucking hell guys lighten up.

I got it emailed to me at work, found it funny and thought I'd post it to share with my 'e-friends'. I never claimed I made them up.

I'm Australian, I will use arse over ass.

Also, you know when you're driving and looking for a house number that you haven't been to before? Why do you turn the music down? I mean, you're not going to hear the house number....

 

[Dr. Stinger A. Zoidberg]

lmfao at 1 and 5