klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Monday Night Raw
Date: August 27, 2012
Location: Bradley Arena, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
The focus tonight is going to be on Punk, at least in theory. He attacked Lawler last week which will probably set up a match between the two of them because the WWE solution to a heel turn that isn't quit clicking is always to beat up the King. Also we need to find out if Cena vs. Punk III is going to happen, which I think you already know the answer to. Let's get to it.
We open with the standard recap from Summerslam and last week.
Cole does the usual opening to the show but Lawler gets in the ring. He says that at the end of Raw 1000, he said something that Punk took offense to, and last week Punk kicked him in the head for it. Now Lawler wants an apology so he calls out Punk. Here's the champ who isn't pleased. Punk actually does say he's sorry, but he doesn't get how beating up a bunch of nobodies from Memphis makes you a Hall of Famer.
Punk runs down Lawler's career and focuses on his time on commentary. After all those years, Lawler got a Wrestlemania moment and he couldn't even beat Michael Cole. Lawler gets angry and Punk wants to know if Lawler wants a fight. Lawler says no but Punk keeps pushing it. Punk leaves and Lawler says he'll think about it.
Jack Swagger vs. Ryback
Ryback takes him down almost immediately and slams Swagger's head into the mat over and over. A charge misses though and Swagger shoulder blocks Ryback down. Vader Bomb hits feet but Swagger counters into an ankle lock attempt. Ryback escapes and pounds him in the corner. A BADLY botched backdrop results in Swagger being dropped on his head ala Sabu vs. Benoit in ECW. The clothesline sets up Shell Shock for the pin at 2:12.
Swagger says that's it and yells a lot.
Lawler is still thinking about fighting Punk.
Natalya vs. Layla
Before the match, Vickie comes out and says to hurry the match up because she has something to say. Layla speeds things up to start and hits some nice athletic stuff, including a few rollups and a springboard cross body for two. Natalya kicks her to the floor and ties Layla up in the ring skirt. Back in and Layla tries some rollups before settling for a kick to the head for the pin at 2:48. This was one of the better Divas matches I can remember in a long time.
Vickie tells Layla to leave now because she's done. Vickie talks about the Jericho vs. Ziggler match last week and complains about how Ziggler had to defend the briefcase. She says that the Board of Directors needs to look at the abuse of power and give it back to an adult like her. Cue AJ who skips to the ring and then snaps, beating the tar out of Vickie and sending her running away.
We get a retrospective of HHH's time in DX, most of which apparently was in 2006.
It's time for anger management with Daniel Bryan. He says he doesn't need to be here because he's calm and not a loser. A kid comes in wearing a goat mask and Bryan snaps. The doctor says that the kid is his son and he's in a school play. More later.
Some actor in a WWE Films movie is the social media ambassador.
Punk has sent out a tweet about Lawler and that snaps Jerry. He gets on the table and talks about the people he fought in Memphis, one of which was Andy Kaufman. Lawler is in the WWE Hall of Fame and he got there by standing up to people when he needed to. The match is on tonight.
John Cena vs. The Miz
Non-title of course. Cena takes him to the mat to start with a headlock and we take a quick break. Back with Josh Matthews having taken over for Lawler. Miz is on the floor after escaping an AA. Cena bulldogs Miz down for two but the Champion gets in a shot to Cena to take over. The corner clothesline and top rope double ax gets two. Off to the chinlock as we actually hear about the movie Miz is going to be in. It's the third Marine movie so take that for what it's worth.
Cena easily counters out of it with a suplex but Miz hits the backbreaker and neckbreaker combo for two. Cena grabs the STF out of nowhere but Miz is near the ropes. Miz immediately kicks Cena's knee out and DDTs him down for two. The Final is countered but Miz hits Matt Hardy's Side Effect for two. Cena blocks the Finale again and starts his finishing sequence. AA gets the completely clean pin at approximately 10:00.
You can pick from a tables match, a cage match or a No DQ match for the main event.
HHH is still awesome apparently. This one focuses on the torn quad. That would be the first torn quad. The pop for his return in 2002 is still amazing.
Bryan complains about having a bad boss and shows how insane wrestling angles are when you explain then out loud. The last patient for the group shows up and it's Kane, in full attire including the welding mask.
Heath Slater vs. Santino Marella
Comedy match ahoy! Santino does a slow motion takedown and dances around on Slater's back. It turns into a dance off but Slater punches him in the face instead. Slater puts him down and goes up but Santino keeps rolling away. Santino starts his comeback and hits his usual stuff before loading up the Cobra. Cue Aksana for the distraction but he hits Slater with it anyway and the pin at 3:14.
Brodus Clay/Sin Cara vs. Cody Rhodes/Damien Sandow
Cody and Sandow say they're smart before the match. This is joined in progress after a break with Cody holding Cara in a chinlock. Off to Sandow for that spinning elbow before it's back to Cody. Cara snaps off a rana and makes the tag to Brodus. A powerslam gets two on Cody but it draws Sandow in to break it up. Cara sends him to the floor and dives onto Damien to take him out. Brodus headbutts Cody out of the air and splashes him for the pin at 2:35 shown.
Back at anger management, Kane takes off his mask to reveal his second mask. Kane explains his entire character's history and it's absolutely hilarious. I've buried my brother alive. Twice actually. And for reasons unclear, I have an unhealthy obsession with torturing Pete Rose. Everyone else leaves and Kane chokes a guy named Harold who gets too close to him. This was GREAT.
More HHH stuff.
R-Truth vs. Daniel Bryan
Bryan tries to suppress his anger on the way to the ring. Truth and Bryan actually fist bump before the match starts. The fans chant GOAT FACE at Bryan to tick him off. Bryan fist bumps Little Jimmy before firing off the kicks to Truth. Truth comes back with the spinning forearm for two and sends Bryan to the floor. In a funny bit, Truth grabs the mic and says that YES, we are in Milwaukee! That makes Bryan snap and he yells at the crowd long enough to get counted out at 3:05.
Bryan snaps and freaks out in the ring.
Here's HHH for the big announcement about whether or not he's retiring. He talks about how he wanted to retire before the ring retired him. You can't fight time and he doesn't want to be the guy who comes back for the nostalgia pop and comes out because he's just getting a check. Lesnar has brought him to this point. HHH says he wants to come out here and be the Game and the Cerebral Assassin and beat up Lesnar, but he doesn't know if he can.
If he can't come back and beat Lesnar, maybe he's answered his own question. HHH talks about how everyone comes out here every week for the fans and every time someone comes through the curtain, they hope the fans care. I think that every time I've come to the ring, you've all cared. We're just ignoring 2003 now aren't we? HHH starts crying and says thank you for letting him play the game. He drops the mic and the fans chant thank you Hunter.
Dolph Ziggler/Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus/Randy Orton
Ziggler comes out to Jericho's entrance but says you'll never see him again after last week. Cole explains the MITB idea in detail as Orton and Ziggler start things off. Orton hits a quick slingshot suplex for no cover as he has to take out an interfering Del Rio. Sheamus hits a shoulder from the apron to take Alberto down. Ziggler bails to the floor as well as we take a break.
Back with Del Rio sending Orton into the post and then back inside for Ziggler to hit a knee to the ribs for two. Off to Alberto who starts in on the arm as is his custom. Orton sends Del Rio to the floor and finally makes the tag to Sheamus as Ziggler is brought in for the other team. White Noise is countered but the Irish Curse hits as everything breaks down. Ricardo throws in the briefcase but Orton hits the backbreaker on Ziggler followed by the Brogue Kick for the pin at 8:30.
Lawler asks Cena to not help him tonight. Cena seems to agree.
Kane comes out and Matthews runs off. Kane sits down on commentary for the next match.
David Otunga vs. Zach Ryder
Cole talks about social media and mentions Otunga being in a movie with Holly Berry. Otunga controls to start as Cole keeps trying to get anything out of Kane. It's sad to see the fans not care about Ryder at all anymore, but can you blame them? Ryder goes up but gets tripped off the ropes. That means nothing though as the Rough Ryder hits out of nowhere for the pin at 2:24.
Post match Kane grabs Ryder by the throat but lets him go and chokeslams Otunga instead. Ok then.
Cage match wins the poll by a large margin.
AJ comes out and says it's Cena vs. Punk at Night of Champions because she says so. Doesn't that make the whole ending of last week's show pointless?
CM Punk vs. Jerry Lawler
In a cage because the fans want it that way. Punk offers Lawler a free shot and it knocks Punk into the corner. This is non-title of course. Punk comes back with a neckbreaker as this match is going very slowly to start. As they're going this slowly, I saw a report that says that Harold from earlier was played by Scorpio Sky, aka Mason Andrews from recent TNA fame. Lawler gets slammed onto the mat and Punk goes up the corner.
That goes nowhere as Lawler moves so Punk snap mares him down and hits a low dropkick. CM goes up again but gets crotched. Lawler goes for the door but Punk pulls him back in and drops a bunch of elbows. Punk keeps saying he's the King of Memphis, Tennessee. Another neckbreaker is countered and Punk is sent into the cage. The fans think this is boring as Lawler makes his comeback. He goes up and drops the strap and the middle rope punch hits for two. Punk hits the knee in the corner and the Rock Bottom into the Vice for the tap at 7:40.
Post match Punk goes under the ring and finds a chain and a lock. He locks the cage shut and puts Lawler in a chinlock. Punk appears to be bleeding from the forearm. He demands that Lawler say he's the best in the world but Lawler won't do it. Punk beats on him until Cena comes out but Cena can't get in. Instead of, I don't know, climbing the cage, he screams to raise the cage as Punk drops a bunch of knees on Lawler's head. It finally goes up and Punk says he's the best in the world before bailing.
Results
Ryback b. Jack Swagger Shell Shock
Layla b. Natalya Kick to the head
John Cena b. The Miz Attitude Adjustment
Santino Marella b. Heath Slater Cobra
Brodus Clay/Sin Cara b. Cody Rhodes/Damien Sandow Splash to Rhodes
R-Truth b. Daniel Bryan via countout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Zach Ryder b. David Otunga Rough Ryder
CM Punk b. Jerry Lawler Anaconda Vice
Tuesday
Cameron, one of Brodus Clay's dancers, was arrested for DUI.
Raw got a 3.1.
Wednesday
D-Von posted a message on Twitter implying he's done with TNA. We'll likely see more of that on Thursday.
NXT
Date: August 29, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, William Regal
It's time for the title match tonight and I'm actually somewhat excited. This change officially turns NXT into its own regular promotion which is what it needed for the last year and a half or so. It's Jinder Mahal vs. Seth Rollins for the inaugural title, which is a matchup I didn't think I'd like. Mahal is growing on me as a basic foreign heel and Rollins....well he's energetic. Let's get to it.
Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton vs. Hunico/Camacho
Jordan/Dalton won the first match between these teams. Regal calls the fans the NXT Universe now. Great. Now we're hearing the same stupid lines from NXT that we hear on Raw and Smackdown. Jordan and Camacho start us off with Jordan getting in some basic offense before walking into a pretty good spinebuster. Camacho pounds on Jordan's face and suplexes him down to bring in Hunico.
Back to Camacho after nothing of note and the bigger guy throws Jordan around with a nice butterfly suplex. A legdrop gets two but Jordan escapes a suplex and tags in Dalton. Dalton hits a spinwheel kick and a charge in the corner, followed by a hurricanrana for two. A missile dropkick gets two on Hunico and everything breaks down. As Jordan is being put back on the apron, Camacho hits Dalton from behing, allowing Hunico to hit his version of an Angle Slam for the pin at 4:00.
Here are the Usos with something to say. They call out the Ascension and as the lights go out for Ascension's entrance, Ascension runs in from behind and jumps the Usos, laying them out with relative ease.
Raw ReBound is about Punk vs. Lawler. I'm still curious as to when Cena forgot hot to climb a cage.
Big E. Langston vs. Chase Donovan
A clothesline and that falling slam thing gets the pin at 40 seconds. He really needs to change finishers. A powerslam would be fine.
The locker room comes out to watch the title match.
Langston says nothing.
Howard Finkel is doing the announcing for the main event.
Dusty comes out and JR is now on commentary.
NXT Championship: Jinder Mahal vs. Seth Rollins
They have a ton of time for this. Fink may be fat and older now (he's only 62 so he's hardly ancient), but that voice is still perfect. Mahal won't shake Dusty's hand before the match. Rollins tries to take him to the mat to start but Mahal gets back up quickly. A dropkick puts Mahal down again and Rollins hits a hard chop. Mahal gets sent to the floor but he avoids a dive and sends Rollins face first into the apron. A suplex onto the ramp has Rollins in trouble and we head back in.
We take a break and come back with Rollins in even more trouble. Mahal stomps him down and hits a backbreaker to start setting up the camel clutch. Rollins gets choked against the ropes and the fans are behind Rollins now. He tries a comeback but gets kneed in the face by Mahal to take him back down. The camel clutch is escaped so Mahal pounds him in the back again. An enziguri out of nowhere puts Mahal down and Rollins punches Jinder down.
Mahal goes up for another knee but Rollins knocks him off the top and out to the floor. Rollins hits a HUGE dive to the floor and both guys are down. Back in and Seth goes up again, only to get crotched and superplexed from the top. We take another break and come back with the two of them slugging it out. Mahal might have a bad knee but he pulls off a sitout slam for two. A full nelson slam is countered and Rollins goes to the apron.
Seth hits an enziguri to the head and a running knee for two. The near falls are getting closer and closer here. A running forearm in the corner staggers Mahal but he manages to drop Rollins face first into the buckle. The low superkick (I think he calls it Avada Kadavra, making Rollins awesome) gets two. Phoenix Splash (moonsault into a 450) misses and Mahal hits the full nelson slam for two. Rollins gets to the rope before the clutch can go on and Rollins rolls him up for two. Rollins comes back with the buckle bomb and the Blackout out of nowhere for the pin and the title at 14:24 shown of 21:24.
Fink giving Rollins the NEEEEEEEEEEEEEW treatment makes the announcement much better. The roster puts Rollins on their shoulders to end the show.
Results
Hunico/Camacho b. Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton Reverse fireman's carry slam to Dalton
Big E. Langston b. Chase Donovan Over the shoulder mat slam
Seth Rollins b. Jinder Mahal Blackout
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: August 30, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
Tonight is likely to be about Aces and 8's again, but they really need to talk about the PPV. If my math is right, there's only one match announced, and that's the finals of the BFG Series, which may or may not be three matches. Other than that though, I don't think anything is set. Then again it's a throwaway show anyway. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's show. This is followed by the ending brawl from last week's show where Aries' hand/arm was broken.
Here's Aries to open things up. He has a cast on his right hand but he holds the title up with it anyway. Aries talks about Aces and 8's pulling off something major last week. He isn't medically cleared to wrestle tonight, but he can fight. Also, they broke his right hand, but he punches with his left. Aries wants the leader to come out here tonight and fight him.
Instead (I hope) here are Hogan and Sting. Hogan rants about Aces and 8's and thanks Sting for helping while Hogan was gone. Hulk is in charge again and says Aries can have whatever he wants. Aries says he wants the boss of Aces and 8's again and here they are on the monitor. They seem to be celebrating and the leader says they'll do things on their own time. They'll be out here later on.
ODB calls Eric and says that if he doesn't call back in ten minutes, they're done. There's no call and ODB says he has another five minutes. It goes over and hour and it's still not over. She gives him until next week and wants fried chicken.
Bound For Glory Series Leaderboard
James Storm 66
Samoa Joe 61
Rob Van Dam 55
Bully Ray 55
AJ Styles 50
Kurt Angle 48
Mr. Anderson 47
Jeff Hardy 42
Christopher Daniels 33
Magnus 28
Robbie E 12
D'Angelo Dinero 7
Bound For Glory Series: Rob Van Dam vs. James Storm
Basically if Van Dam wins he clinches a spot in the final four but he still has another shot. Storm is more or less a lock already. Apparently whoever has the most points gets to pick who he faces in the semi-finals at No Surrender. Ok so it's three matches at the PPV. Feeling out process to start with Storm getting a small advantage via a headlock. A kick from Van Dam and a forearm from Storm get two each.
They both fire away in the corner and no one can get an advantage again. Apparently whoever loses between Angle and Hardy is out of the running. Van Dam sends him to the floor and hits a big dive to take Storm out as we take a break. Back with Storm hitting a clothesline for two. Van Dam kicks him down again and hits Rolling Thunder for another near fall.
A running DDT from Storm gets another two and Eye of the Storm gets the same. Van Dam sends him into the corner and hits a yelling monkey flip to put Storm down. This is good back and forth stuff. Rob tries another monkey flip in the other corner but jumps into the superkick. It hit the chest but it gets the pin for Storm at 11:13.
Here's Madison who says she has her rematch for the title tonight. That's not what she gets though.
ODB vs. Madison Rayne
ODB spits the liquid courage at Madison and starts very fast. The Bam (TKO) finishes this in 25 seconds.
Post match here's Eric in a suit with fried chicken. He wants to leave with her but ODB doesn't like the suit because that's not the Eric she married. Eric doesn't like it either so he strips. ODB eats chicken and jumps on him.
AJ says he's glad the Clair stuff is behind him. Right now though, he's focusing on the BFG Series.
The judges debate the Gut Check guy from last week. They don't seem that impressed.
Hogan and Sting debate who gets to do something. Hogan wants a slow buildup to whatever they're doing. Sting waves in Daniels and Kaz who beg to not be fired. Hogan yells at them a lot and says they're what's wrong with this business today. No, not really Hulk. They have to defend the titles sometime soon apparently. Sting scares the appletini out of Daniels' glass to send the champions away. Hogan and Sting argue over the use of each others' catchphrases.
Bound For Glory Series: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles
This should be good. Feeling out process to start but Joe blocks the drop down/kick because he knows AJ that well. AJ bails to the floor for a second before coming back in to continue feeling each other out. A clothesline puts AJ down but he nips up into a headscissors to send Joe into the corner. Joe is too heavy to suplex, but Joe misses a kick and AJ goes for the leg.
Joe kicks AJ off so AJ dropkicks Joe's head off to send him to the floor. There's a bit dive but Joe kicks him on the way down. AJ looks like he got snapped by a very wet towel. Back in and the snap powerslam gets two for the Samoan from LA. AJ gets chopped down and there's an STF from the fat one. That doesn't work so Joe switches over to the Rings of Saturn. AJ finally gets a rope so Joe kicks his head off.
The backsplash misses so AJ hits the springboard forearm. He Pele's the arm that Magnus injured with the chair a few weeks back but Joe blocks a cross armbreaker. AJ charges at Joe in the corner, only to get Rock Bottomed down. The Clutch is countered into a pair of rollups for two but the second is countered into the Clutch but it's not fully on. AJ escapes that and puts on the armbreaker, but Joe rolls on top of him for the pin at 8:10.
Time for Gut Check. Lewie says that he gave his best effort but also says he gets better every day. Taz says no. Pritchard says no as well thank goodness. Joey ryan pops up with a megaphone and goes off on Snow before throwing a drink on him. Snow has to be held back. That doesn't last long and Snow chases Ryan out of the arena.
Joseph Park asks Sting and Hogan if he can investigate Aces and 8's. Hulk agrees, presumably to get Park to leave him alone.
Bound For Glory Series: Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle
Both guys basically have to win. They have a ton of time too so this should be good. Angle almost immediately takes Hardy to the mat and puts on an armbar. Hardy counters into one of his own but Kurt will have none of that. Jeff headscissors him to the floor and hits a clothesline off the apron to take both guys down. Jeff kicks him in the corner but Kurt comes out with a clothesline as we take a break.
Back with Hardy using his fast paced comeback, including the legdrop between the legs and a low dropkick for two. That just fires Kurt up and it's rolling Germans time. Hardy comes back with a Twisting Stunner for two followed by the Whisper in the Wind for the same. Angle snaps off a belly to belly and there go the straps.
A big Angle Slam gets two and why is Kurt surprised by that? Seriously, why? Ankle lock is countered into a rollup and a Twist of Fate. Swanton hits perfectly but only gets a very close two. Ankle lock is countered again and the mule kick looks to set up the Swanton again, but Kurt runs the ropes. Jeff shoves him off (good thing too as Angle was in the middle of the ring) and the second Swanton gets the pin at 11:15.
Angle is eliminated from the Series now.
JB introduces the final five people who could still make No Surrender: Hardy, RVD, Samoa Joe, Bully Ray and James Storm. Next week it's Hardy vs. Joe and RVD vs. Ray. Storm has already locked in his spot at No Surrender. No word on who has to do what to win.
Here's Aries to close the show. Instead of the leader of Aces and 8's, we get Hogan again. I really don't like the way that seems to be going. The final five are behind Hogan and Sting on the stage. Scratch that as Styles is there too and Ray is next to Sting and Hogan. Hogan wants to see the faces of Aces and 8's. Aries says he wants the ugly one but they can pick who that is. Aces and 8's show up in the crowd and Hogan calls them out again. He says their finest is in the ring so Aces and 8's can send their finest too.
Two smaller guys go to the railing but they're just opening it for a bigger guy to get in the ring. This is a fight, not a match. The guy is right handed and he slugs Aries down. Aries spears him down and pounds away as the rest of the team gets in. It's a big brawl on the floor while aries pounds on the guy that was sent into the ring. The running dropkick in the corner takes the big guy down and hee goes for the mask. Someone gets on the apron and puts his mask back on while pulling out a flapjack. He knocks Aries out and the whole team runs off. Apparently the guy that hit Aries wasn't there at first. Aries is out cold to end the show.
Results
James Storm b. Rob Van Dam Last Call
ODB b. Madison Rayne The Bam
Samoa Joe b. AJ Styles Rollup
Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle Swanton Bomb
Friday
Smackdown got a 1.1, just under what they did last week. Considering college football returned last night, that's pretty good.
Smackdown
Date: August 31, 2012
Location: Resch Center Arena, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews
After last week's huge mess, hopefully Smackdown can turn things around tonight. Last week was one of the worst shows I can remember in a long time, which is a shame as I used to love Smackdown. Anyway, we're getting very close to Night of Champions now and unfortunately, Del Rio hasn't been hit by a bus or anything like that to keep us from having to sit through another title shot for him. Let's get to it.
Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine at the moment is Del Rio vs. Sheamus. I can't stand this feud and about 80% of that is on Del Rio.
Orton vs. Ziggler later. Gee I wonder how that's going to end.
Here's Sheamus to open the show. First up, he needs to praise HHH. Sheamus isn't sure what HHH's future holds but he has Sheamus' respect. HHH is the embodiment of a champion, which is everything Del Rio isn't. This brings out Damien Sandow of all people. He talks about how Sheamus is as ignorant as he is enormous because of his praise of HHH.
He goes on about Sheamus and HHH promotes a stereotype to the WWE Universe but Sheamus cuts him off. The champ doesn't want to hear Sandow yap for twenty minutes so why not come into the ring right now and have a fight. Sandow says Sheamus isn't worth his time but here's Booker with a dissenting opinion. He makes Sandow vs. Sheamus for later, which is already more exciting than anything else from last week.
Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes
Cody talks about how Rey is just like Sin Cara, hiding behind a mask. Rhodes uses his power advantage to start but he ducks his head, letting Rey get in a kick to the face. Cody sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Cody hitting a spinning suplex for two. A release gordbuster gets two followed by some knees to the back and a chinlock.
Cody goes for the mask but gets sent face first into the buckle. Rey speeds things up and hits a seated senton followed by a big kick to the head for two. A knee to Rey's head gets two but Mysterio kicks Cody into 619 position. Cody catches Rey's legs but Rey counters the counter into a sunset flip for the pin at 5:31 shown of 9:01.
Cody beats up Rey post match until Cara makes the save and puts a Sin Cara mask on Cody.
We get the first anger management segment from Monday.
Kaitlyn vs. Natalya
Eve is on commentary. Nattie takes her down with a headlock to start and the place is eerily quiet. Kaitlyn shoulder blocks her down and they head to the floor where Kaitlyn gets her head slammed into the floor. Natalya hooks an abdominal stretch and slaps Kaitlyn's side which has to hurt bad. Kaitlyn comes back with some armdrags but Natalya clotheslines her down. The Canadian runs her mouth and gets small packaged for the pin at 2:45. Getting extra time is helping the Divas a tiny bit but this was more about Eve, who spent the whole match being the corporate suckup, which does nothing for me at all.
Booker is worried about the pressure of being Raw GM is getting to AJ. He says the match between Jericho and Ziggler never should have been made. Vickie comes up and says this is more proof that AJ needs to go. Sweet Christmas enough with the power struggle storylines already.
Raw ReBound talks about Punk/Lawler/Cena from Monday.
Anger management segment #2.
Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow
Sandow is taken into the ropes to start and requests that the referee does his job. Sandow tries to take it into the corner but Sheamus grabs his beard. To avoid getting punched in the face, Damien drops to the floor and things slow down again. The champ starts running him over with shoulders and Sandow heads to the floor again. This time Sheamus is tired of waiting so he goes out after Damien, only to have his knees sent into the steps by Sandow.
That gets an eight count and Sandow stomps away back inside. Off to a chinlock which Sheamus breaks pretty quickly. A regular neckbreaker (as opposed to the double arm version) gets two for Sandow and it's back to the chinlock. This one is broken even faster and Sheamus starts his hard hitting offense.
Damien bails to the floor for the third time but Sheamus throws him right back in and hits the ten forearms. A slingshot shoulder block to the back gets two and Damien heads to the floor for I think the fourth time. White Noise is escaped and the Brogue Kick is ducked. Sandow rolls to the floor and sprints up the ramp for the countout at 6:51.
Prime Time Players vs. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd
Kidd and Gabriel have matching yellow shirts which look like dresses on them. Kidd and Titus get things going as the Usos Tout about how they should be #1 contenders. Off to Young vs. Gabriel after the starters do nothing of note. Justin takes Young to the mat after making a blind tag, allowing Kidd to kick Darren in the face.
Off to Titus who powers Tyson down and brings Darren back in. The Players are very good about tagging in and out quickly. Tyson sends Young into the corner and tags out to Justin. An STO puts Darren down and Justin loads up the 450, only for Titus to distract him. Darren crotches Gabriel and hits the fireman's carry gutbuster for the pin at 3:13. This one looked better as he launched Gabriel into the air and Justin was in free fall when he hit the knees.
The final anger management segment airs. Kane's explanation of his history is still hilarious.
Here's Del Rio with something to say. Alberto brags about beating Orton last week but doesn't care to be reminded that Sheamus has beaten him every time. Del Rio threatens Josh but here's Kane for protection I guess. Kane says he's here to apologize for attacking Josh at Summerslam. Teddy comes out and makes Kane vs. Alberto.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Kane
This is joined in progress after a break but it doesn't look like we missed much. Kane pounds on Del Rio in the corner but Alberto comes back with some kicks to the legs. Kane comes back with a low dropkick to the head for two and an uppercut that sends Del Rio to the apron. Del Rio rams Kane's arm into the buckle and follows it up with a kick to the shoulder. Kane will have none of that and hits a sidewalk slam to set up the top rope clothesline for no cover. Kane loads up the chokeslam but Ricardo pulls Kane's leg. The distraction lets Del Rio hit a Backstabber for the pin at 2:46.
Post match Kane snaps and chokeslams Josh, but he apologizes while he does it.
HHH video from Raw.
Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler dropkicks Randy down to start and struts a bit. Dolph shows off a bit so Randy dropkicks him down as well in a nice touch. A slingshot suplex gets two on Dolph but Ziggler comes back with a neckbreaker and some elbow drops. Orton wins a slugout and fires off his clotheslines. The powerslam sets up the elevated DDT but Ziggler counters. Ziggler doesn't get back inside though and Orton pulls him to the top rope for a superplex.
That only gets two and Ziggler comes back with a jumping DDT for another near fall. The crowd is starting to get into this. Dolph charges at Randy but gets caught in the Elevated DDT for another two. Orton was laughing while he hit that which was kind of a nice touch. They head to the floor with Ziggler being thrown over the announce table. Back inside and Ziggler misses the Zig Zag, allowing the RKO to pin him at 7:10.
Vickie immediately announces that Dolph is still Mr. MITB and says he did a good job. Yes, make sure you hammer in that the guy who is going to get a title match is such a loser.
Results
Rey Mysterio b. Cody Rhodes Sunset Flip
Kaitlyn b. Natalya Small Package
Sheamus b. Damien Sandow via countout
Prime Time Players b. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd Fireman's carry gutbuster to Gabriel
Alberto Del Rio b. Kane Backstabber
Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler RKO
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Cameron has been suspended for 15 days, starting this past Friday.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Ryback b. Jack Swagger Shell Shock
Layla b. Natalya Kick to the head
John Cena b. The Miz Attitude Adjustment
Santino Marella b. Heath Slater Cobra
Brodus Clay/Sin Cara b. Cody Rhodes/Damien Sandow Splash to Rhodes
R-Truth b. Daniel Bryan via countout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Zach Ryder b. David Otunga Rough Ryder
CM Punk b. Jerry Lawler Anaconda Vice
NXT
Hunico/Camacho b. Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton Reverse fireman's carry slam to Dalton
Big E. Langston b. Chase Donovan Over the shoulder mat slam
Seth Rollins b. Jinder Mahal Blackout
Impact Wrestling
James Storm b. Rob Van Dam Last Call
ODB b. Madison Rayne The Bam
Samoa Joe b. AJ Styles Rollup
Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle Swanton Bomb
Smackdown
Rey Mysterio b. Cody Rhodes Sunset Flip
Kaitlyn b. Natalya Small Package
Sheamus b. Damien Sandow via countout
Prime Time Players b. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd Fireman's carry gutbuster to Gabriel
Alberto Del Rio b. Kane Backstabber
Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler RKO
Monday Night Raw
Date: August 27, 2012
Location: Bradley Arena, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
The focus tonight is going to be on Punk, at least in theory. He attacked Lawler last week which will probably set up a match between the two of them because the WWE solution to a heel turn that isn't quit clicking is always to beat up the King. Also we need to find out if Cena vs. Punk III is going to happen, which I think you already know the answer to. Let's get to it.
We open with the standard recap from Summerslam and last week.
Cole does the usual opening to the show but Lawler gets in the ring. He says that at the end of Raw 1000, he said something that Punk took offense to, and last week Punk kicked him in the head for it. Now Lawler wants an apology so he calls out Punk. Here's the champ who isn't pleased. Punk actually does say he's sorry, but he doesn't get how beating up a bunch of nobodies from Memphis makes you a Hall of Famer.
Punk runs down Lawler's career and focuses on his time on commentary. After all those years, Lawler got a Wrestlemania moment and he couldn't even beat Michael Cole. Lawler gets angry and Punk wants to know if Lawler wants a fight. Lawler says no but Punk keeps pushing it. Punk leaves and Lawler says he'll think about it.
Jack Swagger vs. Ryback
Ryback takes him down almost immediately and slams Swagger's head into the mat over and over. A charge misses though and Swagger shoulder blocks Ryback down. Vader Bomb hits feet but Swagger counters into an ankle lock attempt. Ryback escapes and pounds him in the corner. A BADLY botched backdrop results in Swagger being dropped on his head ala Sabu vs. Benoit in ECW. The clothesline sets up Shell Shock for the pin at 2:12.
Swagger says that's it and yells a lot.
Lawler is still thinking about fighting Punk.
Natalya vs. Layla
Before the match, Vickie comes out and says to hurry the match up because she has something to say. Layla speeds things up to start and hits some nice athletic stuff, including a few rollups and a springboard cross body for two. Natalya kicks her to the floor and ties Layla up in the ring skirt. Back in and Layla tries some rollups before settling for a kick to the head for the pin at 2:48. This was one of the better Divas matches I can remember in a long time.
Vickie tells Layla to leave now because she's done. Vickie talks about the Jericho vs. Ziggler match last week and complains about how Ziggler had to defend the briefcase. She says that the Board of Directors needs to look at the abuse of power and give it back to an adult like her. Cue AJ who skips to the ring and then snaps, beating the tar out of Vickie and sending her running away.
We get a retrospective of HHH's time in DX, most of which apparently was in 2006.
It's time for anger management with Daniel Bryan. He says he doesn't need to be here because he's calm and not a loser. A kid comes in wearing a goat mask and Bryan snaps. The doctor says that the kid is his son and he's in a school play. More later.
Some actor in a WWE Films movie is the social media ambassador.
Punk has sent out a tweet about Lawler and that snaps Jerry. He gets on the table and talks about the people he fought in Memphis, one of which was Andy Kaufman. Lawler is in the WWE Hall of Fame and he got there by standing up to people when he needed to. The match is on tonight.
John Cena vs. The Miz
Non-title of course. Cena takes him to the mat to start with a headlock and we take a quick break. Back with Josh Matthews having taken over for Lawler. Miz is on the floor after escaping an AA. Cena bulldogs Miz down for two but the Champion gets in a shot to Cena to take over. The corner clothesline and top rope double ax gets two. Off to the chinlock as we actually hear about the movie Miz is going to be in. It's the third Marine movie so take that for what it's worth.
Cena easily counters out of it with a suplex but Miz hits the backbreaker and neckbreaker combo for two. Cena grabs the STF out of nowhere but Miz is near the ropes. Miz immediately kicks Cena's knee out and DDTs him down for two. The Final is countered but Miz hits Matt Hardy's Side Effect for two. Cena blocks the Finale again and starts his finishing sequence. AA gets the completely clean pin at approximately 10:00.
You can pick from a tables match, a cage match or a No DQ match for the main event.
HHH is still awesome apparently. This one focuses on the torn quad. That would be the first torn quad. The pop for his return in 2002 is still amazing.
Bryan complains about having a bad boss and shows how insane wrestling angles are when you explain then out loud. The last patient for the group shows up and it's Kane, in full attire including the welding mask.
Heath Slater vs. Santino Marella
Comedy match ahoy! Santino does a slow motion takedown and dances around on Slater's back. It turns into a dance off but Slater punches him in the face instead. Slater puts him down and goes up but Santino keeps rolling away. Santino starts his comeback and hits his usual stuff before loading up the Cobra. Cue Aksana for the distraction but he hits Slater with it anyway and the pin at 3:14.
Brodus Clay/Sin Cara vs. Cody Rhodes/Damien Sandow
Cody and Sandow say they're smart before the match. This is joined in progress after a break with Cody holding Cara in a chinlock. Off to Sandow for that spinning elbow before it's back to Cody. Cara snaps off a rana and makes the tag to Brodus. A powerslam gets two on Cody but it draws Sandow in to break it up. Cara sends him to the floor and dives onto Damien to take him out. Brodus headbutts Cody out of the air and splashes him for the pin at 2:35 shown.
Back at anger management, Kane takes off his mask to reveal his second mask. Kane explains his entire character's history and it's absolutely hilarious. I've buried my brother alive. Twice actually. And for reasons unclear, I have an unhealthy obsession with torturing Pete Rose. Everyone else leaves and Kane chokes a guy named Harold who gets too close to him. This was GREAT.
More HHH stuff.
R-Truth vs. Daniel Bryan
Bryan tries to suppress his anger on the way to the ring. Truth and Bryan actually fist bump before the match starts. The fans chant GOAT FACE at Bryan to tick him off. Bryan fist bumps Little Jimmy before firing off the kicks to Truth. Truth comes back with the spinning forearm for two and sends Bryan to the floor. In a funny bit, Truth grabs the mic and says that YES, we are in Milwaukee! That makes Bryan snap and he yells at the crowd long enough to get counted out at 3:05.
Bryan snaps and freaks out in the ring.
Here's HHH for the big announcement about whether or not he's retiring. He talks about how he wanted to retire before the ring retired him. You can't fight time and he doesn't want to be the guy who comes back for the nostalgia pop and comes out because he's just getting a check. Lesnar has brought him to this point. HHH says he wants to come out here and be the Game and the Cerebral Assassin and beat up Lesnar, but he doesn't know if he can.
If he can't come back and beat Lesnar, maybe he's answered his own question. HHH talks about how everyone comes out here every week for the fans and every time someone comes through the curtain, they hope the fans care. I think that every time I've come to the ring, you've all cared. We're just ignoring 2003 now aren't we? HHH starts crying and says thank you for letting him play the game. He drops the mic and the fans chant thank you Hunter.
Dolph Ziggler/Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus/Randy Orton
Ziggler comes out to Jericho's entrance but says you'll never see him again after last week. Cole explains the MITB idea in detail as Orton and Ziggler start things off. Orton hits a quick slingshot suplex for no cover as he has to take out an interfering Del Rio. Sheamus hits a shoulder from the apron to take Alberto down. Ziggler bails to the floor as well as we take a break.
Back with Del Rio sending Orton into the post and then back inside for Ziggler to hit a knee to the ribs for two. Off to Alberto who starts in on the arm as is his custom. Orton sends Del Rio to the floor and finally makes the tag to Sheamus as Ziggler is brought in for the other team. White Noise is countered but the Irish Curse hits as everything breaks down. Ricardo throws in the briefcase but Orton hits the backbreaker on Ziggler followed by the Brogue Kick for the pin at 8:30.
Lawler asks Cena to not help him tonight. Cena seems to agree.
Kane comes out and Matthews runs off. Kane sits down on commentary for the next match.
David Otunga vs. Zach Ryder
Cole talks about social media and mentions Otunga being in a movie with Holly Berry. Otunga controls to start as Cole keeps trying to get anything out of Kane. It's sad to see the fans not care about Ryder at all anymore, but can you blame them? Ryder goes up but gets tripped off the ropes. That means nothing though as the Rough Ryder hits out of nowhere for the pin at 2:24.
Post match Kane grabs Ryder by the throat but lets him go and chokeslams Otunga instead. Ok then.
Cage match wins the poll by a large margin.
AJ comes out and says it's Cena vs. Punk at Night of Champions because she says so. Doesn't that make the whole ending of last week's show pointless?
CM Punk vs. Jerry Lawler
In a cage because the fans want it that way. Punk offers Lawler a free shot and it knocks Punk into the corner. This is non-title of course. Punk comes back with a neckbreaker as this match is going very slowly to start. As they're going this slowly, I saw a report that says that Harold from earlier was played by Scorpio Sky, aka Mason Andrews from recent TNA fame. Lawler gets slammed onto the mat and Punk goes up the corner.
That goes nowhere as Lawler moves so Punk snap mares him down and hits a low dropkick. CM goes up again but gets crotched. Lawler goes for the door but Punk pulls him back in and drops a bunch of elbows. Punk keeps saying he's the King of Memphis, Tennessee. Another neckbreaker is countered and Punk is sent into the cage. The fans think this is boring as Lawler makes his comeback. He goes up and drops the strap and the middle rope punch hits for two. Punk hits the knee in the corner and the Rock Bottom into the Vice for the tap at 7:40.
Post match Punk goes under the ring and finds a chain and a lock. He locks the cage shut and puts Lawler in a chinlock. Punk appears to be bleeding from the forearm. He demands that Lawler say he's the best in the world but Lawler won't do it. Punk beats on him until Cena comes out but Cena can't get in. Instead of, I don't know, climbing the cage, he screams to raise the cage as Punk drops a bunch of knees on Lawler's head. It finally goes up and Punk says he's the best in the world before bailing.
Results
Ryback b. Jack Swagger Shell Shock
Layla b. Natalya Kick to the head
John Cena b. The Miz Attitude Adjustment
Santino Marella b. Heath Slater Cobra
Brodus Clay/Sin Cara b. Cody Rhodes/Damien Sandow Splash to Rhodes
R-Truth b. Daniel Bryan via countout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Zach Ryder b. David Otunga Rough Ryder
CM Punk b. Jerry Lawler Anaconda Vice
Tuesday
Cameron, one of Brodus Clay's dancers, was arrested for DUI.
Raw got a 3.1.
Wednesday
D-Von posted a message on Twitter implying he's done with TNA. We'll likely see more of that on Thursday.
NXT
Date: August 29, 2012
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, William Regal
It's time for the title match tonight and I'm actually somewhat excited. This change officially turns NXT into its own regular promotion which is what it needed for the last year and a half or so. It's Jinder Mahal vs. Seth Rollins for the inaugural title, which is a matchup I didn't think I'd like. Mahal is growing on me as a basic foreign heel and Rollins....well he's energetic. Let's get to it.
Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton vs. Hunico/Camacho
Jordan/Dalton won the first match between these teams. Regal calls the fans the NXT Universe now. Great. Now we're hearing the same stupid lines from NXT that we hear on Raw and Smackdown. Jordan and Camacho start us off with Jordan getting in some basic offense before walking into a pretty good spinebuster. Camacho pounds on Jordan's face and suplexes him down to bring in Hunico.
Back to Camacho after nothing of note and the bigger guy throws Jordan around with a nice butterfly suplex. A legdrop gets two but Jordan escapes a suplex and tags in Dalton. Dalton hits a spinwheel kick and a charge in the corner, followed by a hurricanrana for two. A missile dropkick gets two on Hunico and everything breaks down. As Jordan is being put back on the apron, Camacho hits Dalton from behing, allowing Hunico to hit his version of an Angle Slam for the pin at 4:00.
Here are the Usos with something to say. They call out the Ascension and as the lights go out for Ascension's entrance, Ascension runs in from behind and jumps the Usos, laying them out with relative ease.
Raw ReBound is about Punk vs. Lawler. I'm still curious as to when Cena forgot hot to climb a cage.
Big E. Langston vs. Chase Donovan
A clothesline and that falling slam thing gets the pin at 40 seconds. He really needs to change finishers. A powerslam would be fine.
The locker room comes out to watch the title match.
Langston says nothing.
Howard Finkel is doing the announcing for the main event.
Dusty comes out and JR is now on commentary.
NXT Championship: Jinder Mahal vs. Seth Rollins
They have a ton of time for this. Fink may be fat and older now (he's only 62 so he's hardly ancient), but that voice is still perfect. Mahal won't shake Dusty's hand before the match. Rollins tries to take him to the mat to start but Mahal gets back up quickly. A dropkick puts Mahal down again and Rollins hits a hard chop. Mahal gets sent to the floor but he avoids a dive and sends Rollins face first into the apron. A suplex onto the ramp has Rollins in trouble and we head back in.
We take a break and come back with Rollins in even more trouble. Mahal stomps him down and hits a backbreaker to start setting up the camel clutch. Rollins gets choked against the ropes and the fans are behind Rollins now. He tries a comeback but gets kneed in the face by Mahal to take him back down. The camel clutch is escaped so Mahal pounds him in the back again. An enziguri out of nowhere puts Mahal down and Rollins punches Jinder down.
Mahal goes up for another knee but Rollins knocks him off the top and out to the floor. Rollins hits a HUGE dive to the floor and both guys are down. Back in and Seth goes up again, only to get crotched and superplexed from the top. We take another break and come back with the two of them slugging it out. Mahal might have a bad knee but he pulls off a sitout slam for two. A full nelson slam is countered and Rollins goes to the apron.
Seth hits an enziguri to the head and a running knee for two. The near falls are getting closer and closer here. A running forearm in the corner staggers Mahal but he manages to drop Rollins face first into the buckle. The low superkick (I think he calls it Avada Kadavra, making Rollins awesome) gets two. Phoenix Splash (moonsault into a 450) misses and Mahal hits the full nelson slam for two. Rollins gets to the rope before the clutch can go on and Rollins rolls him up for two. Rollins comes back with the buckle bomb and the Blackout out of nowhere for the pin and the title at 14:24 shown of 21:24.
Fink giving Rollins the NEEEEEEEEEEEEEW treatment makes the announcement much better. The roster puts Rollins on their shoulders to end the show.
Results
Hunico/Camacho b. Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton Reverse fireman's carry slam to Dalton
Big E. Langston b. Chase Donovan Over the shoulder mat slam
Seth Rollins b. Jinder Mahal Blackout
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: August 30, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz
Tonight is likely to be about Aces and 8's again, but they really need to talk about the PPV. If my math is right, there's only one match announced, and that's the finals of the BFG Series, which may or may not be three matches. Other than that though, I don't think anything is set. Then again it's a throwaway show anyway. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of last week's show. This is followed by the ending brawl from last week's show where Aries' hand/arm was broken.
Here's Aries to open things up. He has a cast on his right hand but he holds the title up with it anyway. Aries talks about Aces and 8's pulling off something major last week. He isn't medically cleared to wrestle tonight, but he can fight. Also, they broke his right hand, but he punches with his left. Aries wants the leader to come out here tonight and fight him.
Instead (I hope) here are Hogan and Sting. Hogan rants about Aces and 8's and thanks Sting for helping while Hogan was gone. Hulk is in charge again and says Aries can have whatever he wants. Aries says he wants the boss of Aces and 8's again and here they are on the monitor. They seem to be celebrating and the leader says they'll do things on their own time. They'll be out here later on.
ODB calls Eric and says that if he doesn't call back in ten minutes, they're done. There's no call and ODB says he has another five minutes. It goes over and hour and it's still not over. She gives him until next week and wants fried chicken.
Bound For Glory Series Leaderboard
James Storm 66
Samoa Joe 61
Rob Van Dam 55
Bully Ray 55
AJ Styles 50
Kurt Angle 48
Mr. Anderson 47
Jeff Hardy 42
Christopher Daniels 33
Magnus 28
Robbie E 12
D'Angelo Dinero 7
Bound For Glory Series: Rob Van Dam vs. James Storm
Basically if Van Dam wins he clinches a spot in the final four but he still has another shot. Storm is more or less a lock already. Apparently whoever has the most points gets to pick who he faces in the semi-finals at No Surrender. Ok so it's three matches at the PPV. Feeling out process to start with Storm getting a small advantage via a headlock. A kick from Van Dam and a forearm from Storm get two each.
They both fire away in the corner and no one can get an advantage again. Apparently whoever loses between Angle and Hardy is out of the running. Van Dam sends him to the floor and hits a big dive to take Storm out as we take a break. Back with Storm hitting a clothesline for two. Van Dam kicks him down again and hits Rolling Thunder for another near fall.
A running DDT from Storm gets another two and Eye of the Storm gets the same. Van Dam sends him into the corner and hits a yelling monkey flip to put Storm down. This is good back and forth stuff. Rob tries another monkey flip in the other corner but jumps into the superkick. It hit the chest but it gets the pin for Storm at 11:13.
Here's Madison who says she has her rematch for the title tonight. That's not what she gets though.
ODB vs. Madison Rayne
ODB spits the liquid courage at Madison and starts very fast. The Bam (TKO) finishes this in 25 seconds.
Post match here's Eric in a suit with fried chicken. He wants to leave with her but ODB doesn't like the suit because that's not the Eric she married. Eric doesn't like it either so he strips. ODB eats chicken and jumps on him.
AJ says he's glad the Clair stuff is behind him. Right now though, he's focusing on the BFG Series.
The judges debate the Gut Check guy from last week. They don't seem that impressed.
Hogan and Sting debate who gets to do something. Hogan wants a slow buildup to whatever they're doing. Sting waves in Daniels and Kaz who beg to not be fired. Hogan yells at them a lot and says they're what's wrong with this business today. No, not really Hulk. They have to defend the titles sometime soon apparently. Sting scares the appletini out of Daniels' glass to send the champions away. Hogan and Sting argue over the use of each others' catchphrases.
Bound For Glory Series: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles
This should be good. Feeling out process to start but Joe blocks the drop down/kick because he knows AJ that well. AJ bails to the floor for a second before coming back in to continue feeling each other out. A clothesline puts AJ down but he nips up into a headscissors to send Joe into the corner. Joe is too heavy to suplex, but Joe misses a kick and AJ goes for the leg.
Joe kicks AJ off so AJ dropkicks Joe's head off to send him to the floor. There's a bit dive but Joe kicks him on the way down. AJ looks like he got snapped by a very wet towel. Back in and the snap powerslam gets two for the Samoan from LA. AJ gets chopped down and there's an STF from the fat one. That doesn't work so Joe switches over to the Rings of Saturn. AJ finally gets a rope so Joe kicks his head off.
The backsplash misses so AJ hits the springboard forearm. He Pele's the arm that Magnus injured with the chair a few weeks back but Joe blocks a cross armbreaker. AJ charges at Joe in the corner, only to get Rock Bottomed down. The Clutch is countered into a pair of rollups for two but the second is countered into the Clutch but it's not fully on. AJ escapes that and puts on the armbreaker, but Joe rolls on top of him for the pin at 8:10.
Time for Gut Check. Lewie says that he gave his best effort but also says he gets better every day. Taz says no. Pritchard says no as well thank goodness. Joey ryan pops up with a megaphone and goes off on Snow before throwing a drink on him. Snow has to be held back. That doesn't last long and Snow chases Ryan out of the arena.
Joseph Park asks Sting and Hogan if he can investigate Aces and 8's. Hulk agrees, presumably to get Park to leave him alone.
Bound For Glory Series: Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle
Both guys basically have to win. They have a ton of time too so this should be good. Angle almost immediately takes Hardy to the mat and puts on an armbar. Hardy counters into one of his own but Kurt will have none of that. Jeff headscissors him to the floor and hits a clothesline off the apron to take both guys down. Jeff kicks him in the corner but Kurt comes out with a clothesline as we take a break.
Back with Hardy using his fast paced comeback, including the legdrop between the legs and a low dropkick for two. That just fires Kurt up and it's rolling Germans time. Hardy comes back with a Twisting Stunner for two followed by the Whisper in the Wind for the same. Angle snaps off a belly to belly and there go the straps.
A big Angle Slam gets two and why is Kurt surprised by that? Seriously, why? Ankle lock is countered into a rollup and a Twist of Fate. Swanton hits perfectly but only gets a very close two. Ankle lock is countered again and the mule kick looks to set up the Swanton again, but Kurt runs the ropes. Jeff shoves him off (good thing too as Angle was in the middle of the ring) and the second Swanton gets the pin at 11:15.
Angle is eliminated from the Series now.
JB introduces the final five people who could still make No Surrender: Hardy, RVD, Samoa Joe, Bully Ray and James Storm. Next week it's Hardy vs. Joe and RVD vs. Ray. Storm has already locked in his spot at No Surrender. No word on who has to do what to win.
Here's Aries to close the show. Instead of the leader of Aces and 8's, we get Hogan again. I really don't like the way that seems to be going. The final five are behind Hogan and Sting on the stage. Scratch that as Styles is there too and Ray is next to Sting and Hogan. Hogan wants to see the faces of Aces and 8's. Aries says he wants the ugly one but they can pick who that is. Aces and 8's show up in the crowd and Hogan calls them out again. He says their finest is in the ring so Aces and 8's can send their finest too.
Two smaller guys go to the railing but they're just opening it for a bigger guy to get in the ring. This is a fight, not a match. The guy is right handed and he slugs Aries down. Aries spears him down and pounds away as the rest of the team gets in. It's a big brawl on the floor while aries pounds on the guy that was sent into the ring. The running dropkick in the corner takes the big guy down and hee goes for the mask. Someone gets on the apron and puts his mask back on while pulling out a flapjack. He knocks Aries out and the whole team runs off. Apparently the guy that hit Aries wasn't there at first. Aries is out cold to end the show.
Results
James Storm b. Rob Van Dam Last Call
ODB b. Madison Rayne The Bam
Samoa Joe b. AJ Styles Rollup
Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle Swanton Bomb
Friday
Smackdown got a 1.1, just under what they did last week. Considering college football returned last night, that's pretty good.
Smackdown
Date: August 31, 2012
Location: Resch Center Arena, Green Bay, Wisconsin
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews
After last week's huge mess, hopefully Smackdown can turn things around tonight. Last week was one of the worst shows I can remember in a long time, which is a shame as I used to love Smackdown. Anyway, we're getting very close to Night of Champions now and unfortunately, Del Rio hasn't been hit by a bus or anything like that to keep us from having to sit through another title shot for him. Let's get to it.
Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine at the moment is Del Rio vs. Sheamus. I can't stand this feud and about 80% of that is on Del Rio.
Orton vs. Ziggler later. Gee I wonder how that's going to end.
Here's Sheamus to open the show. First up, he needs to praise HHH. Sheamus isn't sure what HHH's future holds but he has Sheamus' respect. HHH is the embodiment of a champion, which is everything Del Rio isn't. This brings out Damien Sandow of all people. He talks about how Sheamus is as ignorant as he is enormous because of his praise of HHH.
He goes on about Sheamus and HHH promotes a stereotype to the WWE Universe but Sheamus cuts him off. The champ doesn't want to hear Sandow yap for twenty minutes so why not come into the ring right now and have a fight. Sandow says Sheamus isn't worth his time but here's Booker with a dissenting opinion. He makes Sandow vs. Sheamus for later, which is already more exciting than anything else from last week.
Rey Mysterio vs. Cody Rhodes
Cody talks about how Rey is just like Sin Cara, hiding behind a mask. Rhodes uses his power advantage to start but he ducks his head, letting Rey get in a kick to the face. Cody sends him out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Cody hitting a spinning suplex for two. A release gordbuster gets two followed by some knees to the back and a chinlock.
Cody goes for the mask but gets sent face first into the buckle. Rey speeds things up and hits a seated senton followed by a big kick to the head for two. A knee to Rey's head gets two but Mysterio kicks Cody into 619 position. Cody catches Rey's legs but Rey counters the counter into a sunset flip for the pin at 5:31 shown of 9:01.
Cody beats up Rey post match until Cara makes the save and puts a Sin Cara mask on Cody.
We get the first anger management segment from Monday.
Kaitlyn vs. Natalya
Eve is on commentary. Nattie takes her down with a headlock to start and the place is eerily quiet. Kaitlyn shoulder blocks her down and they head to the floor where Kaitlyn gets her head slammed into the floor. Natalya hooks an abdominal stretch and slaps Kaitlyn's side which has to hurt bad. Kaitlyn comes back with some armdrags but Natalya clotheslines her down. The Canadian runs her mouth and gets small packaged for the pin at 2:45. Getting extra time is helping the Divas a tiny bit but this was more about Eve, who spent the whole match being the corporate suckup, which does nothing for me at all.
Booker is worried about the pressure of being Raw GM is getting to AJ. He says the match between Jericho and Ziggler never should have been made. Vickie comes up and says this is more proof that AJ needs to go. Sweet Christmas enough with the power struggle storylines already.
Raw ReBound talks about Punk/Lawler/Cena from Monday.
Anger management segment #2.
Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow
Sandow is taken into the ropes to start and requests that the referee does his job. Sandow tries to take it into the corner but Sheamus grabs his beard. To avoid getting punched in the face, Damien drops to the floor and things slow down again. The champ starts running him over with shoulders and Sandow heads to the floor again. This time Sheamus is tired of waiting so he goes out after Damien, only to have his knees sent into the steps by Sandow.
That gets an eight count and Sandow stomps away back inside. Off to a chinlock which Sheamus breaks pretty quickly. A regular neckbreaker (as opposed to the double arm version) gets two for Sandow and it's back to the chinlock. This one is broken even faster and Sheamus starts his hard hitting offense.
Damien bails to the floor for the third time but Sheamus throws him right back in and hits the ten forearms. A slingshot shoulder block to the back gets two and Damien heads to the floor for I think the fourth time. White Noise is escaped and the Brogue Kick is ducked. Sandow rolls to the floor and sprints up the ramp for the countout at 6:51.
Prime Time Players vs. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd
Kidd and Gabriel have matching yellow shirts which look like dresses on them. Kidd and Titus get things going as the Usos Tout about how they should be #1 contenders. Off to Young vs. Gabriel after the starters do nothing of note. Justin takes Young to the mat after making a blind tag, allowing Kidd to kick Darren in the face.
Off to Titus who powers Tyson down and brings Darren back in. The Players are very good about tagging in and out quickly. Tyson sends Young into the corner and tags out to Justin. An STO puts Darren down and Justin loads up the 450, only for Titus to distract him. Darren crotches Gabriel and hits the fireman's carry gutbuster for the pin at 3:13. This one looked better as he launched Gabriel into the air and Justin was in free fall when he hit the knees.
The final anger management segment airs. Kane's explanation of his history is still hilarious.
Here's Del Rio with something to say. Alberto brags about beating Orton last week but doesn't care to be reminded that Sheamus has beaten him every time. Del Rio threatens Josh but here's Kane for protection I guess. Kane says he's here to apologize for attacking Josh at Summerslam. Teddy comes out and makes Kane vs. Alberto.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Kane
This is joined in progress after a break but it doesn't look like we missed much. Kane pounds on Del Rio in the corner but Alberto comes back with some kicks to the legs. Kane comes back with a low dropkick to the head for two and an uppercut that sends Del Rio to the apron. Del Rio rams Kane's arm into the buckle and follows it up with a kick to the shoulder. Kane will have none of that and hits a sidewalk slam to set up the top rope clothesline for no cover. Kane loads up the chokeslam but Ricardo pulls Kane's leg. The distraction lets Del Rio hit a Backstabber for the pin at 2:46.
Post match Kane snaps and chokeslams Josh, but he apologizes while he does it.
HHH video from Raw.
Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler dropkicks Randy down to start and struts a bit. Dolph shows off a bit so Randy dropkicks him down as well in a nice touch. A slingshot suplex gets two on Dolph but Ziggler comes back with a neckbreaker and some elbow drops. Orton wins a slugout and fires off his clotheslines. The powerslam sets up the elevated DDT but Ziggler counters. Ziggler doesn't get back inside though and Orton pulls him to the top rope for a superplex.
That only gets two and Ziggler comes back with a jumping DDT for another near fall. The crowd is starting to get into this. Dolph charges at Randy but gets caught in the Elevated DDT for another two. Orton was laughing while he hit that which was kind of a nice touch. They head to the floor with Ziggler being thrown over the announce table. Back inside and Ziggler misses the Zig Zag, allowing the RKO to pin him at 7:10.
Vickie immediately announces that Dolph is still Mr. MITB and says he did a good job. Yes, make sure you hammer in that the guy who is going to get a title match is such a loser.
Results
Rey Mysterio b. Cody Rhodes Sunset Flip
Kaitlyn b. Natalya Small Package
Sheamus b. Damien Sandow via countout
Prime Time Players b. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd Fireman's carry gutbuster to Gabriel
Alberto Del Rio b. Kane Backstabber
Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler RKO
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Cameron has been suspended for 15 days, starting this past Friday.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
Ryback b. Jack Swagger Shell Shock
Layla b. Natalya Kick to the head
John Cena b. The Miz Attitude Adjustment
Santino Marella b. Heath Slater Cobra
Brodus Clay/Sin Cara b. Cody Rhodes/Damien Sandow Splash to Rhodes
R-Truth b. Daniel Bryan via countout
Sheamus/Randy Orton b. Alberto Del Rio/Dolph Ziggler Brogue Kick to Ziggler
Zach Ryder b. David Otunga Rough Ryder
CM Punk b. Jerry Lawler Anaconda Vice
NXT
Hunico/Camacho b. Jason Jordan/Mike Dalton Reverse fireman's carry slam to Dalton
Big E. Langston b. Chase Donovan Over the shoulder mat slam
Seth Rollins b. Jinder Mahal Blackout
Impact Wrestling
James Storm b. Rob Van Dam Last Call
ODB b. Madison Rayne The Bam
Samoa Joe b. AJ Styles Rollup
Jeff Hardy b. Kurt Angle Swanton Bomb
Smackdown
Rey Mysterio b. Cody Rhodes Sunset Flip
Kaitlyn b. Natalya Small Package
Sheamus b. Damien Sandow via countout
Prime Time Players b. Justin Gabriel/Tyson Kidd Fireman's carry gutbuster to Gabriel
Alberto Del Rio b. Kane Backstabber
Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler RKO