klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Smackdown got a 1.8, down from last week.
Shannon Moore has been granted a release from TNA.
Monday Night Raw
Date: July 2, 2012
Location: Laredo Energy Arena
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
We're in the second half of the year now with Raw again. We have four MITB contestants so far and there's a rumor of a fifth showing up. I believe it'll be a former champion but it's hard to say given how this company keeps its stipulations straight. Lesnar is supposed to be here tonight too so we'll get more of him vs. HHH. This is one of those shows that is going to be used to build towards the PPV. Let's get to it.
After more technical difficulties, here's Cena to open things up. He talks about how last week was his crash course in MITB because you never know when someone is going to come and break things up. He'll win the case and the title and all the stuff you would expect him to say. Cue Bryan chanting YES. Cena: See? Even Bryan agrees with me. Bryan says he'll win the title at MITB so Cena won't be the next champion.
Cue Punk who says he disagrees with Bryan's claim that he'll win. He asks people if they disagree with Bryan, getting a lot of YES chants. For some reason only Cena has had theme music so far. Punk says that Bryan's ex-girlfriend will be counting the shoulders down, and then it's Punk vs. Cena all over again. Cue Jericho (with music) who says he's tired of people stealing his catchphrases. Bryan cuts him off and is told to shut up as only Jericho can say it.
Jericho welcomes us to Raw Is Jericho and says that after tonight no one will evvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvver be the same again. He says he'll win MITB and dares anyone to come out and say otherwise, and of course he's Kane. Kane says otherwise in something that made me chuckle. Cue Big Show and it's a big brawl. Kane beats on Jericho and Cena goes after Big Show while Bryan and Punk are both going to the floor. Kane goes after Big Show but Show knocks everyone down.
David Otunga/Cody Rhodes/Prime Time Players vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth/Christian/Santino Marella
Christiana nd Young start things off and a middle rope missile dropkick gets two for the Canadian. Off to Truth for his first action in months after a broken foot. Young tries a right hand but gets gyrated at instead. Off to Kofi who hits a middle rope shoulder for two. Boom Drop is broken up by Titus who pulls Darren to the floor. Kofi dives onto Titus but gets clotheslined down by Young as everything breaks down.
We take a break and come back with Cody holding Kofi in a surfboard. AW is mic'd up now for some reason. Titus comes in and slams Kofi for two. Kofi gets in a shot and it's off to Santino vs. Otunga. Santino hits that quick suplex and a Stunner for two. Everything breaks down again and the Prime Time Players walk off. Santino hits his usual and Cody walks out on Otunga. Cue Brodus Clay of all people as Santino loads up the Cobra. Otunga keeps trying to run but gets thrown into the Cobra for the pin at 6:24. Too short to rate given what we saw but this was organized chaos at its best.
Otunga takes a bunch of finishers post match and we get a big dance party.
Teddy (in charge tonight) is dancing in the back when Alberto and Ricardo come in. Alberto earned his one on one title match and he wants it by Jorge. The Board has said that Alberto gets his title match at MITB but tonight, Alberto has a surprise opponent.
Stephanie talks about her dad getting ready for the 99 Rumble. It was basically a Rocky parody mixed with a way to show off that Vince was in great shape.
Alberto Del Rio vs. ???
Cole talks about how the car was driven here from Alberto's home near Mexico City. That makes me wonder: how does he get these cars everywhere? Does he have a big fleet of people driving/transporting them all over the country? If so....that's kind of awesome. The fans GO OFF on Alberto with some Spanish swearing. Here's the opponent.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara
Think Cara is popular in south Texas? Cole calls Mexican wrestlers lucha libres. Mike Tenay he is not. Del Rio jumps Cara as he comes into the ring and goes insane on him. The bell hasn't rung yet. Del Rio destroys Cara on the floor and puts him in the armbreaker so Cara taps. There was no match.
Bryan is in the back and steals a flower from a random bouquet. He comes up to AJ and apologizes, even though AJ has Punk X's on his hands. She says that's sweet and of course has nothing to do with the title match at the PPV. Tonight she's going to win and run into the arms of her soul mate. She destroys the flower and leaves.
Heyman is live via satellite instead of Lesnar being here.
There's a 20 man battle royal tomorrow on Smackdown. The winner is next week's GM of Smackdown. Ok then.
After a recap of the Heyman/HHH challenge to Lesnar, we're told by Heyman that Brock will deliver his answer to HHH in person at the 1000th Raw. Lesnar wants to face HHH at Summerslam but not for the reasons people thing. HHH will do it because he needs money for the lawsuit. Also, it's his exit strategy for his career, because after this HHH will never be able to wrestle again. After Summerslam, he can be the executive that everyone says went down in a blaze of glory.
Kane vs. Big Show later on in a No DQ match. Heaven help me.
Vickie Guerrero/Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus/AJ
This looks odd on paper but when you think about it all of the connections are there. The guys start us off after Sheamus puts AJ on the apron. Dolph dropkicks him down but gets launched into the air soon thereafter. A running ax handle gets two for the champ but Dolph takes him down into a chinlock. Sheamus breaks that up and hits White Noise. He loads up the Brogue Kick but Dolph tags Vickie before it can hit. Sheamus kicks his head off to send him to the floor and AJ comes in. Shining Wizard kills Vickie at 3:27.
AJ does the YES chant and heads to the back. She finds Punk who is on the phone with his sister. He missed the match and AJ is crushed.
We get a video of Slater's destruction at the hands of old people, leading to this.
Heath Slater vs. Doink The Clown
This is basically a squash with Slater hitting his spinning sleeper mat slam (didn't that have a name?) for the pin at 1:20.
Post match, here's DDP to a BIG reaction and a Diamond Cutter.
Video on John Cena and Alicia Fox visiting sick/injured troops.
Kane vs. Big Show
This is No DQ. Show controls to start and sends Kane to the floor. He pulls Kane up from the floor BY HIS HEAD, onlyt o knocks Kane back to the floor again. Show misses a charge into the barricade but he throws Kane into the steps to take over. They fight over a chokeslam onto the announce table but Show superkicks him down instead. Show brings a chair in but walks into a DDT for two. The top rope clothesline misses but Kane grabs the chair. Show spears him down and chokeslams Kane onto the chair for the pin at 3:44.
Teddy runs into Eve in the back and she sucks up to him. Teddy gives her a nametag in a funny bit. She rips it up and runs into AJ, telling her to leave the mind games to the big girls and telling AJ to go sit in the corner and cry. AJ wants to know who Eve is going to brown nose next. Eve will do anything to get attention, so AJ says she'll show everyone how to do just that.
DX invading WCW was a big deal as well. This one actually was.
Tyson Kidd vs. Tensai
Tensai takes him into the corner and fires off the headbutts but misses a charge. Kidd rolls him up......AND GETS THE PIN AT 20 SECONDS???? WOW.
Tensai beats up Sakamoto post match.
Jericho and Bryan debate jackets and a catchphrase duel breaks out. YES vs. EVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVER is hilarious.
Punk tells Cena to follow his lead out there.
Tensai destroys Kidd in the locker room.
Chris Jericho/Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk/John Cena
Punk and Bryan start things off. They speed things up of course and Punk takes control. He sends Bryan into the corner and it's a double tag. Cena dominates Jericho as he is known to do, knocking him off the apron as we take a break. Back with Jericho getting two on Cena and taunting him for not being able to tag Punk. The Lionsault misses but Bryan breaks up the tag again.
The corner dropkick gets two for Bryan and it's off to Jericho again. The dueling chants begin but Jericho blocks the fisherman's suplex. The AA is countered into a DDT but Cena fires Jericho into the corner to put both guys down. There's the diving tag to Punk, who comes in with a springboard clothesline to take over on the fresh Bryan. Powerslam gets two and Bryan gets put in the Vice. Jericho FINALLY makes a save but Cena fights him up the aisle and into the back.
Punk and Bryan are the legal guys left, as well as the only two still in the ring. Bryan moonsaults out of the corner but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. Bryan starts firing off the kicks and a big one to the head gets two. Bryan goes up but gets superplexed down for another two. And here's AJ to skip around the ring. No one looks at her so she gets on the apron as Bryan fires off kicks to Punk.
No one looks at her still so she gets down as the guys hit cross bodies at the same time. AJ goes under the ring and pulls out....a table? She sets it up at ringside and very slowly climbs the steps. AJ goes up top but Bryan gets in front of the table. Punk gets up on the ropes to stop her as well, so she kisses him. Then she shoves him through Bryan through the table and starts a YES chant. The match ends at we'll say 17:30.
Results
Kofi Kingston/R-Truth/Santino Marella/Christian b. Prime Time Players/Cody Rhodes/David Otunga Cobra to Otunga
Sheamus/AJ b. Vickie Guerrero/Dolph Ziggler Shining Wizard to Guerrero
Big Show b. Kane Chokeslam onto a chair
Tyson Kidd b. Tensai Rollup
Daniel Bryan/Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk/John Cena went to a no contest
Tuesday
Raw got a 3.2, about the same as last week.
Smackdown
Date: July 3, 2012
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Booker T, Josh Matthews, Michael Cole
It's another live show here and in this case it's the Great American Bash. The main event tonight is a 20 man battle royal with the winner getting to be GM next week on Friday. That's up in the air and only offers a few interesting options, which means one of them is likely going to win. These shows are very hit and miss so hopefully this is the former of the two. Let's get to it.
We open in the back with a big party. There are girls in small outfits, Hornswoggle in the tub and Teddy in a Kiss the GM apron. Eve is going to be the cleaning lady tonight. Santino is brought forward to light the barbecue to officially start things off. Teddy and Santino back off from lighting it as Kane is here. He lights the fire for them in a cute bit.
Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is having guests that are going to keep me from seeing Dark Knight Rises for another week.
Cole says he's going to get inside AJ's head tonight.
Here's Del Rio to open the show. He's going to talk about himself, namely his match at MITB with Sheamus. Sheamus is going to be sent back to Ireland because he's just like all these people: a hooligan trying to take advantage of people like Del Rio. Alberto came here legally and is making money both here and in Mexico, unlike everyone here. He wants to send everyone here to the place where they belong, so he asks to see some people's papers. One guy doesn't have them so Alberto asks for security to take him out. The guy says this is Texas, not Arizona.
Cue Sheamus for the save and they brawl in the aisle. The champ throws Del Rio off the stage and into the barricade a few times. Ricardo keeps trying to help and eventually it allows Del Rio to kick Sheamus in the head. Ricardo opens the hood and Del Rio slams it down onto Sheamus' back over and over.
Post break we look at most of the attack all over again. Sheamus is taken out and has some blood coming down his head.
Great Khali/Layla vs. Aksana/Antonio Cesaro
This is punishment from Teddy because he's a sore loser. The guys start and it's time for a chop in the corner to Cesaro. Khali misses a big boot and Antonio takes him down in the corner. Khali throws him aruond some more and it's off to the girls. Layla isn't exactly Trish or Lita but she's by far the better in ring worker of the two here. Cesaro breaks up a cover and is thrown to the floor. Layout gets the pin at 1:45, and that means Layla pinned Aksana in case you can't figure out that LAYla uses the LAYout and you can't check the results below if you're not sure.
Cody brags about having another qualifying match later tonight but Teddy informs him that it's against Christian. Cody isn't happy.
Raw Moment: Foley wins the title. They spend about as much time talking about WCW spoiling it and 600,000 people changing the channel than about the title change itself.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cody Rhodes vs. Christian
Non-title. The idea is that Cody has never beaten Christian so he's in over his head here. Cody sends him to the apron and hits a Disaster Kick for two. Rhodes looks at the case a lot and we take a break. Back with Cody holding a hammerlock before hitting a release gordbuster for two. Christian comes back with a middle rope missile dropkick and gets fired up.
He slingshots to the floor and uppercuts Cody followed by a running seated dropkick. Top rope cross body gets two for the champ. Cody's Alabama Slam is countered into a sunset flip for two. He goes to unhook the buckle but Christian grabs him with a reverse DDT for two. The spear is countered but Cody misses the Disaster Kick. Killswitch is countered into the Cross Rhodes for the completely clean pin at 9:12.
Backstage Ryder starts a dance party after Slater is run off. Brodus takes center stage.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Dolph Ziggler vs. Alex Riley
Riley immediately hits a great dropkick for a fast two. Ziggler DDTs him down for a fast two and takes over. Riley makes a fast comeback with a clothesline in the corner and a spinebuster for two. The crowd continues to be into Riley which is interesting. Inverted DDT is countered but Ziggler's Stinger Splash misses, giving Riley a rollup for a close two. Zig Zag gets the pin at 2:28.
Cole is in the ring to interview AJ. That theme song of hers' is catchy. Cole says he's fair and balanced, unlike AJ who is clearly unbalanced. We get a long video recapping everything AJ did last night. Cole cuts her off and says AJ wasn't thinking. He calls her a teenager (she's 25) and asks if she's ever thought about pursuing a real man. One with power and influence and a former war correspondent who became the voice of the WWE.
Cue Bryan before this gets too weird. He calls Cole a sexist and says AJ didn't mean for him to go through a table last night. It was all a misunderstanding. Cue Punk who angrily throws Cole out. He says AJ did something last night that directly affected both Bryan and himself last night. Punk isn't going to pretend it didn't happen just because AJ is guest referee. She's not in a good place mentally and maybe some of that is Punk's fault. Punk says AJ needs professional help but Bryan cuts him off.
Bryan says that Punk is trying to be tricky because AJ is the guest referee. The only thing Punk cares about is having AJ as guest referee because he needs her to retain the title. AJ kisses Bryan for awhile and Punk shakes his head and leaves. She goes after him and kisses him too. Bryan looks stunned and Punk looks confused. AJ skips off and does a YES chant on the stage.
Santino Marella/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Hunico/Camacho/Drew McIntyre
Camacho and Slaughter start things off and it's quickly off to Santino. He gets in trouble in the evil dirty foreign corner and Drew pounds away a bit. A slam is countered and it's hot tag to Duggan. There's the Three Point Clothesline but everything breaks down. The ring is mostly cleared and the Cobra gets the pin on Hunico at 2:25.
Back to the party where Little Jimmy is jumping up and down. Sandow comes in and unplugs the cord. He says this isn't what our founding fathers fought for. Ryder gets in his face but Sandow has a speech ready. A fight breaks out with the people chanting Ryder. Zach gets the punch bowl but it goes onto Eve. Everyone laughs at her and it's time to keep dancing.
Hawkins and Reks both think they can beat Ryback but Hawkins won the coin toss and gets to face him.
Ryback vs. Curt Hawkins
Hawkins tries a sleeper but gets caught in the Over the Shoulder Boulder Holder. Ryback slams his head into the mat and hits an overhead choke suplex. Hawkins gets his head taken off by a clothesline and the Shell Shock gets the pin at 1:08.
Sheamus is out of the battle royal tonight.
Raw Moment: Vince Appreciation Night. Donald Trump made it rain money.
Here's Teddy to thank the fans for letting him be the GM this week.
Battle Royal
Alberto Del Rio, Kane, Jack Swagger, John Cena, Heath Slater, Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, Big Show, Great Khali, Brodus Clay, Damien Sandow, Tensai, Ezekiel Jackson, Justin Gabriel, Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, Zach Ryder, Santino Marella, Cody Rhodes, Christian
Only the big names get entrances as per usual. At the moment I'm probably missing some names but i'll fill them in as we go. Show throws out Justin and Brodus quickly. A bunch of people team up to throw out Khali. I'm missing one guy but I'm not sure if Sheamus was replaced or now. Ryder knocks out Sandow and Cody throws out Santino. Oh Christian is #20. Show shoves out Kofi and Cody as we take a break.
Back with ten guys to go as Bryan and Punk slug it out. Bryan stands in front of the ropes and Punk charges at him, eliminating both guys. Ok so we have Kane, Ziggler, Cena, Christian, Del Rio, Tensai, Ryder and Big Show to go. Big Show chokeslams Cena but Kane chokeslams Big Show. Tensai goes after Kane and pounds him into the corner. Cena erupts and beats up everyone before tossing Del Rio. Kane takes an AA but Tensai slows Cena down.
Christian and Ryder work on Big Show but that gets them nowhere. Cena dumps Tensai but Show dumps Cena immediately thereafter. So it's Big Show, Ryder, Christian, Ziggler and Kane. Show spears Ryder down and easily tosses out Christian to get us down to four. Ziggler puts Show in the sleeper but Kane kicks Show in the head to put them both out.
It's Ryder vs. Kane now which isn't the pairing I was expecting. Kane pounds him down but runs into the corner knees and the Broski Boot. Ryder tries the Rough Ryder because he's not that bright, but he escapes the chokeslams and low bridges Kane for the elimination and the win at 10:50.
Results
Layla/Great Khali b. Aksana/Antonio Cesaro Layout to Aksana
Cody Rhodes b. Christian Cross Rhodes
Dolph Ziggler b. Alex Riley Zig Zag
Santino Marella/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan b. Hunico/Camacho/Drew McIntyre Cobra to Hunico
Ryback b. Curt Hawkins Shell Shock
Zach Ryder won a battle royal last eliminating Kane
Wednesday
NXT
Date: July 4, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Jim Ross, Byron Saxton
Happy (day after) Independence Day for those of you in America. Happy Wednesday to those of you not in America. It's episode three of the new NXT and I'm actually looking forward to it. We've had two very good shows so far and we still have people that haven't debuted yet. Tonight we have the debut of Kassius Ohno (what names these people have). Let's get to it.
Sofia Cortez vs. Paige
Cortez is from Puerto Rico and Paige is from England. Both are good looking but they're not that great in the ring. Cortez (blonde) hooks a headscissors to take Paige (black hair) down and stomps away in the corner. Paige gets a boot up so Cortez enziguris her down. Cortez hooks an arm trap chinlock which Paige breaks free of pretty quickly. Sofia kicks her in the head and hits a sitout DDT (thing the move that Mysterio does where he jumps at his opponent and hooks his legs under their arms and lays out into a bulldog but with a DDT instead) for the pin at 2:27. Usual Divas stuff but Cortez's kicks weren't bad.
Seth Rollins vs. Camacho
Dang they don't waste time on this show. I love that. Ross says that WWE officials are high on Rollins. I've never heard that said on WWE TV before. Rollins starts out fast and hammers away before getting two off a rollup out of the corner. He pounds away again in the other corner but charges into a boot.
Camacho drops a leg (hermano) and chokes in the corner. A belly to back suplex gets two for Camacho but Rollins pulls himself up off the ropes and hits a standing enziguri. Seth hits a running dropkick but has to stop to take out Hunico. He rams them together and hits the Blackout for the pin (on Camacho just in case that's too complicated) for the pin at 4:33.
Hunico and Camacho jump Rollins post match and beat him down until Bo Dallas makes the save.
Corey Graves/Jake Carter vs. CJ Parker/Nick Rogers
Carter is Vader's son. Graves and Carter used to be FCW tag champions and may have been when this was taped. JR acknowledges Carter's heritage which surprises me a bit. Graves and Parker start us off but it's quickly off to Carter off a blind tag. Carter hits a quick splash in the corner and brings in Graves again. Graves hooks a neck crank but Parker hits a backdrop and it's off to Rogers vs. Carter. Carter picks Rogers up in a powerslam position and Graves slides in with a neckbreaker in a move called Bottoms Up for the pin at 2:25. Just a squash.
Video on Kassius Ohno.
Kassius Ohno vs. Mike Dalton
They trade wristlocks to start and Dalton takes him to the mat for two. Kassius (Chris Hero for those of you unfamiliar) hits a running clothesline in the corner and Dalton is in trouble. Off to a cobra clutch but Dalton escapes and hits a spinwheel kick for two. Ohno sends him into the ropes and hits the spinning forearm for the pin at 2:32. That's a good finisher but hopefully he gets some promo time to expand things beyond I knock people out.
Ohno says he knocks people out and when they hear Kassius coming, they say OH NO.
Bray Wyatt video with him talking about going through a lot and getting stronger as a result. Now he feels no fear or pain and he wonders what is going to happen when people realize they can't hurt him.
Derrick Bateman vs. Jinder Mahal
Mahal pounds away to start but Bateman throws him to the floor. He dives on Jinder to take over and they head back in. Mahal hits a neckbreaker on the top rope for two but a regular neckbreaker is countered into a backslide for two for Bateman. A small package gets the same as does a rollup. Bateman grabs a DDT and then a running flip neckbreaker for a close two. Jinder avoids the falling bulldog and hits a knee to the back and the camel clutch gets the submission at 4:02.
Seth Rollins/Bo Dallas/Tyson Kidd vs. Michael McGillicutty/Hunico/Camacho
That's a pretty fast turn around for a feud. McGillicutty and Dallas get us going but Kidd is tagged in before there's any contact. McGillicutty tags in Hunico rather than fight and now we get going. Regal and Chris Russo are on commentary now and get in a debate about Hunico's dew rag with JR. Hunico busts out a Gory Special but Kidd counters into a sunset flip for two. Off to Rollins who gets beaten down by the Mexican contingent and we take a break.
After hearing about DX invading WCW (the only WWE promo of the show so far) it's back with Camacho holding Rollins in a chinlock. Rollins quickly breaks it and makes the tag to Bo Dallas. He cleans a few rooms of the house but gets sent shoulder first into the post to stop his momentum dead. McGillicutty comes in who hooks a chinlock of his own. Off to Hunico who hits a butterfly backbreaker for two.
He keeps Dallas on the mat and brings McGillicutty back in. Another backbreaker gets another two but McGillicutty charges into a boot. There's the real hot tag to Kidd who comes in with a springboard dropkick for two. They head to the floor and Dallas dives on all three of his opponents. Kidd sets for a dive of his own but walks into the McGillicutter for the pin at 9:49 shown of 13:19.
Results
Sofia Cortez b. Paige Sitout DDT
Seth Rollins b. Camacho Blackout
Jake Carter/Corey Graves b. CJ Parker/Nick Rogers Bottoms Up to Rogers
Kassius Ohno b. Mike Dalton Spinning Forearm
Jinder Mahal b. Derrick Bateman Camel Clutch
Michael McGillicutty/Hunico/Camacho b. Tyson Kidd/Bo Dallas/Seth Rollins McGillicutter to Kidd
Smackdown got a 1.8, down from last week.
Shannon Moore has been granted a release from TNA.
Monday Night Raw
Date: July 2, 2012
Location: Laredo Energy Arena
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
We're in the second half of the year now with Raw again. We have four MITB contestants so far and there's a rumor of a fifth showing up. I believe it'll be a former champion but it's hard to say given how this company keeps its stipulations straight. Lesnar is supposed to be here tonight too so we'll get more of him vs. HHH. This is one of those shows that is going to be used to build towards the PPV. Let's get to it.
After more technical difficulties, here's Cena to open things up. He talks about how last week was his crash course in MITB because you never know when someone is going to come and break things up. He'll win the case and the title and all the stuff you would expect him to say. Cue Bryan chanting YES. Cena: See? Even Bryan agrees with me. Bryan says he'll win the title at MITB so Cena won't be the next champion.
Cue Punk who says he disagrees with Bryan's claim that he'll win. He asks people if they disagree with Bryan, getting a lot of YES chants. For some reason only Cena has had theme music so far. Punk says that Bryan's ex-girlfriend will be counting the shoulders down, and then it's Punk vs. Cena all over again. Cue Jericho (with music) who says he's tired of people stealing his catchphrases. Bryan cuts him off and is told to shut up as only Jericho can say it.
Jericho welcomes us to Raw Is Jericho and says that after tonight no one will evvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvver be the same again. He says he'll win MITB and dares anyone to come out and say otherwise, and of course he's Kane. Kane says otherwise in something that made me chuckle. Cue Big Show and it's a big brawl. Kane beats on Jericho and Cena goes after Big Show while Bryan and Punk are both going to the floor. Kane goes after Big Show but Show knocks everyone down.
David Otunga/Cody Rhodes/Prime Time Players vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth/Christian/Santino Marella
Christiana nd Young start things off and a middle rope missile dropkick gets two for the Canadian. Off to Truth for his first action in months after a broken foot. Young tries a right hand but gets gyrated at instead. Off to Kofi who hits a middle rope shoulder for two. Boom Drop is broken up by Titus who pulls Darren to the floor. Kofi dives onto Titus but gets clotheslined down by Young as everything breaks down.
We take a break and come back with Cody holding Kofi in a surfboard. AW is mic'd up now for some reason. Titus comes in and slams Kofi for two. Kofi gets in a shot and it's off to Santino vs. Otunga. Santino hits that quick suplex and a Stunner for two. Everything breaks down again and the Prime Time Players walk off. Santino hits his usual and Cody walks out on Otunga. Cue Brodus Clay of all people as Santino loads up the Cobra. Otunga keeps trying to run but gets thrown into the Cobra for the pin at 6:24. Too short to rate given what we saw but this was organized chaos at its best.
Otunga takes a bunch of finishers post match and we get a big dance party.
Teddy (in charge tonight) is dancing in the back when Alberto and Ricardo come in. Alberto earned his one on one title match and he wants it by Jorge. The Board has said that Alberto gets his title match at MITB but tonight, Alberto has a surprise opponent.
Stephanie talks about her dad getting ready for the 99 Rumble. It was basically a Rocky parody mixed with a way to show off that Vince was in great shape.
Alberto Del Rio vs. ???
Cole talks about how the car was driven here from Alberto's home near Mexico City. That makes me wonder: how does he get these cars everywhere? Does he have a big fleet of people driving/transporting them all over the country? If so....that's kind of awesome. The fans GO OFF on Alberto with some Spanish swearing. Here's the opponent.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Sin Cara
Think Cara is popular in south Texas? Cole calls Mexican wrestlers lucha libres. Mike Tenay he is not. Del Rio jumps Cara as he comes into the ring and goes insane on him. The bell hasn't rung yet. Del Rio destroys Cara on the floor and puts him in the armbreaker so Cara taps. There was no match.
Bryan is in the back and steals a flower from a random bouquet. He comes up to AJ and apologizes, even though AJ has Punk X's on his hands. She says that's sweet and of course has nothing to do with the title match at the PPV. Tonight she's going to win and run into the arms of her soul mate. She destroys the flower and leaves.
Heyman is live via satellite instead of Lesnar being here.
There's a 20 man battle royal tomorrow on Smackdown. The winner is next week's GM of Smackdown. Ok then.
After a recap of the Heyman/HHH challenge to Lesnar, we're told by Heyman that Brock will deliver his answer to HHH in person at the 1000th Raw. Lesnar wants to face HHH at Summerslam but not for the reasons people thing. HHH will do it because he needs money for the lawsuit. Also, it's his exit strategy for his career, because after this HHH will never be able to wrestle again. After Summerslam, he can be the executive that everyone says went down in a blaze of glory.
Kane vs. Big Show later on in a No DQ match. Heaven help me.
Vickie Guerrero/Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus/AJ
This looks odd on paper but when you think about it all of the connections are there. The guys start us off after Sheamus puts AJ on the apron. Dolph dropkicks him down but gets launched into the air soon thereafter. A running ax handle gets two for the champ but Dolph takes him down into a chinlock. Sheamus breaks that up and hits White Noise. He loads up the Brogue Kick but Dolph tags Vickie before it can hit. Sheamus kicks his head off to send him to the floor and AJ comes in. Shining Wizard kills Vickie at 3:27.
AJ does the YES chant and heads to the back. She finds Punk who is on the phone with his sister. He missed the match and AJ is crushed.
We get a video of Slater's destruction at the hands of old people, leading to this.
Heath Slater vs. Doink The Clown
This is basically a squash with Slater hitting his spinning sleeper mat slam (didn't that have a name?) for the pin at 1:20.
Post match, here's DDP to a BIG reaction and a Diamond Cutter.
Video on John Cena and Alicia Fox visiting sick/injured troops.
Kane vs. Big Show
This is No DQ. Show controls to start and sends Kane to the floor. He pulls Kane up from the floor BY HIS HEAD, onlyt o knocks Kane back to the floor again. Show misses a charge into the barricade but he throws Kane into the steps to take over. They fight over a chokeslam onto the announce table but Show superkicks him down instead. Show brings a chair in but walks into a DDT for two. The top rope clothesline misses but Kane grabs the chair. Show spears him down and chokeslams Kane onto the chair for the pin at 3:44.
Teddy runs into Eve in the back and she sucks up to him. Teddy gives her a nametag in a funny bit. She rips it up and runs into AJ, telling her to leave the mind games to the big girls and telling AJ to go sit in the corner and cry. AJ wants to know who Eve is going to brown nose next. Eve will do anything to get attention, so AJ says she'll show everyone how to do just that.
DX invading WCW was a big deal as well. This one actually was.
Tyson Kidd vs. Tensai
Tensai takes him into the corner and fires off the headbutts but misses a charge. Kidd rolls him up......AND GETS THE PIN AT 20 SECONDS???? WOW.
Tensai beats up Sakamoto post match.
Jericho and Bryan debate jackets and a catchphrase duel breaks out. YES vs. EVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVER is hilarious.
Punk tells Cena to follow his lead out there.
Tensai destroys Kidd in the locker room.
Chris Jericho/Daniel Bryan vs. CM Punk/John Cena
Punk and Bryan start things off. They speed things up of course and Punk takes control. He sends Bryan into the corner and it's a double tag. Cena dominates Jericho as he is known to do, knocking him off the apron as we take a break. Back with Jericho getting two on Cena and taunting him for not being able to tag Punk. The Lionsault misses but Bryan breaks up the tag again.
The corner dropkick gets two for Bryan and it's off to Jericho again. The dueling chants begin but Jericho blocks the fisherman's suplex. The AA is countered into a DDT but Cena fires Jericho into the corner to put both guys down. There's the diving tag to Punk, who comes in with a springboard clothesline to take over on the fresh Bryan. Powerslam gets two and Bryan gets put in the Vice. Jericho FINALLY makes a save but Cena fights him up the aisle and into the back.
Punk and Bryan are the legal guys left, as well as the only two still in the ring. Bryan moonsaults out of the corner but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. Bryan starts firing off the kicks and a big one to the head gets two. Bryan goes up but gets superplexed down for another two. And here's AJ to skip around the ring. No one looks at her so she gets on the apron as Bryan fires off kicks to Punk.
No one looks at her still so she gets down as the guys hit cross bodies at the same time. AJ goes under the ring and pulls out....a table? She sets it up at ringside and very slowly climbs the steps. AJ goes up top but Bryan gets in front of the table. Punk gets up on the ropes to stop her as well, so she kisses him. Then she shoves him through Bryan through the table and starts a YES chant. The match ends at we'll say 17:30.
Results
Kofi Kingston/R-Truth/Santino Marella/Christian b. Prime Time Players/Cody Rhodes/David Otunga Cobra to Otunga
Sheamus/AJ b. Vickie Guerrero/Dolph Ziggler Shining Wizard to Guerrero
Big Show b. Kane Chokeslam onto a chair
Tyson Kidd b. Tensai Rollup
Daniel Bryan/Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk/John Cena went to a no contest
Tuesday
Raw got a 3.2, about the same as last week.
Smackdown
Date: July 3, 2012
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Booker T, Josh Matthews, Michael Cole
It's another live show here and in this case it's the Great American Bash. The main event tonight is a 20 man battle royal with the winner getting to be GM next week on Friday. That's up in the air and only offers a few interesting options, which means one of them is likely going to win. These shows are very hit and miss so hopefully this is the former of the two. Let's get to it.
We open in the back with a big party. There are girls in small outfits, Hornswoggle in the tub and Teddy in a Kiss the GM apron. Eve is going to be the cleaning lady tonight. Santino is brought forward to light the barbecue to officially start things off. Teddy and Santino back off from lighting it as Kane is here. He lights the fire for them in a cute bit.
Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is having guests that are going to keep me from seeing Dark Knight Rises for another week.
Cole says he's going to get inside AJ's head tonight.
Here's Del Rio to open the show. He's going to talk about himself, namely his match at MITB with Sheamus. Sheamus is going to be sent back to Ireland because he's just like all these people: a hooligan trying to take advantage of people like Del Rio. Alberto came here legally and is making money both here and in Mexico, unlike everyone here. He wants to send everyone here to the place where they belong, so he asks to see some people's papers. One guy doesn't have them so Alberto asks for security to take him out. The guy says this is Texas, not Arizona.
Cue Sheamus for the save and they brawl in the aisle. The champ throws Del Rio off the stage and into the barricade a few times. Ricardo keeps trying to help and eventually it allows Del Rio to kick Sheamus in the head. Ricardo opens the hood and Del Rio slams it down onto Sheamus' back over and over.
Post break we look at most of the attack all over again. Sheamus is taken out and has some blood coming down his head.
Great Khali/Layla vs. Aksana/Antonio Cesaro
This is punishment from Teddy because he's a sore loser. The guys start and it's time for a chop in the corner to Cesaro. Khali misses a big boot and Antonio takes him down in the corner. Khali throws him aruond some more and it's off to the girls. Layla isn't exactly Trish or Lita but she's by far the better in ring worker of the two here. Cesaro breaks up a cover and is thrown to the floor. Layout gets the pin at 1:45, and that means Layla pinned Aksana in case you can't figure out that LAYla uses the LAYout and you can't check the results below if you're not sure.
Cody brags about having another qualifying match later tonight but Teddy informs him that it's against Christian. Cody isn't happy.
Raw Moment: Foley wins the title. They spend about as much time talking about WCW spoiling it and 600,000 people changing the channel than about the title change itself.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Cody Rhodes vs. Christian
Non-title. The idea is that Cody has never beaten Christian so he's in over his head here. Cody sends him to the apron and hits a Disaster Kick for two. Rhodes looks at the case a lot and we take a break. Back with Cody holding a hammerlock before hitting a release gordbuster for two. Christian comes back with a middle rope missile dropkick and gets fired up.
He slingshots to the floor and uppercuts Cody followed by a running seated dropkick. Top rope cross body gets two for the champ. Cody's Alabama Slam is countered into a sunset flip for two. He goes to unhook the buckle but Christian grabs him with a reverse DDT for two. The spear is countered but Cody misses the Disaster Kick. Killswitch is countered into the Cross Rhodes for the completely clean pin at 9:12.
Backstage Ryder starts a dance party after Slater is run off. Brodus takes center stage.
Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Dolph Ziggler vs. Alex Riley
Riley immediately hits a great dropkick for a fast two. Ziggler DDTs him down for a fast two and takes over. Riley makes a fast comeback with a clothesline in the corner and a spinebuster for two. The crowd continues to be into Riley which is interesting. Inverted DDT is countered but Ziggler's Stinger Splash misses, giving Riley a rollup for a close two. Zig Zag gets the pin at 2:28.
Cole is in the ring to interview AJ. That theme song of hers' is catchy. Cole says he's fair and balanced, unlike AJ who is clearly unbalanced. We get a long video recapping everything AJ did last night. Cole cuts her off and says AJ wasn't thinking. He calls her a teenager (she's 25) and asks if she's ever thought about pursuing a real man. One with power and influence and a former war correspondent who became the voice of the WWE.
Cue Bryan before this gets too weird. He calls Cole a sexist and says AJ didn't mean for him to go through a table last night. It was all a misunderstanding. Cue Punk who angrily throws Cole out. He says AJ did something last night that directly affected both Bryan and himself last night. Punk isn't going to pretend it didn't happen just because AJ is guest referee. She's not in a good place mentally and maybe some of that is Punk's fault. Punk says AJ needs professional help but Bryan cuts him off.
Bryan says that Punk is trying to be tricky because AJ is the guest referee. The only thing Punk cares about is having AJ as guest referee because he needs her to retain the title. AJ kisses Bryan for awhile and Punk shakes his head and leaves. She goes after him and kisses him too. Bryan looks stunned and Punk looks confused. AJ skips off and does a YES chant on the stage.
Santino Marella/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Hunico/Camacho/Drew McIntyre
Camacho and Slaughter start things off and it's quickly off to Santino. He gets in trouble in the evil dirty foreign corner and Drew pounds away a bit. A slam is countered and it's hot tag to Duggan. There's the Three Point Clothesline but everything breaks down. The ring is mostly cleared and the Cobra gets the pin on Hunico at 2:25.
Back to the party where Little Jimmy is jumping up and down. Sandow comes in and unplugs the cord. He says this isn't what our founding fathers fought for. Ryder gets in his face but Sandow has a speech ready. A fight breaks out with the people chanting Ryder. Zach gets the punch bowl but it goes onto Eve. Everyone laughs at her and it's time to keep dancing.
Hawkins and Reks both think they can beat Ryback but Hawkins won the coin toss and gets to face him.
Ryback vs. Curt Hawkins
Hawkins tries a sleeper but gets caught in the Over the Shoulder Boulder Holder. Ryback slams his head into the mat and hits an overhead choke suplex. Hawkins gets his head taken off by a clothesline and the Shell Shock gets the pin at 1:08.
Sheamus is out of the battle royal tonight.
Raw Moment: Vince Appreciation Night. Donald Trump made it rain money.
Here's Teddy to thank the fans for letting him be the GM this week.
Battle Royal
Alberto Del Rio, Kane, Jack Swagger, John Cena, Heath Slater, Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, Big Show, Great Khali, Brodus Clay, Damien Sandow, Tensai, Ezekiel Jackson, Justin Gabriel, Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, Zach Ryder, Santino Marella, Cody Rhodes, Christian
Only the big names get entrances as per usual. At the moment I'm probably missing some names but i'll fill them in as we go. Show throws out Justin and Brodus quickly. A bunch of people team up to throw out Khali. I'm missing one guy but I'm not sure if Sheamus was replaced or now. Ryder knocks out Sandow and Cody throws out Santino. Oh Christian is #20. Show shoves out Kofi and Cody as we take a break.
Back with ten guys to go as Bryan and Punk slug it out. Bryan stands in front of the ropes and Punk charges at him, eliminating both guys. Ok so we have Kane, Ziggler, Cena, Christian, Del Rio, Tensai, Ryder and Big Show to go. Big Show chokeslams Cena but Kane chokeslams Big Show. Tensai goes after Kane and pounds him into the corner. Cena erupts and beats up everyone before tossing Del Rio. Kane takes an AA but Tensai slows Cena down.
Christian and Ryder work on Big Show but that gets them nowhere. Cena dumps Tensai but Show dumps Cena immediately thereafter. So it's Big Show, Ryder, Christian, Ziggler and Kane. Show spears Ryder down and easily tosses out Christian to get us down to four. Ziggler puts Show in the sleeper but Kane kicks Show in the head to put them both out.
It's Ryder vs. Kane now which isn't the pairing I was expecting. Kane pounds him down but runs into the corner knees and the Broski Boot. Ryder tries the Rough Ryder because he's not that bright, but he escapes the chokeslams and low bridges Kane for the elimination and the win at 10:50.
Results
Layla/Great Khali b. Aksana/Antonio Cesaro Layout to Aksana
Cody Rhodes b. Christian Cross Rhodes
Dolph Ziggler b. Alex Riley Zig Zag
Santino Marella/Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan b. Hunico/Camacho/Drew McIntyre Cobra to Hunico
Ryback b. Curt Hawkins Shell Shock
Zach Ryder won a battle royal last eliminating Kane
Wednesday
NXT
Date: July 4, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Jim Ross, Byron Saxton
Happy (day after) Independence Day for those of you in America. Happy Wednesday to those of you not in America. It's episode three of the new NXT and I'm actually looking forward to it. We've had two very good shows so far and we still have people that haven't debuted yet. Tonight we have the debut of Kassius Ohno (what names these people have). Let's get to it.
Sofia Cortez vs. Paige
Cortez is from Puerto Rico and Paige is from England. Both are good looking but they're not that great in the ring. Cortez (blonde) hooks a headscissors to take Paige (black hair) down and stomps away in the corner. Paige gets a boot up so Cortez enziguris her down. Cortez hooks an arm trap chinlock which Paige breaks free of pretty quickly. Sofia kicks her in the head and hits a sitout DDT (thing the move that Mysterio does where he jumps at his opponent and hooks his legs under their arms and lays out into a bulldog but with a DDT instead) for the pin at 2:27. Usual Divas stuff but Cortez's kicks weren't bad.
Seth Rollins vs. Camacho
Dang they don't waste time on this show. I love that. Ross says that WWE officials are high on Rollins. I've never heard that said on WWE TV before. Rollins starts out fast and hammers away before getting two off a rollup out of the corner. He pounds away again in the other corner but charges into a boot.
Camacho drops a leg (hermano) and chokes in the corner. A belly to back suplex gets two for Camacho but Rollins pulls himself up off the ropes and hits a standing enziguri. Seth hits a running dropkick but has to stop to take out Hunico. He rams them together and hits the Blackout for the pin (on Camacho just in case that's too complicated) for the pin at 4:33.
Hunico and Camacho jump Rollins post match and beat him down until Bo Dallas makes the save.
Corey Graves/Jake Carter vs. CJ Parker/Nick Rogers
Carter is Vader's son. Graves and Carter used to be FCW tag champions and may have been when this was taped. JR acknowledges Carter's heritage which surprises me a bit. Graves and Parker start us off but it's quickly off to Carter off a blind tag. Carter hits a quick splash in the corner and brings in Graves again. Graves hooks a neck crank but Parker hits a backdrop and it's off to Rogers vs. Carter. Carter picks Rogers up in a powerslam position and Graves slides in with a neckbreaker in a move called Bottoms Up for the pin at 2:25. Just a squash.
Video on Kassius Ohno.
Kassius Ohno vs. Mike Dalton
They trade wristlocks to start and Dalton takes him to the mat for two. Kassius (Chris Hero for those of you unfamiliar) hits a running clothesline in the corner and Dalton is in trouble. Off to a cobra clutch but Dalton escapes and hits a spinwheel kick for two. Ohno sends him into the ropes and hits the spinning forearm for the pin at 2:32. That's a good finisher but hopefully he gets some promo time to expand things beyond I knock people out.
Ohno says he knocks people out and when they hear Kassius coming, they say OH NO.
Bray Wyatt video with him talking about going through a lot and getting stronger as a result. Now he feels no fear or pain and he wonders what is going to happen when people realize they can't hurt him.
Derrick Bateman vs. Jinder Mahal
Mahal pounds away to start but Bateman throws him to the floor. He dives on Jinder to take over and they head back in. Mahal hits a neckbreaker on the top rope for two but a regular neckbreaker is countered into a backslide for two for Bateman. A small package gets the same as does a rollup. Bateman grabs a DDT and then a running flip neckbreaker for a close two. Jinder avoids the falling bulldog and hits a knee to the back and the camel clutch gets the submission at 4:02.
Seth Rollins/Bo Dallas/Tyson Kidd vs. Michael McGillicutty/Hunico/Camacho
That's a pretty fast turn around for a feud. McGillicutty and Dallas get us going but Kidd is tagged in before there's any contact. McGillicutty tags in Hunico rather than fight and now we get going. Regal and Chris Russo are on commentary now and get in a debate about Hunico's dew rag with JR. Hunico busts out a Gory Special but Kidd counters into a sunset flip for two. Off to Rollins who gets beaten down by the Mexican contingent and we take a break.
After hearing about DX invading WCW (the only WWE promo of the show so far) it's back with Camacho holding Rollins in a chinlock. Rollins quickly breaks it and makes the tag to Bo Dallas. He cleans a few rooms of the house but gets sent shoulder first into the post to stop his momentum dead. McGillicutty comes in who hooks a chinlock of his own. Off to Hunico who hits a butterfly backbreaker for two.
He keeps Dallas on the mat and brings McGillicutty back in. Another backbreaker gets another two but McGillicutty charges into a boot. There's the real hot tag to Kidd who comes in with a springboard dropkick for two. They head to the floor and Dallas dives on all three of his opponents. Kidd sets for a dive of his own but walks into the McGillicutter for the pin at 9:49 shown of 13:19.
Results
Sofia Cortez b. Paige Sitout DDT
Seth Rollins b. Camacho Blackout
Jake Carter/Corey Graves b. CJ Parker/Nick Rogers Bottoms Up to Rogers
Kassius Ohno b. Mike Dalton Spinning Forearm
Jinder Mahal b. Derrick Bateman Camel Clutch
Michael McGillicutty/Hunico/Camacho b. Tyson Kidd/Bo Dallas/Seth Rollins McGillicutter to Kidd