Your Worst Date

[LSN80]

We've all had them. Whether it was someone we met online, someone we thought we knew as a friend, a random meeting where there seemed to be chemistry, or being set up by friends, we've all likely experienced a date that didn't exaclty go as plans. For some, the aftermath of said date changes the way we date going forward, sees us becoming more selective, and even looking harder for "signals" in future dates. I had such an experience in 2005 before I met my wife that is so unbelievable that I can't believe it happened myself at times.

I was in my final year of graduate school, and was interning at a school doing Behavioral Support Consulting 3 days a week. During my 4 months there, I bumped into a teacher at least once a week who was around my age. We flirted every week and I also liked how personable and sweet she came across, along with how attractive I found her to be. I considered her to be well out of my league, so I never bothered asking her out. About two weeks before school ended, she instead asked me out, telling me she was tired of waiting on me to ask. I blushingly said yes, and we agreed to go out the weekend after I graduated.

We went to a nice Sushi restaurant, and we were planning to go to Dave and Busters afterwards. After we left the restaurant, she decided she wanted to go drinking and dancing instead. But first, we went back to her place where she and her roomate drank an entire bottle of Smirnoff Vodka while her roommate's boyfriend and I talked about the girls. We then went went to Matrix, one of the bigger clubs in Pittsburgh. She was already drunk before we got there, and was all over the place emotion-wise. She fluctuated from being angry at me one minute, to threatening to hurt another girl who tried to dance with me, to dragging me into a restroom for a quickee. This night also saw her talk about how "independant" she was, and five minutes later demanding I take money out of the ATM so she could buy drinks. The night at the club ended with the rousing memory of her crying in the corner at the end of the night, over memories of being raped in the past. Unfortunately, the real craziness started after we got into the taxi after the night was over.

It was quite a drive out of the place, and she asked me to hold her. At this point, I wasn't about to argue, not wanting more drama. But 5 minutes later, she was screaming "Get Off Me", so I quickly released her and cringed in my corner of the taxi as she told me she had been raped 12 times, and how alcohol always brought back these memories. I wanted to ask her "Then why the hell do you drink?", and then she revealed she knew 7 of the men who raped her. She then informed me with the 7 she knew, she visited their residences shortly after being raped, voluntarily sleeping with them in order to regain her power. I was thanking God at this point that it was a long ride, as I was starting to sober up, and planned to bolt as soon as I got back to my car.

As was the case with the rest of the night, that didn't go as planned either.
As soon as we got back to her place, she just took off running into nearby Sewickly Park, which is dangerous in the day, let alone night. I was in a frame of mind of absolute disbelief and had a "not my problem" attitude. Unfortunately, her roommate was cute as well(her boyfriend had already left) and she persuaded me to help search for her in the park. We eventually located her, where she had somehow climbed a 25 foot wall and was threatening to jump if I didn't get her down. Her roomate went rushing up, but she insisted it was I that came to get her. I was freaked beyond words at this time, but I was able to talk her down. I pretended to sprain my ankle on my way down just to divert her attention from how crazy she was acting to someone else's needs. She babied me all the way back to her place, and I let her ice my "injured ankle for 15 minutes before saying I was ready to take off. That didn't work out well either, Instead, she demanded I stay the night with her, so she could further take care of my "injured" ankle. I said I need to leave, which prompted her to destroy two large paintings in her place. Scared of what else she'ld do, I agreed and told her I was tired, hurting, and just wanted to go to sleep. I fell asleep readily but two hours later she woke me up, had gotten on top of me and was trying to, well, you know.

Remembering she had alledged she had been raped 12 times, I wasn't about to be accused #13, so I told her my ankle hurt too badly to have sex with her. As soon as I woke up and assured she was still sleeping, I bolted and never looked back. Fortunately, she only called me a few times, and after I ignored each one, she took the hint and stopped calling. I'm just thankful she didn't know where I lives.

I learned a few things about myself from that night. I played therapist 24/7, sometimes to my own detriment. Instead of doing the smart thing and getting the hell out of there, I wanted to "help" a woman that was clearly all over the place, and I had no idea what she was capable of. My poor judgment put me in several vulnerable at best situations that night. I also stopped drinking on a first date, even if it was just one. I wanted to get to know someone sober, as it gave me a clearer mind to evaluate if things were going well. And I raised my standards on who I would go out with. I made sure that I got to know someone as friends first, as I did with my wife. There's just too many variables Ive found I can't account for if I jump into something physical or a relationship right away. So something slightly good came out of a terrible evening.

What was your worst date like? What circumstances made it so poor?

Did you change anything about the way you dated, such as standards or expectations following said poor date?

Did you learn anything about yourself from the date? If yes, what?

 

[Dagger Dias]

My worst date was back in 2004 with a really strange and rude girl. I was 17 and still relatively new to the dating scene. I met up with this girl at the mall in Waco. She came with a couple of friends of hers who walked around with us first. Then they left. We went to eat at the food court and the strangest thing happened. I got us a pizza and she refused to eat anything. I told her she should have some so that I do not feel rude eating the whole thing. She told me that she refuses to eat if anyone else is around. Wow.... Ok.... I said as I rolled my eyes and kept eating.

Guys this next part is really important. Learn from my mistake. My next question was how many other guys she has dated. Huge mistake! Don't ever talk about that on a first date. All it does is cause drama or make akward conversations. Turns out she had more experience than me. She asked me the same question. I was still a virgin at the time and had not had a serious relationship last beyond a month yet. Her response was that she thought I was "too good for her".

After that we walked around some more and had more random discussions. Porn eventually got brought up. I told her that I have never watched any, nor do I have the intention of ever doing so. She looked at me as if I was from another planet. We kept walking after that. We passed Hibbett Sports and I told her we should go in there and look around since it's one of my favorite stores. She looked at me and said "What? People like you don't generally like that kind of store". I asled her what she meant by that. Her response was what sealed the deal. "Well you don't have sex and you won't drink, smoke, do drugs, or watch porn, aren't you gay?". I looked at her for about five seconds before I walked away, never to see her again.

That was by far the worst date I have ever been on. She was far too weird and treated me incredibly rudely. That caused me to have high standards with the women I date. I learned the hard way to NOT bring up past relationships on a first date. I also learned that it is ok to be a little picky with who you date. The whole point of dating is to help you pick out who you spend the rest of your life with. Had it not been for that awful date, I would not have had high standards, and I would probably not be married now. I learned that I wanted someone who respected me. Someone who shared the same values as me. Someone who could put up with my fanboyism of WWE and Nintendo. Someone worth saving sex for.

Single men of the world.... It's ok to be picky. Your princess is out there. Don't settle for anyone less than the one you fall in love with. Bad dates happen to everyone, just as bad relationships do. Hang in there and don't ever let a bad date get you down. I look back on that story now and laugh at how stupid she was rather than being angry about it. Some day you will all be able to look back on it without feeling bad too.

 

[This Is My Name Thank You]

In all honesty I never really had a "date" before I dated the girl I like. I am not sure if that makes any sense or not. I can say I had an official date with a girl before we dated. I had gone out to eat with them and what not but I don't know if that counts. I can't even consider I even had a good relationship. It’s a wonder what bad habits do to a person and how they clog your mind and when your only true thing in common with them is smoking weed, drinking an occasional pills, then your doomed from the start. I am a shy guy, never popular but had a few girls like me. I am not sure if I am meant to be with anyone or not. Every girl I have seen in Florida is taken or has kids. Sure I don't mind dating a woman with a child but I can't even get a date.

I think about it now as I wish I could reply with a terrible/bad date story but I don't have one. I have had horrible relationships and been treated like shit that honestly I don't think I should date. Ehh I guess it is what it is lol

 

[Trill Co$by]

Interesting topic... personally, I've had the misfortune of being cursed with "Date number 4 is a war" virus from who knows where and every single time the "fourth date" rolls around, there's something hectic... Idk why people think 3 dates means anything, I really don't. But yeah of the million fourth dates that I've had, I can really think of 1 that stand out as being equally the worst dates I've ever had... sure, I was at a young age, but still they were just terrible.

My worst date was when I was 14... yeah a little young to be "dating" or whatever but yeah there I was and the girl was like 15 or 16. I don't remember. All I do remember is that she was two grades ahead of me and we had the same birthday. So anyway here I am on my first ever fourth date with my *count break* 5th girlfriend but I guess second "real" girlfriend and the two of us decided that instead of going to the school skate night, we were going to bring my two friends and her two friends, and we were going to go bowling instead.

In the beginning of the date, everything was perfect. She and I were even snuggling up to each other between our turns up to bowl, and our friends were all getting along. Then time comes and 9pm rolls around. Keep in mind, I'm 14 and still have a curfew (both by my mom and the law) and time for said curfew was creeping in fast. What she decides to do, for some moronic reason, is to stay and play one more game but this time she wanted to try and get some of the college guys a few lanes down to get alcoholic drinks. Now keep in mind, I've never EVER touched alcohol, tobacco, or anything in my life and never saw a point in doing so... so obviously, I was resenting the drinks and was trying not to get her to do it either. She says "It's okay, my mom allows me to drink all the time." and I was like okay just stay cool. I know, I was young and stupid (common teenage trait).

So she's able to convince the guys to get her and one of her friends some beer while the rest of us decided that we weren't going to be involved in whatever happened from there. With her being who she was, she seemed very relaxed and was able to actually hold her liquor I guess you'd say... until we had to leave the bowling alley. As we're walking out of the bowling alley, we just barely clear the bottom step before she doubles over and throws up right on my brand new Air Force Ones... keep in mind, they were in style back then and very expensive. So of course, that pretty much was a bummer but I was willing to let it go until she started to talk and as she was doing so, she again threw up... this time, my face was the victim of her vomit. So there I am with vomit on my face when finally her mother comes by to pick her up.

Her mother gets out of the car and sees that her daughter is drunk, sick, and out of her mind... and of course, as always, she doesn't bother making her daughter the responsible one for her being drunk and whatnot, but begins to cuss me out in front of my friends, her friends, and even a few people leaving and entering the bowling alley. Being 14 and raised right, I took as much belittling as I could before I turned and walked away with my two friends... It wasn't until an hour later when my mom came to pick me up and I had to tell her everything that happened. She of course, being my mom and all, told me that she was right about the girl I was dating and that because she was right, she was holding me responsible since I wasn't "man enough" to stop her from drinking in the first place.

Fortunately though, no cops were called.

 

[Mustang Sally]

My stupid roommate set me up on a blind date in college (actually, my date wasn't blind; he could see quite well).

He took me to Pepe's Pizza, a famous brick-oven pizza restaurant, open since 1925. The place is so popular that there's a two-hour wait on weekend nights.

As we stood in the pleasant October air along with a hundred other people, he started in with the complaints. I don't enjoy the "f" word, but I'll use it as this guy did.


"Why is it so fuckin' cold out tonight?"

"How long is the fuckin' wait gonna be, anyhow?"

"What's the fuckin' deal, Sally? Why didn't you fuckin' tell me we were gonna have to wait this long?"

(To the guy next to him) "Watch where you're fuckin' walkin', shithead. Don't make me punch you out."



Once in the restaurant, you sit at old-fashioned tables and are served by nasty waitresses. Apparently, they're as big a part of Pepe's tradition as the pizza. This guy gets in an argument with ours:


HIM: "What do you mean you got clam pizza? Who the fuck orders clams on pizza?"

HER: "If you don't want clams, order something else."

HIM: "Well, are the clams fresh?"

HER: "How do I know if they're fresh? Yeah, I guess so."

HIM: "Well, when were they caught?"

HER: "They don't catch clams, you jerk."

HIM:" Who are you callin' a jerk, bitch?"

He threw his soda glass against the wall, smashing it. The waitress threatened to call the police, so he got up to leave. I got up with him and he asked me where the fuck I was going? I told him I figured we were leaving, no? He told me that I didn't defend him with the waitress, so I could call a taxi and get home by myself.

He walked out.....and I called a taxi and went home by myself.

 

[The Dragon Saga]

Guys this next part is really important. Learn from my mistake. My next question was how many other guys she has dated. Huge mistake! Don't ever talk about that on a first date. All it does is cause drama or make akward conversations.

This is basically how me and my last girlfriend broke up. In the Cinema it randomly came up, her ex-boyfriends, or just other lads she'd been with. I knew a couple, but she hadn't been with all that many. The difference with me is I became paranoid, went onto her Facebook and one of her friends had posted something on one of the guys she mentioned walls in-relation to the girl I was seeing. Turns out, when I approached her about, she didn't like what I thought and it ended. Huh, listen to Dagger.

I haven't been on many awful dates. One which sticks out in my mind is when I was 14 and in second year. I met a girl who was a year ahead of me and 16, she was hot so I refrained from saying my age and I didn't make light of it either. We texted and spoke on the phone for awhile before meeting up.

For one, in-fairness, I was dressed oddly. My clothes had been dried incorrectly by my mother and the clothes I had to choose from were shit, so I blame myself for my appearence. I have always had awful hair, not style, just the way it is. If I don't gel it, it looks like I have a fuzzy afro and if I do gel it, it can come out looking odd at times. I've learned what to do with it, but I didn't look the best.

Second, I was about 5'10" at the time and she was still taller than me. There wasn't much of a height difference, she looked older as well, like just in appearence. We didn't talk all that much, I tried. Then we went to see some awful movie I can't even remember the name of and didn't even talk through the movie, by the time it had ended I just wanted out of there. I didn't know if it was me or her, I'd been with older girls before this and had normal times, but this was awkward and shit.

So, when the film ended I made up some excuse and hit the road. She did contact me after though, tried to meet up again but I was reluctant so I stayed away. Have never seen her since and I don't add her on Facebook or anything. Was just an awkward, quiet date. Too awkward and too quiet.

 

[JWGunslinger]

Exellent thread as usual LSN and some great stories from everyone especially Dagger and Sally, I feel much better about my bad dates from the past now.

My bad dates have never been with wildly rude girls or drunken nights of horror, mostly just akward dates and akward endings to relationships. But my worst date was the summer of 2009 when a girl i'd always had classes with but never was close to started chatting with me on facebook when she noticed that we had alot in common. I set up a date for us to go to a Trace Adkins and Toby Keith concert about an hour from here and everything seemed like it was going to be great. In the weeks leading into the concert we texted constantly and we both seemed really into each other, the day came and the drive there(with a stop for dinner at Chilis) were great, we talked the entire time without running out of things to talk about and we seemed to fit together quite well.

Then we get to the concert and things change, on the way she seemed very relaxed and happy but as soon as we got to the grass seats she seemed weird, she spaced herself from me a bit when we were sitting and I didn't think anything of it other than her being nervous on our first time out, but then she spent most of the concert texting her friends. When the headliners came out she put it away to listen for a bit and watch but then it was right back to the phone, I would talk to her but and she'd respond but wouldn't get rid of the phone. I tried to just enjoy myself so I just focused on the killer concert and sang along since I knew all the words, I asked her to sing with me and she said she had a traumatic experience as a child in chior and she didn't like singing in public after that, so theres another awk moment. Then turns out her friends she was texting were at the show too so she had us go hang out with them and that was one of those situations where you're right there with em but not included at all. Then the concert ended and we went home, normal drive home and it was just like before.

As for what happened to our situation later, on the drive there and before the concert she was always complaining about her ex and what a dick he was and how much better I was than him. Then about a month after the concert she went running after him to Texas(watch out Dagger, she's in Austin so steer clear ) and as far as I know she's back with him and he still treats her like shit. I didn't change anything dating wise after this and I didn't really learn anything other than to just have a good time with the situation no matter how awk things are or how the connection is. Dating advice for single guys out there, be a gentleman and one day the right girl will wander into your life, mine wandered back into my life 4 months later and that girl is fiance and the greatest thing to ever happen to me.

 

[Paralyzer Z]

nice thread. now even though i have never been on a "date" a have bad romance storires to indeed tell.

I have never been a ladies man and I most likley will never be. I met this new kid 2 years ago at my school and at first he seemed like a nice guy. when realizing that i am a huge nerd he began to ake advantage of me, and made fun of me because i never had a girlfriend( apparently 13 year olds, my age the time are suppoded to have had multiple relationships at the time). so he began screaming out loud that I liked a certain girl (which i did not) but he continued anyways.

Eventually he did it in the middle of a math class in which he yelled out that i liked an extremely hot girl in the class. unfortunaltey although she was very pretty she had a ghetto atitude and when she asked if that was true i said "no" she petted on the head but afterwards bothered me about for the rest of the year. my face was red and i couldnt control it and everyone including the girl was laughing at me for rejecting a girl out of my leauge.

later on somethign worse would happen. He did the same thing in a science class and a bad trend began. It was another girl this time, she was jealous that I was smarter than her so as a joke she would jokingly ask me out everyday in front of the class and embarris me while she just laughed to when i constantly rejected her and my face got red. I had her again in a class the next year and she didnt bother me but I began to fall for her but it never amounted to anything.

eventualy the shithead who caused this got nailed in the nuts by my best friend, the ghetto girl smiled at me when i looked scared when she asked for a pice of paper, and the jealous girl ended up being a lasting memory.
I cant imagine what going to happen to me on real dates

 

[Sheamus' Suntan]

Odd topic LSN but yet another great one and thou shalt get repped in due time.

My worst date was one of my first. I was about 16 and had been talking to someone who had added me on MSN. I didn't know who the girl was but she lived in the area and seemed really sweet. So we went on webcam with her and her friends and me, and then in the end we met up as a casual date.

Everything was fine until she awkwardly went "I want to go shopping." So I took her - and her 4 friends shopping. Immediately she went for underwear which I didn't really know how to respond to. I was a virgin at this point (proud to say I was 18 until I lost it, unlike many males who want to lose virginity ASAP) and I wasn't about to be suckered into something unless I was ready - which I knew at the age of 16, my right hand was about the only thing I was ready to make love to.

So I went to stand outside while they all went to window shop at bras and underwear. Needless to say, I got bored and started talking to another one of her friends who had decided to accompany me. We talked a fair bit, then she came out of the shop. Luckily she didn't accuse me of anything weird, and we went about our day.

We got to the end of the day where we all decided to go to a park to have a picnic. So we brought loads of food and drink and for some unknown reason, a bag of flour which I promptly tipped over a goth guy for the sake of it. Seemed fun at the time.

We all sat around doing not much when she turned and said "Let's get away from the group for a bit." I asked why, I was having fun and I thought she was and she replied with "Well you know."

The reason why I find this odd is PURELY because of the roll reversal and how much of a **** this 14 year old was. Turns out, she was cousins with someone who had threatened to kill me if I went near a friend of mine at school. Yeah, apparently the circles I hung around with were THAT protective and fucked up.

So anyway yeah. Weird date ended with her saying "we're having a party on friday, its a BYOB party and you can come along. We could find a room somewhere and have our own party." I declined, saying it was no go, I wasn't interested in sex, I just wanted companionship at that point. As a 16 year old, I was very grown up, I feel.

So anyway, next day I text her. She turns and says that we never dated, we were never together, kisses we shared meant nothing and despite us saying we were together on the day and clearly getting together, because I never "asked her out", I was therefore never with her.

I vowed to NEVER get with a girl more than 2 years my younger from there on because she was a dangerous headfuck who pretty much...confused the hell out of me, a poor 16 year old who had never really bothered with dating before.

I'm now 22. Got a son. Been with one girl now for 3 and a half years.
Oh how things change.