klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Bram has been arrested for domestic battery. His wife, WWE Diva Charlotte, was not involved.
A person was shot outside the WWE Performance Center. The man was carrying a knife and had been banned from WWE property in the past.
Monday Night Raw
Date: August 31, 2015
Location: Amalie Arena, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
Last week saw the return of Sting and the disappearance of a statue, meaning tonight is likely to continue the time honored tradition of destroying that statue once and for all. Sting vs. Seth Rollins for the WWE World Title is confirmed for Night of Champions, but what about Rollins' US Title? John Cena is still lurking so let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's closing segment where Sting appeared in the statue's place. HHH made the match after the show went off the air.
Opening sequence.
Here's Sting (with complete face paint this week) to open things up. JBL: “The man who put Starrcade on the map!” Just....no. Under no circumstances can that be considered correct. Sting hasn't been around much since Wrestlemania where he lost to HHH. Due to that match, he'll always have respect for HHH, but now his sights are set on Seth Rollins.
Ever since Wrestlemania it has been injustice after injustice and last week he had to hear Seth Rollins comparing himself to names like Bruno Sammartino, Andre the Giant and the Ultimate Warrior. Sting has won titles around the world but there is one that has eluded him throughout his career. At Night of Champions, Sting is going to prove that Rollins isn't half the man HHH is and that Rollins can't hang with Sting on his best day.
Rollins is upset but Stephanie talks him down. Seth lists his accomplishments this year and calls everything Sting said wrong. Stephanie brings up Sting's comparison to HHH and thinks Sting is absolutely right. Seth wants his statue so Stephanie suggests he go ask Sting.
Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler
An attempt at a single leg doesn't get Dolph anywhere so he dropkicks Rusev in the face instead. Back in and Rusev slowly stomps Ziggler down, as is his custom. We get a dueling Rusev chant, followed by Dolph missing a splash in the corner. The sleeper slows Rusev down a bit so he backs Ziggler into the corner for a break. Ziggler gets knocked into the barricade and we take a break.
Back with Rusev throwing on a bearhug, which really should have been put on during the break. Rusev misses a charge of his own but easily breaks up a neckbreaker with a suplex. A running flip backsplash gets two more and Ziggler is in trouble. The spinwheel kick gets the same for Rusev but he walks into a superkick out of nowhere.
They head outside with Rusev charging into the steps but both guys dive in to beat the count at nine. Rusev superkicks him down as well because everyone has to use superkicks in this company. Ziggler sneaks out of the Accolade and a quick Zig Zag drops Rusev, only to have Summer come in for the DQ at 14:21.
A catfight ensues until Ziggler pulls them apart.
Post break Ziggler brags about what just happened. He goes into a room as Renee talks a bit and we see Summer sneak in behind him.
It's time for the Beat the Clock Challenge for the #1 contendership to the Divas Title, but Team Bella has something to say. Nikki is so proud of making it this far, but we've got a Bellatron counting us down to the second she breaks the record.
Alicia Fox vs. Becky Lynch
This is the first match in a Beat the Clock Challenge, meaning whoever wins in the shortest time wins, earning a title shot, presumably at Night of Champions. Becky tries for some fast rollups to start but she gets a bit sloppy and Fox takes over. A chinlock slows things down even more and you can see Becky panicking over the time being spent. Back up and some clotheslines get two for Lynch, followed by a springboard kick in the corner. They hit the mat and Becky grabs Disarm-Her for the win at 3:21.
Ryback talks about defending his title against everyone and tonight the Big Show will be no different. As he's talking, we hear someone scream and see Summer Rae running out of Ziggler's locker room. Ziggler is in a towel and looks surprised.
Intercontinental Title: Big Show vs. Ryback
Big Show is challenging, Miz is on commentary and we get big match intros. Show takes him into the corner for the loud chop to start and slowly drops an elbow for a close two. With Ryback down, Show demands a microphone so he can address the PLEASE RETIRE chants. He says find someone to do it so Ryback picks him up for a slam, only to have Show fall on him for two more. Show hits the chinlock for a few moments but Ryback fights up and hits a good looking flying tackle.
The splash is caught by the throat though, only have Ryback slip out and hook a double leg takedown (no that wasn't a spinebuster) for a near fall of his own. The Meathook is countered into the chokeslam for two but Show goes up. Since we're in Flair Country, the slam off the top is very appropriate. Another Meathook attempt is countered with a spear but Miz gets up for a distraction, allowing Ryback to grab Shell Shock to retain at 7:14.
Charlotte vs. Brie Bella
Charlotte's time to beat is 3:21 because only PCB can win. Brie starts hiding in the ropes to start because she must “protect the Bella Empire.” A Figure Eight attempt doesn't work and Charlotte has less than two minutes to go. Instead Natural Selection hits out of nowhere for the pin at 1:40 to set Charlotte's time.
We look at the Dudleyz returning last week.
The Dudleyz say they're back for one more title reign because it would make then ten time Tag Team Champions. Tonight: New Day goes through a table.
Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens
Owens talks trash to start (shocking I know) and gets shoved down to the mat. A big boot stops Owens cold and Cesaro casually lifts him up for a suplex, complete with right hands to the gut. Cesaro gets two off a double stomp and it's time for Owens to bail to the floor. That's fine with Cesaro, who follows him out with a running European uppercut.
A high cross body gets two for Cesaro but Owens comes back with an elbow to the jaw and a backsplash. Owens: “WHERE'S YOUR SECTION NOW???” A corner clothesline sets up the Cannonball and we hit the chinlock on Cesaro. That goes nowhere so Owens busts out the torture rack neckbreaker for two instead and we take a break.
Back with Cesaro failing to superplex Owens so he dropkicks Kevin in the face and gutwrench superplexes him instead. That reverse Angle Slam gets two for Cesaro but Owens superkicks him for the same. Owens tells Cole to watch but misses another Cannonball.
Instead of doing something smart though, Kevin slaps him in the face. In a scary power display, Cesaro catches a tornado DDT in mid air and slams Owens down into a Crossface. Like, how do you even do that? Cesaro can't suplex him over the top and Owens knocks him HARD into the announcers' table. Back in and Cesaro can't Swing him because of the ribs, allowing the Pop Up Powerbomb to put Cesaro away at 16:10.
Ziggler tries to explain that he thought Summer was Lana. Nothing happened and he threw on a towel as soon as he knew who it was. Lana doesn't buy it and leaves.
Dean Ambrose vs. Braun Strowman
The fireflies still look awesome. Bray thanks Abigail for giving him the black sheep as her greatest gift. For thousands of years, mankind has tried to predict the end of the world. Tonight the seventh trumpet sounds and they will walk among you undisguised. Stroman, in a voice that Christian Bale would think is too over the top, says this is the apocalypse. Reigns comes out as backup as you would expect.
Strowman throws Dean around with one hand to start and I think the message has been sent. Dean gets in his fast striking but Stroman just throws him down again. A kick knocks Dean to the floor and the slow beating continues. Reigns finally comes over for the DQ at 3:09.
Stroman cleans house and no sells a chair to the back. Reigns' right hand has a bit more effect but Harper comes in with the superkick to put Roman down. Dean gets choked out and Reigns takes that spinning powerbomb thing. Bray comes in for Sister Abigail to Reigns. Notice that Bray didn't have to do a thing here, which is exactly why he needs minions.
We look at Rollins beating Cena at Summerslam.
Clip of Sting's opening promo.
Rollins wants his statue back and tells Sting to stay out of his business. Maybe if Sting had a subscription to the WWE Network, he could know how great Seth has been. Yeah HHH used to be a big deal, but HHH never held the US and WWE World Titles at the same time.
Paige vs. Sasha Banks
Paige has to beat 1:40 so she starts very fast and gets some rollups for two each. The fans are split as Paige fires off some running knees for two. The Rampaige connects but Tamina and Naomi pull Sasha to the floor as the clock runs out at 1:40.
Team Bella comes out to pose.
Summer Rae says that Ziggler called her into his locker room but then he just started stripping. She was mesmerized and speechless and then he asked her to join him in the shower. After he got out, he gave Summer the look but she ran out. Summer will never forget the image though.
Lana is crying and can't say anything.
New Day vs. Dudley Boyz
Non-title. Woods calls the Dudleyz a menace to culture, society and furniture around the world. Big E. asks if you remember the times sitting around the table with your granny and that weird uncle around the Thanksgiving table. Or all that money you cleaned up at the poker table. Or all those summers around the pool table. And where would we be without the Periodic Table? Remember all the fun you had learning your multiplication table? Big E. and Kofi pull out what Woods calls the last table (covered in bubble wrap) here tonight. A SAVE THE TABLES chant takes us to a break before the match.
The Prime Time Players are on commentary as Big E. and D-Von get things going. But it's quickly off to Bubba vs. Kofi. Woods suggests clapping but Bubba turns it into NEW DAY SUCKS. A clothesline under the arm stops Kofi cold and New Day is sent out to the floor as we take a break. Back with D-Von clotheslining both champions down but Woods low bridges him to the floor. As Woods brushes his hair, Big E. drives D-Von into the barricade. That sounds like a valid reason to dance to me and Big E. agrees.
The rotating stomps set up Big E.'s splash for two. An abdominal stretch slows things down and Kofi's chinlock does the same. Woods mocks the TABLES chant but Kofi dives into a clothesline, allowing for the tag off to Bubba. Bubba hiptosses Woods in but D-Von hiptosses him right back out in a funny spot. 3D quickly ends Kofi, which JBL calls the Dudleyz' first match in WWE in ten years. Even he doesn't watch Smackdown.
Here's Seth Rollins to call out Sting. The things Sting said earlier tonight showed him why WCW went out of business. We can't possibly be talking about that again.....right? Rollins wants Sting to take back what he said about HHH being that much better than him because Seth is every bit as good as HHH and one day could even be better. However, Rollins wants his status but gets Stephanie instead.
She suggests the Rollins chill out because Sting is getting in his head over a stupid statue. Rollins still wants his statue but this time gets John Cena. John talks about the Authority bending Rollins to their will because that's what they do. They picked Rollins because he was the only one willing to stab the Shield in the back. Rollins is going to be the flavor of the month because the Authority would never allow him to do what he's about to do right now.
Rollins has a lot of titles right now and since the Authority said every title is on the line at Night of Champions, Cena is cashing in his rematch for the US Title on the same night Rollins has to defend against Sting. Cena asks Stephanie if he can do that and she reluctantly agrees. Sting comes out to pose with Cena to end the show.
Results
Dolph Ziggler b. Rusev via DQ when Summer Rae interfered
Becky Lynch b. Alicia Fox – Disarm-Her
Ryback b. Big Show – Shell Shock
Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Natural Selection
Cesaro b. Kevin Owens – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Stroman b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered
Paige vs. Sasha Banks went to a time limit draw
Dudley Boyz b. New Day – 3D to Kingston
Tuesday
Jimmy Snuka has been charged with the 1983 murder of his girlfriend. No word yet on a trial.
Wednesday
NXT
Date: September 2, 2015
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Corey Graves
The focus goes back on the tag teams tonight as we begin the Dusty Classic. This is a tag team tournament for a prize to be announced and with most of the participants to be announced as well. The idea is to have the past, present and future of NXT involved to honor the spirit of Dusty Rhodes. Let's get to it.
The opening video hypes up the tournament and talks about paying tribute to the Dream.
Opening sequence.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Ascension vs. Rhyno/Baron Corbin
Rhyno runs Viktor over to start but Viktor rolls into a shoulder to put Rhyno down. Konor and Corbin come in but a quick double shoulder drops Baron. The double teaming doesn't last long though and Viktor is sent shoulder first into the post, allowing Rhyno to get some shots in. Back to Corbin as it seems the Ascension are the faces here. Konor gets the hot tag and cleans house on Baron before avoiding a Gore. Corbin breaks up the Fall of Man though and Rhyno Gores Konor for the pin at 5:39.
Neville and Solomon Crowe are in the tournament. They're both excited but Solomon freaks Neville out a bit.
Nia Jax is still coming.
Alexa Bliss vs. Blue Pants
Bliss takes Blue Pants down for a beating to start and throws her to the mat by the hair. Pants gets rammed into the buckle and a kick to the back sets up an armbar. Back up and Pants fires off some kicks and a northern lights suplex gets two. She misses a charge in the corner though and the Sparkle Splash gives Alexa the pin at 3:34.
Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa are in Regal's office when Tyler Breeze storms in. Tyler demands a spot in the tournament so Regal gives him Bull Dempsey to face Gargano and Ciampa next week.
Emma says the Divas Revolution isn't happening without her.
Apollo Crews vs. Martin Stone
Apollo starts fast with an armdrag but Stone clotheslines him down to take over. Off to a chinlock for a bit before Crews comes back with a standing enziguri. The gorilla press and standing moonsault put Stone away at 2:57. Crews looked good but he needs to do something besides just being all athletic and awesome.
Chad Gable and Jason Jordan say they'll get to write this tournament's history after winning the whole thing.* Neville is flying too close to the sun and Crowe is going to be forgotten.* Jordan finally says the Ready Willing and Gable line. Gable is money.
Finn Balor is ready to defend his title in Texas, but first of all he's in the Dusty Classic. His partner, Samoa Joe, comes in and says he wants to win it all. Balor shakes his hand and says he's ready. So I guess Joe is going to be the next major challenger.
Eva Marie vs. Billie Kay
We get an Eva chant to start, which I don't buy as legit for a second. Eva fires off some shoulders in the corner and grabs a suplex for two. A seated abdominal stretch is countered by a small package but Eva comes back with a backsplash (that's WAY too common a move these days) for two more. Kay makes a quick comeback with a clothesline and suplex for two of her own, but the interesting part is the fans booing Eva out of the building for kicking out. That was awesome in a way. Back up and Sliced Red #2 beats Kay at 3:45.
The Hype Bros and Enzo/Cass argued over what part of New York to celebrate in after winning last week.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic: Solomon Crowe/Neville vs. Chad Gable/Jason Jordan
Gable takes Crowe to the mat to start and easily rolls him around into a backslide for two. Back up and Crowe counters a leapfrog into a flapjack (nice move) before it's off to Neville for a very nice welcome home reaction. Jordan takes Neville down to the mat with some nice amateur stuff but Neville flips out of a suplex and sends Jason to the floor as we take a break. Back with Jordan throwing Solomon down just like he did to Neville before a wicked overhead belly to belly drops Crowe again.
Gable comes back in and mocks Solomon, even having Jordan fan him off while Crowe is on the floor. Jordan throws on a chinlock for a bit before Solomon adds a bow and arrow of his own. The hold is finally broken and Crowe dives over for the tag, allowing Neville to come in for his usual fast paced stuff.
Gable pulls Jason to the floor to break up the Red Arrow. That's fine with Neville as he dives on both of them with Crowe following with a dive of his own. Back in and Jordan catches Neville's next dive and throws him face first onto the mat. Crowe tags himself in and gets suplexed again, setting up the Grand Amplitude (the announcers don't know the name) for the pin at 12:48.
Results
Baron Corbin/Rhyno b. Ascension – Gore to Konor
Alexa Bliss b. Blue Pants – Sparkle Splash
Apollo Crews b. Martin Stone – Standing moonsault
Eva Marie b. Billie Kay – Sliced Red #2
Chad Gable/Jason Jordan b. Neville/Solomon Crowe – Grand Amplitude to Crowe
Impact Wrestling
Date: September 2, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
It's full on war now as the Global Force roster attacked several TNA wrestlers last week with Karen Jarrett revealing that she was behind the attacks on Drew Galloway and Bully Ray in recent weeks. In addition to the invasion, it's almost time for Bound For Glory, which really hasn't been set up yet. Let's get to it.
The Hardys and Ethan Carter III arrived earlier. Carter defends against Matt Hardy tonight and if he retains, Jeff Hardy is Carter's personal assistant.
We recap Karen Jarrett being revealed as the evil mastermind last week.
The Jarretts lead the GFW roster to the ring. Jeff talks (again) about returning on June 24 and being inducted into the Hall of Fame. He brags about all the success the GFW/TNA show had but Karen cuts him off to explain that she did everything for all the hard work her husband has put in for GFW. Yes she set these wheels in motion and had Chris Adonis take out Bully Ray. Jeff is building a new empire and no one in the back can compete with these boys. Adonis issues an open challenge to anyone in the back so here's Lashley.
Lashley vs. Chris Mordetzky
Lashley throws him down to start and then drops Chris with a clothesline. The Mordetzky Lock (full nelson) is quickly countered into a full nelson slam but Mordetzky nails a Polish Hammer (double ax handle to the chest) to take over. We hit the chinlock before they head outside with Lashley being sent into the steps. Back in and a butterfly suplex seems to annoy Lashley more than hurt him. A double clothesline puts both guys down and it's Lashley up first with a German suplex. The spear is countered into a spinebuster but Lashley easily blocks the full nelson. Now the spear connects but here's GFW for the DQ at 8:57.
Lashley gets destroyed so here are the Wolves for a failed save. Jeff says bring out the surprise so here she is with the Tag Team Title Feast or Fired briefcase. She says Magnus gave it to her, which apparently you can just do.
Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Brian Myers/Trevor Lee
Wait a minute because Earl Hebner won't do it, earning him a right hand from Jeff. Another referee is forced to ringside and the match is on. Trevor dropkicks Edwards down for two as this is actually a regular match for a change. Myers comes in for a slam of his own but the Wolves come back with stereo submission holds, only to break them up to go after Sonjay Dutt. Myers brings in a pipe but the distraction lets Lee blast Davey with the briefcase for the pin and the titles at 2:35. There's your token title win to make this invasion IMPORTANT.
Bobby Roode only cares about winning the King of the Mountain Title tonight.
Long recap of everything that just happened.
Ethan Carter III talks about his love of stories and how tonight, Matt's story of going for the World Title ends tonight.
King of the Mountain Title: PJ Black vs. Bobby Roode
Black is defending and Roode stops to brag about being a TNA original. This is TNA's house and Roode is bringing the title home. It's a brawl on the floor to start as Matthews mistakenly says Black won the title last week. They get inside for some chops but Black blocks a suplex and sends Roode outside for a suicide dive. A springboard clothesline drops Roode and we take a break. Back with Roode winning a slugout and getting two off a spinebuster.
The Roode Bomb is broken up and Gabriel gets two off a reverse DDT. Black's top rope Lionsault hits knees though and Roode slaps on the Crossface, only to have Dutt come out for a distraction. It doesn't work this time though as Roode puts the Crossface back on. Drew Galloway takes Dutt out and Black....is free because Roode let it go for no apparent reason. Black's springboard is countered into the Roode Bomb for the pin and the title at 13:15.
Post match GFW chases Roode off and Jeff rants about everything going on here. Cue Dixie and OH DEAR GOD SHUT UP! They're going back and forth about stabbing each other in the back and all the mistakes each other has made like ANYONE cares. Jeff brings up his ownership stake and Dixie proposes a winner take all match. Jeff agrees and Drew Galloway comes out to be on Dixie's team. Drew wants to stand up for TNA and the Wolves and Lashley come out to join him in Team TNA.
Dinero and Matthews talk about what just happened.
Here's the returning Kenny King with a mic in hand. He's been going through an identity crisis in the last year but now he's just here on his own. Kenny doesn't want to be the kind of guy who jumps someone from behind and uses a numbers advantage to beat someone down. He issues an open challenge to anyone from any roster to come fight him right now.
Bram vs. Kenny King
Bram goes right after King to start but Kenny takes him down with a nice dive. He tries it once too often though and eats a clothesline to give Bram control. King comes back with a running elbow in the corner, followed by an enziguri to put Bram in the corner. Bram ducks another dive though and the Brighter Side of Suffering gives Bram the pin at 3:37.
The Hardys say Matt will win the title. Has there been a more tacked on feud than this in recent years?
Here's Velvet Sky with something to say. She's been keeping to herself since she got back for a reason. The Knockouts division has been evolving constantly and so has she. The Dollhouse is out of control and Taryn is going to pay. Velvet tells Taryn to come out here but she comes up on screen to say how sick she is of being compared to Velvet as the hot blonde in TNA.
Taryn has been in movies and on TV but Velvet looks like a Hot Topic reject. This is Taryn's house and now she has to play with Taryn's dolls. Cue the Dollhouse, who quickly beats Tarn down. Angelina Love and Madison Rayne come out and yes, the Beautiful People are back.
Video on Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III in Full Metal Mayhem, which of course set up tonight's regular match.
Dixie gives Team TNA their pep talk. It's Lethal Lockdown in two weeks for full control.
TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III
Ethan is defending and if Matt loses, Jeff Hardy is Ethan's personal assistant. Josh: “EC3 and Matt Hardy have been rivals for quite some time.” No Josh, they haven't been. Feeling out process to start until Matt hits a running Diamond Cutter (called a neckbreaker) for two. A big clothesline puts the champion on the floor and it's off to a break. Back with Carter missing a middle rope elbow but putting on a sleeper.
Matt fights up and nails some clotheslines, followed by the Side Effect. The referee gets bumped off the Twist of Fate attempt though and there's no one to count. A belt shot to Matt's head gets two because Matt WILL NOT DIE, which seems to be code for WILL NOT STOP DRAGGING OUT OBVIOUS ENDINGS. Jeff gets in a cheap shot on Carter to give Matt two but they ram heads and Carter falls on top for two. Tyrus grabs Matt's leg and gets chaired by Jeff, only to have Ethan hit a TKO on Matt for two more. The referee gets distracted again and a low blow and sunset flip retain Carter's title at 13:17.
Jeff now has to work for Carter and is forced to raise the champ's hand to end the show.
Results
Lashley b. Chris Mordetzky via DQ when the GFW roster interfered
Brian Myers/Trevor Lee b. Wolves – Lee pinned Richards after a briefcase to the head
Bobby Roode b. PJ Black – Roode Bomb
Bram b. Kenny King – Brighter Side of Suffering
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – Sunset flip
Thursday
Smackdown
Date: September 3, 2015
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Jerry Lawler, Jimmy Uso
This seems like it's going to be another midcard heavy episode as the main event players, save for the champion, who is arguably the lowest of the three people involved in the story, who is known to slum it here on Smackdown. The only major event announced is Lana and Dolph Ziggler appearing on MizTV. Let's get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here's New Day to continue their SAVE THE TABLES campaign. Woods: “A table is a terrible thing to waste.” Kofi calls tables the backbone of human achievement and thinks we wouldn't be here without hard working tables. The pilgrims and Indians had the first Thanksgiving at a table. The Declaration of Independence was written on a table. Walter Cronkite announced the moon landing while sitting at a table. Above all that though: New Day signed their WWE contracts at a table. Kofi: “I remember that!”
The Dudleyz don't respect tables but we can all change that. A Save-The-Tables clap starts up but here are the Dudleyz to interrupt. We see a clip of Woods going through a table and Bubba says history is going to repeat itself. This brings out the Prime Time Players who say the Dudleyz have to earn their keep. You mean like by beating the champs a few days ago? Bubba says they're here to put people through tables and win championships. Titus has two tickets to send them back to Dudleyville and it's time for a match.
Dudley Boyz vs. Prime Time Players
New Day is on commentary and Woods wants to know why Titus wants to send the Dudleyz back to where they live. That's not a great gift. D-Von slams Young down and hits that twisting elbow to the jaw of his. A lot of trash is talked and it's time for a break. Back with Big E. doing his reporter voice as it's off to Bubba vs. Young. Woods only sees half of Bubba due to all the camoflauge and calls the Dudleyz table poachers. Soon New Day will have heavy heads because they'll be wearing the crown that makes them the greatest of all time.
The reverse 3D gets two on Young but he enziguris Bubba for a breather. New Day starts a SAVE THE TABLES dance as Titus comes in off the hot tag. Titus cleans house as Woods describes him as a German Sheppard that ate too many stale potato chips. Bubba elbows O'Neil in the jaw and it's 3D for the pin at 9:07.
Kofi slaps D-Von in the back of the head as New Day leaves.
Post break it's time for a New Day trombone dance party, but Renee Young tells them they're facing Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose tonight. Woods immediately plays a sad note on the trombone.
Stardust vs. Neville
No match as the Ascension of all people jump Neville during his entrance. Stardust says Neville is flying too close to the sun and the Ascension are the new conniving cohorts. The Fall of Man leaves Neville laying. Welcome to the Cosmic Wasteland. I heartily approve of this development.
Cesaro is talking about his match with Sheamus tonight when Sheamus interrupts. Tonight, Cesaro will be good but not good enough, just like always as he disappoints the Cesaro section one more time. Cesaro's big comeback: Sheamus does look stupid up close.
Sheamus vs. Cesaro
Cesaro has taped up ribs from going into the announcers' table on Monday. Sheamus bails to the floor to start and tells the fans that he doesn't look stupid. It's quickly back inside with Cesaro clotheslining him down and MESSING WITH THE MOHAWK. A suplex drops Sheamus with the ribs having no sign of injury whatsoever. Sheamus sends him hard into the corner though and the ribs are suddenly in agony as we go to a break. Back with Sheamus cranking on a chinlock with a knee in Cesaro's back.
They slug it out from their knees and Cesaro takes over with European uppercuts. A dropkick knocks Sheamus off the top and out to the floor as Lawler isn't sure how the ribs are holding up. Cesaro's big running European uppercut knocks Sheamus into the barricade and Cesaro gets two off a high cross body. So much for the selling. The Irish Curse sets up the Cloverleaf but Cesaro is out before it can go on full. The Crossface is countered by elbows to the ribs and it's a Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 10:36.
It's time for MizTV. This past Monday, Raw turned into Days of Our Lives with everything happening between Ziggler, Lana and Summer Rae. Oh and Rusev is in there too somewhere. We get a long recap package, meaning we see almost the entire thing. Miz's first guest tonight is Summer Rae, complete with her CALL TO ME CALL TO ME song. That's going to be stuck in my head all day now.
Summer calls Monday unfortunate but admits that there's more to the story. Monday night, Dolph kissed her. Miz: “HE KISSED YOU???” It quickly turned from passion to guilt because she already has the most amazing man in the world. This brings out Dolph and Lana with Ziggler making fun of Miz despite things being kind of serious.
Summer accuses Dolph of having something going on with her for months now and we see a clip of Summer kissing Dolph in June 2014, though it seemed to be more to tick off Fandango. Yeah remember Fandango? WWE doesn't either. Summer says they've been together at hotels as recently as last week and Lana goes after her. Lana storms off and Summer shouts that she can't handle the truth.
Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth
Dallas takes him into the corner and slams Truth down before driving knees into the head. Off to some chinlockery but Truth fights up and gets two off a side kick. That goes nowhere as Dallas drapes Truth's feet over the top rope and twist him down with a suplex spinning neckbreaker for the pin at 2:37.
Bo gives him another one post match and takes a victory lap.
We look back at Monday's Beat the Clock Challenge with Charlotte getting the Divas Title shot at Night of Champions.
Charlotte praises her teammates when the Bellas come up so Nikki can brag about the record. If there isn't at least a title defense before that night, this is going to reach an even lower level of stupid. Thankfully Charlotte says she's petitioned the Authority to have their match before the record is broken. If that is approved, the whole record comes crashing down. Tick tock Nikki.
Tamina vs. Charlotte
Tamina shoves Charlotte down to start but gets WOOed for her efforts. A test of strength goes nowhere so Tamina takes her head off with a clothesline for two. Charlotte comes back by kicking her in the face and a spear, followed by Natural Selection for the pin at 3:18.
Team Bella comes out to pose.
Long recap of the Cena/Rollins/Sting issues from Monday.
Kevin Owens brags about beating Cesaro twice in a row to silence the Cesaro Section. That brings him to the next people he wants to be quiet: the people who are critical of his weight. He isn't going to change his diet though. Instead, feed him more. That's about as good of an idea as there is for him right now.
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. New Day
Big E. and Kofi here and this is non-title. Ambrose and Kingston get things going with Kofi actually punching him into the New Day corner. Woods wants us to pay attention to the educated fists of one Big E. Reigns comes in for half of a double suplex on Big E. for two but gets sent down into the corner as well. It's time for some trombone playing, followed by a quickly broken chinlock. E. splashes him in the corner but eats a big clothesline, allowing the tag off to Ambrose.
Dean cleans house and feeds Kofi in to Reigns for a clothesline. New Day is knocked outside and Dean dives onto all three as we take a break. Back with Kofi kicking Dean in the chest and slapping on another chinlock. Woods: “I HAVE A TROMBONE!” The Big E. splash gets two but Dean avoids a charge in the corner. He blocks Big E.'s belly to belly superplex and hits a nice missile dropkick. The nip up doesn't work so well though in an unintentionally funny moment.
Reigns comes in to clean house and Jimmy is way too excited. Woods' distraction lets Kofi grab a rollup for two, earning him a big powerbomb for the same. Dean sends E. into the barricade as Kofi springboards into the Superman Punch, drawing in Xavier for the DQ at 12:07.
New Day gets their clocks cleaned (you never want a dirty clock) but Dean wants more. He wants another shot at Strowman and the Wyatt Family RIGHT NOW. Bray pops up on screen and says let's do this at Night of Champions. Can you hear the footsteps of the apocalypse walking among them in the form of a black sheep? Run.
Results
Dudley Boyz b. Prime Time Players – 3D to O'Neil
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Draping suplex neckbreaker
Charlotte b. Tamina – Natural Selection
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. New Day when Xavier Woods interfered
Friday
John Cena was dropped on his head at a house show. He was able to complete the match but left immediately.
Saturday
John Cena seems to be ok and isn't expected to miss any ring time.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Dolph Ziggler b. Rusev via DQ when Summer Rae interfered
Becky Lynch b. Alicia Fox – Disarm-Her
Ryback b. Big Show – Shell Shock
Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Natural Selection
Cesaro b. Kevin Owens – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Stroman b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered
Paige vs. Sasha Banks went to a time limit draw
Dudley Boyz b. New Day – 3D to Kingston
NXT
Baron Corbin/Rhyno b. Ascension – Gore to Konor
Alexa Bliss b. Blue Pants – Sparkle Splash
Apollo Crews b. Martin Stone – Standing moonsault
Eva Marie b. Billie Kay – Sliced Red #2
Chad Gable/Jason Jordan b. Neville/Solomon Crowe – Grand Amplitude to Crowe
Impact Wrestling
Lashley b. Chris Mordetzky via DQ when the GFW roster interfered
Brian Myers/Trevor Lee b. Wolves – Lee pinned Richards after a briefcase to the head
Bobby Roode b. PJ Black – Roode Bomb
Bram b. Kenny King – Brighter Side of Suffering
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – Sunset flip
Smackdown
Dudley Boyz b. Prime Time Players – 3D to O'Neil
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Draping suplex neckbreaker
Charlotte b. Tamina – Natural Selection
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. New Day when Xavier Woods interfered
Bram has been arrested for domestic battery. His wife, WWE Diva Charlotte, was not involved.
A person was shot outside the WWE Performance Center. The man was carrying a knife and had been banned from WWE property in the past.
Monday Night Raw
Date: August 31, 2015
Location: Amalie Arena, Tampa, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield
Last week saw the return of Sting and the disappearance of a statue, meaning tonight is likely to continue the time honored tradition of destroying that statue once and for all. Sting vs. Seth Rollins for the WWE World Title is confirmed for Night of Champions, but what about Rollins' US Title? John Cena is still lurking so let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's closing segment where Sting appeared in the statue's place. HHH made the match after the show went off the air.
Opening sequence.
Here's Sting (with complete face paint this week) to open things up. JBL: “The man who put Starrcade on the map!” Just....no. Under no circumstances can that be considered correct. Sting hasn't been around much since Wrestlemania where he lost to HHH. Due to that match, he'll always have respect for HHH, but now his sights are set on Seth Rollins.
Ever since Wrestlemania it has been injustice after injustice and last week he had to hear Seth Rollins comparing himself to names like Bruno Sammartino, Andre the Giant and the Ultimate Warrior. Sting has won titles around the world but there is one that has eluded him throughout his career. At Night of Champions, Sting is going to prove that Rollins isn't half the man HHH is and that Rollins can't hang with Sting on his best day.
Rollins is upset but Stephanie talks him down. Seth lists his accomplishments this year and calls everything Sting said wrong. Stephanie brings up Sting's comparison to HHH and thinks Sting is absolutely right. Seth wants his statue so Stephanie suggests he go ask Sting.
Rusev vs. Dolph Ziggler
An attempt at a single leg doesn't get Dolph anywhere so he dropkicks Rusev in the face instead. Back in and Rusev slowly stomps Ziggler down, as is his custom. We get a dueling Rusev chant, followed by Dolph missing a splash in the corner. The sleeper slows Rusev down a bit so he backs Ziggler into the corner for a break. Ziggler gets knocked into the barricade and we take a break.
Back with Rusev throwing on a bearhug, which really should have been put on during the break. Rusev misses a charge of his own but easily breaks up a neckbreaker with a suplex. A running flip backsplash gets two more and Ziggler is in trouble. The spinwheel kick gets the same for Rusev but he walks into a superkick out of nowhere.
They head outside with Rusev charging into the steps but both guys dive in to beat the count at nine. Rusev superkicks him down as well because everyone has to use superkicks in this company. Ziggler sneaks out of the Accolade and a quick Zig Zag drops Rusev, only to have Summer come in for the DQ at 14:21.
A catfight ensues until Ziggler pulls them apart.
Post break Ziggler brags about what just happened. He goes into a room as Renee talks a bit and we see Summer sneak in behind him.
It's time for the Beat the Clock Challenge for the #1 contendership to the Divas Title, but Team Bella has something to say. Nikki is so proud of making it this far, but we've got a Bellatron counting us down to the second she breaks the record.
Alicia Fox vs. Becky Lynch
This is the first match in a Beat the Clock Challenge, meaning whoever wins in the shortest time wins, earning a title shot, presumably at Night of Champions. Becky tries for some fast rollups to start but she gets a bit sloppy and Fox takes over. A chinlock slows things down even more and you can see Becky panicking over the time being spent. Back up and some clotheslines get two for Lynch, followed by a springboard kick in the corner. They hit the mat and Becky grabs Disarm-Her for the win at 3:21.
Ryback talks about defending his title against everyone and tonight the Big Show will be no different. As he's talking, we hear someone scream and see Summer Rae running out of Ziggler's locker room. Ziggler is in a towel and looks surprised.
Intercontinental Title: Big Show vs. Ryback
Big Show is challenging, Miz is on commentary and we get big match intros. Show takes him into the corner for the loud chop to start and slowly drops an elbow for a close two. With Ryback down, Show demands a microphone so he can address the PLEASE RETIRE chants. He says find someone to do it so Ryback picks him up for a slam, only to have Show fall on him for two more. Show hits the chinlock for a few moments but Ryback fights up and hits a good looking flying tackle.
The splash is caught by the throat though, only have Ryback slip out and hook a double leg takedown (no that wasn't a spinebuster) for a near fall of his own. The Meathook is countered into the chokeslam for two but Show goes up. Since we're in Flair Country, the slam off the top is very appropriate. Another Meathook attempt is countered with a spear but Miz gets up for a distraction, allowing Ryback to grab Shell Shock to retain at 7:14.
Charlotte vs. Brie Bella
Charlotte's time to beat is 3:21 because only PCB can win. Brie starts hiding in the ropes to start because she must “protect the Bella Empire.” A Figure Eight attempt doesn't work and Charlotte has less than two minutes to go. Instead Natural Selection hits out of nowhere for the pin at 1:40 to set Charlotte's time.
We look at the Dudleyz returning last week.
The Dudleyz say they're back for one more title reign because it would make then ten time Tag Team Champions. Tonight: New Day goes through a table.
Cesaro vs. Kevin Owens
Owens talks trash to start (shocking I know) and gets shoved down to the mat. A big boot stops Owens cold and Cesaro casually lifts him up for a suplex, complete with right hands to the gut. Cesaro gets two off a double stomp and it's time for Owens to bail to the floor. That's fine with Cesaro, who follows him out with a running European uppercut.
A high cross body gets two for Cesaro but Owens comes back with an elbow to the jaw and a backsplash. Owens: “WHERE'S YOUR SECTION NOW???” A corner clothesline sets up the Cannonball and we hit the chinlock on Cesaro. That goes nowhere so Owens busts out the torture rack neckbreaker for two instead and we take a break.
Back with Cesaro failing to superplex Owens so he dropkicks Kevin in the face and gutwrench superplexes him instead. That reverse Angle Slam gets two for Cesaro but Owens superkicks him for the same. Owens tells Cole to watch but misses another Cannonball.
Instead of doing something smart though, Kevin slaps him in the face. In a scary power display, Cesaro catches a tornado DDT in mid air and slams Owens down into a Crossface. Like, how do you even do that? Cesaro can't suplex him over the top and Owens knocks him HARD into the announcers' table. Back in and Cesaro can't Swing him because of the ribs, allowing the Pop Up Powerbomb to put Cesaro away at 16:10.
Ziggler tries to explain that he thought Summer was Lana. Nothing happened and he threw on a towel as soon as he knew who it was. Lana doesn't buy it and leaves.
Dean Ambrose vs. Braun Strowman
The fireflies still look awesome. Bray thanks Abigail for giving him the black sheep as her greatest gift. For thousands of years, mankind has tried to predict the end of the world. Tonight the seventh trumpet sounds and they will walk among you undisguised. Stroman, in a voice that Christian Bale would think is too over the top, says this is the apocalypse. Reigns comes out as backup as you would expect.
Strowman throws Dean around with one hand to start and I think the message has been sent. Dean gets in his fast striking but Stroman just throws him down again. A kick knocks Dean to the floor and the slow beating continues. Reigns finally comes over for the DQ at 3:09.
Stroman cleans house and no sells a chair to the back. Reigns' right hand has a bit more effect but Harper comes in with the superkick to put Roman down. Dean gets choked out and Reigns takes that spinning powerbomb thing. Bray comes in for Sister Abigail to Reigns. Notice that Bray didn't have to do a thing here, which is exactly why he needs minions.
We look at Rollins beating Cena at Summerslam.
Clip of Sting's opening promo.
Rollins wants his statue back and tells Sting to stay out of his business. Maybe if Sting had a subscription to the WWE Network, he could know how great Seth has been. Yeah HHH used to be a big deal, but HHH never held the US and WWE World Titles at the same time.
Paige vs. Sasha Banks
Paige has to beat 1:40 so she starts very fast and gets some rollups for two each. The fans are split as Paige fires off some running knees for two. The Rampaige connects but Tamina and Naomi pull Sasha to the floor as the clock runs out at 1:40.
Team Bella comes out to pose.
Summer Rae says that Ziggler called her into his locker room but then he just started stripping. She was mesmerized and speechless and then he asked her to join him in the shower. After he got out, he gave Summer the look but she ran out. Summer will never forget the image though.
Lana is crying and can't say anything.
New Day vs. Dudley Boyz
Non-title. Woods calls the Dudleyz a menace to culture, society and furniture around the world. Big E. asks if you remember the times sitting around the table with your granny and that weird uncle around the Thanksgiving table. Or all that money you cleaned up at the poker table. Or all those summers around the pool table. And where would we be without the Periodic Table? Remember all the fun you had learning your multiplication table? Big E. and Kofi pull out what Woods calls the last table (covered in bubble wrap) here tonight. A SAVE THE TABLES chant takes us to a break before the match.
The Prime Time Players are on commentary as Big E. and D-Von get things going. But it's quickly off to Bubba vs. Kofi. Woods suggests clapping but Bubba turns it into NEW DAY SUCKS. A clothesline under the arm stops Kofi cold and New Day is sent out to the floor as we take a break. Back with D-Von clotheslining both champions down but Woods low bridges him to the floor. As Woods brushes his hair, Big E. drives D-Von into the barricade. That sounds like a valid reason to dance to me and Big E. agrees.
The rotating stomps set up Big E.'s splash for two. An abdominal stretch slows things down and Kofi's chinlock does the same. Woods mocks the TABLES chant but Kofi dives into a clothesline, allowing for the tag off to Bubba. Bubba hiptosses Woods in but D-Von hiptosses him right back out in a funny spot. 3D quickly ends Kofi, which JBL calls the Dudleyz' first match in WWE in ten years. Even he doesn't watch Smackdown.
Here's Seth Rollins to call out Sting. The things Sting said earlier tonight showed him why WCW went out of business. We can't possibly be talking about that again.....right? Rollins wants Sting to take back what he said about HHH being that much better than him because Seth is every bit as good as HHH and one day could even be better. However, Rollins wants his status but gets Stephanie instead.
She suggests the Rollins chill out because Sting is getting in his head over a stupid statue. Rollins still wants his statue but this time gets John Cena. John talks about the Authority bending Rollins to their will because that's what they do. They picked Rollins because he was the only one willing to stab the Shield in the back. Rollins is going to be the flavor of the month because the Authority would never allow him to do what he's about to do right now.
Rollins has a lot of titles right now and since the Authority said every title is on the line at Night of Champions, Cena is cashing in his rematch for the US Title on the same night Rollins has to defend against Sting. Cena asks Stephanie if he can do that and she reluctantly agrees. Sting comes out to pose with Cena to end the show.
Results
Dolph Ziggler b. Rusev via DQ when Summer Rae interfered
Becky Lynch b. Alicia Fox – Disarm-Her
Ryback b. Big Show – Shell Shock
Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Natural Selection
Cesaro b. Kevin Owens – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Stroman b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered
Paige vs. Sasha Banks went to a time limit draw
Dudley Boyz b. New Day – 3D to Kingston
Tuesday
Jimmy Snuka has been charged with the 1983 murder of his girlfriend. No word yet on a trial.
Wednesday
NXT
Date: September 2, 2015
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Corey Graves
The focus goes back on the tag teams tonight as we begin the Dusty Classic. This is a tag team tournament for a prize to be announced and with most of the participants to be announced as well. The idea is to have the past, present and future of NXT involved to honor the spirit of Dusty Rhodes. Let's get to it.
The opening video hypes up the tournament and talks about paying tribute to the Dream.
Opening sequence.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Ascension vs. Rhyno/Baron Corbin
Rhyno runs Viktor over to start but Viktor rolls into a shoulder to put Rhyno down. Konor and Corbin come in but a quick double shoulder drops Baron. The double teaming doesn't last long though and Viktor is sent shoulder first into the post, allowing Rhyno to get some shots in. Back to Corbin as it seems the Ascension are the faces here. Konor gets the hot tag and cleans house on Baron before avoiding a Gore. Corbin breaks up the Fall of Man though and Rhyno Gores Konor for the pin at 5:39.
Neville and Solomon Crowe are in the tournament. They're both excited but Solomon freaks Neville out a bit.
Nia Jax is still coming.
Alexa Bliss vs. Blue Pants
Bliss takes Blue Pants down for a beating to start and throws her to the mat by the hair. Pants gets rammed into the buckle and a kick to the back sets up an armbar. Back up and Pants fires off some kicks and a northern lights suplex gets two. She misses a charge in the corner though and the Sparkle Splash gives Alexa the pin at 3:34.
Johnny Gargano and Tommaso Ciampa are in Regal's office when Tyler Breeze storms in. Tyler demands a spot in the tournament so Regal gives him Bull Dempsey to face Gargano and Ciampa next week.
Emma says the Divas Revolution isn't happening without her.
Apollo Crews vs. Martin Stone
Apollo starts fast with an armdrag but Stone clotheslines him down to take over. Off to a chinlock for a bit before Crews comes back with a standing enziguri. The gorilla press and standing moonsault put Stone away at 2:57. Crews looked good but he needs to do something besides just being all athletic and awesome.
Chad Gable and Jason Jordan say they'll get to write this tournament's history after winning the whole thing.* Neville is flying too close to the sun and Crowe is going to be forgotten.* Jordan finally says the Ready Willing and Gable line. Gable is money.
Finn Balor is ready to defend his title in Texas, but first of all he's in the Dusty Classic. His partner, Samoa Joe, comes in and says he wants to win it all. Balor shakes his hand and says he's ready. So I guess Joe is going to be the next major challenger.
Eva Marie vs. Billie Kay
We get an Eva chant to start, which I don't buy as legit for a second. Eva fires off some shoulders in the corner and grabs a suplex for two. A seated abdominal stretch is countered by a small package but Eva comes back with a backsplash (that's WAY too common a move these days) for two more. Kay makes a quick comeback with a clothesline and suplex for two of her own, but the interesting part is the fans booing Eva out of the building for kicking out. That was awesome in a way. Back up and Sliced Red #2 beats Kay at 3:45.
The Hype Bros and Enzo/Cass argued over what part of New York to celebrate in after winning last week.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic: Solomon Crowe/Neville vs. Chad Gable/Jason Jordan
Gable takes Crowe to the mat to start and easily rolls him around into a backslide for two. Back up and Crowe counters a leapfrog into a flapjack (nice move) before it's off to Neville for a very nice welcome home reaction. Jordan takes Neville down to the mat with some nice amateur stuff but Neville flips out of a suplex and sends Jason to the floor as we take a break. Back with Jordan throwing Solomon down just like he did to Neville before a wicked overhead belly to belly drops Crowe again.
Gable comes back in and mocks Solomon, even having Jordan fan him off while Crowe is on the floor. Jordan throws on a chinlock for a bit before Solomon adds a bow and arrow of his own. The hold is finally broken and Crowe dives over for the tag, allowing Neville to come in for his usual fast paced stuff.
Gable pulls Jason to the floor to break up the Red Arrow. That's fine with Neville as he dives on both of them with Crowe following with a dive of his own. Back in and Jordan catches Neville's next dive and throws him face first onto the mat. Crowe tags himself in and gets suplexed again, setting up the Grand Amplitude (the announcers don't know the name) for the pin at 12:48.
Results
Baron Corbin/Rhyno b. Ascension – Gore to Konor
Alexa Bliss b. Blue Pants – Sparkle Splash
Apollo Crews b. Martin Stone – Standing moonsault
Eva Marie b. Billie Kay – Sliced Red #2
Chad Gable/Jason Jordan b. Neville/Solomon Crowe – Grand Amplitude to Crowe
Impact Wrestling
Date: September 2, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D'Angelo Dinero
It's full on war now as the Global Force roster attacked several TNA wrestlers last week with Karen Jarrett revealing that she was behind the attacks on Drew Galloway and Bully Ray in recent weeks. In addition to the invasion, it's almost time for Bound For Glory, which really hasn't been set up yet. Let's get to it.
The Hardys and Ethan Carter III arrived earlier. Carter defends against Matt Hardy tonight and if he retains, Jeff Hardy is Carter's personal assistant.
We recap Karen Jarrett being revealed as the evil mastermind last week.
The Jarretts lead the GFW roster to the ring. Jeff talks (again) about returning on June 24 and being inducted into the Hall of Fame. He brags about all the success the GFW/TNA show had but Karen cuts him off to explain that she did everything for all the hard work her husband has put in for GFW. Yes she set these wheels in motion and had Chris Adonis take out Bully Ray. Jeff is building a new empire and no one in the back can compete with these boys. Adonis issues an open challenge to anyone in the back so here's Lashley.
Lashley vs. Chris Mordetzky
Lashley throws him down to start and then drops Chris with a clothesline. The Mordetzky Lock (full nelson) is quickly countered into a full nelson slam but Mordetzky nails a Polish Hammer (double ax handle to the chest) to take over. We hit the chinlock before they head outside with Lashley being sent into the steps. Back in and a butterfly suplex seems to annoy Lashley more than hurt him. A double clothesline puts both guys down and it's Lashley up first with a German suplex. The spear is countered into a spinebuster but Lashley easily blocks the full nelson. Now the spear connects but here's GFW for the DQ at 8:57.
Lashley gets destroyed so here are the Wolves for a failed save. Jeff says bring out the surprise so here she is with the Tag Team Title Feast or Fired briefcase. She says Magnus gave it to her, which apparently you can just do.
Tag Team Titles: Wolves vs. Brian Myers/Trevor Lee
Wait a minute because Earl Hebner won't do it, earning him a right hand from Jeff. Another referee is forced to ringside and the match is on. Trevor dropkicks Edwards down for two as this is actually a regular match for a change. Myers comes in for a slam of his own but the Wolves come back with stereo submission holds, only to break them up to go after Sonjay Dutt. Myers brings in a pipe but the distraction lets Lee blast Davey with the briefcase for the pin and the titles at 2:35. There's your token title win to make this invasion IMPORTANT.
Bobby Roode only cares about winning the King of the Mountain Title tonight.
Long recap of everything that just happened.
Ethan Carter III talks about his love of stories and how tonight, Matt's story of going for the World Title ends tonight.
King of the Mountain Title: PJ Black vs. Bobby Roode
Black is defending and Roode stops to brag about being a TNA original. This is TNA's house and Roode is bringing the title home. It's a brawl on the floor to start as Matthews mistakenly says Black won the title last week. They get inside for some chops but Black blocks a suplex and sends Roode outside for a suicide dive. A springboard clothesline drops Roode and we take a break. Back with Roode winning a slugout and getting two off a spinebuster.
The Roode Bomb is broken up and Gabriel gets two off a reverse DDT. Black's top rope Lionsault hits knees though and Roode slaps on the Crossface, only to have Dutt come out for a distraction. It doesn't work this time though as Roode puts the Crossface back on. Drew Galloway takes Dutt out and Black....is free because Roode let it go for no apparent reason. Black's springboard is countered into the Roode Bomb for the pin and the title at 13:15.
Post match GFW chases Roode off and Jeff rants about everything going on here. Cue Dixie and OH DEAR GOD SHUT UP! They're going back and forth about stabbing each other in the back and all the mistakes each other has made like ANYONE cares. Jeff brings up his ownership stake and Dixie proposes a winner take all match. Jeff agrees and Drew Galloway comes out to be on Dixie's team. Drew wants to stand up for TNA and the Wolves and Lashley come out to join him in Team TNA.
Dinero and Matthews talk about what just happened.
Here's the returning Kenny King with a mic in hand. He's been going through an identity crisis in the last year but now he's just here on his own. Kenny doesn't want to be the kind of guy who jumps someone from behind and uses a numbers advantage to beat someone down. He issues an open challenge to anyone from any roster to come fight him right now.
Bram vs. Kenny King
Bram goes right after King to start but Kenny takes him down with a nice dive. He tries it once too often though and eats a clothesline to give Bram control. King comes back with a running elbow in the corner, followed by an enziguri to put Bram in the corner. Bram ducks another dive though and the Brighter Side of Suffering gives Bram the pin at 3:37.
The Hardys say Matt will win the title. Has there been a more tacked on feud than this in recent years?
Here's Velvet Sky with something to say. She's been keeping to herself since she got back for a reason. The Knockouts division has been evolving constantly and so has she. The Dollhouse is out of control and Taryn is going to pay. Velvet tells Taryn to come out here but she comes up on screen to say how sick she is of being compared to Velvet as the hot blonde in TNA.
Taryn has been in movies and on TV but Velvet looks like a Hot Topic reject. This is Taryn's house and now she has to play with Taryn's dolls. Cue the Dollhouse, who quickly beats Tarn down. Angelina Love and Madison Rayne come out and yes, the Beautiful People are back.
Video on Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III in Full Metal Mayhem, which of course set up tonight's regular match.
Dixie gives Team TNA their pep talk. It's Lethal Lockdown in two weeks for full control.
TNA World Title: Matt Hardy vs. Ethan Carter III
Ethan is defending and if Matt loses, Jeff Hardy is Ethan's personal assistant. Josh: “EC3 and Matt Hardy have been rivals for quite some time.” No Josh, they haven't been. Feeling out process to start until Matt hits a running Diamond Cutter (called a neckbreaker) for two. A big clothesline puts the champion on the floor and it's off to a break. Back with Carter missing a middle rope elbow but putting on a sleeper.
Matt fights up and nails some clotheslines, followed by the Side Effect. The referee gets bumped off the Twist of Fate attempt though and there's no one to count. A belt shot to Matt's head gets two because Matt WILL NOT DIE, which seems to be code for WILL NOT STOP DRAGGING OUT OBVIOUS ENDINGS. Jeff gets in a cheap shot on Carter to give Matt two but they ram heads and Carter falls on top for two. Tyrus grabs Matt's leg and gets chaired by Jeff, only to have Ethan hit a TKO on Matt for two more. The referee gets distracted again and a low blow and sunset flip retain Carter's title at 13:17.
Jeff now has to work for Carter and is forced to raise the champ's hand to end the show.
Results
Lashley b. Chris Mordetzky via DQ when the GFW roster interfered
Brian Myers/Trevor Lee b. Wolves – Lee pinned Richards after a briefcase to the head
Bobby Roode b. PJ Black – Roode Bomb
Bram b. Kenny King – Brighter Side of Suffering
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – Sunset flip
Thursday
Smackdown
Date: September 3, 2015
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Rich Brennan, Jerry Lawler, Jimmy Uso
This seems like it's going to be another midcard heavy episode as the main event players, save for the champion, who is arguably the lowest of the three people involved in the story, who is known to slum it here on Smackdown. The only major event announced is Lana and Dolph Ziggler appearing on MizTV. Let's get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here's New Day to continue their SAVE THE TABLES campaign. Woods: “A table is a terrible thing to waste.” Kofi calls tables the backbone of human achievement and thinks we wouldn't be here without hard working tables. The pilgrims and Indians had the first Thanksgiving at a table. The Declaration of Independence was written on a table. Walter Cronkite announced the moon landing while sitting at a table. Above all that though: New Day signed their WWE contracts at a table. Kofi: “I remember that!”
The Dudleyz don't respect tables but we can all change that. A Save-The-Tables clap starts up but here are the Dudleyz to interrupt. We see a clip of Woods going through a table and Bubba says history is going to repeat itself. This brings out the Prime Time Players who say the Dudleyz have to earn their keep. You mean like by beating the champs a few days ago? Bubba says they're here to put people through tables and win championships. Titus has two tickets to send them back to Dudleyville and it's time for a match.
Dudley Boyz vs. Prime Time Players
New Day is on commentary and Woods wants to know why Titus wants to send the Dudleyz back to where they live. That's not a great gift. D-Von slams Young down and hits that twisting elbow to the jaw of his. A lot of trash is talked and it's time for a break. Back with Big E. doing his reporter voice as it's off to Bubba vs. Young. Woods only sees half of Bubba due to all the camoflauge and calls the Dudleyz table poachers. Soon New Day will have heavy heads because they'll be wearing the crown that makes them the greatest of all time.
The reverse 3D gets two on Young but he enziguris Bubba for a breather. New Day starts a SAVE THE TABLES dance as Titus comes in off the hot tag. Titus cleans house as Woods describes him as a German Sheppard that ate too many stale potato chips. Bubba elbows O'Neil in the jaw and it's 3D for the pin at 9:07.
Kofi slaps D-Von in the back of the head as New Day leaves.
Post break it's time for a New Day trombone dance party, but Renee Young tells them they're facing Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose tonight. Woods immediately plays a sad note on the trombone.
Stardust vs. Neville
No match as the Ascension of all people jump Neville during his entrance. Stardust says Neville is flying too close to the sun and the Ascension are the new conniving cohorts. The Fall of Man leaves Neville laying. Welcome to the Cosmic Wasteland. I heartily approve of this development.
Cesaro is talking about his match with Sheamus tonight when Sheamus interrupts. Tonight, Cesaro will be good but not good enough, just like always as he disappoints the Cesaro section one more time. Cesaro's big comeback: Sheamus does look stupid up close.
Sheamus vs. Cesaro
Cesaro has taped up ribs from going into the announcers' table on Monday. Sheamus bails to the floor to start and tells the fans that he doesn't look stupid. It's quickly back inside with Cesaro clotheslining him down and MESSING WITH THE MOHAWK. A suplex drops Sheamus with the ribs having no sign of injury whatsoever. Sheamus sends him hard into the corner though and the ribs are suddenly in agony as we go to a break. Back with Sheamus cranking on a chinlock with a knee in Cesaro's back.
They slug it out from their knees and Cesaro takes over with European uppercuts. A dropkick knocks Sheamus off the top and out to the floor as Lawler isn't sure how the ribs are holding up. Cesaro's big running European uppercut knocks Sheamus into the barricade and Cesaro gets two off a high cross body. So much for the selling. The Irish Curse sets up the Cloverleaf but Cesaro is out before it can go on full. The Crossface is countered by elbows to the ribs and it's a Brogue Kick to give Sheamus the pin at 10:36.
It's time for MizTV. This past Monday, Raw turned into Days of Our Lives with everything happening between Ziggler, Lana and Summer Rae. Oh and Rusev is in there too somewhere. We get a long recap package, meaning we see almost the entire thing. Miz's first guest tonight is Summer Rae, complete with her CALL TO ME CALL TO ME song. That's going to be stuck in my head all day now.
Summer calls Monday unfortunate but admits that there's more to the story. Monday night, Dolph kissed her. Miz: “HE KISSED YOU???” It quickly turned from passion to guilt because she already has the most amazing man in the world. This brings out Dolph and Lana with Ziggler making fun of Miz despite things being kind of serious.
Summer accuses Dolph of having something going on with her for months now and we see a clip of Summer kissing Dolph in June 2014, though it seemed to be more to tick off Fandango. Yeah remember Fandango? WWE doesn't either. Summer says they've been together at hotels as recently as last week and Lana goes after her. Lana storms off and Summer shouts that she can't handle the truth.
Bo Dallas vs. R-Truth
Dallas takes him into the corner and slams Truth down before driving knees into the head. Off to some chinlockery but Truth fights up and gets two off a side kick. That goes nowhere as Dallas drapes Truth's feet over the top rope and twist him down with a suplex spinning neckbreaker for the pin at 2:37.
Bo gives him another one post match and takes a victory lap.
We look back at Monday's Beat the Clock Challenge with Charlotte getting the Divas Title shot at Night of Champions.
Charlotte praises her teammates when the Bellas come up so Nikki can brag about the record. If there isn't at least a title defense before that night, this is going to reach an even lower level of stupid. Thankfully Charlotte says she's petitioned the Authority to have their match before the record is broken. If that is approved, the whole record comes crashing down. Tick tock Nikki.
Tamina vs. Charlotte
Tamina shoves Charlotte down to start but gets WOOed for her efforts. A test of strength goes nowhere so Tamina takes her head off with a clothesline for two. Charlotte comes back by kicking her in the face and a spear, followed by Natural Selection for the pin at 3:18.
Team Bella comes out to pose.
Long recap of the Cena/Rollins/Sting issues from Monday.
Kevin Owens brags about beating Cesaro twice in a row to silence the Cesaro Section. That brings him to the next people he wants to be quiet: the people who are critical of his weight. He isn't going to change his diet though. Instead, feed him more. That's about as good of an idea as there is for him right now.
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose vs. New Day
Big E. and Kofi here and this is non-title. Ambrose and Kingston get things going with Kofi actually punching him into the New Day corner. Woods wants us to pay attention to the educated fists of one Big E. Reigns comes in for half of a double suplex on Big E. for two but gets sent down into the corner as well. It's time for some trombone playing, followed by a quickly broken chinlock. E. splashes him in the corner but eats a big clothesline, allowing the tag off to Ambrose.
Dean cleans house and feeds Kofi in to Reigns for a clothesline. New Day is knocked outside and Dean dives onto all three as we take a break. Back with Kofi kicking Dean in the chest and slapping on another chinlock. Woods: “I HAVE A TROMBONE!” The Big E. splash gets two but Dean avoids a charge in the corner. He blocks Big E.'s belly to belly superplex and hits a nice missile dropkick. The nip up doesn't work so well though in an unintentionally funny moment.
Reigns comes in to clean house and Jimmy is way too excited. Woods' distraction lets Kofi grab a rollup for two, earning him a big powerbomb for the same. Dean sends E. into the barricade as Kofi springboards into the Superman Punch, drawing in Xavier for the DQ at 12:07.
New Day gets their clocks cleaned (you never want a dirty clock) but Dean wants more. He wants another shot at Strowman and the Wyatt Family RIGHT NOW. Bray pops up on screen and says let's do this at Night of Champions. Can you hear the footsteps of the apocalypse walking among them in the form of a black sheep? Run.
Results
Dudley Boyz b. Prime Time Players – 3D to O'Neil
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Draping suplex neckbreaker
Charlotte b. Tamina – Natural Selection
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. New Day when Xavier Woods interfered
Friday
John Cena was dropped on his head at a house show. He was able to complete the match but left immediately.
Saturday
John Cena seems to be ok and isn't expected to miss any ring time.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Dolph Ziggler b. Rusev via DQ when Summer Rae interfered
Becky Lynch b. Alicia Fox – Disarm-Her
Ryback b. Big Show – Shell Shock
Charlotte b. Brie Bella – Natural Selection
Cesaro b. Kevin Owens – Pop Up Powerbomb
Braun Stroman b. Dean Ambrose via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered
Paige vs. Sasha Banks went to a time limit draw
Dudley Boyz b. New Day – 3D to Kingston
NXT
Baron Corbin/Rhyno b. Ascension – Gore to Konor
Alexa Bliss b. Blue Pants – Sparkle Splash
Apollo Crews b. Martin Stone – Standing moonsault
Eva Marie b. Billie Kay – Sliced Red #2
Chad Gable/Jason Jordan b. Neville/Solomon Crowe – Grand Amplitude to Crowe
Impact Wrestling
Lashley b. Chris Mordetzky via DQ when the GFW roster interfered
Brian Myers/Trevor Lee b. Wolves – Lee pinned Richards after a briefcase to the head
Bobby Roode b. PJ Black – Roode Bomb
Bram b. Kenny King – Brighter Side of Suffering
Ethan Carter III b. Matt Hardy – Sunset flip
Smackdown
Dudley Boyz b. Prime Time Players – 3D to O'Neil
Sheamus b. Cesaro – Brogue Kick
Bo Dallas b. R-Truth – Draping suplex neckbreaker
Charlotte b. Tamina – Natural Selection
Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. New Day when Xavier Woods interfered