klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Thursday
Imapct Wrestling
Date: September 20, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
It's Open Fight Night again and based on the history that this concept has, not a lot is going to happen. We're on the road to Bound For Glory and with four shows left, the main story is who is the mole in TNA that is helping Aces and 8's. We might get some answers to that tonight as Joseph Park has promised to give us a major piece of evidence tonight in his investigation of the case. Let's get to it.
After the usual intro, we open with Hulk and Shaquille O'Neal in the back. Shaq says he's got Hulk's back tonight. He's leaving now but he'll be back later.
We open with Angle and Styles in the ring. Angle talks about the history he and AJ have with the tag champs and how they earned a tag title shot last week. However, Hernandez and Chavo got one as well. Since it's Open Fight Night, let's see which contenders are better. Angle sounded like he was slurring his speech here a bit.
Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle
AJ and Chavo get things going and they immediately take it to the mat with AJ getting only a tiny advantage before they get back to their feet. Off to Angle vs. SuperMex with Hernandez easily taking Angle into the corner. He slams Kurt down and it's off to Chavo to speed things up. Chavo takes it to the mat for some reason and hooks a headlock. Angle easily suplexes him down to take over followed by a release overhead belly to belly. The tag champs are on the stage as we take a break.
Back with AJ holding Chavo in a chinlock on the mat. Apparently AJ hit the drop down/kick during the break to take over. Chavo fights up and brings in Hernandez again to start throwing around people like small villagers. Angle saves AJ from the Border Toss but Chavo takes out both his opponents with a single dropkick off the top. Chavo can't suplex AJ so Styles kicks him in the face and brings in Angle for a bunch of suplexes. Hernandez breaks up the ankle lock on Chavo but AJ kicks Hernandez's head off.
There's the ankle lock on Chavo again but he kicks Angle off. AJ comes in with the springboard forearm but Hernandez comes in with a kind of over the shoulder slam. Angle Slam takes Hernandez out but Chavo hits Three Amigos on Angle. AJ breaks up the third but takes three suplexes from Chavo instead. Chavo loads up the Frog Splash but Angle breaks it up. Hernandez breaks up the breaking up and the Frog Splash misses AJ. Pele takes Chavo down but the tag champs run in for the DQ to break up the Styles Clash at 12:22.
Hogan comes out (quoting Jay Z of all people) and makes the triple threat for the PPV.
Al Snow talks about the Gut Check guy tonight but doesn't says he didn't cross the line with Joey Ryan.
Hogan is on the phone with somebody who is apparently Joseph Park. Park is five cars back but will be here with the evidence tonight.
Samoa Joe talks about BFG 08 and diving out of the sky box onto Sting.
Evan Markopolis (screw trying to spell that one right) talks about wrestling since he was 13.
Dixie yells at Bruce Pritchard about Aces and 8's being in the place they want to be. Al Snow comes in and Dixie changes the subject. Ok then.
Gut Check: Evan Markopolis vs. Douglas Williams
The fans are behind Evan even though he's taken down almost immediately. Apparently there are going to be Gut Checks at live events. Sure why not. Williams controls with ease and makes Markopolis look like he has no idea what he's doing. Evan tries a sunset flip but Williams knees him in the face. When all else fails, HIT HIM IN THE FACE! Evan hits a quick dropkick and crossbody but Williams doesn't even let him get a one count. A delayed vertical suplex puts Evan down and Doug gets ticked off. He throws Evan down and puts on an arm trap headlock for the tap out at 4:04.
We recap the latest issues with Roode vs. Storm, these being from No Surrender.
Here's Storm to the ring to call out Bobby Roode. Storm says this is going to be a fight instead of a match and he wants the coward to come out right now. Here's Roode in a suit. Roode says that he's overdressed for a fight tonight, but it doesn't matter because Roode isn't fighting. Storm is never going to be a world champion again and Roode walks away, saying Storm can fight somebody else.
Roode goes to the back and runs into Hogan. Hogan yells about Roode bailing and says that if Roode doesn't go fight in three minutes, he's sitting home for the rest of the year.
Post break (three minutes and forty three seconds later. Hulk Hogan is a liar) Storm calls Roode out again and Bobby comes out very slowly. Storm charges up the ramp and beats on Roode with a shoe. He also chokes with a shirt as there's a referee here for some reason. They head up to the stage with Roode being rammed into the set. Storm jumps off the stage but Roode catches him with a punch to the ribs.
They head to the ring and we actually get a bell.
Bobby Roode vs. James Storm
Roode is almost immediately clotheslined to the floor but he comes back with a shot to the head. Storm sends him into the steps but Roode sends Storm into the barricade. Roode finds a beer but Storm blocks the shot to the head. They've been in the ring for about eight seconds in total so far. Roode sends him into the post but misses a chair shot. Storm sends him (you may be noticing a pattern emerging) into the boot of a fan but Roode sends him into the barricade. They're actually rolling into the ring to break counts. Storm rams him into various steel objects but has a suplex reversed onto the floor.
They FINALLY get in the ring for more than a few seconds with Roode hitting a big clothesline to take over. He shoves the referee and throws Storm right back to the floor. Storm shoves the referee away again and that's enough to throw it out at 6:24. I'm not even going to bother rating this as it wasn't anything resembling a match.
They keep fighting up to the set again and then into the back. Storm rams him into various objects and they head out the door.
Hogan talks to some guy who was sent to find Joseph Park but it hasn't worked. Hogan gets a phone call from Aces and 8's who apparently have a corporate lawyer now. Hogan says they'll play tonight and hangs up. He says he knows where Park is.
Aries goes to see Jeff Hardy about Bound For Glory. Hardy has had a Hall of Fame career and Aries wants that. He wants a bunch of sheep to follow him and he gets that by winning at BFG. Tonight, Aries is going to prove that anything Hardy can do, Aries can do better. I'd guess that means Aries vs. Ray tonight.
Here's Tara to explain why she did what she did last week. She says Tessmacher used her to get on TV and make her own career. Tara's new boyfriend, some Hollywood star who she doesn't name, opened her eyes. Tara calls out Christy for some reason. Christy very slowly gets in and Tara accuses her of babying Tessmacher. Tara demands that Christy say who her favorite Knockout is. Christy says Tessmacher, which gets her a beating until Tessmacher makes the save.
Brooke Hogan promises consequences for Tara next week.
RVD talks about his BFG matches against Jerry Lynn and Abyss at BFG.
The TV Title is decided next week. No word on who is in the match.
Here's Hogan.....again. He doesn't like hearing about Aces and 8's kidnapping Park but apparently has given up something in exchange for him. Apparently Hogan will go to Aces and 8's clubhouse or whatever that is. The boss pops up on screen and says that next week it's Clubhouse Rules. They have Park's computer and break it because he figured it out. Park is in a cage and says he has the information in his head. They hit him in the head with a hammer and Hogan's jaw is shaking as we cut to a break.
Video on Hardy and how much BFG means to him.
Here's the world champ who says he's the hunter rather than the hunted at BFG. He calls out Ray to prove he can beat Ray better than Hardy did last week. Ray comes out and runs his mouth as per usual, including yelling at a fan. If the fan touches Ray again, Ray is going to hit him in the face. Aries says he'll hit the fan also, which is a pretty heelish thing to say. Ray says his catchphrase but Aries dives over the top to take him out.
Austin Aries vs. Bully Ray
After some punching on the floor by the champ, we head into the ring with Aries in control. Ray kicks Aries off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Ray pulling on Aries' face followed by a splash for two. Ray keeps pounding away with the big and hard shots to Aries while yelling at Earl Hebner at the same time. Earl argues back as you would expect him to and Aries gets in some offense to come back.
They keep slugging it out with Aries going down every time, only to make his comeback every single time. Ray rakes the eyes to finally stop him for a bit, only to run into a discus forearm. Aries guillotines him on the top rope and hits a missile dropkick for two. Aries can't hit the brainbuster but Ray misses his drop down attempt. Ray whips him into the referee and Aries puts on the Last Chancery for the tap but there's no one to see it. Ray loads up the chain and KO's Aries with it in the corner for the pin at 12:21.
Post match Ray hugs Hebner in a funny bit. Ray holds up the title and goes to clock Aries with it but Hardy makes the save. Hardy holds up the title, causing Aries to freak out on him to end the show.
Results
AJ Styles/Kurt Angle vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez went to a no contest when Daniels and Kazarian interfered
Douglas Williams b. Evan Markopolis Arm Trap Headlock
James Storm vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest
Bully Ray b. Austin Aries Pin after a shot with a chain
Friday
Beth Phoenix appears to be done with WWE or will be done very soon.
Impact got a 1.0, up slightly from the last two weeks.
Smackdown
Date: September 21, 2012
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews
Night of Champions is over and not a ton has changed on Smackdown. Sheamus is still the champion after pinning Del Rio with a Brogue Kick. This is of course more exciting than the other two times he pinned Del Rio with the Brogue Kick because in this, the move wasn't legal until seconds before the match. Hopefully someone new challenges the champ before HIAC. Let's get to it.
Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is a hospital that is letting its service to customers fall apart because it let a ton of its workers go to cut costs.
The main event is a tag match of course. In this case it's Ziggler/Del Rio vs. Orton/Sheamus.
We open the show with EDGE! It's Philly so you know the fans erupt for him. He has really short hair now which is a look that kind of works for him. Edge says coming out here like that never gets old. He's here because Philly is the home of the Broad Street Bullies and because it's been 18 months since his retirement. He's been able to sit at home and watch WWE as a fan again, but he's never seen anything as crazy as he's seen lately.
We get a clip from Monday with Bryan and Kane arguing over the titles and then hugging it out before shouting at each other that they're the tag team champions. He doesn't understand how this could happen and would like an explanation, which leads to him being cut off by Bryan. Bryan corrects Edge on his use of pronouns. THEY didn't become tag team champions. Bryan is the tag team champions.
Bryan starts yelling again but Edge says chill. He asks Bryan about the little world Bryan lives in now but Bryan says he's a rock and at one with his emotions. Edge says excuse me when Bryan says all this, which Bryan interprets as repressed thoughts about Vickie. Bryan says Edge's theme music (You think you know me) tells the whole story: no one really knows Edge. If Bryan really knew Edge, he would know that hasn't been his theme music in years.
Bryan says there is nothing anyone can do to make him snap. Edge: Well played grasshopper. Edge says that wasn't his intention but it sounds like a challenge. It turns into the Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck routine of yes it is/no it isn't before Edge turns the tables and Bryan goes into a rant of NO IT WASN'T which draws out Kane.
Kane and Bryan argue over the same thing they always argue about before Edge shouts them down. Kane: Edge, calm down buddy. You know Dr. Shelby has some great relaxation exercises. Edge snaps again because while he gets Bryan being at peace and such, he doesn't get Kane at all. Edge gives us a quick history of himself vs. Kane, including the weddings and the torture they've put each other through. He leaves out the time that he caused Kane to seemingly murder his father but there's a lot of history to get through.
Kane wants to rectify this right now and steps back as if to fight. Edge takes his jacket off but Kane opens his arms to hug it out. Edge is a combination of reluctant and shocked but he eventually hugs Kane. Bryan SNAPS, shouting NO over and over again for no apparent reason. Edge and Kane open their arms for a group hug and Bryan looks like it's Christmas morning.
This draws out Sandow for no apparent reason. He's here to help of course because for the last fortnight, this serial has been brought down by the attempts at hugging it out. He blames the fans for bringing down the show before Edge cuts him off. Edge talks about how he'd rather watch the champions hug it out for the whole show instead of listening to Sandow for thirty seconds. Edge says Sandow should come out and fight one of these two and after a lengthy audience poll, Kane is picked as the opponent.
Kane vs. Damien Sandow
This starts after a break and at the end of the previous nearly 20 minute segment. It was entertaining and got the job done though which is all that matters. Kane knocks Sandow to the floor with a shoulder to start and an uppercut knocks Damien to the floor. Back in and a big boot takes Sandow down again.
Damien bails to the floor but runs into Bryan. Sandow guillotines him on the ropes to take over The offense only lasts a few seconds as Sandow walks into the side slam and there's the top rope clothesline. Bryan gets on the apron as Kane is loading up the chokeslam. The distractions lets Sandow hit his neckbreaker for the pin at 3:05.
Back from a break....and it's more Kane. He's freaking out looking for Bryan but finds Dr. Shelby. Shelby tries to calm him down but Kane calls Bryan a goatface. Bryan pops up for ANOTHER argument until Dr. Shelby snaps. Shelby wants to try a trust exercise. Kane promises to not rip Bryan's beard off in exchange for his title back. That's not enough though as Bryan cost Kane a match. Shelby offers to talk to Booker and get Bryan a match tonight. That makes Kane feel better and he says he's the tag team champions before leaving.
I'd like to note we're about 35 minutes into this show and we've seen NOTHING but Bryan and Kane stuff. They're going to run this into the ground and they're going to do it soon.
Tonight the Brogue Kick controversy continues. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO CONTINUE? It's over.
Booker comes into his office to find Del Rio. Alberto calls Booker a coward and wants to know why the Brogue Kick was reinstated. Booker says his investigation was over. The kick is dangerous but it's legal. If Alberto doesn't want to get hurt, don't mess with Sheamus. PREACH IT BOOKER MAN! Alberto asks for another title shot but Booker says Alberto has to earn it. He can do that in the tag match apparently.
Eve comes out for commentary.
Layla vs. Natalya
Layla easily takes Natalya down to start but she keeps pointing at and glaring at Layla. Natalya gets in a shot to the ribs and puts on an abdominal stretch which Layla rolls out of. Sharpshooter is countered and the Layout gets the pin on Nattie at 1:30.
Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus/Randy Orton
Pretty early for the main event. This is joined in progress after a break but it doesn't look like we missed much. Sheamus and Del Rio start things off and Alberto pounds Sheamus down into the corner. Sheamus shrugs him off and brings in Orton for a dropkick for two. Back to the champ to pound on Del Rio some more, only to be sent into the corner and get caught by a running kick to the shoulder.
Cole talks about JBL climbing a mountain because Sheamus vs. Del Rio isn't capable of holding his interest. A shoulder block takes Del Rio down but the managers get on the apron, letting Ziggler get in a shot to take over. Off to a chinlock from Dolph before it's back to Del Rio. This is dull stuff so far. Del Rio hooks a chinlock of his own but Sheamus gets up with ease.
A powerslam puts Del Rio down and it's off to Orton who cleans house. Both heels get powerslams but Del Rio hits a Backstabber for two. It's Ziggler vs. Orton now with Ziggler hitting a dropkick for two. It's back to Del Rio but Orton dropkicks him to the floor almost immediately. Hot tag brings in Sheamus who cleans house again but Dolph avoids the Brogue Kick. Irish Curse gets two on Ziggler and there's an RKO to Alberto. Brogue Kick takes out Ziggler for the pin at 8:19.
Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes
Feeling out process to start with Bryan taking over, only to yell at the crowd and let Cody get in some offense. Bryan moonsaults out of the corner and clotheslines Cody down followed by a dropkick in the corner. He loads up the NO Lock but here's Kane. The hold never goes on and Cody uses the distraction to hit Cross Rhodes for the pin at 2:10.
Back from a break and Kane and Bryan are fighting some more. Well it had been a full ten minutes so it's to be expected. Bryan wants to know why Kane did that but Kane has no idea what Bryan is talking about. Kane says they're even so Bryan says Kane belongs in a basement. Kane says Bryan belongs in a petting zoo. They yell some more until they see Sandow and Rhodes standing off to the side. A tag match is made for later tonight. The champs argue over who the other guys are more scared of.
We recap the end of the PPV and Raw.
Brodus Clay vs. Heath Slater
Brodus does his full intro again. It's a dance off to start as you would expect. Brodus takes over with his usual power stuff and there's the release suplex. And here are Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre to jump Brodus for the DQ at 1:10. So is Brodus feuding with these two now instead of Cesaro which was teased on Monday? Or is it the rest of the world vs. Planet Funk?
Santino Marella vs. Antonio Cesaro
Well of course Brodus can't fight Cesaro. It's time for Santino to fight him for the 95th time this month. Cesaro immediately takes him down and hits the gutwrench suplex. Off to the cravate but Santino comes back with his usual. There's the Cobra but Aksana distracts him again. Aksana tries to get the sock but falls into the ring. Cesaro hits the European Uppercut and in the distraction, Santino rolls him up for the pin at 1:50. Well of course since there is NO ONE ELSE IN THE COMPANY that can fight Cesaro.
Cesaro dumps Aksana post match in five languages.
Kane/Daniel Bryan vs. Damien Sandow/Cody Rhodes
This is a lumberjack match for no apparent reason with the Usos, Kidd/Gabriel and the Prime Time Players at ringside. The non-champions don't even get an entrance. Kane and Cody start things off with Rhodes being pounded down very quickly. Cody brings in Sandow but Kane has to pull him into the ring. There's the low dropkick but Bryan tags himself in before Kane can cover. Guess what that leads to.
Cody got tagged in during the argument and Bryan fires off kicks at the chest. Bryan goes to tag Kane but shouts NO instead. The Disaster Kick gets two on Bryan and Sandow jumps Kane on the floor. Cody and Bryan collide in the ring and it's off to Kane a few seconds later. Sandow avoids a chokeslam once but the second attempt works, but here's Cody with a chair for the DQ at 4:09.
Post match Bryan stops Cody from using the chair but can't bring himself to hit Cody with said chair. Instead he hands it to Kane who blasts Cody out of the ring. Bryan gets his own chair and they take turns destroying Sandow with it. They probably hit him twenty times between the pair of them. Kane puts his chair down and beats up the other three teams, feeding them into Bryan for chair shots. Bryan and Kane stand in the ring with their titles and chairs as bodies surround them. They argue one more time to end the show.
Results
Damien Sandow b. Kane Double Arm Neckbreaker
Layla b. Natalya Layout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan Cross Rhodes
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater via DQ when Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre interfered
Santino Marella b. Antonio Cesaro Rollup
Kane/Daniel Bryan b. Damien Sandow/Cody Rhodes via DQ when Rhodes used a chair
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing either.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Rey Mysterio/Sin Cara b. Epico/Primo Swanton Bomb to Epico
Eve Torres b. Beth Phoenix Rollup
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater Splash
Dolph Ziggler b. Santino Marella Zig Zag
Wade Barrett b. Justin Gabriel Right Hand
Daniel Bryan/Kane b. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth NO Lock to R-Truth
Randy Orton b. Tensai RKO
Damien Sandow b. Zach Ryder Double Arm Neckbreaker
John Cena/Sheamus b. CM Punk/Alberto Del Rio AA to Punk
NXT
Trent Barreta b. Johnny Curtis Running Knee Smash
Paige b. Alicia Fox Leg Trap DDT
Conor O'Brien b. Jimmy Uso Running Boot To The Face
Kassius Ohno b. Oliver Gray Reverse Cravate
Seth Rollins b. Rick Victor Blackout
Impact Wrestling
AJ Styles/Kurt Angle vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez went to a no contest when Daniels and Kazarian interfered
Douglas Williams b. Evan Markopolis Arm Trap Headlock
James Storm vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest
Bully Ray b. Austin Aries Pin after a shot with a chain
Smackdown
Damien Sandow b. Kane Double Arm Neckbreaker
Layla b. Natalya Layout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan Cross Rhodes
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater via DQ when Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre interfered
Santino Marella b. Antonio Cesaro Rollup
Kane/Daniel Bryan b. Damien Sandow/Cody Rhodes via DQ when Rhodes used a chair
Imapct Wrestling
Date: September 20, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
It's Open Fight Night again and based on the history that this concept has, not a lot is going to happen. We're on the road to Bound For Glory and with four shows left, the main story is who is the mole in TNA that is helping Aces and 8's. We might get some answers to that tonight as Joseph Park has promised to give us a major piece of evidence tonight in his investigation of the case. Let's get to it.
After the usual intro, we open with Hulk and Shaquille O'Neal in the back. Shaq says he's got Hulk's back tonight. He's leaving now but he'll be back later.
We open with Angle and Styles in the ring. Angle talks about the history he and AJ have with the tag champs and how they earned a tag title shot last week. However, Hernandez and Chavo got one as well. Since it's Open Fight Night, let's see which contenders are better. Angle sounded like he was slurring his speech here a bit.
Hernandez/Chavo Guerrero vs. AJ Styles/Kurt Angle
AJ and Chavo get things going and they immediately take it to the mat with AJ getting only a tiny advantage before they get back to their feet. Off to Angle vs. SuperMex with Hernandez easily taking Angle into the corner. He slams Kurt down and it's off to Chavo to speed things up. Chavo takes it to the mat for some reason and hooks a headlock. Angle easily suplexes him down to take over followed by a release overhead belly to belly. The tag champs are on the stage as we take a break.
Back with AJ holding Chavo in a chinlock on the mat. Apparently AJ hit the drop down/kick during the break to take over. Chavo fights up and brings in Hernandez again to start throwing around people like small villagers. Angle saves AJ from the Border Toss but Chavo takes out both his opponents with a single dropkick off the top. Chavo can't suplex AJ so Styles kicks him in the face and brings in Angle for a bunch of suplexes. Hernandez breaks up the ankle lock on Chavo but AJ kicks Hernandez's head off.
There's the ankle lock on Chavo again but he kicks Angle off. AJ comes in with the springboard forearm but Hernandez comes in with a kind of over the shoulder slam. Angle Slam takes Hernandez out but Chavo hits Three Amigos on Angle. AJ breaks up the third but takes three suplexes from Chavo instead. Chavo loads up the Frog Splash but Angle breaks it up. Hernandez breaks up the breaking up and the Frog Splash misses AJ. Pele takes Chavo down but the tag champs run in for the DQ to break up the Styles Clash at 12:22.
Hogan comes out (quoting Jay Z of all people) and makes the triple threat for the PPV.
Al Snow talks about the Gut Check guy tonight but doesn't says he didn't cross the line with Joey Ryan.
Hogan is on the phone with somebody who is apparently Joseph Park. Park is five cars back but will be here with the evidence tonight.
Samoa Joe talks about BFG 08 and diving out of the sky box onto Sting.
Evan Markopolis (screw trying to spell that one right) talks about wrestling since he was 13.
Dixie yells at Bruce Pritchard about Aces and 8's being in the place they want to be. Al Snow comes in and Dixie changes the subject. Ok then.
Gut Check: Evan Markopolis vs. Douglas Williams
The fans are behind Evan even though he's taken down almost immediately. Apparently there are going to be Gut Checks at live events. Sure why not. Williams controls with ease and makes Markopolis look like he has no idea what he's doing. Evan tries a sunset flip but Williams knees him in the face. When all else fails, HIT HIM IN THE FACE! Evan hits a quick dropkick and crossbody but Williams doesn't even let him get a one count. A delayed vertical suplex puts Evan down and Doug gets ticked off. He throws Evan down and puts on an arm trap headlock for the tap out at 4:04.
We recap the latest issues with Roode vs. Storm, these being from No Surrender.
Here's Storm to the ring to call out Bobby Roode. Storm says this is going to be a fight instead of a match and he wants the coward to come out right now. Here's Roode in a suit. Roode says that he's overdressed for a fight tonight, but it doesn't matter because Roode isn't fighting. Storm is never going to be a world champion again and Roode walks away, saying Storm can fight somebody else.
Roode goes to the back and runs into Hogan. Hogan yells about Roode bailing and says that if Roode doesn't go fight in three minutes, he's sitting home for the rest of the year.
Post break (three minutes and forty three seconds later. Hulk Hogan is a liar) Storm calls Roode out again and Bobby comes out very slowly. Storm charges up the ramp and beats on Roode with a shoe. He also chokes with a shirt as there's a referee here for some reason. They head up to the stage with Roode being rammed into the set. Storm jumps off the stage but Roode catches him with a punch to the ribs.
They head to the ring and we actually get a bell.
Bobby Roode vs. James Storm
Roode is almost immediately clotheslined to the floor but he comes back with a shot to the head. Storm sends him into the steps but Roode sends Storm into the barricade. Roode finds a beer but Storm blocks the shot to the head. They've been in the ring for about eight seconds in total so far. Roode sends him into the post but misses a chair shot. Storm sends him (you may be noticing a pattern emerging) into the boot of a fan but Roode sends him into the barricade. They're actually rolling into the ring to break counts. Storm rams him into various steel objects but has a suplex reversed onto the floor.
They FINALLY get in the ring for more than a few seconds with Roode hitting a big clothesline to take over. He shoves the referee and throws Storm right back to the floor. Storm shoves the referee away again and that's enough to throw it out at 6:24. I'm not even going to bother rating this as it wasn't anything resembling a match.
They keep fighting up to the set again and then into the back. Storm rams him into various objects and they head out the door.
Hogan talks to some guy who was sent to find Joseph Park but it hasn't worked. Hogan gets a phone call from Aces and 8's who apparently have a corporate lawyer now. Hogan says they'll play tonight and hangs up. He says he knows where Park is.
Aries goes to see Jeff Hardy about Bound For Glory. Hardy has had a Hall of Fame career and Aries wants that. He wants a bunch of sheep to follow him and he gets that by winning at BFG. Tonight, Aries is going to prove that anything Hardy can do, Aries can do better. I'd guess that means Aries vs. Ray tonight.
Here's Tara to explain why she did what she did last week. She says Tessmacher used her to get on TV and make her own career. Tara's new boyfriend, some Hollywood star who she doesn't name, opened her eyes. Tara calls out Christy for some reason. Christy very slowly gets in and Tara accuses her of babying Tessmacher. Tara demands that Christy say who her favorite Knockout is. Christy says Tessmacher, which gets her a beating until Tessmacher makes the save.
Brooke Hogan promises consequences for Tara next week.
RVD talks about his BFG matches against Jerry Lynn and Abyss at BFG.
The TV Title is decided next week. No word on who is in the match.
Here's Hogan.....again. He doesn't like hearing about Aces and 8's kidnapping Park but apparently has given up something in exchange for him. Apparently Hogan will go to Aces and 8's clubhouse or whatever that is. The boss pops up on screen and says that next week it's Clubhouse Rules. They have Park's computer and break it because he figured it out. Park is in a cage and says he has the information in his head. They hit him in the head with a hammer and Hogan's jaw is shaking as we cut to a break.
Video on Hardy and how much BFG means to him.
Here's the world champ who says he's the hunter rather than the hunted at BFG. He calls out Ray to prove he can beat Ray better than Hardy did last week. Ray comes out and runs his mouth as per usual, including yelling at a fan. If the fan touches Ray again, Ray is going to hit him in the face. Aries says he'll hit the fan also, which is a pretty heelish thing to say. Ray says his catchphrase but Aries dives over the top to take him out.
Austin Aries vs. Bully Ray
After some punching on the floor by the champ, we head into the ring with Aries in control. Ray kicks Aries off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Ray pulling on Aries' face followed by a splash for two. Ray keeps pounding away with the big and hard shots to Aries while yelling at Earl Hebner at the same time. Earl argues back as you would expect him to and Aries gets in some offense to come back.
They keep slugging it out with Aries going down every time, only to make his comeback every single time. Ray rakes the eyes to finally stop him for a bit, only to run into a discus forearm. Aries guillotines him on the top rope and hits a missile dropkick for two. Aries can't hit the brainbuster but Ray misses his drop down attempt. Ray whips him into the referee and Aries puts on the Last Chancery for the tap but there's no one to see it. Ray loads up the chain and KO's Aries with it in the corner for the pin at 12:21.
Post match Ray hugs Hebner in a funny bit. Ray holds up the title and goes to clock Aries with it but Hardy makes the save. Hardy holds up the title, causing Aries to freak out on him to end the show.
Results
AJ Styles/Kurt Angle vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez went to a no contest when Daniels and Kazarian interfered
Douglas Williams b. Evan Markopolis Arm Trap Headlock
James Storm vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest
Bully Ray b. Austin Aries Pin after a shot with a chain
Friday
Beth Phoenix appears to be done with WWE or will be done very soon.
Impact got a 1.0, up slightly from the last two weeks.
Smackdown
Date: September 21, 2012
Location: Wells Fargo Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews
Night of Champions is over and not a ton has changed on Smackdown. Sheamus is still the champion after pinning Del Rio with a Brogue Kick. This is of course more exciting than the other two times he pinned Del Rio with the Brogue Kick because in this, the move wasn't legal until seconds before the match. Hopefully someone new challenges the champ before HIAC. Let's get to it.
Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is a hospital that is letting its service to customers fall apart because it let a ton of its workers go to cut costs.
The main event is a tag match of course. In this case it's Ziggler/Del Rio vs. Orton/Sheamus.
We open the show with EDGE! It's Philly so you know the fans erupt for him. He has really short hair now which is a look that kind of works for him. Edge says coming out here like that never gets old. He's here because Philly is the home of the Broad Street Bullies and because it's been 18 months since his retirement. He's been able to sit at home and watch WWE as a fan again, but he's never seen anything as crazy as he's seen lately.
We get a clip from Monday with Bryan and Kane arguing over the titles and then hugging it out before shouting at each other that they're the tag team champions. He doesn't understand how this could happen and would like an explanation, which leads to him being cut off by Bryan. Bryan corrects Edge on his use of pronouns. THEY didn't become tag team champions. Bryan is the tag team champions.
Bryan starts yelling again but Edge says chill. He asks Bryan about the little world Bryan lives in now but Bryan says he's a rock and at one with his emotions. Edge says excuse me when Bryan says all this, which Bryan interprets as repressed thoughts about Vickie. Bryan says Edge's theme music (You think you know me) tells the whole story: no one really knows Edge. If Bryan really knew Edge, he would know that hasn't been his theme music in years.
Bryan says there is nothing anyone can do to make him snap. Edge: Well played grasshopper. Edge says that wasn't his intention but it sounds like a challenge. It turns into the Bugs Bunny/Daffy Duck routine of yes it is/no it isn't before Edge turns the tables and Bryan goes into a rant of NO IT WASN'T which draws out Kane.
Kane and Bryan argue over the same thing they always argue about before Edge shouts them down. Kane: Edge, calm down buddy. You know Dr. Shelby has some great relaxation exercises. Edge snaps again because while he gets Bryan being at peace and such, he doesn't get Kane at all. Edge gives us a quick history of himself vs. Kane, including the weddings and the torture they've put each other through. He leaves out the time that he caused Kane to seemingly murder his father but there's a lot of history to get through.
Kane wants to rectify this right now and steps back as if to fight. Edge takes his jacket off but Kane opens his arms to hug it out. Edge is a combination of reluctant and shocked but he eventually hugs Kane. Bryan SNAPS, shouting NO over and over again for no apparent reason. Edge and Kane open their arms for a group hug and Bryan looks like it's Christmas morning.
This draws out Sandow for no apparent reason. He's here to help of course because for the last fortnight, this serial has been brought down by the attempts at hugging it out. He blames the fans for bringing down the show before Edge cuts him off. Edge talks about how he'd rather watch the champions hug it out for the whole show instead of listening to Sandow for thirty seconds. Edge says Sandow should come out and fight one of these two and after a lengthy audience poll, Kane is picked as the opponent.
Kane vs. Damien Sandow
This starts after a break and at the end of the previous nearly 20 minute segment. It was entertaining and got the job done though which is all that matters. Kane knocks Sandow to the floor with a shoulder to start and an uppercut knocks Damien to the floor. Back in and a big boot takes Sandow down again.
Damien bails to the floor but runs into Bryan. Sandow guillotines him on the ropes to take over The offense only lasts a few seconds as Sandow walks into the side slam and there's the top rope clothesline. Bryan gets on the apron as Kane is loading up the chokeslam. The distractions lets Sandow hit his neckbreaker for the pin at 3:05.
Back from a break....and it's more Kane. He's freaking out looking for Bryan but finds Dr. Shelby. Shelby tries to calm him down but Kane calls Bryan a goatface. Bryan pops up for ANOTHER argument until Dr. Shelby snaps. Shelby wants to try a trust exercise. Kane promises to not rip Bryan's beard off in exchange for his title back. That's not enough though as Bryan cost Kane a match. Shelby offers to talk to Booker and get Bryan a match tonight. That makes Kane feel better and he says he's the tag team champions before leaving.
I'd like to note we're about 35 minutes into this show and we've seen NOTHING but Bryan and Kane stuff. They're going to run this into the ground and they're going to do it soon.
Tonight the Brogue Kick controversy continues. WHY DOES IT HAVE TO CONTINUE? It's over.
Booker comes into his office to find Del Rio. Alberto calls Booker a coward and wants to know why the Brogue Kick was reinstated. Booker says his investigation was over. The kick is dangerous but it's legal. If Alberto doesn't want to get hurt, don't mess with Sheamus. PREACH IT BOOKER MAN! Alberto asks for another title shot but Booker says Alberto has to earn it. He can do that in the tag match apparently.
Eve comes out for commentary.
Layla vs. Natalya
Layla easily takes Natalya down to start but she keeps pointing at and glaring at Layla. Natalya gets in a shot to the ribs and puts on an abdominal stretch which Layla rolls out of. Sharpshooter is countered and the Layout gets the pin on Nattie at 1:30.
Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus/Randy Orton
Pretty early for the main event. This is joined in progress after a break but it doesn't look like we missed much. Sheamus and Del Rio start things off and Alberto pounds Sheamus down into the corner. Sheamus shrugs him off and brings in Orton for a dropkick for two. Back to the champ to pound on Del Rio some more, only to be sent into the corner and get caught by a running kick to the shoulder.
Cole talks about JBL climbing a mountain because Sheamus vs. Del Rio isn't capable of holding his interest. A shoulder block takes Del Rio down but the managers get on the apron, letting Ziggler get in a shot to take over. Off to a chinlock from Dolph before it's back to Del Rio. This is dull stuff so far. Del Rio hooks a chinlock of his own but Sheamus gets up with ease.
A powerslam puts Del Rio down and it's off to Orton who cleans house. Both heels get powerslams but Del Rio hits a Backstabber for two. It's Ziggler vs. Orton now with Ziggler hitting a dropkick for two. It's back to Del Rio but Orton dropkicks him to the floor almost immediately. Hot tag brings in Sheamus who cleans house again but Dolph avoids the Brogue Kick. Irish Curse gets two on Ziggler and there's an RKO to Alberto. Brogue Kick takes out Ziggler for the pin at 8:19.
Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes
Feeling out process to start with Bryan taking over, only to yell at the crowd and let Cody get in some offense. Bryan moonsaults out of the corner and clotheslines Cody down followed by a dropkick in the corner. He loads up the NO Lock but here's Kane. The hold never goes on and Cody uses the distraction to hit Cross Rhodes for the pin at 2:10.
Back from a break and Kane and Bryan are fighting some more. Well it had been a full ten minutes so it's to be expected. Bryan wants to know why Kane did that but Kane has no idea what Bryan is talking about. Kane says they're even so Bryan says Kane belongs in a basement. Kane says Bryan belongs in a petting zoo. They yell some more until they see Sandow and Rhodes standing off to the side. A tag match is made for later tonight. The champs argue over who the other guys are more scared of.
We recap the end of the PPV and Raw.
Brodus Clay vs. Heath Slater
Brodus does his full intro again. It's a dance off to start as you would expect. Brodus takes over with his usual power stuff and there's the release suplex. And here are Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre to jump Brodus for the DQ at 1:10. So is Brodus feuding with these two now instead of Cesaro which was teased on Monday? Or is it the rest of the world vs. Planet Funk?
Santino Marella vs. Antonio Cesaro
Well of course Brodus can't fight Cesaro. It's time for Santino to fight him for the 95th time this month. Cesaro immediately takes him down and hits the gutwrench suplex. Off to the cravate but Santino comes back with his usual. There's the Cobra but Aksana distracts him again. Aksana tries to get the sock but falls into the ring. Cesaro hits the European Uppercut and in the distraction, Santino rolls him up for the pin at 1:50. Well of course since there is NO ONE ELSE IN THE COMPANY that can fight Cesaro.
Cesaro dumps Aksana post match in five languages.
Kane/Daniel Bryan vs. Damien Sandow/Cody Rhodes
This is a lumberjack match for no apparent reason with the Usos, Kidd/Gabriel and the Prime Time Players at ringside. The non-champions don't even get an entrance. Kane and Cody start things off with Rhodes being pounded down very quickly. Cody brings in Sandow but Kane has to pull him into the ring. There's the low dropkick but Bryan tags himself in before Kane can cover. Guess what that leads to.
Cody got tagged in during the argument and Bryan fires off kicks at the chest. Bryan goes to tag Kane but shouts NO instead. The Disaster Kick gets two on Bryan and Sandow jumps Kane on the floor. Cody and Bryan collide in the ring and it's off to Kane a few seconds later. Sandow avoids a chokeslam once but the second attempt works, but here's Cody with a chair for the DQ at 4:09.
Post match Bryan stops Cody from using the chair but can't bring himself to hit Cody with said chair. Instead he hands it to Kane who blasts Cody out of the ring. Bryan gets his own chair and they take turns destroying Sandow with it. They probably hit him twenty times between the pair of them. Kane puts his chair down and beats up the other three teams, feeding them into Bryan for chair shots. Bryan and Kane stand in the ring with their titles and chairs as bodies surround them. They argue one more time to end the show.
Results
Damien Sandow b. Kane Double Arm Neckbreaker
Layla b. Natalya Layout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan Cross Rhodes
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater via DQ when Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre interfered
Santino Marella b. Antonio Cesaro Rollup
Kane/Daniel Bryan b. Damien Sandow/Cody Rhodes via DQ when Rhodes used a chair
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing either.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Rey Mysterio/Sin Cara b. Epico/Primo Swanton Bomb to Epico
Eve Torres b. Beth Phoenix Rollup
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater Splash
Dolph Ziggler b. Santino Marella Zig Zag
Wade Barrett b. Justin Gabriel Right Hand
Daniel Bryan/Kane b. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth NO Lock to R-Truth
Randy Orton b. Tensai RKO
Damien Sandow b. Zach Ryder Double Arm Neckbreaker
John Cena/Sheamus b. CM Punk/Alberto Del Rio AA to Punk
NXT
Trent Barreta b. Johnny Curtis Running Knee Smash
Paige b. Alicia Fox Leg Trap DDT
Conor O'Brien b. Jimmy Uso Running Boot To The Face
Kassius Ohno b. Oliver Gray Reverse Cravate
Seth Rollins b. Rick Victor Blackout
Impact Wrestling
AJ Styles/Kurt Angle vs. Chavo Guerrero/Hernandez went to a no contest when Daniels and Kazarian interfered
Douglas Williams b. Evan Markopolis Arm Trap Headlock
James Storm vs. Bobby Roode went to a no contest
Bully Ray b. Austin Aries Pin after a shot with a chain
Smackdown
Damien Sandow b. Kane Double Arm Neckbreaker
Layla b. Natalya Layout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan Cross Rhodes
Brodus Clay b. Heath Slater via DQ when Jinder Mahal and Drew McIntyre interfered
Santino Marella b. Antonio Cesaro Rollup
Kane/Daniel Bryan b. Damien Sandow/Cody Rhodes via DQ when Rhodes used a chair