klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Monday Night Raw
Date: June 8, 2015
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton
It's the go home show for Money in the Bank and the ladder match is set with all seven of its competitors. As announced on WWE.com, six of the participants will be in singles matches tonight, including a rematch from last week with Orton vs. Sheamus. Hopefully we get more solid mic work from Ambrose and Rollins as well. Let's get to it.
Here's Cena, with a broken nose, to open things up. Cena talks about some of the biggest events in WWE: Hogan vs. Rock, the Streak and the Money in the Bank ladder match. That's uh, quite the collection. Those in the ladder match are fighting for an opportunity on the same night two people will be fighting in the same ring with one getting an opportunity of his own.
Kevin Owens thinks Cena's time is up and his time is now but this Sunday Cena will be fighting for everyone that believes in him as well as those people who think he sucks. This Sunday he proves that he is still the face that runs this place because he is John Cena. Cue Owens who says that Cena is just proving his point. Cena is delusional if he thinks he's winning on Sunday or if the fans are interested in seeing an open challenge for the US Title.
People have been watching Cena come out to open Raw for ten years now and some people must be sick of it. Instead, let's have an NXT Title Open Challenge instead. Cena loves the idea and says he accepts. Owens says no because Cena is already facing him on Sunday so no match tonight. They accuse each other of being delusional and Cena issues his own Open Challenge and looks right at Owens as he says come get some.
Owens has another idea: whoever comes down the ramp next gets to pick which title they want to fight for. Cue Neville, who says he would love to fight John Cena.....one day. Owens is a prize fighter, but Neville knows what it takes to hold that prize. Therefore, Neville will take that NXT Title shot right now.
NXT Title: Kevin Owens vs. Neville
Owens is defending of course and John Cena is making a rare appearance on commentary. The champ goes right to the floor but Neville follows him out for some kicks to the ribs. Back in and a nice running hurricanrana sends Owens back to the floor for the big moonsault dive. They get back in again and Owens just slugs Neville down and hits a wicked Cannonball for two.
We hit the chinlock and Cena gets in a great line by saying no one talks about the minor league home run champion because they'd rather talk about Babe Ruth. A backsplash gets two for Kevin and a belly to back gets the same as Cena is coming off as one of the most polished commentators I've ever heard. Back with Neville countering an AA into a DDT to get a breather.
The big Asai moonsault barely grazes Kevin's arm (it wasn't clear who screwed up) so Neville has to settle for a middle rope dropkick for two. Back up and Owens ducks a kick and grabs the arm, lifting Neville up into something like a brainbuster onto the knee. Owens doesn't use that one often but it looked great. Neville comes back with the delayed German but Owens crotches him to break up the Red Arrow. The Pop Up Powerbomb retains the title at 14:00.
Video on Rollins vs. Neville at Elimination Chamber and the resulting aftermath that set up Sunday's ladder match.
WWE praises itself for having a half billion social media followers because that means they're awesome and TOTALLY EQUAL TO EVERY OTHER MAJOR ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY EVER.
Rollins comes up to the Authority and implies they're all in trouble on Sunday but Stephanie brings up what Rollins said last week about not needing the two of them. They'll be there on Sunday but not at ringside. However, tonight Seth can pick his own opponent.
We recap Paige getting screwed by Twin Magic last week and her ensuing promo ripping into the Bellas dominating the Divas division for way too long. She's promised to change the division forever.
Nikki Bella says Paige is projecting her frustration onto the twins and is sure the Bellas have never held anyone back. Maybe this is Paige's house, but it's the Bellas' world.
Summer Rae vs. Nikki Bella
Non-title. A quick rollup gets two for Nikki but it's time for some pushups. Summer comes back with a cobra clutch for a bit before Nikki fights up and hits the Rack Attack for the pin at 2:19.
We recap Reigns having to win three times last week to retain his Money in the Bank spot.
Here's Reigns with something to say. He talks about hating that briefcase for so long because of who it was attached to. Now it doesn't sound so bad though because he's going to pull it down and cash in against Dean Ambrose some day down the line. Cue Kane who says he's in the ladder match on Sunday to protect the Authority's interests. Reigns offers Kane a chance to come in right now for a demonstration in breaking jaws but here's Dolph Ziggler to interrupt.
Kane isn't getting in the ring right now because the Authority hasn't pulled his strings. After taking forever to call Kane a tool, Ziggler says he's going to win on Sunday. Kane reminds Dolph about the dangers of certain tools and reminds him that everyone is in singles matches against each other tonight. Well minus Neville of course. This brings out R-Truth for some reason but a confused Kane tells him that he isn't in the match. R-Truth: Are you sure? Kane: Yeah. Truth: My bad. And he's gone.
Kane tries to continue but gets cut off by New Day. They promise that Kofi will pull the briefcase down using the power of positivity, making all of them Mr. Money in the Bank because NEW DAY ROCKS! This brings out Sheamus, who laughs at the idea of anyone else winning this Sunday. He'll be one Brogue Kick away from becoming champion all over again. Kane finally gets to introduce Orton, who comes out as scheduled. This was basically just a way to remind us of who is in on Sunday.
Randy Orton vs. Sheamus
Rematch from last week where Sheamus was disqualified. Orton quickly takes it to the floor for some shots tot he ribs before hitting the Stomp back inside. Sheamus bails outside again and is whipped hard into the barricade for his efforts. Back in and a neck snap across the top rope gives Sheamus control so he slaps on an armbar. Quite the power brawler indeed. Orton fights back but gets knocked to the floor as we take a break.
Back with Sheamus driving a knee into the ribs and slapping on a chinlock to slow things down again. Sheamus slowly walks around so Orton slugs away and hits the t-bone suplex. The elevated DDT connects but both guys miss finishers. Instead it's a clothesline to send Sheamus outside, only to have Sheamus throw him over the table. Just like last week, Sheamus busts out a chair but eats a right hand to the ribs. Orton throws the chair at Sheamus' ribs and that's a DQ at 13:13.
Post match Orton stomps Sheamus' head on the steps (insert your own Curb Stomp joke here) and hits an RKO.
The Stooges annoy Rollins as they ask to be in his corner on Sunday. They're huge morons and he doesn't need them on Sunday, so Jamie says screw you. They're Shield 2.0 with Mercury as an upgrade over Reigns and Noble being better than Ambrose. Rollins is a son of a gun and would be nothing without the Authority. That's enough to earn the Stooges a match against the champ tonight. Jamie and Rollins slap each other and Mercury has to break it up before threatening Rollins for later.
Kane vs. Dolph Ziggler
Neither guy gets an entrance and it's Ziggler starting fast, only to be uppercut out of the air. With Lana looking on we hit the chinlock to slow the match down again. Kane slugs him down in the corner as the crowd gets even quieter with every Kane right hand. A side slam gets two and we stop to look at Lana again. Kane boots Dolph's head off for two and we take a break. Back with Ziggler fighting out of a bearhug and nailing a superkick to put both guys down. Lana applauds and here's Rusev to distract her, causing Lana to fall off the ramp and hurt her ankle. The distraction lets Kane nail a chokeslam for the pin at 9:46.
Lana gets her ankle checked and is prescribed ice.
It's time for MizTV, starting with a clip of Ryback and Big Show getting into it last week. Naturally Ryback and Big Show are the guests tonight, starting with Ryback who interrupts Miz's introduction. Miz lists off his resume and Ryback cuts him off again because he's sick of hearing all these lines over and over again. They argue a bit until Big Show cuts them off as only he can.
Show talks about how he can take everything he wants anytime he wants so Ryback says come get this title. They stare each other down and Big Show yells at Miz, who jumps the giant. Miz is thrown down so Ryback Shell Shocks Show. Why they didn't SAVE THAT FOR THE FREAKING MATCH is beyond me but then again Big Show and Kane are featured in big matches in 2015 so I shouldn't be that surprised.
We recap the makings of the handicap match.
Luke Harper/Erick Rowan vs. Los Matadores
Rowan throws Diego around to start and brings in Harper to run over Fernando. Back to Rowan to knock Torito off the apron, meaning there's no one for Fernando to tag. A 3D (The Way) ends Fernando at 2:15.
Harper gets a mic and says tick tock tick tock because the time to pay for your sins is coming. The judgment is waiting at your door. Rowan says it's ok to be afraid because you should be.
Kane comes in to see Rollins and laughs about the Instagram photos Ambrose has been posting of himself with the title all around New Orleans. Yeah I've ignored these stupid things all night but they're little more than WWE saying HEY! DID YOU KNOW WE HAVE A LOT OF FOLLOWES ON SOCIAL MEDIA??? BECAUSE WE TOTALLY DO! Kane threatens to cash in on Sunday and they bicker. Again.
More social media stats and another Ambrose picture. These are now being used to announce that Dean will be here tonight. Ignore that the ticket in the picture clearly says COMP.
Trailer for Ted 2.
Big E. vs. Titus O'Neil
Woods calls Big E. the Minister of Mass. E. gets a quick two off a belly to belly and hammers away at the bald head. An abdominal stretch lets Big E. slap Titus' stomach for the NEW DAY ROCKS clap. Titus fights back with some chops in the corner and an old Pounce ala Monty Brown, only to have the partners get in a fight on the floor. That distraction lets Big E. hit the Big Ending for the pin at 3:13.
Roman Reigns vs. Kofi Kingston
Kofi's wristlock doesn't work very well and Reigns wristlocks him to the floor. The other New Day members offer a distraction to let Kofi take over but Reigns fights back again and sends Kofi outside one more time. The apron kick looks to set up Reigns' big dive but he has to settle for a running clothesline off the steps to take out Woods. Kofi slides back in for a nice baseball slide and we take a break.
Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock so it's right back to another chinlock. Kofi goes up for a nice top rope ax handle as Woods will not shut up (in a good way). Reigns makes his comeback with a bunch of clotheslines and a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. The SOS is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two more but he has to take out Woods and Big E. A rollup gets two for Kofi but he dives into the Superman Punch for the pin at 12:07.
Reigns grabs a chair and Ambrose comes to sit down, carrying popcorn and a Pepsi.
Jamie Noble/Joey Mercury vs. Seth Rollins
Kane is out with the Stooges. Mercury spins out of a wristlock to start but Seth does the same thing and sends Joey into the mat. The Stooges take a breather on the floor but Kane offers a distraction to let them get in some double teaming. Ambrose pours popcorn on Seth's head, allowing Joey to nail a nice dropkick for one, followed by an armdrag into an armbar. Seth throws him outside and laughs at Dean a bit before putting on a chinlock at 11:08pm.
Rollins misses a charge in the corner and the hot tag brings in Noble to clean house, completel with his little dance. The swinging neckbreaker gets two and the Stooges try the Rick Rude Wrestlemania V pin for a VERY close two, but Jamie eats a low superkick to change control again. Mercury gets buckle bombed into his partner and Seth loads up the Pedigree, only for Dean to get up and throw the title in. The distraction lets Joey get a rollup for the pin at 9:00. Yes, this match that started in the overrun got NINE MINUTES.
Dean hits Dirty Deeds to take the title back and climbs a ladder to end the show.
Results
Kevin Owens b. Neville Pop Up Powerbomb
Nikki Bella b. Summer Rae Rack Attack
Sheamus b. Randy Orton via DQ when Orton threw a chair
Kane b. Dolph Ziggler Chokeslam
Luke Harper/Erick Rowan b. Los Matadores The Way to Fernando
Big E. b. Titus O'Neil Big Ending
Roman Reigns b. Kofi Kingston Superman Punch
Jamie Noble/Joey Mercury b. Seth Rollins Rollup
Tuesday
Nothing.
Wednesday
NXT
Date: June 10, 2015
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Rich Brennan, Byron Saxton
The big story tonight is the in ring debut of Samoa Joe, who debuted a few weeks back and has had some intense staredowns with NXT Champion Kevin Owens. It should be interesting to see who Joe's first victim is, because it's fairly clear that he's coming for Owens and the title. Right now though, Finn Balor is the #1 contender and will be facing Owens for the title in Tokyo on July 4. Let's get to it.
The opening video is all about Joe debuting in NXT and setting his sights on the title.
Opening sequence.
Zack Ryder/Mojo Rawley vs. Mike Rallis/Elias Samson
Ryder is WAY over here and the fans even seem happy to see Rawley. Mojo shoves Rallis down, slams Samson, but then stop, HAMMER TIME. Ryder comes in and takes some shoulders in the ribs, only to raise his knees in the corner to stop a charge. The middle rope dropkick sets up the Broski Boot but Samson offers a distraction to take over.
We hit the chinlock but a GET HYPED chant brings Ryder to his feet for the hot tag to Rawley. Mojo cleans house with some very fast paced offense, including a big running punch and capped off by a middle rope Hart Attack with the Rough Ryder instead of the clothesline for the pin on Samson at 3:55.
Finn Balor promo with his voice talking about how everyone has two sides. Shots of the demon paint keep appearing until FINN BALOR ARRIVES July 4 in Tokyo comes on screen. Oh that's going to be amazing.
Dana Brooke video. She's the Total Diva.
Emma vs. Blue Pants
SHE'S BAAAAACK! Big Cass' Price Is Right entrance music got one of the loudest reactions in recent weeks. The fans are smart enough to know that it's Blue Pants' birthday. Emma jumps her to start, making her the most hated woman in the promotion. A dropkick gets two and we hit the bow and arrow on Blue Pants. Fans: BLUE PANTS ROCKS! Blue Pants gets some rollups for two but it's back to the chinlock. Emma drops an elbow to the back of the head for two more but Blue Pants comes back with some kicks to the head. Blue Pants gets going but Emma trips her down and the Emma Lock gets the submission at 4:40.
Enzo, Cass and Carmella say that Blake/Murphy/Bliss wouldn't last one week in the Hunger Games and if they grew up where they're from, it would be time to go live with Uncle Phil. Six person tag next week.
Tyler Breeze vs. Bull Dempsey
Dempsey knees him in the head to start and we're quickly in a chinlock. Fans: BULL IS GORGEOUS/NO HE'S NOT! Back up and the standing splash sets up the top rope headbutt but Breeze rolls away before the jump. Breeze gets him in a chance around the ring and Bull keeps getting winded. Fans: CARDIO! CARDIO! Breeze laps Bull, throws him inside and gives him a Beauty Shot for the pin at 2:49. Tyler is basically a face now due to all of his hard work and string of good matches.
We look back at Becky Lynch's standing ovation after losing to Sasha Banks. Brennan's nickname for her: The Lass Kicker. As much as I hate myself for this, I kind of dig that name.
Becky Lynch vs. Jesse McKay
Becky has a very high energy entrance now, complete with smoke along the entrance. The fans are responding to it and it's easy to seey why. McKay used to wrestle in Shimmer under the same name. Jesse gets in a kick to the ribs to start, followed by another to the face. An armbar has Becky in some trouble but she comes back with a hammerlock suplex and some legdrops. BETTER THAN HOGAN! Let's not get crazy here. Something like a torture rack Samoan drop sets up the armbar (Rich: The Disgoosted Armbar! Graves: The WHAT?) for the submission at 4:16.
Regal announces that Owens will be on commentary for Joe's match but Bull Dempsey comes in eating a bag of Doritos. He blames his loss on a lack of sleep. Regal gets serious and tells Dempsey to get his act together. The boss leaves so Dempsey pulls an open Snickers out of his singlet. Well they had to do something new with Dempsey so this works well enough.
Jason Jordan says he has another partner when Chad Gable comes in, saying it should be him. I'm ready, willing and Gable. See what I did there? Jason says no but Gable adds his name to Jordan's locker.
Baron Corbin vs. Angelo Dawkins
Corbin throws him around to start and walks him around the ring before a slam. A bulldog attempt is countered by a huge clothesline and End of Days gives Baron the pin at 2:29.
Samoa Joe vs. Scott Dawson
Owens is on commentary and Joe's music still sucks. He does however look a bit more toned. Fans: PLEASE DON'T DIE! How nice of them to be worried about Joe's safety. They trade armbars to start until Joe takes it up a notch with a back elbow to the face. Owens: Wow a back elbow! I've got a mean back elbow. The release Rock Bottom out of the corner sets up the Muscle Buster for the pin on Dawson at 3:45.
During the replays, Kevin offers to get Brennan a Joe shirt from the merchandise table. Owens goes to leave but Joe calls him to the ring. Kevin won't get in because he's a good man who won't drop Joe after his first match. Joe is a rookie here in NXT and one win isn't enough for an NXT Title match. Cue Regal who agrees with Owens. Joe hasn't earned a title shot, but he's earned the right to a non-title fight against Owens next week.
Results
Zack Ryder/Mojo Rawley b. Elias Samson/Mike Rallis Middle rope Rough Ryder to Samson
Emma b. Blue Pants Emma Lock
Tyler Breeze b. Bull Dempsey Beauty Shot
Becky Lynch b. Jesse McKay Disgoosted Armbar
Baron Corbin b. Angelo Dawkins End of Days
Samoa Joe b. Scott Dawson Muscle Buster
Impact Wrestling
Date: June 10, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D'Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
We're closing in on Slammiversary and the big story is the announcement of the World Title match between champion Kurt Angle and new #1 contender Ethan Carter III. However, tonight is Destination X, meaning Rockstar Spud is getting the World Title shot against Angle. Other than that, we have the continuation of the best of five series for the Tag Team Titles between the Dirty Heels (who are finally acting like heels) and the Wolves. Let's get to it.
We open with a video on the X-Division as a whole before focusing on Spud cashing in. However, Austin Aries is cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase on the winner. There will also be three triple threats with the winners fighting in another triple threat for the title at a future date.
It's time for the World Title match but Ethan Carter III and Tyrus cut Christy off. Ethan is livid that he isn't getting the shot tonight so he's staging an old fashioned sit-in. He dares anyone to come get him out of here so Kurt Angle comes to the ring. Angle gets all serious and threatens ankle pain to get Carter out of the ring.
TNA World Title: Rockstar Spud vs. Kurt Angle
Kurt is defending and takes Spud down to the mat with ease for a headlock. Back up and Spud is able to send Angle outside, only to eat a belly to belly on the floor for a huge crash. Angle takes it back inside and nails another suplex to set up a chinlock. An Angle Slam attempt is countered and Spud scores with an enziguri.
Spud slugs away and tosses Kurt to the floor, setting up a huge flip dive off the top. A superplex plants Spud back inside but he's still able to escape the Angle Slam. There's a running forearm to Kurt but he grabs an ankle lock, only to have Spud roll away into an Underdog attempt. Kurt charges into the post and eats the Underdog for a VERY close two, which shocks Spud. There's the ankle lock with the grapevine and Spud taps at 8:35.
Here's the Dollhouse to call out Awesome Kong. Taryn is willing to bare all to see who the toughest Knockout is, meaning Kong has to compete for the title in a lingerie pillow fight. They have the lingerie ready for her and it's the only way she gets a shot.
Manik vs. Low Ki vs. Crazzy Steve
Winner advances to the X-Division Title match at a later date. Manik goes after Steve to start but Ki breaks up Manik's suicide dive. Back in and Manik uppercuts both guys until Steve jumps into his arms, only to have Ki hit a springboard spinning kick to the face. Something like a Codebreaker gets two on Ki with Steve making the save. Steve misses a high cross body and gets kicked into Manik in the corner, setting up the Warrior's Way to Manik to give Ki the pin at 3:28.
Grado is warming up for his triple threat later but he needs to lose weight to become X-Division. He teases some Parkour but doesn't quite make it work. This is the guy that was supposed to be the most awesome thing ever? Not bad but really?
Recap of James Storm possibly murdering Mickie James last week. Apparently she wasn't physically hurt.
Tigre Uno vs. DJZ vs. Mandrews
We start with the triple headlock with Tigre speeding things up to take over. DJZ dropkicks him down though, only to have Mandrews slingshot in for a hurricanrana. A standing moonsault gets two on DJZ but Tigre comes in with a missile dropkick. Tigre slams DJZ down for two but Mandrews comes back in with a tornado DDT to put everyone down. DJZ is up first for a running flip dive to the floor to take out both guys again. Back in and Tigre shoves DJZ off the top and hits a Phoenix Splash (read as a spinning knee to the face) to pin Mandrews at 5:27.
Post match Jesse Godderz comes down to destroy DJZ.
Grado continues to try to lose weight. He asks Tigre for some tips but there's a language barrier. Grado leaves and Tigre calls him a jackass.
Knockouts Title: Taryn Terrell vs. Awesome Kong
Taryn is defending and this is a lingerie pillow fight. There's a bed in the ring for the Dollhouse and Taryn laughs at the idea of Kong having to wear the lingerie. Kong comes out in her regular gear, much to Taryn's annoyance. Marti and Jade are pulled to the floor for a beating so Taryn says the fans don't get to see her in lingerie. What a tease I am!
Cue Brooke to say Taryn promised a title defense tonight and she's ready anytime. Brooke shoves her down and the catfight is on as Kong is off making Jade and Marti into toothpicks. Taryn is disrobed and runs off. No match of course.
The Dirty Heels are ready for their tag match later, but Roode wants the first World Title shot.
Grado weighs in but strips off his singlet first. JB tells him there's no weight limit so he's good to go. I've seen worse.
Grado vs. Kenny King vs. Cruz
It's a big brawl to start with Cruz being thrown to the floor and Grado getting kicked in the face. Cruz eats two running boots in the corner but Grado pounds on King's back. We hit a chinlock on Grado for a bit before Cruz fails at lifting him up for a suplex. King kicks Grado in the face, leaving Cruz to cross body Kenny for two. There's a Royal Flush to Cruz but Grado slugs away on Kenny, only to eat a chop to the chest. The Royal Flush doesn't work on Grado, who sends Kenny outside and nails a Cannonball on Cruz for the pin at 5:18. Josh: What a win and what a company!
Bram takes over a camera and says he's going to the ring to make history.
After a break, here's Bram to run down the X-Division and issue an open challenge to anyone who wants to fight in a six sided ring.
Bram vs. Crimson
Uh....sure. Crimson not being around for the better part of a few years is treated like getting a free coffee from a Shell station. Bram slugs him to the floor but Crimson takes over back inside. That sends Bram outside for a stroll, where he sends Crimson into the barricade. Back in and Bram scores with a kind of t-bone suplex, followed by a Rings of Saturn with a neck crank. Bram makes the ropes and hits the Brighter Side of Suffering for the pin at 4:38.
Kurt Angle says he'll win.
Ethan Carter III says when he throws the first punch, Angle isn't getting up.
TNA World Title: Austin Aries vs. Kurt Angle
Aries is cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase to get the title shot. Feeling out process to start until Aries clotheslines him down for two and nails a right hand in the corner. Aries flips out of a German and nails a low dropkick as we take a break. Back with Angle rolling Germans but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT for two. There's the Last Chancery but Angle escapes and grabs an ankle lock, only to have Aries make the ropes.
The discus elbow is countered into an Angle Slam for two. Angle misses the moonsault and gets caught in another Last Chancery, which really doesn't look as good as they're hoping for. The 450 is broken up by Angle running the ropes but Aries shoves him off for the 450 and a very near fall. Another Angle Slam is countered with two discus forearms but the brainbuster only gets two with Kurt putting a foot on the ropes.
There's an ankle lock on the champion but he counters into one of his own. Aries rolls Kurt to the floor for a suicide dive, which goes right into the barricade. Austin is out cold and it's another Angle Slam, only to have Aries counter into a rollup for two. Now the ankle lock with the grapevine makes Austin tap at 18:00.
Ethan Carter III comes in and lays Angle out to end the show.
Results
Kurt Angle b. Rockstar Spud Ankle lock
Low Ki b. Manik and Crazzy Steve Warrior's Way to Manik
Tigre Uno b. DJZ and Mandrews Phoenix Splash to Mandrews
Grado b. Kenny King and Cruz Cannonball to Cruz
Bram b. Crimson Brighter Side of Suffering
Kurt Angle b. Austin Aries Ankle lock
Monday Night Raw
Date: June 8, 2015
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton
It's the go home show for Money in the Bank and the ladder match is set with all seven of its competitors. As announced on WWE.com, six of the participants will be in singles matches tonight, including a rematch from last week with Orton vs. Sheamus. Hopefully we get more solid mic work from Ambrose and Rollins as well. Let's get to it.
Here's Cena, with a broken nose, to open things up. Cena talks about some of the biggest events in WWE: Hogan vs. Rock, the Streak and the Money in the Bank ladder match. That's uh, quite the collection. Those in the ladder match are fighting for an opportunity on the same night two people will be fighting in the same ring with one getting an opportunity of his own.
Kevin Owens thinks Cena's time is up and his time is now but this Sunday Cena will be fighting for everyone that believes in him as well as those people who think he sucks. This Sunday he proves that he is still the face that runs this place because he is John Cena. Cue Owens who says that Cena is just proving his point. Cena is delusional if he thinks he's winning on Sunday or if the fans are interested in seeing an open challenge for the US Title.
People have been watching Cena come out to open Raw for ten years now and some people must be sick of it. Instead, let's have an NXT Title Open Challenge instead. Cena loves the idea and says he accepts. Owens says no because Cena is already facing him on Sunday so no match tonight. They accuse each other of being delusional and Cena issues his own Open Challenge and looks right at Owens as he says come get some.
Owens has another idea: whoever comes down the ramp next gets to pick which title they want to fight for. Cue Neville, who says he would love to fight John Cena.....one day. Owens is a prize fighter, but Neville knows what it takes to hold that prize. Therefore, Neville will take that NXT Title shot right now.
NXT Title: Kevin Owens vs. Neville
Owens is defending of course and John Cena is making a rare appearance on commentary. The champ goes right to the floor but Neville follows him out for some kicks to the ribs. Back in and a nice running hurricanrana sends Owens back to the floor for the big moonsault dive. They get back in again and Owens just slugs Neville down and hits a wicked Cannonball for two.
We hit the chinlock and Cena gets in a great line by saying no one talks about the minor league home run champion because they'd rather talk about Babe Ruth. A backsplash gets two for Kevin and a belly to back gets the same as Cena is coming off as one of the most polished commentators I've ever heard. Back with Neville countering an AA into a DDT to get a breather.
The big Asai moonsault barely grazes Kevin's arm (it wasn't clear who screwed up) so Neville has to settle for a middle rope dropkick for two. Back up and Owens ducks a kick and grabs the arm, lifting Neville up into something like a brainbuster onto the knee. Owens doesn't use that one often but it looked great. Neville comes back with the delayed German but Owens crotches him to break up the Red Arrow. The Pop Up Powerbomb retains the title at 14:00.
Video on Rollins vs. Neville at Elimination Chamber and the resulting aftermath that set up Sunday's ladder match.
WWE praises itself for having a half billion social media followers because that means they're awesome and TOTALLY EQUAL TO EVERY OTHER MAJOR ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY EVER.
Rollins comes up to the Authority and implies they're all in trouble on Sunday but Stephanie brings up what Rollins said last week about not needing the two of them. They'll be there on Sunday but not at ringside. However, tonight Seth can pick his own opponent.
We recap Paige getting screwed by Twin Magic last week and her ensuing promo ripping into the Bellas dominating the Divas division for way too long. She's promised to change the division forever.
Nikki Bella says Paige is projecting her frustration onto the twins and is sure the Bellas have never held anyone back. Maybe this is Paige's house, but it's the Bellas' world.
Summer Rae vs. Nikki Bella
Non-title. A quick rollup gets two for Nikki but it's time for some pushups. Summer comes back with a cobra clutch for a bit before Nikki fights up and hits the Rack Attack for the pin at 2:19.
We recap Reigns having to win three times last week to retain his Money in the Bank spot.
Here's Reigns with something to say. He talks about hating that briefcase for so long because of who it was attached to. Now it doesn't sound so bad though because he's going to pull it down and cash in against Dean Ambrose some day down the line. Cue Kane who says he's in the ladder match on Sunday to protect the Authority's interests. Reigns offers Kane a chance to come in right now for a demonstration in breaking jaws but here's Dolph Ziggler to interrupt.
Kane isn't getting in the ring right now because the Authority hasn't pulled his strings. After taking forever to call Kane a tool, Ziggler says he's going to win on Sunday. Kane reminds Dolph about the dangers of certain tools and reminds him that everyone is in singles matches against each other tonight. Well minus Neville of course. This brings out R-Truth for some reason but a confused Kane tells him that he isn't in the match. R-Truth: Are you sure? Kane: Yeah. Truth: My bad. And he's gone.
Kane tries to continue but gets cut off by New Day. They promise that Kofi will pull the briefcase down using the power of positivity, making all of them Mr. Money in the Bank because NEW DAY ROCKS! This brings out Sheamus, who laughs at the idea of anyone else winning this Sunday. He'll be one Brogue Kick away from becoming champion all over again. Kane finally gets to introduce Orton, who comes out as scheduled. This was basically just a way to remind us of who is in on Sunday.
Randy Orton vs. Sheamus
Rematch from last week where Sheamus was disqualified. Orton quickly takes it to the floor for some shots tot he ribs before hitting the Stomp back inside. Sheamus bails outside again and is whipped hard into the barricade for his efforts. Back in and a neck snap across the top rope gives Sheamus control so he slaps on an armbar. Quite the power brawler indeed. Orton fights back but gets knocked to the floor as we take a break.
Back with Sheamus driving a knee into the ribs and slapping on a chinlock to slow things down again. Sheamus slowly walks around so Orton slugs away and hits the t-bone suplex. The elevated DDT connects but both guys miss finishers. Instead it's a clothesline to send Sheamus outside, only to have Sheamus throw him over the table. Just like last week, Sheamus busts out a chair but eats a right hand to the ribs. Orton throws the chair at Sheamus' ribs and that's a DQ at 13:13.
Post match Orton stomps Sheamus' head on the steps (insert your own Curb Stomp joke here) and hits an RKO.
The Stooges annoy Rollins as they ask to be in his corner on Sunday. They're huge morons and he doesn't need them on Sunday, so Jamie says screw you. They're Shield 2.0 with Mercury as an upgrade over Reigns and Noble being better than Ambrose. Rollins is a son of a gun and would be nothing without the Authority. That's enough to earn the Stooges a match against the champ tonight. Jamie and Rollins slap each other and Mercury has to break it up before threatening Rollins for later.
Kane vs. Dolph Ziggler
Neither guy gets an entrance and it's Ziggler starting fast, only to be uppercut out of the air. With Lana looking on we hit the chinlock to slow the match down again. Kane slugs him down in the corner as the crowd gets even quieter with every Kane right hand. A side slam gets two and we stop to look at Lana again. Kane boots Dolph's head off for two and we take a break. Back with Ziggler fighting out of a bearhug and nailing a superkick to put both guys down. Lana applauds and here's Rusev to distract her, causing Lana to fall off the ramp and hurt her ankle. The distraction lets Kane nail a chokeslam for the pin at 9:46.
Lana gets her ankle checked and is prescribed ice.
It's time for MizTV, starting with a clip of Ryback and Big Show getting into it last week. Naturally Ryback and Big Show are the guests tonight, starting with Ryback who interrupts Miz's introduction. Miz lists off his resume and Ryback cuts him off again because he's sick of hearing all these lines over and over again. They argue a bit until Big Show cuts them off as only he can.
Show talks about how he can take everything he wants anytime he wants so Ryback says come get this title. They stare each other down and Big Show yells at Miz, who jumps the giant. Miz is thrown down so Ryback Shell Shocks Show. Why they didn't SAVE THAT FOR THE FREAKING MATCH is beyond me but then again Big Show and Kane are featured in big matches in 2015 so I shouldn't be that surprised.
We recap the makings of the handicap match.
Luke Harper/Erick Rowan vs. Los Matadores
Rowan throws Diego around to start and brings in Harper to run over Fernando. Back to Rowan to knock Torito off the apron, meaning there's no one for Fernando to tag. A 3D (The Way) ends Fernando at 2:15.
Harper gets a mic and says tick tock tick tock because the time to pay for your sins is coming. The judgment is waiting at your door. Rowan says it's ok to be afraid because you should be.
Kane comes in to see Rollins and laughs about the Instagram photos Ambrose has been posting of himself with the title all around New Orleans. Yeah I've ignored these stupid things all night but they're little more than WWE saying HEY! DID YOU KNOW WE HAVE A LOT OF FOLLOWES ON SOCIAL MEDIA??? BECAUSE WE TOTALLY DO! Kane threatens to cash in on Sunday and they bicker. Again.
More social media stats and another Ambrose picture. These are now being used to announce that Dean will be here tonight. Ignore that the ticket in the picture clearly says COMP.
Trailer for Ted 2.
Big E. vs. Titus O'Neil
Woods calls Big E. the Minister of Mass. E. gets a quick two off a belly to belly and hammers away at the bald head. An abdominal stretch lets Big E. slap Titus' stomach for the NEW DAY ROCKS clap. Titus fights back with some chops in the corner and an old Pounce ala Monty Brown, only to have the partners get in a fight on the floor. That distraction lets Big E. hit the Big Ending for the pin at 3:13.
Roman Reigns vs. Kofi Kingston
Kofi's wristlock doesn't work very well and Reigns wristlocks him to the floor. The other New Day members offer a distraction to let Kofi take over but Reigns fights back again and sends Kofi outside one more time. The apron kick looks to set up Reigns' big dive but he has to settle for a running clothesline off the steps to take out Woods. Kofi slides back in for a nice baseball slide and we take a break.
Back with Reigns fighting out of a chinlock so it's right back to another chinlock. Kofi goes up for a nice top rope ax handle as Woods will not shut up (in a good way). Reigns makes his comeback with a bunch of clotheslines and a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. The SOS is countered into a sitout powerbomb for two more but he has to take out Woods and Big E. A rollup gets two for Kofi but he dives into the Superman Punch for the pin at 12:07.
Reigns grabs a chair and Ambrose comes to sit down, carrying popcorn and a Pepsi.
Jamie Noble/Joey Mercury vs. Seth Rollins
Kane is out with the Stooges. Mercury spins out of a wristlock to start but Seth does the same thing and sends Joey into the mat. The Stooges take a breather on the floor but Kane offers a distraction to let them get in some double teaming. Ambrose pours popcorn on Seth's head, allowing Joey to nail a nice dropkick for one, followed by an armdrag into an armbar. Seth throws him outside and laughs at Dean a bit before putting on a chinlock at 11:08pm.
Rollins misses a charge in the corner and the hot tag brings in Noble to clean house, completel with his little dance. The swinging neckbreaker gets two and the Stooges try the Rick Rude Wrestlemania V pin for a VERY close two, but Jamie eats a low superkick to change control again. Mercury gets buckle bombed into his partner and Seth loads up the Pedigree, only for Dean to get up and throw the title in. The distraction lets Joey get a rollup for the pin at 9:00. Yes, this match that started in the overrun got NINE MINUTES.
Dean hits Dirty Deeds to take the title back and climbs a ladder to end the show.
Results
Kevin Owens b. Neville Pop Up Powerbomb
Nikki Bella b. Summer Rae Rack Attack
Sheamus b. Randy Orton via DQ when Orton threw a chair
Kane b. Dolph Ziggler Chokeslam
Luke Harper/Erick Rowan b. Los Matadores The Way to Fernando
Big E. b. Titus O'Neil Big Ending
Roman Reigns b. Kofi Kingston Superman Punch
Jamie Noble/Joey Mercury b. Seth Rollins Rollup
Tuesday
Nothing.
Wednesday
NXT
Date: June 10, 2015
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Rich Brennan, Byron Saxton
The big story tonight is the in ring debut of Samoa Joe, who debuted a few weeks back and has had some intense staredowns with NXT Champion Kevin Owens. It should be interesting to see who Joe's first victim is, because it's fairly clear that he's coming for Owens and the title. Right now though, Finn Balor is the #1 contender and will be facing Owens for the title in Tokyo on July 4. Let's get to it.
The opening video is all about Joe debuting in NXT and setting his sights on the title.
Opening sequence.
Zack Ryder/Mojo Rawley vs. Mike Rallis/Elias Samson
Ryder is WAY over here and the fans even seem happy to see Rawley. Mojo shoves Rallis down, slams Samson, but then stop, HAMMER TIME. Ryder comes in and takes some shoulders in the ribs, only to raise his knees in the corner to stop a charge. The middle rope dropkick sets up the Broski Boot but Samson offers a distraction to take over.
We hit the chinlock but a GET HYPED chant brings Ryder to his feet for the hot tag to Rawley. Mojo cleans house with some very fast paced offense, including a big running punch and capped off by a middle rope Hart Attack with the Rough Ryder instead of the clothesline for the pin on Samson at 3:55.
Finn Balor promo with his voice talking about how everyone has two sides. Shots of the demon paint keep appearing until FINN BALOR ARRIVES July 4 in Tokyo comes on screen. Oh that's going to be amazing.
Dana Brooke video. She's the Total Diva.
Emma vs. Blue Pants
SHE'S BAAAAACK! Big Cass' Price Is Right entrance music got one of the loudest reactions in recent weeks. The fans are smart enough to know that it's Blue Pants' birthday. Emma jumps her to start, making her the most hated woman in the promotion. A dropkick gets two and we hit the bow and arrow on Blue Pants. Fans: BLUE PANTS ROCKS! Blue Pants gets some rollups for two but it's back to the chinlock. Emma drops an elbow to the back of the head for two more but Blue Pants comes back with some kicks to the head. Blue Pants gets going but Emma trips her down and the Emma Lock gets the submission at 4:40.
Enzo, Cass and Carmella say that Blake/Murphy/Bliss wouldn't last one week in the Hunger Games and if they grew up where they're from, it would be time to go live with Uncle Phil. Six person tag next week.
Tyler Breeze vs. Bull Dempsey
Dempsey knees him in the head to start and we're quickly in a chinlock. Fans: BULL IS GORGEOUS/NO HE'S NOT! Back up and the standing splash sets up the top rope headbutt but Breeze rolls away before the jump. Breeze gets him in a chance around the ring and Bull keeps getting winded. Fans: CARDIO! CARDIO! Breeze laps Bull, throws him inside and gives him a Beauty Shot for the pin at 2:49. Tyler is basically a face now due to all of his hard work and string of good matches.
We look back at Becky Lynch's standing ovation after losing to Sasha Banks. Brennan's nickname for her: The Lass Kicker. As much as I hate myself for this, I kind of dig that name.
Becky Lynch vs. Jesse McKay
Becky has a very high energy entrance now, complete with smoke along the entrance. The fans are responding to it and it's easy to seey why. McKay used to wrestle in Shimmer under the same name. Jesse gets in a kick to the ribs to start, followed by another to the face. An armbar has Becky in some trouble but she comes back with a hammerlock suplex and some legdrops. BETTER THAN HOGAN! Let's not get crazy here. Something like a torture rack Samoan drop sets up the armbar (Rich: The Disgoosted Armbar! Graves: The WHAT?) for the submission at 4:16.
Regal announces that Owens will be on commentary for Joe's match but Bull Dempsey comes in eating a bag of Doritos. He blames his loss on a lack of sleep. Regal gets serious and tells Dempsey to get his act together. The boss leaves so Dempsey pulls an open Snickers out of his singlet. Well they had to do something new with Dempsey so this works well enough.
Jason Jordan says he has another partner when Chad Gable comes in, saying it should be him. I'm ready, willing and Gable. See what I did there? Jason says no but Gable adds his name to Jordan's locker.
Baron Corbin vs. Angelo Dawkins
Corbin throws him around to start and walks him around the ring before a slam. A bulldog attempt is countered by a huge clothesline and End of Days gives Baron the pin at 2:29.
Samoa Joe vs. Scott Dawson
Owens is on commentary and Joe's music still sucks. He does however look a bit more toned. Fans: PLEASE DON'T DIE! How nice of them to be worried about Joe's safety. They trade armbars to start until Joe takes it up a notch with a back elbow to the face. Owens: Wow a back elbow! I've got a mean back elbow. The release Rock Bottom out of the corner sets up the Muscle Buster for the pin on Dawson at 3:45.
During the replays, Kevin offers to get Brennan a Joe shirt from the merchandise table. Owens goes to leave but Joe calls him to the ring. Kevin won't get in because he's a good man who won't drop Joe after his first match. Joe is a rookie here in NXT and one win isn't enough for an NXT Title match. Cue Regal who agrees with Owens. Joe hasn't earned a title shot, but he's earned the right to a non-title fight against Owens next week.
Results
Zack Ryder/Mojo Rawley b. Elias Samson/Mike Rallis Middle rope Rough Ryder to Samson
Emma b. Blue Pants Emma Lock
Tyler Breeze b. Bull Dempsey Beauty Shot
Becky Lynch b. Jesse McKay Disgoosted Armbar
Baron Corbin b. Angelo Dawkins End of Days
Samoa Joe b. Scott Dawson Muscle Buster
Impact Wrestling
Date: June 10, 2015
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: D'Angelo Dinero, Josh Matthews
We're closing in on Slammiversary and the big story is the announcement of the World Title match between champion Kurt Angle and new #1 contender Ethan Carter III. However, tonight is Destination X, meaning Rockstar Spud is getting the World Title shot against Angle. Other than that, we have the continuation of the best of five series for the Tag Team Titles between the Dirty Heels (who are finally acting like heels) and the Wolves. Let's get to it.
We open with a video on the X-Division as a whole before focusing on Spud cashing in. However, Austin Aries is cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase on the winner. There will also be three triple threats with the winners fighting in another triple threat for the title at a future date.
It's time for the World Title match but Ethan Carter III and Tyrus cut Christy off. Ethan is livid that he isn't getting the shot tonight so he's staging an old fashioned sit-in. He dares anyone to come get him out of here so Kurt Angle comes to the ring. Angle gets all serious and threatens ankle pain to get Carter out of the ring.
TNA World Title: Rockstar Spud vs. Kurt Angle
Kurt is defending and takes Spud down to the mat with ease for a headlock. Back up and Spud is able to send Angle outside, only to eat a belly to belly on the floor for a huge crash. Angle takes it back inside and nails another suplex to set up a chinlock. An Angle Slam attempt is countered and Spud scores with an enziguri.
Spud slugs away and tosses Kurt to the floor, setting up a huge flip dive off the top. A superplex plants Spud back inside but he's still able to escape the Angle Slam. There's a running forearm to Kurt but he grabs an ankle lock, only to have Spud roll away into an Underdog attempt. Kurt charges into the post and eats the Underdog for a VERY close two, which shocks Spud. There's the ankle lock with the grapevine and Spud taps at 8:35.
Here's the Dollhouse to call out Awesome Kong. Taryn is willing to bare all to see who the toughest Knockout is, meaning Kong has to compete for the title in a lingerie pillow fight. They have the lingerie ready for her and it's the only way she gets a shot.
Manik vs. Low Ki vs. Crazzy Steve
Winner advances to the X-Division Title match at a later date. Manik goes after Steve to start but Ki breaks up Manik's suicide dive. Back in and Manik uppercuts both guys until Steve jumps into his arms, only to have Ki hit a springboard spinning kick to the face. Something like a Codebreaker gets two on Ki with Steve making the save. Steve misses a high cross body and gets kicked into Manik in the corner, setting up the Warrior's Way to Manik to give Ki the pin at 3:28.
Grado is warming up for his triple threat later but he needs to lose weight to become X-Division. He teases some Parkour but doesn't quite make it work. This is the guy that was supposed to be the most awesome thing ever? Not bad but really?
Recap of James Storm possibly murdering Mickie James last week. Apparently she wasn't physically hurt.
Tigre Uno vs. DJZ vs. Mandrews
We start with the triple headlock with Tigre speeding things up to take over. DJZ dropkicks him down though, only to have Mandrews slingshot in for a hurricanrana. A standing moonsault gets two on DJZ but Tigre comes in with a missile dropkick. Tigre slams DJZ down for two but Mandrews comes back in with a tornado DDT to put everyone down. DJZ is up first for a running flip dive to the floor to take out both guys again. Back in and Tigre shoves DJZ off the top and hits a Phoenix Splash (read as a spinning knee to the face) to pin Mandrews at 5:27.
Post match Jesse Godderz comes down to destroy DJZ.
Grado continues to try to lose weight. He asks Tigre for some tips but there's a language barrier. Grado leaves and Tigre calls him a jackass.
Knockouts Title: Taryn Terrell vs. Awesome Kong
Taryn is defending and this is a lingerie pillow fight. There's a bed in the ring for the Dollhouse and Taryn laughs at the idea of Kong having to wear the lingerie. Kong comes out in her regular gear, much to Taryn's annoyance. Marti and Jade are pulled to the floor for a beating so Taryn says the fans don't get to see her in lingerie. What a tease I am!
Cue Brooke to say Taryn promised a title defense tonight and she's ready anytime. Brooke shoves her down and the catfight is on as Kong is off making Jade and Marti into toothpicks. Taryn is disrobed and runs off. No match of course.
The Dirty Heels are ready for their tag match later, but Roode wants the first World Title shot.
Grado weighs in but strips off his singlet first. JB tells him there's no weight limit so he's good to go. I've seen worse.
Grado vs. Kenny King vs. Cruz
It's a big brawl to start with Cruz being thrown to the floor and Grado getting kicked in the face. Cruz eats two running boots in the corner but Grado pounds on King's back. We hit a chinlock on Grado for a bit before Cruz fails at lifting him up for a suplex. King kicks Grado in the face, leaving Cruz to cross body Kenny for two. There's a Royal Flush to Cruz but Grado slugs away on Kenny, only to eat a chop to the chest. The Royal Flush doesn't work on Grado, who sends Kenny outside and nails a Cannonball on Cruz for the pin at 5:18. Josh: What a win and what a company!
Bram takes over a camera and says he's going to the ring to make history.
After a break, here's Bram to run down the X-Division and issue an open challenge to anyone who wants to fight in a six sided ring.
Bram vs. Crimson
Uh....sure. Crimson not being around for the better part of a few years is treated like getting a free coffee from a Shell station. Bram slugs him to the floor but Crimson takes over back inside. That sends Bram outside for a stroll, where he sends Crimson into the barricade. Back in and Bram scores with a kind of t-bone suplex, followed by a Rings of Saturn with a neck crank. Bram makes the ropes and hits the Brighter Side of Suffering for the pin at 4:38.
Kurt Angle says he'll win.
Ethan Carter III says when he throws the first punch, Angle isn't getting up.
TNA World Title: Austin Aries vs. Kurt Angle
Aries is cashing in his Feast or Fired briefcase to get the title shot. Feeling out process to start until Aries clotheslines him down for two and nails a right hand in the corner. Aries flips out of a German and nails a low dropkick as we take a break. Back with Angle rolling Germans but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT for two. There's the Last Chancery but Angle escapes and grabs an ankle lock, only to have Aries make the ropes.
The discus elbow is countered into an Angle Slam for two. Angle misses the moonsault and gets caught in another Last Chancery, which really doesn't look as good as they're hoping for. The 450 is broken up by Angle running the ropes but Aries shoves him off for the 450 and a very near fall. Another Angle Slam is countered with two discus forearms but the brainbuster only gets two with Kurt putting a foot on the ropes.
There's an ankle lock on the champion but he counters into one of his own. Aries rolls Kurt to the floor for a suicide dive, which goes right into the barricade. Austin is out cold and it's another Angle Slam, only to have Aries counter into a rollup for two. Now the ankle lock with the grapevine makes Austin tap at 18:00.
Ethan Carter III comes in and lays Angle out to end the show.
Results
Kurt Angle b. Rockstar Spud Ankle lock
Low Ki b. Manik and Crazzy Steve Warrior's Way to Manik
Tigre Uno b. DJZ and Mandrews Phoenix Splash to Mandrews
Grado b. Kenny King and Cruz Cannonball to Cruz
Bram b. Crimson Brighter Side of Suffering
Kurt Angle b. Austin Aries Ankle lock