klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Wrestlemania 28 did 1.3 million buys, the highest amount of all time for the company.
Monday Night Raw
Date: April 16, 2012
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
We're in England and on taped delay tonight which usually slows things down a lot. From what I can tell, Lesnar won't be here tonight which is possibly a good thing. If nothing else maybe he can hit the gym tonight for a change. There's probably going to be a title change of some sort, although not in the Henry vs. Punk match. The main events are usually strong in England though so let's get to it.
Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Mark Henry
No intro for Henry. This is No DQ and No Countout due to Punk retaining by both of those means before. Big reaction for Punk on the big match intros. Henry takes him into the corner to start so Punk fires off kicks to the knee. He walks into a kind of spinebuster though and Mark kicks him to the floor. Punk speeds things up and slides back in before diving back out for a suicide dive.
Henry shrugs off some more kicks but Punk gets up a boot to stop a charging challenger. Punk channels his inner Hardy by running the railing but goes much further before hitting a bulldog. He can't get Henry back in though so he fires off more kicks. Henry grabs the leg and swings Punk into the barricade as we take a break.
Back with Punk caught in a neck crank and being run over by a clothesline/shoulder block. Punk rolls outside and grabs a chair for a few shots which get him a two count. Punk charges at him again with the chair but gets kicked down. Now Henry gets the chair and drills it into Punk's back. He wedges the chair between the top and middle rope but Punk blocks the shot and comes back with kicks in the corner.
Henry runs Punk over again to come back and it's off to a bearhug. Punk elbows out of it and hits a short DDT for two. Punk goes to the corner but springboards into World's Strongest Slam position. He jumps out of it though and the high kick puts Henry into the corner. The knee/bulldog combo is countered (duh) but Punk trips him into the wedged chair which knocks Henry out. Punk grabs the chair and goes up, coming off with it like an elbow, Cactus Jack style, good for the pin at 13:12.
Jericho pops up on screen at a bar and says that he's got a rematch for the title at Extreme Rules in a Chicago street fight. Punk says that's cool because he'll take Jericho apart in the streets of Chicago. Jericho says just show up sober and he shows us a clip of Punk going into a pub from earlier in the day. Jericho thinks Punk is drunk right now. Punk says his friends are drinkers and he can go in with them and have some fish and chips. Jericho says Punk sounds like his father and that the straightedge is just a facade now. Punk gets ready to respond but the screen cuts away.
R-Truth is dressed up like Sherlock Holmes and is talking to Little Jimmy Watson when Teddy Long pops up. Truth is going to find him a job. Teddy seems pleased.
Lord Tensai says nothing of note.
US Title: Santino Marella vs. David Otunga
Santino has about 7 British soccer shirts on, finally getting the right one with the British national team one. Quick slam by Otunga gets two and it's time for clubbing forearms. There's a three hour Raw next week. Oh and it's the Draft. Cool. Santino tries his usual drop down but Otunga kicks him in the head. Spinebuster hits but Otunga has to slide all over the place to get in position so that the foot can go on the rope. Santino comes back with his usual stuff and here's the Cobra, good for the pin at 2:00.
We go to a sitdown interview with Brock. He says he's not a superstar but a legit destroyer. This is accompanied by highlights of his career on all levels, including him beating Rock. We also get some UFC stills which are still bizarre to see on Raw. Lesnar talks about bringing legitimacy to this company because Cena isn't the real deal. If Brock had been around for the last eight years, Cena would be carrying his bags. The match at the PPV is an Extreme Rules match.
Zach Ryder vs. Kane
We go to a break during Kane's entrance and come back to see the Kane attack on the Ortons last week. Ryder gets on the apron and Kane kicks him into the announce table. Kane rams him into the steps and the beating is on. Into the ring and there's a chokeslam. There was never a bell.
Kane talks about the beating of the Ortons and how it was like father like son.
Kofi is talking to AJ in the back when Bryan pops up to a ROAR. He yells at Kofi for hitting on her and shushes AJ for speaking up. Bryan says he'll put Kofi in the LeBell Lock but then realizes he's better than Gene LeBell so it's now the YES Lock, because that's what people will be screaming when the referee asks if they give up. Bryan starts a long YES chant in Kofi's face and keeps doing it until we take a break.
Cena time. Before he talks we see a clip of the Brock beating from last week. Cena finds it interesting that Johnny Ace is always around for these attacks from Brock. Wrestlemania was certainly the end of an era and it might be his own. With Ace becoming the most powerful man in the company, Cena might be in trouble. Ace seems to think that Cena Sucks (said in a great imitation) and that's a problem.
Ace claims to be legitimizing all of this so he goes and gets Brock Lesnar. After a year of hearing about movie parts and next parts and entertainment, Brock Lesnar stands for destruction. On April 29, it's not about winning because that's all Brock has done. The sole purpose of Lesnar at Extreme Rules is to end and replace Cena. Cena doesn't care because no matter what happens, he's going to fight.
Here's Ace who says this is the beginning of the era of People Power. The WWE Universe wants to see Cena fight so tonight Cena will be in an extreme rules match. Next Monday there's a contract signing between Cena and Brock. The opponent is a mystery because that's more fun. It doesn't exactly explain why he told us who Cena's opponent was in about 10 seconds last week but whatever.
We recap the world title match from earlier and the promo that followed.
Horny is in the back reading a book next to a shelf of CDs and albums when Truth walks through it. Horny tries to go through it but it doesn't work. Ok then.
Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan
Bryan is ridiculously over. He takes it to the corner and hits a running dropkick. Bryan keeps control to start and we go to the floor. Bryan misses his running knee so Kofi pops up and hits a HUGE dive off the top as we take a break. Back with Bryan avoiding a charge to send Kofi into the buckle. AJ is watching in the back. More kicks from Daniel set up a chinlock.
Kofi comes back with chops and kicks followed by the jumping clothesline. Boom Drop hits and he loads up Trouble in Paradise. As he claps his hands, the fans chant No. That was cute. Yes Lock is countered into the SOS for two. Kofi sets for the top rope cross body but Bryan comes up for a superplex. Kofi shoves him off but the cross body misses. Yes Lock ends this at 10:31. AJ is smiling a little in the back.
Bryan goes for the Lock again but Sheamus makes the save.
Brodus Clay vs. Dolph Ziggler
Well this is some better competition wouldn't you say? Dolph tries a dropkick but Clay easily suplexes him just after. And here's Swagger for the DQ at 24 seconds.
Vickie shoves one of the dancing girls down but the other chases her into the ring. Brodus jiggles and Vickie gets shoved down.
Ace and Otunga have a meeting in the back when Eve pops up. She says they were supposed to have a meeting last week but Ace seems puzzled. They go into his office and Otunga follows.
Memorial video for Chief Jay Strongbow. Better late than never.
Little Jimmy has found Teddy a job: GM of Smackdown. He's perfect because he has experience.
Great Khali/Big Show vs. Primo/Epico
Just scrap the tag titles too if this is th ebest the champions can get. We hear about Rosa and the champs complaining on Twitter lately. Khali and Epico get us going as Abraham Washington (called AW now apparently) is scouting. This goes badly for the champions so it's off to Primo who gets kicked in the face. The champs try to bail with the titles but Show throws them back in. A pair of chops put them down and double chokeslams end this at 1:54. Oh screw you WWE. Your titles mean nothing and THIS IS WHY.
Package on the show in Moscow.
John Cena vs. ???
It's Lord Tensai and this is Extreme Rules. Cena grabs a quick suplex but Tensai beats him up. Cena's shorts look a little shorter here. A corner splash puts Cena on the floor and Tensai puts him into the steps. A powerbomb on the floor is countered and Cena gets the steps. Tensai's dude drills Cena with kicks and Otunga throws him back in. Butterfly suplex gets two.
Tensai hooks a nerve hold but Cena fights back. Cena hits his usual stuff but when he loads up the Shuffle, Tensai pops up and chops Cena down. Backsplash gets two. Tensai drops a leg on the arm and puts on a Fujiwara Armbar. Sweet goodness there's some crank on that thing. Cena rolls through into a crossface (called the STF by Cole) and Otunga runs in. There's an AA for him but Cena walks into green mist and a Baldo Bomb for the pin at 7:00.
Cena is blind to end the show.
Results
CM Punk b. Mark Henry – Chair shot from the top rope
Santino Marella b. David Otunga – Cobra
Daniel Bryan b. Sheamus – Yes Lock
Brodus Clay b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered
Great Khali/Big Show b. Epico/Primo – Chokeslam to Primo
Lord Tensai b. John Cena – Chokebomb
Tuesday
Traci is gone from TNA again. Did anyone know she was still there?
Raw got a 3.1, the same as last week.
Wednesday
NXT
Date: April 18, 2012
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: William Regal, Josh Matthews
We're in Regal country tonight and after a good show last week, hopefully this time things pick up even more. We've had some stories on the show lately and they've been done well with the long backstage segments. For the first time in a long time I'm actually looking forward to this show. Let's get to it.
The opening video now has a recap which is the exact same format of Glee. I think that's Bateman narrating. It covers the whole Stolen Striker story. This even has the bell and the title in lower case letters.
Percy Watson vs. Johnny Curtis
Regal gives us a quick story about hang gliding naked and being in jail for two days, getting here just in time. The announcers are talking about Glee now as Maxine sits in on commentary. Watson hits a leg lariat for a quick two. Maxine blames Curtis for being the mastermind for the whole Striker caper. There's no relationship between Curtis and Maxine. Curtis makes his comeback but walks into an armdrag.
That gets Watson nowhere so it's right back to Curtis choking away. The majority of this match is about Maxine and the plot which she denies connection to, meaning the camera is on her for most of the time as well. Regal talks about going to the Himalayas and how they can pick up a mountain gazelle for its hair and how it was made into something he's wearing today. That's a bigger lie than anything Maxine has said today.
Curtis hooks a chinlock as this is getting more time than it probably should given the guys that are in there. A jawbreaker gets Watson out of the hold and he speeds things up. A dropkick puts Curtis down as does the jumping clothesline. Heisman gets two and the Persecution gets the pin at 8:19.
Post match Regal calls Curtis to the back. Curtis has to sit in on commentary with Regal during Maxine's match, which is next.
Maxine vs. Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn has new music. She grabs two quick rollups for two and a backbreaker for the same. Maxine comes back with a neck crank and some chest slaps. Curtis talks about playing as Regal in WCW/NWO Revenge which is a cool thing to hear. Kaitlyn breaks out of it and hits a cross body for two. Maxine sends her into the buckle and a dragon sleeper with a body scissors gets the submission at 3:33.
Post match Regal says he doesn't believe either of them about Striker, so Maxine is required to be his manager or they're fired. He has a contract to make it official. They go to sign it and Regal handcuffs them together. That's from the arrest story he told to start the show.
Titus and Young are in the back and.....THEY'RE GOING TO SMACKDOWN???? AS IN PEOPLE ARE LEAVING THE SHOW???? SOMETHING IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING ON THIS SHOW??? They do a stupid dance.
Striker is looking in a mirror and has Hawkins' cane. There's a showdown tonight.
Raw ReBound is about Punk vs. Jericho.
Reks and Hawkins are yelling at each other in the back and say they're done. Maxine and Curtis come in and yell at each other as well because they're stuck together. Watson comes up and laughs at them. Bateman comes up and finds it hilarious. Kaitlyn thinks Maxine should be used to handcuffs. Comedy ensues.
Here are Hawkins and Reks who say that Regal doctored the footage which said it was them that kidnapped Striker. Striker pops up and says that he's not 6'3 and 300lbs but he's been accepted. He calls the two guys chavs which will make sense if you're from England but the name fits. Striker talks about being chloroformed and beaten. The people don't believe the lies and everyone knows it was them. Hawkins says so what so Striker swings the cane at both of them. Regal stops them and says right now it's Reks vs. Hawkins, loser gets fired.
Curt Hawkins vs. Tyler Reks
Oh and Striker is guest referee. He just happened to be wearing a referee shirt under his jacket. Reks says they're friends but in the middle of it Hawkins decks him. We take a break with Hawkins on the floor. The bell rings when we come back and Hawkins is sent to the floor again. Reks pounds on him as Regal talks about throwing a ferret in a bucket with a rat. Reks misses a top rope shoulder and Hawkins takes control.
Off to a chinlock as the fans make Reks the face by default. A kind of suplex gets two and Hawkins guillotines him on the top rope. He spends too much time yelling at the people though and Reks hits a pescado to take him out. Downward Spiral gets two in the ring for Tyler. Hawkins tries what looked to be a suplex of some sort but Reks gets behind him and a rollup pins Hawkins at 5:30.
Striker punches Hawkins post match.
Regal fires Reks post match as well because he wants to.
Results
Percy Watson b. Johnny Curtis – Persecution
Maxine b. Kaitlyn – Dragon Sleeper
Tyler Reks b. Curt Hawkins – Rollup
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: April 19, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike uTenay, Taz
It's the first show after Lockdown and according to the previews, Hogan has a huge announcement for the night. That could mean anything around here so I have no idea what to expect. Other than that Eric is supposedly gone (why do I not buy that) and Roode retained the title in a pretty questionable decision. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of the end of Lockdown and Storm saying that this is a tough one to swallow.
Here's Roode to open the show and he has short hair now. He says all of his catchphrases and says he's still world champion. The kick nailed him but he's still champion. He says that he's beaten every one of the people's heroes and there aren't any left. Cue Anderson who says he doesn't need a gun, a knife or a beer bottle to take the title. Roode says Anderson isn't at the front of the line so hit the road Jack.
That brings out Hardy who limps to the ring just like Roode did. Hardy says it's time to get selfish and end Roode. Anderson says he was here first which Roode agrees with. Hardy says it's his turn but Anderson tells him to get in line. They're about to brawl but Hogan pops up on screen and has something to say. He wants all of the champions in the ring tonight. As for Hardy and Anderson, they'll have a match later for the #1 contender spot in the main event.
Crimson/Bully Ray vs. Matt Morgan/Austin Aries
Nothing wrong with combining feuds. Crimson and Morgan get it on to start but Ray interferes to make Morgan miss a boot. Crimson works on the leg with Ray ramming it into the apron. Ray works on the knee for awhile before Crimson comes back in to work on the leg, including a basic leg lock. Morgan avoids a charging Crimson and makes the tag to Aries.
The champ fires off with a bunch of speed and tries some poetry in motion with Crimson playing Matt. Crimson accidentally spears Ray and heads to the floor. Suicide dive takes out Crimson so Aries loads up the brainbuster. Ray rolls out of it and a handful of tights pins Aries at 6:03.
Hardy says he and Anderson both deserve chances so he's fine with Hogan's decision.
Here's Garrett to bring the show down. He has his Lockdown team with him minus Aries. AJ is in black gloves for some reason. Garrett says they won after a hard fight and got rid of his dad. Here's Flair to say that they got rid of Eric BEEP. Yeah they're censoring his name now. Flair runs down the guys in the ring and says next week there's going to be an Eric party. He'll drinking there too and those four aren't invited.
We go to the back with Daniels and Kaz. Daniels has an envelope which apparently holds whatever he has over AJ. It's over AJ and not Kaz. Ok then.
Joe, Magnus and D-Von have a quick powwow but don't know what the announcement is about later.
Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles
AJ has black tights and gloves. The look really isn't working for him. Angle tries a German suplex grip but AJ escapes....and the screen goes black and we go to a commercial. Seemed like a glitch. Back from what I guess was an early cut to a commercial. Daniels and Kaz are at ringside. Styles hits the springboard forearm but Daniels pops up on the apron with the envelope. AJ escapes the slam and Daniels shows Styles the papers. The distraction lets Angle roll him up for the win at 5:26 total, but about 4:30 was in commercial so no rating.
AJ is freaked out by the envelope and he doesn't seem that concerned with the loss. Daniels says he has copies.
Joseph Park is still looking for Immortal but Gunner still doesn't want to talk to him. Joseph stops him from leaving and says that he's not going anywhere because he wants answers. Gunner says go talk to Bully Ray. Park seems cool with that idea.
Here come all the champions and the feed cuts out again as D-Von comes to the ring. This wasn't as bad as it only cut about 5 seconds because it was said they were going to commercial.
Back and all the champions are in the ring. In the back RVD is coming to the ring and Hogan stops him for some congratulating. Hogan throws him in the #1 contenders match, I think because he was on the team that got rid of Eric. Well at least it's not Garrett getting the chance.
Hogan comes to the arena now for his big announcement. Starting next week, once a month it's Open Fight Night. On that month, someone from outside of TNA is going to be able to come on Impact to wrestle. They get to have a match and they'll be judged by three people. If the judges and Hulk like what they see, the person gets a contract. So they're combining this with his Celebrity Wrestling show? Oh and also, ANYONE can issue a challenge to ANYONE and it's automatically a fight.
Roode obviously protests and says that's not fair. He asks Hogan who he thinks he is and there goes his intelligence. If a champion gets called out, Hogan gets to decide if it's a title match. You can tweet and Facebook Hulk ideas as well to determine if a champion defends. D-Von says he wants to be a fighting champion so the TV Title will be on the line every week. So to recap, every month someone from outside the company gets to come in and try their luck for a contract. There's the challenge night, and there's going to be a title match that night every month. Oh and the TV Title is defended weekly now.
Gail Kim/Rosita/Sarita/Madison Rayne vs. Tara/Brooke Tessmacher/Mickie James/Velvet Sky
Velvet vs. Sarita to start and Sky hits the Kelly Kelly headscissors. Off to Rosita who gets beaten down as well. Gail comes in and hits a clothesline for two. Velvet smacks her around so it's off to Madison vs. Brooke and then Mickie very quickly. Flapjack takes Madison down and Mickie goes up, but Sarita pulls her onto the ropes for two. With Mickie on her knees, Rosita manages to hit a rana for two.
Mickie hits a neckbreaker for some breathing room and it's off to Tara. Down goes Sarita and we get the jiggling moonsault. Tessmacher comes in and gets Salsa danced at. TNT takes Sarita down and dances as well. Facejam out of the corner draws in Madison and it's off to Gail quickly. Everything breaks down and Velvet distracts Gail enough for Brooke to get the rollup pin at 5:40.
Velvet yells at Gail post match like she was the one that got the pin.
ODB and Eric are on their honeymoon. They're by a pool and Eric has a bag of ice on his pelvis because of some friction issues. A guy pops up and Eric freaks on him and strips down.
TV Title: Gunner vs. D-Von
Gunner jumps him and we're off and not quite running. D-Von comes back with his right hands but runs into an elbow. Clothesline gets two for Gunner. He beats on Gunner for a bit until D-Von comes back with a shoulder block. Thesz Press sets up a headbutt and more jumping moves. Spinebuster finishes clean at 4:07.
Here's Storm for the big talk post Lockdown. After a break he apologizes to his family and thought that Roode being looked at by medics was enough. Then he had to drive home and look at his daughter when she asked where the belt was. He couldn't look himself in the eyes either because he didn't want to see a failure. Storm says he beat himself and talks about all the work he's put in to get here. His biggest apology is to his dad though, because that's who he let down the most. Roode said that Storm's luck has run out and maybe that's true. He drops the mic and walks away. Really good promo.
Rob Van Dam vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy
Winner gets Roode at Sacrifice. Everyone attacks everyone to start with no one getting a distinct advantage. Jeff's sitout gordbuster gets two on RVD. Hardy gets sent into the post and Anderson hooks a chinlock on Van Dam. Whisper in the Wind takes Anderson down and it's into one of the triple threat formulas, this one being everyone takes everyone down and no one gets a long term advantage. Twist to Anderson and Jeff hits the Swanton but Van Dam kicks his head off before a cover. Five Star hits Anderson and a backslide to Hardy gives Rob the win at 5:24.
Results
Bully Ray/Crimson b. Matt Morgan/Austin Aries – Ray pinned Aries with a rollup
Kurt Angle b. AJ Styles – Rolup
Brooke Tessmacher/Tara/Mickie James/Velvet Sky b. Gail Kim/Rosita/Sarita/Madison Rayne – Tessmacher pinned Kim with a rollup
D-Von b. Gunner – Spinebuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff Hardy and Mr. Anderson – Backslide to Hardy
Friday
Smackdown
Date: April 20, 2012
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews
We're still in England this week for the last TV show of the tour. I don't remember anything being announced for tonight's show so I'm really not sure what to expect from it. We'll probably get more build to Bryan vs. Sheamus as well as hopefully a few more matches added to the thin card. Let's get to it.
Do you know your enemy? Mine is an annoying piece of malware at the moment.
There's a six man tag main event: Cody/Bryan/Henry vs. Orton/Sheamus/Khali.
Here's Bryan to open the show. He talks about how Sheamus didn't do anything better than him at Wrestlemania. Instead of facing him like a man, Sheamus took the coward's way out and jumped Bryan from behind like he's done to everyone. At Extreme Rules he won't get jumped or be distracted. So now it's back to Chicago where he shocked the world by winning the MITB case. He'll beat Sheamus twice in the two out of three falls match and get back his rightful title. Did Sheamus cheat at Wrestlemania? YES! Will Bryan win the title back at Extreme Rules? YES!
Cue AJ to a lot of booing. How can you boo someone that looks like that? Bryan tells her to turn around and go away but she says this is the only way she can talk to him. AJ asks if she can just talk to him about their problems but Bryan says he has no problems. He had one, but he got rid of her. Bryan regrets ever going out with her in the first place and he wishes that she was never even born. That finally gets the people to boo Bryan. He asks if there's any chance he'd ever take AJ back and answers with an emphatic NO before leaving.
AJ vs. Natalya
AJ starts off all stoic but suddenly explodes on Natalya, beating her into the corner. The referee pulls her off twice but AJ won't let up, drawing a DQ at 48 seconds.
Damien Sandow talks about something Benjamin Franklin said and runs down Dancing With The Stars and Hoarders. At least with Dancing it's about something that involves work and talent. Most of the other shows he criticizes I completely agree with him on.
Brodus Clay vs. Hunico
Brodus has something to say. He says cut the music and gets booed, prompting him to say it's coming, so don't worry. His little brother is supposed to be here so he sends the Funkadactyls (the girls) to go find him. And it's Horny. Cole's reaction is exactly what mind is. At least the Mama and the Bridge Club was something original. Brodus does his shaking and Horny gets in to do it as well. Hunico becomes my new hero by shoving him down. The squash commences and the splash ends it in 1:10, about 25 seconds of which was spent on the Hornswoggle part.
Horny hits the Tadpole Splash post match. I hope this isn't permanent.
Teddy is looking for Aksana but finds Titus and Young who are new to Smackdown. They laugh at him for not signing them and now being a gopher. Ace pops up and they all make fun of Teddy. Titus/Young leave so Ace puts one of those big black furry Queen's guard hats on Teddy who isn't allowed to talk or move for the rest of the night.
Orton is in the back with Striker and we get a video on the attack on Cowboy Bob last week. Orton, with his growing mutton chops, says that his dad will be fine. On the other hand, Kane isn't going to be fine. They have a match at Extreme Rules and it's falls count anywhere.
Usos vs. Titus O'Neal/Darren Young
NXT comes to Fridays. I forgot how annoying Titus' song was. Young starts with Jimmy who hits a spinning forearm for two. Off to Jey who hits some double chops before bringing Jimmy back in. Titus comes in and the fans do not care at all. He uses his power stuff and gets a small reaction off a European Uppercut. Back to Young who hits a neckbreaker for two. The fans are waking up a bit. A tag brings in Jimmy who gets the only solid reaction for the US shout to the crowd. Jey gets sent to the floor and a blind tag allows Young and Titus to hit a Hart Attack out of the corner for the pin.
The Raw ReBound is about Jericho vs. Punk.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show
Non-title. Del Rio drives an Aston Martin here which is very appropriate. Del Rio has officially been traded to the Smackdown roster with no compensation announced yet. Big Show blocks Del Rio's offense out of the corner and shoves him down. Show stands on his chest in the corner and chops it for good measure. An elbow follows for two. Show loads up the big punch but Del Rio kicks him in the knee to take him down.
More kicks to the arm by Del Rio follow and he hooks an armbar. Show shrugs it off but the chokeslam is broken up by a kick to the knee. The Codebreaker to the arm sets up the armbreaker but Show lifts him up with the bad arm into kind of an Angle Slam minus the spin. Show spears him down and calls for the chokeslam. Ricardo gets up on the apron and Cody comes in with the Disaster Kick, giving Del Rio the pin.
Cody runs away post match.
Drew McIntyre and Heath Slater are watching the following squash.
Danny Lerman vs. Ryback
Same deal as always but this time it's a British guy. Lerman hits him and is promptly mangled. Clothesline and MuscleBuster variation win in 1:11.
We get the Brock interview from Raw.
Teddy is still standing in the same place although he's now in a full uniform. Regal pops up for some jokes and leaves. Aksana's music hits and HOKEY SMOKE THAT'S CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI! He's playing the Antonio Cesaro character here, a European rugby player. Ace pops out of his office and invites them in. I'm not British so maybe I don't get it, but what's the point of guards that aren't allowed to move? Couldn't that create some security risks?
Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Great Khali/Randy Orton
Main event time. Cody jumps Khali and hits him in the knee as Khali is getting in. Trainers come out and say Khali can't go. Big Show comes out to replace him.
Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Big Show/Randy Orton
The match is joined in progress after a break with Randy pounding on Bryan in the corner. Tag to Sheamus so Bryan bails to the corner to tag in Cody. The champ knocks Cody around and hits the rolling fireman's carry slam for two. Cody's neckbreaker is countered and Sheamus throws him into position for the ten forearms. Cody reverses a suplex and sends Sheamus to the floor. A baseball slide by Cody sets up the knee off the apron from Bryan, which I think is the same thing that's happened to him for three or four weeks in a row.
Bryan comes in to stomp on Sheamus now with a YES for each connecting boot. Henry comes in for some choking and it's back to Rhodes. He works on the arm of the champ and then into a chinlock. Sheamus fights out of that as well and knocks Cody out of the air on the Disaster Kick attempt. Hot tag to Orton and it's powerslams for all normal sized heels. Cody gets in a shot though and it's time for a break.
Back with Henry holding Orton in a neck crank and it's back to Bryan. A running dropkick in the corner gets two. A top rope splash misses and Orton makes the tag to Big Show who faces Henry. Cody manages a knee to the back and Mark clotheslines Show down. The heels beat on him and Cody hooks a figure four that his daddy would be ashamed of. While the hold is still on, Cody makes a tag to Henry who splashes Show for two.
Bryan drops an elbow for two. Hot tag to Sheamus to meet Bryan and the beating is on. Irish Curse gets two with Cody making the save. Rhodes rolls to the floor and lands right in front of Show who knocks him out cold with the WMD. YES Lock is blocked by Sheamus but the Brogue Kick misses as well. Tag to Henry and Sheamus kicks his head off. Show adds the right hand and the RKO gets the pin at 13:20 shown of at least 16:50.
Show was limping post match.
Results
Natalya b. AJ via DQ when AJ wouldn't stop attacking Natalya in the corner
Brodus Clay b. Hunico – Big Splash
Titus O'Neal/Darren Young b. Usos – Hart Attack out of the corner
Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Pin after a Disaster Kick from Cody Rhodes
Ryback b. Danny Lerman – MuscleBuster
Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Mark Henry/Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes – RKO to Henry
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
CM Punk b. Mark Henry – Chair shot from the top rope
Santino Marella b. David Otunga – Cobra
Daniel Bryan b. Sheamus – Yes Lock
Brodus Clay b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered
Great Khali/Big Show b. Epico/Primo – Chokeslam to Primo
Lord Tensai b. John Cena – Chokebomb
NXT
Percy Watson b. Johnny Curtis – Persecution
Maxine b. Kaitlyn – Dragon Sleeper
Tyler Reks b. Curt Hawkins – Rollup
Impact Wrestling
Bully Ray/Crimson b. Matt Morgan/Austin Aries – Ray pinned Aries with a rollup
Kurt Angle b. AJ Styles – Rolup
Brooke Tessmacher/Tara/Mickie James/Velvet Sky b. Gail Kim/Rosita/Sarita/Madison Rayne – Tessmacher pinned Kim with a rollup
D-Von b. Gunner – Spinebuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff Hardy and Mr. Anderson – Backslide to Hardy
Smackdown
Natalya b. AJ via DQ when AJ wouldn't stop attacking Natalya in the corner
Brodus Clay b. Hunico – Big Splash
Titus O'Neal/Darren Young b. Usos – Hart Attack out of the corner
Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Pin after a Disaster Kick from Cody Rhodes
Ryback b. Danny Lerman – MuscleBuster
Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Mark Henry/Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes – RKO to Henry
Wrestlemania 28 did 1.3 million buys, the highest amount of all time for the company.
Monday Night Raw
Date: April 16, 2012
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
We're in England and on taped delay tonight which usually slows things down a lot. From what I can tell, Lesnar won't be here tonight which is possibly a good thing. If nothing else maybe he can hit the gym tonight for a change. There's probably going to be a title change of some sort, although not in the Henry vs. Punk match. The main events are usually strong in England though so let's get to it.
Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Mark Henry
No intro for Henry. This is No DQ and No Countout due to Punk retaining by both of those means before. Big reaction for Punk on the big match intros. Henry takes him into the corner to start so Punk fires off kicks to the knee. He walks into a kind of spinebuster though and Mark kicks him to the floor. Punk speeds things up and slides back in before diving back out for a suicide dive.
Henry shrugs off some more kicks but Punk gets up a boot to stop a charging challenger. Punk channels his inner Hardy by running the railing but goes much further before hitting a bulldog. He can't get Henry back in though so he fires off more kicks. Henry grabs the leg and swings Punk into the barricade as we take a break.
Back with Punk caught in a neck crank and being run over by a clothesline/shoulder block. Punk rolls outside and grabs a chair for a few shots which get him a two count. Punk charges at him again with the chair but gets kicked down. Now Henry gets the chair and drills it into Punk's back. He wedges the chair between the top and middle rope but Punk blocks the shot and comes back with kicks in the corner.
Henry runs Punk over again to come back and it's off to a bearhug. Punk elbows out of it and hits a short DDT for two. Punk goes to the corner but springboards into World's Strongest Slam position. He jumps out of it though and the high kick puts Henry into the corner. The knee/bulldog combo is countered (duh) but Punk trips him into the wedged chair which knocks Henry out. Punk grabs the chair and goes up, coming off with it like an elbow, Cactus Jack style, good for the pin at 13:12.
Jericho pops up on screen at a bar and says that he's got a rematch for the title at Extreme Rules in a Chicago street fight. Punk says that's cool because he'll take Jericho apart in the streets of Chicago. Jericho says just show up sober and he shows us a clip of Punk going into a pub from earlier in the day. Jericho thinks Punk is drunk right now. Punk says his friends are drinkers and he can go in with them and have some fish and chips. Jericho says Punk sounds like his father and that the straightedge is just a facade now. Punk gets ready to respond but the screen cuts away.
R-Truth is dressed up like Sherlock Holmes and is talking to Little Jimmy Watson when Teddy Long pops up. Truth is going to find him a job. Teddy seems pleased.
Lord Tensai says nothing of note.
US Title: Santino Marella vs. David Otunga
Santino has about 7 British soccer shirts on, finally getting the right one with the British national team one. Quick slam by Otunga gets two and it's time for clubbing forearms. There's a three hour Raw next week. Oh and it's the Draft. Cool. Santino tries his usual drop down but Otunga kicks him in the head. Spinebuster hits but Otunga has to slide all over the place to get in position so that the foot can go on the rope. Santino comes back with his usual stuff and here's the Cobra, good for the pin at 2:00.
We go to a sitdown interview with Brock. He says he's not a superstar but a legit destroyer. This is accompanied by highlights of his career on all levels, including him beating Rock. We also get some UFC stills which are still bizarre to see on Raw. Lesnar talks about bringing legitimacy to this company because Cena isn't the real deal. If Brock had been around for the last eight years, Cena would be carrying his bags. The match at the PPV is an Extreme Rules match.
Zach Ryder vs. Kane
We go to a break during Kane's entrance and come back to see the Kane attack on the Ortons last week. Ryder gets on the apron and Kane kicks him into the announce table. Kane rams him into the steps and the beating is on. Into the ring and there's a chokeslam. There was never a bell.
Kane talks about the beating of the Ortons and how it was like father like son.
Kofi is talking to AJ in the back when Bryan pops up to a ROAR. He yells at Kofi for hitting on her and shushes AJ for speaking up. Bryan says he'll put Kofi in the LeBell Lock but then realizes he's better than Gene LeBell so it's now the YES Lock, because that's what people will be screaming when the referee asks if they give up. Bryan starts a long YES chant in Kofi's face and keeps doing it until we take a break.
Cena time. Before he talks we see a clip of the Brock beating from last week. Cena finds it interesting that Johnny Ace is always around for these attacks from Brock. Wrestlemania was certainly the end of an era and it might be his own. With Ace becoming the most powerful man in the company, Cena might be in trouble. Ace seems to think that Cena Sucks (said in a great imitation) and that's a problem.
Ace claims to be legitimizing all of this so he goes and gets Brock Lesnar. After a year of hearing about movie parts and next parts and entertainment, Brock Lesnar stands for destruction. On April 29, it's not about winning because that's all Brock has done. The sole purpose of Lesnar at Extreme Rules is to end and replace Cena. Cena doesn't care because no matter what happens, he's going to fight.
Here's Ace who says this is the beginning of the era of People Power. The WWE Universe wants to see Cena fight so tonight Cena will be in an extreme rules match. Next Monday there's a contract signing between Cena and Brock. The opponent is a mystery because that's more fun. It doesn't exactly explain why he told us who Cena's opponent was in about 10 seconds last week but whatever.
We recap the world title match from earlier and the promo that followed.
Horny is in the back reading a book next to a shelf of CDs and albums when Truth walks through it. Horny tries to go through it but it doesn't work. Ok then.
Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan
Bryan is ridiculously over. He takes it to the corner and hits a running dropkick. Bryan keeps control to start and we go to the floor. Bryan misses his running knee so Kofi pops up and hits a HUGE dive off the top as we take a break. Back with Bryan avoiding a charge to send Kofi into the buckle. AJ is watching in the back. More kicks from Daniel set up a chinlock.
Kofi comes back with chops and kicks followed by the jumping clothesline. Boom Drop hits and he loads up Trouble in Paradise. As he claps his hands, the fans chant No. That was cute. Yes Lock is countered into the SOS for two. Kofi sets for the top rope cross body but Bryan comes up for a superplex. Kofi shoves him off but the cross body misses. Yes Lock ends this at 10:31. AJ is smiling a little in the back.
Bryan goes for the Lock again but Sheamus makes the save.
Brodus Clay vs. Dolph Ziggler
Well this is some better competition wouldn't you say? Dolph tries a dropkick but Clay easily suplexes him just after. And here's Swagger for the DQ at 24 seconds.
Vickie shoves one of the dancing girls down but the other chases her into the ring. Brodus jiggles and Vickie gets shoved down.
Ace and Otunga have a meeting in the back when Eve pops up. She says they were supposed to have a meeting last week but Ace seems puzzled. They go into his office and Otunga follows.
Memorial video for Chief Jay Strongbow. Better late than never.
Little Jimmy has found Teddy a job: GM of Smackdown. He's perfect because he has experience.
Great Khali/Big Show vs. Primo/Epico
Just scrap the tag titles too if this is th ebest the champions can get. We hear about Rosa and the champs complaining on Twitter lately. Khali and Epico get us going as Abraham Washington (called AW now apparently) is scouting. This goes badly for the champions so it's off to Primo who gets kicked in the face. The champs try to bail with the titles but Show throws them back in. A pair of chops put them down and double chokeslams end this at 1:54. Oh screw you WWE. Your titles mean nothing and THIS IS WHY.
Package on the show in Moscow.
John Cena vs. ???
It's Lord Tensai and this is Extreme Rules. Cena grabs a quick suplex but Tensai beats him up. Cena's shorts look a little shorter here. A corner splash puts Cena on the floor and Tensai puts him into the steps. A powerbomb on the floor is countered and Cena gets the steps. Tensai's dude drills Cena with kicks and Otunga throws him back in. Butterfly suplex gets two.
Tensai hooks a nerve hold but Cena fights back. Cena hits his usual stuff but when he loads up the Shuffle, Tensai pops up and chops Cena down. Backsplash gets two. Tensai drops a leg on the arm and puts on a Fujiwara Armbar. Sweet goodness there's some crank on that thing. Cena rolls through into a crossface (called the STF by Cole) and Otunga runs in. There's an AA for him but Cena walks into green mist and a Baldo Bomb for the pin at 7:00.
Cena is blind to end the show.
Results
CM Punk b. Mark Henry – Chair shot from the top rope
Santino Marella b. David Otunga – Cobra
Daniel Bryan b. Sheamus – Yes Lock
Brodus Clay b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered
Great Khali/Big Show b. Epico/Primo – Chokeslam to Primo
Lord Tensai b. John Cena – Chokebomb
Tuesday
Traci is gone from TNA again. Did anyone know she was still there?
Raw got a 3.1, the same as last week.
Wednesday
NXT
Date: April 18, 2012
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: William Regal, Josh Matthews
We're in Regal country tonight and after a good show last week, hopefully this time things pick up even more. We've had some stories on the show lately and they've been done well with the long backstage segments. For the first time in a long time I'm actually looking forward to this show. Let's get to it.
The opening video now has a recap which is the exact same format of Glee. I think that's Bateman narrating. It covers the whole Stolen Striker story. This even has the bell and the title in lower case letters.
Percy Watson vs. Johnny Curtis
Regal gives us a quick story about hang gliding naked and being in jail for two days, getting here just in time. The announcers are talking about Glee now as Maxine sits in on commentary. Watson hits a leg lariat for a quick two. Maxine blames Curtis for being the mastermind for the whole Striker caper. There's no relationship between Curtis and Maxine. Curtis makes his comeback but walks into an armdrag.
That gets Watson nowhere so it's right back to Curtis choking away. The majority of this match is about Maxine and the plot which she denies connection to, meaning the camera is on her for most of the time as well. Regal talks about going to the Himalayas and how they can pick up a mountain gazelle for its hair and how it was made into something he's wearing today. That's a bigger lie than anything Maxine has said today.
Curtis hooks a chinlock as this is getting more time than it probably should given the guys that are in there. A jawbreaker gets Watson out of the hold and he speeds things up. A dropkick puts Curtis down as does the jumping clothesline. Heisman gets two and the Persecution gets the pin at 8:19.
Post match Regal calls Curtis to the back. Curtis has to sit in on commentary with Regal during Maxine's match, which is next.
Maxine vs. Kaitlyn
Kaitlyn has new music. She grabs two quick rollups for two and a backbreaker for the same. Maxine comes back with a neck crank and some chest slaps. Curtis talks about playing as Regal in WCW/NWO Revenge which is a cool thing to hear. Kaitlyn breaks out of it and hits a cross body for two. Maxine sends her into the buckle and a dragon sleeper with a body scissors gets the submission at 3:33.
Post match Regal says he doesn't believe either of them about Striker, so Maxine is required to be his manager or they're fired. He has a contract to make it official. They go to sign it and Regal handcuffs them together. That's from the arrest story he told to start the show.
Titus and Young are in the back and.....THEY'RE GOING TO SMACKDOWN???? AS IN PEOPLE ARE LEAVING THE SHOW???? SOMETHING IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING ON THIS SHOW??? They do a stupid dance.
Striker is looking in a mirror and has Hawkins' cane. There's a showdown tonight.
Raw ReBound is about Punk vs. Jericho.
Reks and Hawkins are yelling at each other in the back and say they're done. Maxine and Curtis come in and yell at each other as well because they're stuck together. Watson comes up and laughs at them. Bateman comes up and finds it hilarious. Kaitlyn thinks Maxine should be used to handcuffs. Comedy ensues.
Here are Hawkins and Reks who say that Regal doctored the footage which said it was them that kidnapped Striker. Striker pops up and says that he's not 6'3 and 300lbs but he's been accepted. He calls the two guys chavs which will make sense if you're from England but the name fits. Striker talks about being chloroformed and beaten. The people don't believe the lies and everyone knows it was them. Hawkins says so what so Striker swings the cane at both of them. Regal stops them and says right now it's Reks vs. Hawkins, loser gets fired.
Curt Hawkins vs. Tyler Reks
Oh and Striker is guest referee. He just happened to be wearing a referee shirt under his jacket. Reks says they're friends but in the middle of it Hawkins decks him. We take a break with Hawkins on the floor. The bell rings when we come back and Hawkins is sent to the floor again. Reks pounds on him as Regal talks about throwing a ferret in a bucket with a rat. Reks misses a top rope shoulder and Hawkins takes control.
Off to a chinlock as the fans make Reks the face by default. A kind of suplex gets two and Hawkins guillotines him on the top rope. He spends too much time yelling at the people though and Reks hits a pescado to take him out. Downward Spiral gets two in the ring for Tyler. Hawkins tries what looked to be a suplex of some sort but Reks gets behind him and a rollup pins Hawkins at 5:30.
Striker punches Hawkins post match.
Regal fires Reks post match as well because he wants to.
Results
Percy Watson b. Johnny Curtis – Persecution
Maxine b. Kaitlyn – Dragon Sleeper
Tyler Reks b. Curt Hawkins – Rollup
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: April 19, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike uTenay, Taz
It's the first show after Lockdown and according to the previews, Hogan has a huge announcement for the night. That could mean anything around here so I have no idea what to expect. Other than that Eric is supposedly gone (why do I not buy that) and Roode retained the title in a pretty questionable decision. Let's get to it.
We open with a recap of the end of Lockdown and Storm saying that this is a tough one to swallow.
Here's Roode to open the show and he has short hair now. He says all of his catchphrases and says he's still world champion. The kick nailed him but he's still champion. He says that he's beaten every one of the people's heroes and there aren't any left. Cue Anderson who says he doesn't need a gun, a knife or a beer bottle to take the title. Roode says Anderson isn't at the front of the line so hit the road Jack.
That brings out Hardy who limps to the ring just like Roode did. Hardy says it's time to get selfish and end Roode. Anderson says he was here first which Roode agrees with. Hardy says it's his turn but Anderson tells him to get in line. They're about to brawl but Hogan pops up on screen and has something to say. He wants all of the champions in the ring tonight. As for Hardy and Anderson, they'll have a match later for the #1 contender spot in the main event.
Crimson/Bully Ray vs. Matt Morgan/Austin Aries
Nothing wrong with combining feuds. Crimson and Morgan get it on to start but Ray interferes to make Morgan miss a boot. Crimson works on the leg with Ray ramming it into the apron. Ray works on the knee for awhile before Crimson comes back in to work on the leg, including a basic leg lock. Morgan avoids a charging Crimson and makes the tag to Aries.
The champ fires off with a bunch of speed and tries some poetry in motion with Crimson playing Matt. Crimson accidentally spears Ray and heads to the floor. Suicide dive takes out Crimson so Aries loads up the brainbuster. Ray rolls out of it and a handful of tights pins Aries at 6:03.
Hardy says he and Anderson both deserve chances so he's fine with Hogan's decision.
Here's Garrett to bring the show down. He has his Lockdown team with him minus Aries. AJ is in black gloves for some reason. Garrett says they won after a hard fight and got rid of his dad. Here's Flair to say that they got rid of Eric BEEP. Yeah they're censoring his name now. Flair runs down the guys in the ring and says next week there's going to be an Eric party. He'll drinking there too and those four aren't invited.
We go to the back with Daniels and Kaz. Daniels has an envelope which apparently holds whatever he has over AJ. It's over AJ and not Kaz. Ok then.
Joe, Magnus and D-Von have a quick powwow but don't know what the announcement is about later.
Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles
AJ has black tights and gloves. The look really isn't working for him. Angle tries a German suplex grip but AJ escapes....and the screen goes black and we go to a commercial. Seemed like a glitch. Back from what I guess was an early cut to a commercial. Daniels and Kaz are at ringside. Styles hits the springboard forearm but Daniels pops up on the apron with the envelope. AJ escapes the slam and Daniels shows Styles the papers. The distraction lets Angle roll him up for the win at 5:26 total, but about 4:30 was in commercial so no rating.
AJ is freaked out by the envelope and he doesn't seem that concerned with the loss. Daniels says he has copies.
Joseph Park is still looking for Immortal but Gunner still doesn't want to talk to him. Joseph stops him from leaving and says that he's not going anywhere because he wants answers. Gunner says go talk to Bully Ray. Park seems cool with that idea.
Here come all the champions and the feed cuts out again as D-Von comes to the ring. This wasn't as bad as it only cut about 5 seconds because it was said they were going to commercial.
Back and all the champions are in the ring. In the back RVD is coming to the ring and Hogan stops him for some congratulating. Hogan throws him in the #1 contenders match, I think because he was on the team that got rid of Eric. Well at least it's not Garrett getting the chance.
Hogan comes to the arena now for his big announcement. Starting next week, once a month it's Open Fight Night. On that month, someone from outside of TNA is going to be able to come on Impact to wrestle. They get to have a match and they'll be judged by three people. If the judges and Hulk like what they see, the person gets a contract. So they're combining this with his Celebrity Wrestling show? Oh and also, ANYONE can issue a challenge to ANYONE and it's automatically a fight.
Roode obviously protests and says that's not fair. He asks Hogan who he thinks he is and there goes his intelligence. If a champion gets called out, Hogan gets to decide if it's a title match. You can tweet and Facebook Hulk ideas as well to determine if a champion defends. D-Von says he wants to be a fighting champion so the TV Title will be on the line every week. So to recap, every month someone from outside the company gets to come in and try their luck for a contract. There's the challenge night, and there's going to be a title match that night every month. Oh and the TV Title is defended weekly now.
Gail Kim/Rosita/Sarita/Madison Rayne vs. Tara/Brooke Tessmacher/Mickie James/Velvet Sky
Velvet vs. Sarita to start and Sky hits the Kelly Kelly headscissors. Off to Rosita who gets beaten down as well. Gail comes in and hits a clothesline for two. Velvet smacks her around so it's off to Madison vs. Brooke and then Mickie very quickly. Flapjack takes Madison down and Mickie goes up, but Sarita pulls her onto the ropes for two. With Mickie on her knees, Rosita manages to hit a rana for two.
Mickie hits a neckbreaker for some breathing room and it's off to Tara. Down goes Sarita and we get the jiggling moonsault. Tessmacher comes in and gets Salsa danced at. TNT takes Sarita down and dances as well. Facejam out of the corner draws in Madison and it's off to Gail quickly. Everything breaks down and Velvet distracts Gail enough for Brooke to get the rollup pin at 5:40.
Velvet yells at Gail post match like she was the one that got the pin.
ODB and Eric are on their honeymoon. They're by a pool and Eric has a bag of ice on his pelvis because of some friction issues. A guy pops up and Eric freaks on him and strips down.
TV Title: Gunner vs. D-Von
Gunner jumps him and we're off and not quite running. D-Von comes back with his right hands but runs into an elbow. Clothesline gets two for Gunner. He beats on Gunner for a bit until D-Von comes back with a shoulder block. Thesz Press sets up a headbutt and more jumping moves. Spinebuster finishes clean at 4:07.
Here's Storm for the big talk post Lockdown. After a break he apologizes to his family and thought that Roode being looked at by medics was enough. Then he had to drive home and look at his daughter when she asked where the belt was. He couldn't look himself in the eyes either because he didn't want to see a failure. Storm says he beat himself and talks about all the work he's put in to get here. His biggest apology is to his dad though, because that's who he let down the most. Roode said that Storm's luck has run out and maybe that's true. He drops the mic and walks away. Really good promo.
Rob Van Dam vs. Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy
Winner gets Roode at Sacrifice. Everyone attacks everyone to start with no one getting a distinct advantage. Jeff's sitout gordbuster gets two on RVD. Hardy gets sent into the post and Anderson hooks a chinlock on Van Dam. Whisper in the Wind takes Anderson down and it's into one of the triple threat formulas, this one being everyone takes everyone down and no one gets a long term advantage. Twist to Anderson and Jeff hits the Swanton but Van Dam kicks his head off before a cover. Five Star hits Anderson and a backslide to Hardy gives Rob the win at 5:24.
Results
Bully Ray/Crimson b. Matt Morgan/Austin Aries – Ray pinned Aries with a rollup
Kurt Angle b. AJ Styles – Rolup
Brooke Tessmacher/Tara/Mickie James/Velvet Sky b. Gail Kim/Rosita/Sarita/Madison Rayne – Tessmacher pinned Kim with a rollup
D-Von b. Gunner – Spinebuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff Hardy and Mr. Anderson – Backslide to Hardy
Friday
Smackdown
Date: April 20, 2012
Location: O2 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews
We're still in England this week for the last TV show of the tour. I don't remember anything being announced for tonight's show so I'm really not sure what to expect from it. We'll probably get more build to Bryan vs. Sheamus as well as hopefully a few more matches added to the thin card. Let's get to it.
Do you know your enemy? Mine is an annoying piece of malware at the moment.
There's a six man tag main event: Cody/Bryan/Henry vs. Orton/Sheamus/Khali.
Here's Bryan to open the show. He talks about how Sheamus didn't do anything better than him at Wrestlemania. Instead of facing him like a man, Sheamus took the coward's way out and jumped Bryan from behind like he's done to everyone. At Extreme Rules he won't get jumped or be distracted. So now it's back to Chicago where he shocked the world by winning the MITB case. He'll beat Sheamus twice in the two out of three falls match and get back his rightful title. Did Sheamus cheat at Wrestlemania? YES! Will Bryan win the title back at Extreme Rules? YES!
Cue AJ to a lot of booing. How can you boo someone that looks like that? Bryan tells her to turn around and go away but she says this is the only way she can talk to him. AJ asks if she can just talk to him about their problems but Bryan says he has no problems. He had one, but he got rid of her. Bryan regrets ever going out with her in the first place and he wishes that she was never even born. That finally gets the people to boo Bryan. He asks if there's any chance he'd ever take AJ back and answers with an emphatic NO before leaving.
AJ vs. Natalya
AJ starts off all stoic but suddenly explodes on Natalya, beating her into the corner. The referee pulls her off twice but AJ won't let up, drawing a DQ at 48 seconds.
Damien Sandow talks about something Benjamin Franklin said and runs down Dancing With The Stars and Hoarders. At least with Dancing it's about something that involves work and talent. Most of the other shows he criticizes I completely agree with him on.
Brodus Clay vs. Hunico
Brodus has something to say. He says cut the music and gets booed, prompting him to say it's coming, so don't worry. His little brother is supposed to be here so he sends the Funkadactyls (the girls) to go find him. And it's Horny. Cole's reaction is exactly what mind is. At least the Mama and the Bridge Club was something original. Brodus does his shaking and Horny gets in to do it as well. Hunico becomes my new hero by shoving him down. The squash commences and the splash ends it in 1:10, about 25 seconds of which was spent on the Hornswoggle part.
Horny hits the Tadpole Splash post match. I hope this isn't permanent.
Teddy is looking for Aksana but finds Titus and Young who are new to Smackdown. They laugh at him for not signing them and now being a gopher. Ace pops up and they all make fun of Teddy. Titus/Young leave so Ace puts one of those big black furry Queen's guard hats on Teddy who isn't allowed to talk or move for the rest of the night.
Orton is in the back with Striker and we get a video on the attack on Cowboy Bob last week. Orton, with his growing mutton chops, says that his dad will be fine. On the other hand, Kane isn't going to be fine. They have a match at Extreme Rules and it's falls count anywhere.
Usos vs. Titus O'Neal/Darren Young
NXT comes to Fridays. I forgot how annoying Titus' song was. Young starts with Jimmy who hits a spinning forearm for two. Off to Jey who hits some double chops before bringing Jimmy back in. Titus comes in and the fans do not care at all. He uses his power stuff and gets a small reaction off a European Uppercut. Back to Young who hits a neckbreaker for two. The fans are waking up a bit. A tag brings in Jimmy who gets the only solid reaction for the US shout to the crowd. Jey gets sent to the floor and a blind tag allows Young and Titus to hit a Hart Attack out of the corner for the pin.
The Raw ReBound is about Jericho vs. Punk.
Alberto Del Rio vs. Big Show
Non-title. Del Rio drives an Aston Martin here which is very appropriate. Del Rio has officially been traded to the Smackdown roster with no compensation announced yet. Big Show blocks Del Rio's offense out of the corner and shoves him down. Show stands on his chest in the corner and chops it for good measure. An elbow follows for two. Show loads up the big punch but Del Rio kicks him in the knee to take him down.
More kicks to the arm by Del Rio follow and he hooks an armbar. Show shrugs it off but the chokeslam is broken up by a kick to the knee. The Codebreaker to the arm sets up the armbreaker but Show lifts him up with the bad arm into kind of an Angle Slam minus the spin. Show spears him down and calls for the chokeslam. Ricardo gets up on the apron and Cody comes in with the Disaster Kick, giving Del Rio the pin.
Cody runs away post match.
Drew McIntyre and Heath Slater are watching the following squash.
Danny Lerman vs. Ryback
Same deal as always but this time it's a British guy. Lerman hits him and is promptly mangled. Clothesline and MuscleBuster variation win in 1:11.
We get the Brock interview from Raw.
Teddy is still standing in the same place although he's now in a full uniform. Regal pops up for some jokes and leaves. Aksana's music hits and HOKEY SMOKE THAT'S CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI! He's playing the Antonio Cesaro character here, a European rugby player. Ace pops out of his office and invites them in. I'm not British so maybe I don't get it, but what's the point of guards that aren't allowed to move? Couldn't that create some security risks?
Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Great Khali/Randy Orton
Main event time. Cody jumps Khali and hits him in the knee as Khali is getting in. Trainers come out and say Khali can't go. Big Show comes out to replace him.
Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes/Mark Henry vs. Sheamus/Big Show/Randy Orton
The match is joined in progress after a break with Randy pounding on Bryan in the corner. Tag to Sheamus so Bryan bails to the corner to tag in Cody. The champ knocks Cody around and hits the rolling fireman's carry slam for two. Cody's neckbreaker is countered and Sheamus throws him into position for the ten forearms. Cody reverses a suplex and sends Sheamus to the floor. A baseball slide by Cody sets up the knee off the apron from Bryan, which I think is the same thing that's happened to him for three or four weeks in a row.
Bryan comes in to stomp on Sheamus now with a YES for each connecting boot. Henry comes in for some choking and it's back to Rhodes. He works on the arm of the champ and then into a chinlock. Sheamus fights out of that as well and knocks Cody out of the air on the Disaster Kick attempt. Hot tag to Orton and it's powerslams for all normal sized heels. Cody gets in a shot though and it's time for a break.
Back with Henry holding Orton in a neck crank and it's back to Bryan. A running dropkick in the corner gets two. A top rope splash misses and Orton makes the tag to Big Show who faces Henry. Cody manages a knee to the back and Mark clotheslines Show down. The heels beat on him and Cody hooks a figure four that his daddy would be ashamed of. While the hold is still on, Cody makes a tag to Henry who splashes Show for two.
Bryan drops an elbow for two. Hot tag to Sheamus to meet Bryan and the beating is on. Irish Curse gets two with Cody making the save. Rhodes rolls to the floor and lands right in front of Show who knocks him out cold with the WMD. YES Lock is blocked by Sheamus but the Brogue Kick misses as well. Tag to Henry and Sheamus kicks his head off. Show adds the right hand and the RKO gets the pin at 13:20 shown of at least 16:50.
Show was limping post match.
Results
Natalya b. AJ via DQ when AJ wouldn't stop attacking Natalya in the corner
Brodus Clay b. Hunico – Big Splash
Titus O'Neal/Darren Young b. Usos – Hart Attack out of the corner
Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Pin after a Disaster Kick from Cody Rhodes
Ryback b. Danny Lerman – MuscleBuster
Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Mark Henry/Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes – RKO to Henry
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
Nothing.
Quick Results
Monday Night Raw
CM Punk b. Mark Henry – Chair shot from the top rope
Santino Marella b. David Otunga – Cobra
Daniel Bryan b. Sheamus – Yes Lock
Brodus Clay b. Dolph Ziggler via DQ when Jack Swagger interfered
Great Khali/Big Show b. Epico/Primo – Chokeslam to Primo
Lord Tensai b. John Cena – Chokebomb
NXT
Percy Watson b. Johnny Curtis – Persecution
Maxine b. Kaitlyn – Dragon Sleeper
Tyler Reks b. Curt Hawkins – Rollup
Impact Wrestling
Bully Ray/Crimson b. Matt Morgan/Austin Aries – Ray pinned Aries with a rollup
Kurt Angle b. AJ Styles – Rolup
Brooke Tessmacher/Tara/Mickie James/Velvet Sky b. Gail Kim/Rosita/Sarita/Madison Rayne – Tessmacher pinned Kim with a rollup
D-Von b. Gunner – Spinebuster
Rob Van Dam b. Jeff Hardy and Mr. Anderson – Backslide to Hardy
Smackdown
Natalya b. AJ via DQ when AJ wouldn't stop attacking Natalya in the corner
Brodus Clay b. Hunico – Big Splash
Titus O'Neal/Darren Young b. Usos – Hart Attack out of the corner
Alberto Del Rio b. Big Show – Pin after a Disaster Kick from Cody Rhodes
Ryback b. Danny Lerman – MuscleBuster
Big Show/Randy Orton/Sheamus b. Mark Henry/Daniel Bryan/Cody Rhodes – RKO to Henry