klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Alberto Del Rio has a minor groin tear and will be out four to seven weeks.
Monday Night Raw
Date: December 26, 2011
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
After last week's solid show, we close out the year with this one. There are still five weeks before the Rumble so they could easily burn another show here and things would still be fine. It should be interesting to see where they go here because there really aren't any matches set up for the PPV, other than maybe Ziggler vs. Ryder II. Other than that there isn't anything really clear. Let's get to it.
Here's Punk....and never mind as it's Ace coming out to his music and in a Punk shirt. He says it's a microcosm of the unpredictability that you've gotten under his leadership. The future begins tonight and here's Punk. After a loud chant for him, he says that if he didn't know any better, Ace is trying to antagonize him. Why shouldn't Punk just kick him in the face right now? Ace says he can't because he'll get fired.
Tonight, Punk has the night off. Oh and he's kidding again. Tonight Punk is wrestling up to three times in a gauntlet match. If any of them beats him, that person gets a title shot next week. Punk wants to know what happens if he wins all three matches. Ace doesn't know, so Punk suggests he gets a shot at Ace if he does. Ace eventually agrees. Punk's posing is cut off by the latest video. It says he is coming and that he'll reclaim what is his. The words this time are The End Begins Next Monday.
Booker T vs. Cody Rhodes
Non-title here. Cole and Jerry has an actual lighthearted argument over who sang Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Hiptoss gives Booker an early advantage and a slam gets two. Snap suplex gets one. Axe kick misses though and Rhodes takes over with a neckbreaker. Out to the floor goes Booker and we take a break. Back with Booker taking over. He spins into the corner though and an elbow takes him down. Off to a crossface chickenwing
Clothesline gets two for Cody. The fans of course chant for Booker and Cody is getting frustrated. Booker fights back and it's boo/yay tonight. Cody dropkicks him down and works the arm. Camel clutch goes on and Booker gets sent into the corner. He gets his feet up though and looks like he needs oxygen. Side slam gets two. The Jack Brisco sunset flip doesn't look that good as it gets two. Rollup gets two for Cody. The Beautiful Disaster looks to have been short and it gets two. Cross Rhodes is countered but the side kick misses. The axe kick hits though and it gets the clean pin at 12:06.
Ryder tells Cena that he owes Cena for everything. Cena says no, you don't. Everything was Ryder getting here on his own. Cena is going a-Kane hunting though.
Jerry got a note saying that we'll learn the three opponents for Ace soon. Oh ok he's going to announce them. The three opponents are Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler and Mark Henry.
Kelly has some weird flirting moment with Show when a referee says he's needed elsewhere.
Ace says Brodus is debuting next week on Raw. Show comes in and Ace talks about Otunga jumping him last week. Otunga says that's a lawsuit and Show says he can beat Otunga with an arm behind his back.
Swagger and Ziggler trade insults when Vickie comes in and says it doesn't matter who gets the show. Henry comes in and says excuse me. Ok then.
Eve Torres/Zack Ryder vs. Tyson Kidd/Natalya
….seriously? This is kind of a step down for Ryder isn't it? Eh well he was getting over and he wasn't in the original WWE plans so you know they're not going to be happy with it. Cole says that July 23rd will be the 1000th episode of Raw. Oh my that could be BAD. The guys start and nothing happens so it's off to the chicks. Eve does her dancing moonsault and it's back to the guys. We get stereo Broski Boots and the Rough Ryder ends this at 3:00. No idea why Ryder was in this.
Here's Cena who isn't well received by the fans. He acknowledges that the fans aren't happy with him and there's a Cena Sucks chant. Cena talks about how there's magic in this building in the form of three Wrestlemanias. Chicago inducted Eddie Guerrero into the Hall of Fame, which draws an Eddie chant. Also, right here in this building, CM Punk beat him for the WWE Championship.
New York is considered the capital of the WWE, but after seeing another show like this here in Chicago, he's not sure about that. Cena has somehow gotten the Chicago crowd on his side. Right now though, he's going to call out Kane. Cue Miz instead. Miz wants to face him right now because the win at Mania was tainted. Miz wants Rock to beat Cena and tonight he wants the last image of 2011 to be him standing tall over Cena. Cena wants Miz to shut up and wash the tan off his body. Get a referee out here right now and let's do it.
John Cena vs. The Miz
The fan that catches Cena's shirt won't throw it back. Good, he'd be stupid to do so. Cena controls early with a headlock and the fans are split on him. That's a step up for him in Chicago. Miz heads to the floor and grabs a mic. The fans are chanting for the wrong person so he's out of here. It's a countout at 2:30, most of which happened during Miz ranting against Chicago.
Miz sets for his catchphrase and here's R-Truth for the on the floor brawl. So I guess Truth is face again. He destroys Miz and says he could finish Miz right now, but there's no fun in that. It's like Christmas: once you open the presents, it's all over. Every Monday Night should be like Christmas, so he's going to take his time getting to Miz, because Little Jimmy says it's ok. Truth hits him with a water bottle to end this.
Kane is officially here.
Big Show vs. David Otunga
Show must have an arm tied behind his back. It's the right arm too so there's no knockout punch or chokeslam. He'll be at the relentless mercy of the offense of DAVID OTUNGA. Otunga gets sent to the floor and here's Mark Henry. The match is officially thrown out at 2:00 despite Henry not touching him.
Henry clotheslines him down and here's Bryan to distract show. He runs and Henry gets the arm loose. Otunga breaks up a chokeslam and takes it himself. Show officially wins by DQ. HENRY NEVER TOUCHED HIM!!!!
Here's Del Rio but in a wheelchair. Ricardo, in a neckbrace, does the intro anyway. Jerry makes me laugh by giving us the information of the wheelchair, which is valued at about $200! Del Rio confirms the true rumor that he tore his groin last week. He says he'll be back and here are the Bellas to berate the crowd. One of them says they'll throw a party in his honor. It's Nikki apparently. They get in an argument over who gets to throw the party so Alberto yells at them. He throws them out and blast it as they were looking good tonight. His New Year's Resolution is that he'll be champion again.
CM Punk vs. Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler/Mark Henry
It's a gauntlet match and if someone beats Punk, they get a title shot next week. If Punk sweeps it, he gets a match with Ace, presumably tonight. The opponents are in the order listed so Swagger is up first. Swagger hooks a test of strength but Punk stays on his head to keep from going down. Here come the kicks but Jack comes back with a gutbuster to take over.
Punk tries a cross body off the top but Swagger (almost) catches him in another gutbuster for two. At least he has a strategy. He sets for the Vader Bomb but Punk jumps up and catches him in the GTS position. That doesn't work so Punk kicks him in the head for the pin at 3:27. Here's Ziggler next but Swagger takes out the knee almost immediately before the bell.
Punk says he can go and we take a break. Back with Ziggler working on the knee. Sweet dropkick gets two for Dolph. Punk fights back with a slingshot and tries a neckbreaker but Dolph goes back to the leg. Off to a half crab which lasts awhile. Punk fights back and the knee isn't hurting so much now.
Using the good leg he fires off some kicks to the back and a big kick to the head for two. Fameasser is blocked and there's the running knee in the corner. Vickie breaks up the GTS and the Fameasser hits this time for two. Cue Johnny Ace who ejects Vickie and Swagger. This is happening while Punk has Ziggler covered. The distraction lets the Zig Zag end Punk at 13:27.
Here's Kane to end the show. He talks about how the mask is his real face and everyone else is hiding. Cue Cena but Kane throws up a wall of fire to stop him. Kane says Cena is his target because Cena preaches to rise above hate. This world is a dark place and people should hate. Everyone hates, so why rise above it? He says that there's hatred in Cena but he's hiding from it. There's a Cena chant. In Chicago. Man that's scary.
Kane talks about how Cena will be free once he embraces the hate. Now the chant is dueling so the world is more correct. The people are going to help Cena embrace his hate. The last thing Cena will hear is them chanting Cena sucks. Kane needs some lessons from the Spirit Squad because they don't go along with Kane's idea. There's a mild dueling chant and Cena has to overact and make it seem like it was deafining. He hangs his head to end the show.
Results
Booker T b. Cody Rhodes – Axe Kick
Zack Ryder/Eve Torres b. Tyson Kidd/Natalya – Rough Ryder to Kidd
John Cena b. The Miz via countout
Big Show b. David Otunga via DQ when Mark Henry interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. CM Punk – Zig Zag
Tuesday
Smackdown got a 2.0, about the same as last week.
Orton was injured at the Smackdown taping. No word on how severe.
Wednesday
Raw got a 2.9.
NXT
Date: December 28, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Matt Striker, Josh Matthews
It continues. Anyway here we have another edition in the never ending saga that is the fifth season of NXT. I know I say that a lot, but what else is there really to say at this point? We have a love triangle regarding Bateman, Curtis and Maxine, which would be a bit better if the people in it were interesting. Anyway let's get to it.
Striker is in the ring and says that in three weeks, we'll be having NXT's 100th show. A lot of people got their start here, so here's Justin Gabriel. Before he can say anything though, here's Slater. He talks about carrying Gabriel all the time and reiterates that he's the One Man Rock Band. Someone find out what that's supposed to mean. I'd really like to know. Gabriel asks him just that and Slater says that he plays instruments. Striker makes the match.
Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater
Slater hides in the corner as Josh tries to get the nickname Capetown Werewolf over for Gabriel. Striker goes over some of the history of NXT, such as Zack Ryder being the pro for Titus O'Neil back in Season 2. They speed things up and the fans like Gabriel's speed moves. Gabriel works on the arm and the fans aren't exactly thrilled with this. I can't say I blame them. This has been pretty dull stuff so far. A clothesline puts Slater on the floor and Gabriel hits a big flip dive to the floor as we take a break.
Back with Gabriel breaking Slater's momentum with an STO. He loads up the 450 but Slater crotches him. Justin gets knocked to the floor and is holding his thigh a bit. That gets two back in the ring but the hand hit the mat three times. Time for a chinlock now. Gabriel gets a small package for two and it's back to the chinlock, both of which have been by Slater. Josh says this is his favorite season of NXT. The man has no taste.
Justin fires off some kicks and a springboard crossbody gets two. Striker takes credit for this (with a Barry Horowitz reference) as Gabriel's second 450 attempt gets the same result. They slug it out from their knees and Justin hits an Eye of the Hurricane and a top rope Lionsault for two. You can hear what sounds like the referee saying “go home” and Slater hits a spinebuster for two. They go up to the corner and Slater is knocked throat first onto the top rope. A springboard 450 gives Gabriel the win at 13:02.
Raw Recap eats up a few minutes and focuses on Punk and the gauntlet.
Bateman comes up to Maxine in the back and says they're both crazy so they're perfect for each other. Maxine says that she didn't like the weekly pillow fights and having to watch Titanic every week with his head on her shoulder. He says he'll get her back and kisses her. That earns him a slap. They leave and we see Curtis watching from the shadows and being very happy about what he saw.
Percy Watson vs. Tyson Kidd
Darren Young is on commentary. Watson controls to start and Young complains as a distraction to let Tyson take over. Tyson hammers on him for a few minutes and you can hear individual fans shouting in the crowd. Watson gets a dropkick and makes a comeback. This crowd is almost eerie. Kidd jumps into a dropkick and there's the spinning splash for two. Young gets up and distracts Watson so Kidd can hit a spinning fisherman's neckbreaker for the pin at 4:00.
Aksana comes up to Maxine and and shows her some e-mails she found on Teddy's phone. They're from Bateman and says that he's looking forward to being a Smackdown Superstar but to keep Maxine on NXT because she drags him down.
Johnny Curtis vs. Derrick Bateman
Brawl to start and Bateman takes over with loud clotheslines. They fall to the floor after more beating by Bateman. The crowd sounds like they're at a funeral. Curtis takes over and Maxine takes over again. After a break Curtis is still in control. Clothesline gets two. This is one of the least interesting matches I've seen in years. And then Bateman rolls him up for the pin at 7:10.
Bateman gets on his knee as Maxine gets in the ring. She walks past him and Curtis comes back out. They kiss and leave together.
Results
Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater – Springboard 450 Splash
Tyson Kidd b. Percy Watson – Spinning Fisherman's Neckbreaker
Derrick Bateman b. Johnny Curtis – Rollup
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: December 29, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
It's the last show of the year and we have one more Impact after this before we get to Genesis. Unless my memory is off (and it very well may be), there are only two matches set: D-Von vs. Pope and the title match. There are a lot of other matches which you can pretty much assume but I don't think they've been named yet. I'd expect a lot of that tonight. Let's get to it.
We open with a video about the Knockouts situation.
Gail and Madison come to the ring with the latter demanding Tara and Tessmacher get out here now. She says that she needs to get rid of the diseases that Tara and Tessmacher carry around with them. And they're both fired. Cue Sting and Madison kind of panics. She says she has this under control but Sting says it's not over until he says it's over. Madison doesn't have a legally binding contract like Karen had so she has no power. They get into a funny shouting contest and Gail has to defend against Mickie tonight.
Steiner tells Abyss that they're the best team out there. Abyss agrees that they're a team. Ok then.
Wildcard Tag Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Abyss/Scott Steiner vs. AJ Styles/Kazarian
Kaz vs. Steiner start us off but Scott yells at AJ before the match gets going. Nothing happens there so it's off to the Grand Slam winners. AJ uses strikes and avoids the power. Steiner cheats a bit and Shock Treatment gets no cover on AJ. Steiner comes in and beats on AJ some more but AJ hits a Pele to counter.
Double tag brings in Kaz vs. Abyss in I guess a rematch from the X Title match earlier this year. Man that sounds like forever again. Kaz fires off whatever he can including a springboard tornado DDT for two. Chokeslam is countered into a victory roll for two. The second attempt at a chokeslam puts Kaz down and Abyss knocks AJ into the barricade. He brings in Steiner...and hits him with the Black Hole Slam to send the former Fourtune guys to the finals at 7:50.
Ray comes out to yell at Abyss post match and we take a break.
Post break Ray yells at him and says he's tired of Abyss being a bully to him and Steiner. Abyss grabs him by the throat and Ray asks him what it'll take to get him back into Immortal. Abyss wants Ray one on one at Genesis. If Abyss loses, he's back into Immortal. Ray goes to leave but Abyss stops him. The match is Monster's Ball.
Sting is with Kurt in the back and they talk about the incident last week in Tennessee. It's Angle vs. Storm at the PPV and Kurt is getting a tuneup match tonight. It's with RVD.
Flair and Gunner say Gunner will be great. Gunner is in action later tonight. Flair looks really old. Gunner is looking to put someone in an ambulance tonight.
Anthony Nese vs. Zema Ion
It's the final match in the series and it's contract on a pole. Well what else would it be? Aries is in on commentary here. The winner of this joins Aries, Kash and Sorensen. According to Aries, Ion has pole experience while being an exotic dancer. Both guys tease going for the pole but it turns into your regular “I go for the pole, you stop me then you go for the pole and I stop you.”
They go to the floor where Nese takes over. Nese goes for the contract but Ion saves. Ion goes for the contract but Nese saves. Nese hits a German off the top but hangs himself in the Tree of Woe. He goes for the contract again but gets shoved into the barricade. And then Ion gets the contract at 4:33.
Gunner vs. Douglas Williams
Total dominance for awhile by Gunner and then they go to the floor. Gunner shoves the referee and it's a DQ at 1:38.
Williams takes the DDT on the concrete post match.
Roode's family still doesn't like him.
Here's Roode who says it's no shock that he's selfish. His friends and family have all turned their backs on him, but tonight he's brought one of his friends here. This name is Tracy and they've been friends for over twenty years. Tracy stands up and gets an ovation for some reason. Roode apologizes for not answering his calls and texts lately. Tracy has been brought here tonight to say whatever he wants.
He talks about how everyone is missing him and wondering where Roode has been. His wife wants to know where he is and his kids want to know why Tracy is driving them to hockey practice. Bobby can still come home. Roode says that back in high school, Tracy was his lackey. Roode says his family's fifteen minutes of fame are up and goes to leave, then he beats Tracy up. Jeff runs out for the save.
Eric and ODB have more “comedy”.
Angle rants about facing RVD later tonight.
Wildcard Tag Team Tournament Semi-Finals: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. ODB/Eric Young
Eric locks up with Tenay on the way to the ring. See it's funny. Eric and Magnus start but ODB comes in before there's any contact. There's no contact as both circle the other in a flirty manner. Magnus' face goes into her boobs and Joe is like “dude, the pay better be worth this.” Tag off to Eric who strips and comes in. Remember when Joe says Eric was all awesome at Turning Point 07? I don't think this is what he intended. Joe comes in and has a decent mini-match with Eric. ODB gets launched to the floor and the MuscleBuster sends Joe and Magnus to the finals at 5:14.
Mickie says the title match will be interesting.
Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam
So the girls are main eventing? Ok then. Basic stuff to start as neither guy has much of an advantage so far. Rob kicks a lot and hits Rolling Thunder for two. Kurt snaps off a belly to belly for the same and a regular suplex gets two also. After a quick chinlock Van Dam takes over again with some clotheslines. Kurt gets in a shot and tries a superkick but Van Dam takes him down. Five Star misses and there's the ankle lock. And here's Storm to superkick Angle for the DQ at 5:17.
RVD isn't thrilled with Storm coming out there.
Angle isn't either.
Storm says he's coming for Angle.
Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Gail Kim
Mickie grabs a rollup for two almost immediately. Thesz Press hits and Mickie takes over. Mickie sends her to the floor but misses a baseball slide. A neckbreaker hits though and we take a break. Back with a slugout on the floor won by Gail as they go back into the ring. Gail grabs the arm for some cranking.
Mickie fights back but Gail hooks Inoki's Octopus Hold. I can't say I'm complaining about the visual. Mickie rolls into the ropes so Gail tries it again but it doesn't work as well this time. Ok so maybe it does. After she gets done with that, a missile dropkick gets two for the champ. Eat Defeat is countered and Mickie hits a kick of her own to put both chicks down. Mickie makes her comeback and goes up but Gail heads to the floor. Mickie tries a Thesz Press to the floor but leaves it short so it doesn't look that great. Her knee is hurt so a masked chick runs in, hits the Rayne Drop on Mickie and Gail get the pin at 14:17.
Post match, yep that's Madison with facepaint.
Results
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Abyss/Scott Steiner – Kazarian b. Steiner after a Black Hole Slam from Abyss
Zema Ion b. Anthony Nese – Ion grabbed the contract
Douglas Williams b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner shoved the referee
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. ODB/Eric Young – MuscleBuster to Young
Gail Kim b. Mickie James – Pin after a Rayne Drop from Madison Rayne
Friday
Impact got a 1.15.
The average Impact rating for the year is a 1.17, the highest ever. Last year the average was 1.06 total and 1.11 on Thursdays. The previous record was 1.15 in 2009.
Smackdown
Date: December 30, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T
It's the final show of the year and we close things out with the Blue Guys. As long as it's not Blue Meanie I'm cool with that. Anyway tonight we should get some advancement in the three way world title feud. I hope they don't make Bryan look like a joke in this that can't get in any offense and has to escape with whatever kind of win he can get. Those title reigns completely defeat the purpose of being a champion. Then again so does MITB in general but whatever. Let's get to it.
We open with a video about Barrett vs. Orton. Their match tonight is the main event and it's falls count anywhere. I'm curious to see how this ends, which I'm sure you've heard about already.
Do you know your enemy? Mine is the number 2012, since I'll be writing 2011 for at least two more weeks.
Here's Booker coming out to do commentary. You know, his job. I wonder if he gets his pay docked for being late like this. He talks about how this has been a great year for him, starting with the Rumble and then joining the commentary booth. Then on Monday he beat Cody Rhodes and that's all because of the fans. He goes for his catchphrase but here's Cody to interrupt him.
Cody makes fun of local spots teams and the Indy 500 because that's what heels do. No seriously, it's a fine way to get the crowd booing you so why not do it? Rhodes talks about his year, ranging from being injured to beating Mysterio to winning the IC Title. Then he took a washed up announcer and pushed him to regain some of his former glory. Booker says that when he beat Cody on Monday, he wasn't that washed up. If Cody respected the business, he'd be congratulating Booker right now.
The champ actually agrees and says that he doesn't want to come off as some kind of bitter jerk because he's better than that. He actually congratulates Booker and offers a handshake. Booker shakes it and gets in his face a bit but turns to leave. Cody says of course now this is all over. Booker isn't sure what he means by that, but Cody says the fairy tale is over and Booker is nothing but a nostalgia act. If Booker keeps competing, his skills will be exposed as being gone. If he goes back to announcing, he'll be exposed as an illiterate moron. In short, Booker is a joke.
Cue....Dustin Rhodes? He comes out to the Goldust music but he's in a suit and no makeup. Dustin says he loves his brother very much but Cody is going about this all wrong. Booker is someone that Cody should respect because it was Booker that inspired Dustin to face his demons and make a comeback. Dustin gets the idea of building your own legacy, but don't do it at Booker's expense. Cody knows better than this.
Cody chuckles at this and says that as soon as Booker stopped teaming with him, Dustin fell back into those demons and then into utter obscurity. Booker gets in Cody's face and asks for a third match with Cody since it's one apiece at the moment. He wants to do it right now but Cody says we'll do it next week. Booker says that next week it'll be a celebration when he becomes the new Intercontinental Champion. Booker leaves and Cody beats Dustin down. Booker makes the save but Cody is long gone. Not a bad opening segment.
Tonight's main event: it's a tag team match!
Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal
If DiBiase is supposed to be this everyman now, shouldn't he lose the I'm Rich theme song? They exchange quick control to start but Mahal keeps his, hitting a Vader Bomb knee drop for two. The crowd isn't exactly thrilled by DiBiase vs. Legs Mahal here. Ted gets in a few shots to slow Mahal down but tweeks his knee coming off the top. A Downward Spiral (so fed up with that move) sets up the Camel Clutch and Dibiase surprisinly taps at 2:50. Didn't see that one coming.
Teddy is talking about his New Year's Eve party tomorrow night when Aksana comes in. More flirtations are made and Drew McIntyre comes in. He's been signed back to Smackdown and Teddy is willing to forgive him. Drew isn't going to get paid what he was getting earlier when his career has fallen apart. He gets Big Zeke tonight and if he doesn't win, his job might be in jeopardy. Drew talks about the time he made Teddy beg for mercy and says that's nothing compared to what he'll do to Jackson.
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn vs. Natalya/Tamina
Tamina looks better with straight hair. The lack of JTG helps a lot also. Tamina vs. Kaitlyn starts us off. The evil ones take over on Kaitlyn and beat her down. Something like a Michinoku Driver by Natalya does nothing here as Kaitlyn makes the tag about two seconds later. Alicia hits the axe kick on Nattie for the pin at 1:34. Why do they bother with these matches? I honestly don't know.
Tamina beats up Natalya post match, including a Superfly Splash.
Don't be a bully.
Raw ReBound eats up some time.
We get a standard recap of Show vs. Otunga on Monday with Henry coming in as well. Bryan made the save.
Speaking of Bryan, he's in the back talking with AJ (who looks GREAT tonight in a black cut off top and jeans) about how he saved Big Show. Show comes up and asks to talk to Bryan alone. Show says that giants don't really need to be saved. Teddy comes in and says that the tag match main event won't be happening tonight as Otunga wants a rematch with Show. Henry will be in his corner. Bryan implies he'll have Show's back but doesn't exactly say it.
Justin Gabriel vs. Hunico
I think there's new music for Gabriel but I'm not 100% sure. Hunico comes out on a lowrider bicycle with his new bodyguard who used to be in FCW and is named Camacho here. I don't remember his FCW name. Further investigations (as in I looked it up on Wikipedia) says that his name there is Donny Marlow and his dad is more famous as Meng or Haku.
Cole says he has a lot of knowledge about lowrider bicycles. Hunico gets sent to the floor and Gabriel misses a dive. Cole gives us the history of lowrider bikes and all I can think of is....why? There's something about Eddie Munster mentioned in there. Justin misses a springboard something coming back in but hits a powerbomb style move to take over. Hunico breaks up the 450 and brings Gabriel down so that the Swanton can end this at 1:48. This was nothing and Camacho didn't get involved at all.
Hunico/Camacho hit something like Cryme Tyme's old finisher to leave Gabriel on the mat (Samoan Drop/neckbreaker combo).
Big Show vs. David Otunga
If nothing else we get the big knockout punch from last week which still looks great. Otunga has really long arms. Henry gets his own entrance. Show beats him down as Otunga tries to get in whatever offense he can. David bails to the floor where Henry gives him something resembling a pep talk. Back in a shoulder block puts Otunga down as does a corner splash. Henry gets on the apron to distract from the chokeslam and Otunga hits a chop block and DDT for two. Henry goes to get in the ring but Bryan pops up with a belt shot to stop him. The big punch knocks Otunga out cold at 3:24.
Ezekiel Jackson vs. Drew McIntyre
Jackson has some hair now. We get Drew's full entrance and I miss his song. Big Zeke controls with power for a few moments but Drew takes over pretty quickly. Jackson beats him down more and this match isn't going to last long. A big boot by Drew gets two. Northern lights suplex gets two. Jackson backdrops him and the fans don't care. Side slam gets two for the power man. Torture Rack is countered and Drew gets a boot up in the corner. It gets two even with his feet on the ropes. Drew argues with the ropes and Jackson rolls him up (with a big handful of tights) for the pin at 3:52.
Video on Sheamus. I think they aired this months ago. I remember the rock version of Written In My Face.
Drew yells about the tights in the back and Teddy says he can't stand losers. He's a ticked off Peanut here. Old school fans will get that joke.
Here's Sheamus for a little chat. “What's the crack Indianapolis?” Is that an Irish thing? He wants to talk about the future and by that he means the Royal Rumble. The winner gets a title match at Wrestlemania. He doesn't care who he eliminates because he's going to win the Rumble. Cue Hornswoggle to get on my nerves. Horny is going to enter the Rumble as well because miracles like Bryan beating Big Show can happen. He says he'll win (only saying his own name). Sheamus admires that and gives us some Irish folk lore or whatever you want to call it. He gets all mean but is only playing.
Cue Heath Slater who is a breath of air. I can't stand Horny at all. Slater mentions guys like Bushwhacker Luke and the Brooklyn Brawler, who fall into the same category as Horny: the guy that says they'll win and is a joke. Slater says he's the greatest redhead on Smackdown and the only reason Horny won the battle royal was because Sheamus didn't want to squash a leprechaun. Slater doesn't have that problem though. Sheamus gets in his face and....sings Don't Stop Believin. Ok then. Sheamus says he sees Slater as more of an R. Kelly kind of guy, because he believes he can fly, and there goes Slater. That was...yeah.
Sheamus vs. Heath Slater
Kind of awkward here as Sheamus was celebrating after throwing Slater out and we went to a break. Back and they're having a match. Sheamus pounds him down and works on the arm and then throws Heath to the apron. Slater slaps him and that was very stupid, so here are ten forearms to the chest for his efforts. Sheamus keeps countering him but Slater drop toeholds him into the middle buckle. Slater gets him onto the mat and hooks a chinlock. The counter to that triggers Sheamus' comeback which consists of forearms to the back, a top rope shoulder and the Brogue Kick for the pin at 4:45 shown.
Bryan is talking to Teddy when Show comes in. He's getting annoyed at Bryan for always being there. Bryan wants a thank you for being there to bail Show out. They start growling at each other and we're told that it's Show vs. Bryan for the title next week. Show laughs a lot at that. Bryan says even if he loses, his reign lasted longer than 45 seconds.
Whoever they are, they're still coming. I'm kind of curious about that but I'm expecting a letdown.
We hype the three big title matches spread over the next week of shows.
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett
Falls count anywhere. Slugout to start and Orton hammers him into the corner. Out to the floor and Barrett goes into the steps for two. With Barrett's head on the steps, a stomp gets two. Usually that would crack a skull but in wrestling it only gets two. That's why I love this stuff. RKO is countered and Orton goes into the post as we take a break.
Back with them in the ring and Barrett hammering away. He hits that running boot to Orton as Orton is sitting on the middle rope which gets two on the floor. Big boot in the ring gets two and we hit the chinlock. Middle rope elbow gets the same. Back to the chinlock as this has been a lot more basic than I was expecting. Orton gets in the powerslam but Barrett escapes the elevated DDT by heading to the floor.
Orton throws him over the table and they go into the crowd. They go into the back and Orton goes through a table. Randy sends him into an anvil case as Barrett tries to escape down the hall. The referee went down earlier so he's not here. They fight into an elevator and we actually cut to a security camera feed in the elevator.
They brawl out into what looks like a corporate area and a cameraman has to run to catch up to them. The camera goes through a door and we hear shouting and a crash. He catches up to them and Barrett is standing at the top of a flight of steps. Orton is laying at the bottom in a shape that probably isn't that comfortable. The camera looks down at him as he can barely move and we go off the air.
Results
Jinder Mahal b. Ted DiBiase – Camel Clutch
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn b. Natalya/Tamina – Axe Kick to Natalya
Hunico b. Justin Gabriel – Swanton Bomb
Big Show b. David Otunga – WMD
Drew McIntyre b. Ezekiel Jackson – Rollup
Sheamus b. Heath Slater – Brogue Kick
Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton went to a no contest
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
See also: Saturday.
Quick Results
Raw
Booker T b. Cody Rhodes – Axe Kick
Zack Ryder/Eve Torres b. Tyson Kidd/Natalya – Rough Ryder to Kidd
John Cena b. The Miz via countout
Big Show b. David Otunga via DQ when Mark Henry interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. CM Punk – Zig Zag
NXT
Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater – Springboard 450 Splash
Tyson Kidd b. Percy Watson – Spinning Fisherman's Neckbreaker
Derrick Bateman b. Johnny Curtis – Rollup
Impact Wrestling
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Abyss/Scott Steiner – Kazarian b. Steiner after a Black Hole Slam from Abyss
Zema Ion b. Anthony Nese – Ion grabbed the contract
Douglas Williams b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner shoved the referee
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. ODB/Eric Young – MuscleBuster to Young
Gail Kim b. Mickie James – Pin after a Rayne Drop from Madison Rayne
Smackdown
Jinder Mahal b. Ted DiBiase – Camel Clutch
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn b. Natalya/Tamina – Axe Kick to Natalya
Hunico b. Justin Gabriel – Swanton Bomb
Big Show b. David Otunga – WMD
Drew McIntyre b. Ezekiel Jackson – Rollup
Sheamus b. Heath Slater – Brogue Kick
Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton went to a no contest
Alberto Del Rio has a minor groin tear and will be out four to seven weeks.
Monday Night Raw
Date: December 26, 2011
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
After last week's solid show, we close out the year with this one. There are still five weeks before the Rumble so they could easily burn another show here and things would still be fine. It should be interesting to see where they go here because there really aren't any matches set up for the PPV, other than maybe Ziggler vs. Ryder II. Other than that there isn't anything really clear. Let's get to it.
Here's Punk....and never mind as it's Ace coming out to his music and in a Punk shirt. He says it's a microcosm of the unpredictability that you've gotten under his leadership. The future begins tonight and here's Punk. After a loud chant for him, he says that if he didn't know any better, Ace is trying to antagonize him. Why shouldn't Punk just kick him in the face right now? Ace says he can't because he'll get fired.
Tonight, Punk has the night off. Oh and he's kidding again. Tonight Punk is wrestling up to three times in a gauntlet match. If any of them beats him, that person gets a title shot next week. Punk wants to know what happens if he wins all three matches. Ace doesn't know, so Punk suggests he gets a shot at Ace if he does. Ace eventually agrees. Punk's posing is cut off by the latest video. It says he is coming and that he'll reclaim what is his. The words this time are The End Begins Next Monday.
Booker T vs. Cody Rhodes
Non-title here. Cole and Jerry has an actual lighthearted argument over who sang Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer. Hiptoss gives Booker an early advantage and a slam gets two. Snap suplex gets one. Axe kick misses though and Rhodes takes over with a neckbreaker. Out to the floor goes Booker and we take a break. Back with Booker taking over. He spins into the corner though and an elbow takes him down. Off to a crossface chickenwing
Clothesline gets two for Cody. The fans of course chant for Booker and Cody is getting frustrated. Booker fights back and it's boo/yay tonight. Cody dropkicks him down and works the arm. Camel clutch goes on and Booker gets sent into the corner. He gets his feet up though and looks like he needs oxygen. Side slam gets two. The Jack Brisco sunset flip doesn't look that good as it gets two. Rollup gets two for Cody. The Beautiful Disaster looks to have been short and it gets two. Cross Rhodes is countered but the side kick misses. The axe kick hits though and it gets the clean pin at 12:06.
Ryder tells Cena that he owes Cena for everything. Cena says no, you don't. Everything was Ryder getting here on his own. Cena is going a-Kane hunting though.
Jerry got a note saying that we'll learn the three opponents for Ace soon. Oh ok he's going to announce them. The three opponents are Jack Swagger, Dolph Ziggler and Mark Henry.
Kelly has some weird flirting moment with Show when a referee says he's needed elsewhere.
Ace says Brodus is debuting next week on Raw. Show comes in and Ace talks about Otunga jumping him last week. Otunga says that's a lawsuit and Show says he can beat Otunga with an arm behind his back.
Swagger and Ziggler trade insults when Vickie comes in and says it doesn't matter who gets the show. Henry comes in and says excuse me. Ok then.
Eve Torres/Zack Ryder vs. Tyson Kidd/Natalya
….seriously? This is kind of a step down for Ryder isn't it? Eh well he was getting over and he wasn't in the original WWE plans so you know they're not going to be happy with it. Cole says that July 23rd will be the 1000th episode of Raw. Oh my that could be BAD. The guys start and nothing happens so it's off to the chicks. Eve does her dancing moonsault and it's back to the guys. We get stereo Broski Boots and the Rough Ryder ends this at 3:00. No idea why Ryder was in this.
Here's Cena who isn't well received by the fans. He acknowledges that the fans aren't happy with him and there's a Cena Sucks chant. Cena talks about how there's magic in this building in the form of three Wrestlemanias. Chicago inducted Eddie Guerrero into the Hall of Fame, which draws an Eddie chant. Also, right here in this building, CM Punk beat him for the WWE Championship.
New York is considered the capital of the WWE, but after seeing another show like this here in Chicago, he's not sure about that. Cena has somehow gotten the Chicago crowd on his side. Right now though, he's going to call out Kane. Cue Miz instead. Miz wants to face him right now because the win at Mania was tainted. Miz wants Rock to beat Cena and tonight he wants the last image of 2011 to be him standing tall over Cena. Cena wants Miz to shut up and wash the tan off his body. Get a referee out here right now and let's do it.
John Cena vs. The Miz
The fan that catches Cena's shirt won't throw it back. Good, he'd be stupid to do so. Cena controls early with a headlock and the fans are split on him. That's a step up for him in Chicago. Miz heads to the floor and grabs a mic. The fans are chanting for the wrong person so he's out of here. It's a countout at 2:30, most of which happened during Miz ranting against Chicago.
Miz sets for his catchphrase and here's R-Truth for the on the floor brawl. So I guess Truth is face again. He destroys Miz and says he could finish Miz right now, but there's no fun in that. It's like Christmas: once you open the presents, it's all over. Every Monday Night should be like Christmas, so he's going to take his time getting to Miz, because Little Jimmy says it's ok. Truth hits him with a water bottle to end this.
Kane is officially here.
Big Show vs. David Otunga
Show must have an arm tied behind his back. It's the right arm too so there's no knockout punch or chokeslam. He'll be at the relentless mercy of the offense of DAVID OTUNGA. Otunga gets sent to the floor and here's Mark Henry. The match is officially thrown out at 2:00 despite Henry not touching him.
Henry clotheslines him down and here's Bryan to distract show. He runs and Henry gets the arm loose. Otunga breaks up a chokeslam and takes it himself. Show officially wins by DQ. HENRY NEVER TOUCHED HIM!!!!
Here's Del Rio but in a wheelchair. Ricardo, in a neckbrace, does the intro anyway. Jerry makes me laugh by giving us the information of the wheelchair, which is valued at about $200! Del Rio confirms the true rumor that he tore his groin last week. He says he'll be back and here are the Bellas to berate the crowd. One of them says they'll throw a party in his honor. It's Nikki apparently. They get in an argument over who gets to throw the party so Alberto yells at them. He throws them out and blast it as they were looking good tonight. His New Year's Resolution is that he'll be champion again.
CM Punk vs. Jack Swagger/Dolph Ziggler/Mark Henry
It's a gauntlet match and if someone beats Punk, they get a title shot next week. If Punk sweeps it, he gets a match with Ace, presumably tonight. The opponents are in the order listed so Swagger is up first. Swagger hooks a test of strength but Punk stays on his head to keep from going down. Here come the kicks but Jack comes back with a gutbuster to take over.
Punk tries a cross body off the top but Swagger (almost) catches him in another gutbuster for two. At least he has a strategy. He sets for the Vader Bomb but Punk jumps up and catches him in the GTS position. That doesn't work so Punk kicks him in the head for the pin at 3:27. Here's Ziggler next but Swagger takes out the knee almost immediately before the bell.
Punk says he can go and we take a break. Back with Ziggler working on the knee. Sweet dropkick gets two for Dolph. Punk fights back with a slingshot and tries a neckbreaker but Dolph goes back to the leg. Off to a half crab which lasts awhile. Punk fights back and the knee isn't hurting so much now.
Using the good leg he fires off some kicks to the back and a big kick to the head for two. Fameasser is blocked and there's the running knee in the corner. Vickie breaks up the GTS and the Fameasser hits this time for two. Cue Johnny Ace who ejects Vickie and Swagger. This is happening while Punk has Ziggler covered. The distraction lets the Zig Zag end Punk at 13:27.
Here's Kane to end the show. He talks about how the mask is his real face and everyone else is hiding. Cue Cena but Kane throws up a wall of fire to stop him. Kane says Cena is his target because Cena preaches to rise above hate. This world is a dark place and people should hate. Everyone hates, so why rise above it? He says that there's hatred in Cena but he's hiding from it. There's a Cena chant. In Chicago. Man that's scary.
Kane talks about how Cena will be free once he embraces the hate. Now the chant is dueling so the world is more correct. The people are going to help Cena embrace his hate. The last thing Cena will hear is them chanting Cena sucks. Kane needs some lessons from the Spirit Squad because they don't go along with Kane's idea. There's a mild dueling chant and Cena has to overact and make it seem like it was deafining. He hangs his head to end the show.
Results
Booker T b. Cody Rhodes – Axe Kick
Zack Ryder/Eve Torres b. Tyson Kidd/Natalya – Rough Ryder to Kidd
John Cena b. The Miz via countout
Big Show b. David Otunga via DQ when Mark Henry interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. CM Punk – Zig Zag
Tuesday
Smackdown got a 2.0, about the same as last week.
Orton was injured at the Smackdown taping. No word on how severe.
Wednesday
Raw got a 2.9.
NXT
Date: December 28, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Matt Striker, Josh Matthews
It continues. Anyway here we have another edition in the never ending saga that is the fifth season of NXT. I know I say that a lot, but what else is there really to say at this point? We have a love triangle regarding Bateman, Curtis and Maxine, which would be a bit better if the people in it were interesting. Anyway let's get to it.
Striker is in the ring and says that in three weeks, we'll be having NXT's 100th show. A lot of people got their start here, so here's Justin Gabriel. Before he can say anything though, here's Slater. He talks about carrying Gabriel all the time and reiterates that he's the One Man Rock Band. Someone find out what that's supposed to mean. I'd really like to know. Gabriel asks him just that and Slater says that he plays instruments. Striker makes the match.
Justin Gabriel vs. Heath Slater
Slater hides in the corner as Josh tries to get the nickname Capetown Werewolf over for Gabriel. Striker goes over some of the history of NXT, such as Zack Ryder being the pro for Titus O'Neil back in Season 2. They speed things up and the fans like Gabriel's speed moves. Gabriel works on the arm and the fans aren't exactly thrilled with this. I can't say I blame them. This has been pretty dull stuff so far. A clothesline puts Slater on the floor and Gabriel hits a big flip dive to the floor as we take a break.
Back with Gabriel breaking Slater's momentum with an STO. He loads up the 450 but Slater crotches him. Justin gets knocked to the floor and is holding his thigh a bit. That gets two back in the ring but the hand hit the mat three times. Time for a chinlock now. Gabriel gets a small package for two and it's back to the chinlock, both of which have been by Slater. Josh says this is his favorite season of NXT. The man has no taste.
Justin fires off some kicks and a springboard crossbody gets two. Striker takes credit for this (with a Barry Horowitz reference) as Gabriel's second 450 attempt gets the same result. They slug it out from their knees and Justin hits an Eye of the Hurricane and a top rope Lionsault for two. You can hear what sounds like the referee saying “go home” and Slater hits a spinebuster for two. They go up to the corner and Slater is knocked throat first onto the top rope. A springboard 450 gives Gabriel the win at 13:02.
Raw Recap eats up a few minutes and focuses on Punk and the gauntlet.
Bateman comes up to Maxine in the back and says they're both crazy so they're perfect for each other. Maxine says that she didn't like the weekly pillow fights and having to watch Titanic every week with his head on her shoulder. He says he'll get her back and kisses her. That earns him a slap. They leave and we see Curtis watching from the shadows and being very happy about what he saw.
Percy Watson vs. Tyson Kidd
Darren Young is on commentary. Watson controls to start and Young complains as a distraction to let Tyson take over. Tyson hammers on him for a few minutes and you can hear individual fans shouting in the crowd. Watson gets a dropkick and makes a comeback. This crowd is almost eerie. Kidd jumps into a dropkick and there's the spinning splash for two. Young gets up and distracts Watson so Kidd can hit a spinning fisherman's neckbreaker for the pin at 4:00.
Aksana comes up to Maxine and and shows her some e-mails she found on Teddy's phone. They're from Bateman and says that he's looking forward to being a Smackdown Superstar but to keep Maxine on NXT because she drags him down.
Johnny Curtis vs. Derrick Bateman
Brawl to start and Bateman takes over with loud clotheslines. They fall to the floor after more beating by Bateman. The crowd sounds like they're at a funeral. Curtis takes over and Maxine takes over again. After a break Curtis is still in control. Clothesline gets two. This is one of the least interesting matches I've seen in years. And then Bateman rolls him up for the pin at 7:10.
Bateman gets on his knee as Maxine gets in the ring. She walks past him and Curtis comes back out. They kiss and leave together.
Results
Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater – Springboard 450 Splash
Tyson Kidd b. Percy Watson – Spinning Fisherman's Neckbreaker
Derrick Bateman b. Johnny Curtis – Rollup
Thursday
Impact Wrestling
Date: December 29, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
It's the last show of the year and we have one more Impact after this before we get to Genesis. Unless my memory is off (and it very well may be), there are only two matches set: D-Von vs. Pope and the title match. There are a lot of other matches which you can pretty much assume but I don't think they've been named yet. I'd expect a lot of that tonight. Let's get to it.
We open with a video about the Knockouts situation.
Gail and Madison come to the ring with the latter demanding Tara and Tessmacher get out here now. She says that she needs to get rid of the diseases that Tara and Tessmacher carry around with them. And they're both fired. Cue Sting and Madison kind of panics. She says she has this under control but Sting says it's not over until he says it's over. Madison doesn't have a legally binding contract like Karen had so she has no power. They get into a funny shouting contest and Gail has to defend against Mickie tonight.
Steiner tells Abyss that they're the best team out there. Abyss agrees that they're a team. Ok then.
Wildcard Tag Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Abyss/Scott Steiner vs. AJ Styles/Kazarian
Kaz vs. Steiner start us off but Scott yells at AJ before the match gets going. Nothing happens there so it's off to the Grand Slam winners. AJ uses strikes and avoids the power. Steiner cheats a bit and Shock Treatment gets no cover on AJ. Steiner comes in and beats on AJ some more but AJ hits a Pele to counter.
Double tag brings in Kaz vs. Abyss in I guess a rematch from the X Title match earlier this year. Man that sounds like forever again. Kaz fires off whatever he can including a springboard tornado DDT for two. Chokeslam is countered into a victory roll for two. The second attempt at a chokeslam puts Kaz down and Abyss knocks AJ into the barricade. He brings in Steiner...and hits him with the Black Hole Slam to send the former Fourtune guys to the finals at 7:50.
Ray comes out to yell at Abyss post match and we take a break.
Post break Ray yells at him and says he's tired of Abyss being a bully to him and Steiner. Abyss grabs him by the throat and Ray asks him what it'll take to get him back into Immortal. Abyss wants Ray one on one at Genesis. If Abyss loses, he's back into Immortal. Ray goes to leave but Abyss stops him. The match is Monster's Ball.
Sting is with Kurt in the back and they talk about the incident last week in Tennessee. It's Angle vs. Storm at the PPV and Kurt is getting a tuneup match tonight. It's with RVD.
Flair and Gunner say Gunner will be great. Gunner is in action later tonight. Flair looks really old. Gunner is looking to put someone in an ambulance tonight.
Anthony Nese vs. Zema Ion
It's the final match in the series and it's contract on a pole. Well what else would it be? Aries is in on commentary here. The winner of this joins Aries, Kash and Sorensen. According to Aries, Ion has pole experience while being an exotic dancer. Both guys tease going for the pole but it turns into your regular “I go for the pole, you stop me then you go for the pole and I stop you.”
They go to the floor where Nese takes over. Nese goes for the contract but Ion saves. Ion goes for the contract but Nese saves. Nese hits a German off the top but hangs himself in the Tree of Woe. He goes for the contract again but gets shoved into the barricade. And then Ion gets the contract at 4:33.
Gunner vs. Douglas Williams
Total dominance for awhile by Gunner and then they go to the floor. Gunner shoves the referee and it's a DQ at 1:38.
Williams takes the DDT on the concrete post match.
Roode's family still doesn't like him.
Here's Roode who says it's no shock that he's selfish. His friends and family have all turned their backs on him, but tonight he's brought one of his friends here. This name is Tracy and they've been friends for over twenty years. Tracy stands up and gets an ovation for some reason. Roode apologizes for not answering his calls and texts lately. Tracy has been brought here tonight to say whatever he wants.
He talks about how everyone is missing him and wondering where Roode has been. His wife wants to know where he is and his kids want to know why Tracy is driving them to hockey practice. Bobby can still come home. Roode says that back in high school, Tracy was his lackey. Roode says his family's fifteen minutes of fame are up and goes to leave, then he beats Tracy up. Jeff runs out for the save.
Eric and ODB have more “comedy”.
Angle rants about facing RVD later tonight.
Wildcard Tag Team Tournament Semi-Finals: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. ODB/Eric Young
Eric locks up with Tenay on the way to the ring. See it's funny. Eric and Magnus start but ODB comes in before there's any contact. There's no contact as both circle the other in a flirty manner. Magnus' face goes into her boobs and Joe is like “dude, the pay better be worth this.” Tag off to Eric who strips and comes in. Remember when Joe says Eric was all awesome at Turning Point 07? I don't think this is what he intended. Joe comes in and has a decent mini-match with Eric. ODB gets launched to the floor and the MuscleBuster sends Joe and Magnus to the finals at 5:14.
Mickie says the title match will be interesting.
Kurt Angle vs. Rob Van Dam
So the girls are main eventing? Ok then. Basic stuff to start as neither guy has much of an advantage so far. Rob kicks a lot and hits Rolling Thunder for two. Kurt snaps off a belly to belly for the same and a regular suplex gets two also. After a quick chinlock Van Dam takes over again with some clotheslines. Kurt gets in a shot and tries a superkick but Van Dam takes him down. Five Star misses and there's the ankle lock. And here's Storm to superkick Angle for the DQ at 5:17.
RVD isn't thrilled with Storm coming out there.
Angle isn't either.
Storm says he's coming for Angle.
Knockouts Title: Mickie James vs. Gail Kim
Mickie grabs a rollup for two almost immediately. Thesz Press hits and Mickie takes over. Mickie sends her to the floor but misses a baseball slide. A neckbreaker hits though and we take a break. Back with a slugout on the floor won by Gail as they go back into the ring. Gail grabs the arm for some cranking.
Mickie fights back but Gail hooks Inoki's Octopus Hold. I can't say I'm complaining about the visual. Mickie rolls into the ropes so Gail tries it again but it doesn't work as well this time. Ok so maybe it does. After she gets done with that, a missile dropkick gets two for the champ. Eat Defeat is countered and Mickie hits a kick of her own to put both chicks down. Mickie makes her comeback and goes up but Gail heads to the floor. Mickie tries a Thesz Press to the floor but leaves it short so it doesn't look that great. Her knee is hurt so a masked chick runs in, hits the Rayne Drop on Mickie and Gail get the pin at 14:17.
Post match, yep that's Madison with facepaint.
Results
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Abyss/Scott Steiner – Kazarian b. Steiner after a Black Hole Slam from Abyss
Zema Ion b. Anthony Nese – Ion grabbed the contract
Douglas Williams b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner shoved the referee
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. ODB/Eric Young – MuscleBuster to Young
Gail Kim b. Mickie James – Pin after a Rayne Drop from Madison Rayne
Friday
Impact got a 1.15.
The average Impact rating for the year is a 1.17, the highest ever. Last year the average was 1.06 total and 1.11 on Thursdays. The previous record was 1.15 in 2009.
Smackdown
Date: December 30, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews, Booker T
It's the final show of the year and we close things out with the Blue Guys. As long as it's not Blue Meanie I'm cool with that. Anyway tonight we should get some advancement in the three way world title feud. I hope they don't make Bryan look like a joke in this that can't get in any offense and has to escape with whatever kind of win he can get. Those title reigns completely defeat the purpose of being a champion. Then again so does MITB in general but whatever. Let's get to it.
We open with a video about Barrett vs. Orton. Their match tonight is the main event and it's falls count anywhere. I'm curious to see how this ends, which I'm sure you've heard about already.
Do you know your enemy? Mine is the number 2012, since I'll be writing 2011 for at least two more weeks.
Here's Booker coming out to do commentary. You know, his job. I wonder if he gets his pay docked for being late like this. He talks about how this has been a great year for him, starting with the Rumble and then joining the commentary booth. Then on Monday he beat Cody Rhodes and that's all because of the fans. He goes for his catchphrase but here's Cody to interrupt him.
Cody makes fun of local spots teams and the Indy 500 because that's what heels do. No seriously, it's a fine way to get the crowd booing you so why not do it? Rhodes talks about his year, ranging from being injured to beating Mysterio to winning the IC Title. Then he took a washed up announcer and pushed him to regain some of his former glory. Booker says that when he beat Cody on Monday, he wasn't that washed up. If Cody respected the business, he'd be congratulating Booker right now.
The champ actually agrees and says that he doesn't want to come off as some kind of bitter jerk because he's better than that. He actually congratulates Booker and offers a handshake. Booker shakes it and gets in his face a bit but turns to leave. Cody says of course now this is all over. Booker isn't sure what he means by that, but Cody says the fairy tale is over and Booker is nothing but a nostalgia act. If Booker keeps competing, his skills will be exposed as being gone. If he goes back to announcing, he'll be exposed as an illiterate moron. In short, Booker is a joke.
Cue....Dustin Rhodes? He comes out to the Goldust music but he's in a suit and no makeup. Dustin says he loves his brother very much but Cody is going about this all wrong. Booker is someone that Cody should respect because it was Booker that inspired Dustin to face his demons and make a comeback. Dustin gets the idea of building your own legacy, but don't do it at Booker's expense. Cody knows better than this.
Cody chuckles at this and says that as soon as Booker stopped teaming with him, Dustin fell back into those demons and then into utter obscurity. Booker gets in Cody's face and asks for a third match with Cody since it's one apiece at the moment. He wants to do it right now but Cody says we'll do it next week. Booker says that next week it'll be a celebration when he becomes the new Intercontinental Champion. Booker leaves and Cody beats Dustin down. Booker makes the save but Cody is long gone. Not a bad opening segment.
Tonight's main event: it's a tag team match!
Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal
If DiBiase is supposed to be this everyman now, shouldn't he lose the I'm Rich theme song? They exchange quick control to start but Mahal keeps his, hitting a Vader Bomb knee drop for two. The crowd isn't exactly thrilled by DiBiase vs. Legs Mahal here. Ted gets in a few shots to slow Mahal down but tweeks his knee coming off the top. A Downward Spiral (so fed up with that move) sets up the Camel Clutch and Dibiase surprisinly taps at 2:50. Didn't see that one coming.
Teddy is talking about his New Year's Eve party tomorrow night when Aksana comes in. More flirtations are made and Drew McIntyre comes in. He's been signed back to Smackdown and Teddy is willing to forgive him. Drew isn't going to get paid what he was getting earlier when his career has fallen apart. He gets Big Zeke tonight and if he doesn't win, his job might be in jeopardy. Drew talks about the time he made Teddy beg for mercy and says that's nothing compared to what he'll do to Jackson.
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn vs. Natalya/Tamina
Tamina looks better with straight hair. The lack of JTG helps a lot also. Tamina vs. Kaitlyn starts us off. The evil ones take over on Kaitlyn and beat her down. Something like a Michinoku Driver by Natalya does nothing here as Kaitlyn makes the tag about two seconds later. Alicia hits the axe kick on Nattie for the pin at 1:34. Why do they bother with these matches? I honestly don't know.
Tamina beats up Natalya post match, including a Superfly Splash.
Don't be a bully.
Raw ReBound eats up some time.
We get a standard recap of Show vs. Otunga on Monday with Henry coming in as well. Bryan made the save.
Speaking of Bryan, he's in the back talking with AJ (who looks GREAT tonight in a black cut off top and jeans) about how he saved Big Show. Show comes up and asks to talk to Bryan alone. Show says that giants don't really need to be saved. Teddy comes in and says that the tag match main event won't be happening tonight as Otunga wants a rematch with Show. Henry will be in his corner. Bryan implies he'll have Show's back but doesn't exactly say it.
Justin Gabriel vs. Hunico
I think there's new music for Gabriel but I'm not 100% sure. Hunico comes out on a lowrider bicycle with his new bodyguard who used to be in FCW and is named Camacho here. I don't remember his FCW name. Further investigations (as in I looked it up on Wikipedia) says that his name there is Donny Marlow and his dad is more famous as Meng or Haku.
Cole says he has a lot of knowledge about lowrider bicycles. Hunico gets sent to the floor and Gabriel misses a dive. Cole gives us the history of lowrider bikes and all I can think of is....why? There's something about Eddie Munster mentioned in there. Justin misses a springboard something coming back in but hits a powerbomb style move to take over. Hunico breaks up the 450 and brings Gabriel down so that the Swanton can end this at 1:48. This was nothing and Camacho didn't get involved at all.
Hunico/Camacho hit something like Cryme Tyme's old finisher to leave Gabriel on the mat (Samoan Drop/neckbreaker combo).
Big Show vs. David Otunga
If nothing else we get the big knockout punch from last week which still looks great. Otunga has really long arms. Henry gets his own entrance. Show beats him down as Otunga tries to get in whatever offense he can. David bails to the floor where Henry gives him something resembling a pep talk. Back in a shoulder block puts Otunga down as does a corner splash. Henry gets on the apron to distract from the chokeslam and Otunga hits a chop block and DDT for two. Henry goes to get in the ring but Bryan pops up with a belt shot to stop him. The big punch knocks Otunga out cold at 3:24.
Ezekiel Jackson vs. Drew McIntyre
Jackson has some hair now. We get Drew's full entrance and I miss his song. Big Zeke controls with power for a few moments but Drew takes over pretty quickly. Jackson beats him down more and this match isn't going to last long. A big boot by Drew gets two. Northern lights suplex gets two. Jackson backdrops him and the fans don't care. Side slam gets two for the power man. Torture Rack is countered and Drew gets a boot up in the corner. It gets two even with his feet on the ropes. Drew argues with the ropes and Jackson rolls him up (with a big handful of tights) for the pin at 3:52.
Video on Sheamus. I think they aired this months ago. I remember the rock version of Written In My Face.
Drew yells about the tights in the back and Teddy says he can't stand losers. He's a ticked off Peanut here. Old school fans will get that joke.
Here's Sheamus for a little chat. “What's the crack Indianapolis?” Is that an Irish thing? He wants to talk about the future and by that he means the Royal Rumble. The winner gets a title match at Wrestlemania. He doesn't care who he eliminates because he's going to win the Rumble. Cue Hornswoggle to get on my nerves. Horny is going to enter the Rumble as well because miracles like Bryan beating Big Show can happen. He says he'll win (only saying his own name). Sheamus admires that and gives us some Irish folk lore or whatever you want to call it. He gets all mean but is only playing.
Cue Heath Slater who is a breath of air. I can't stand Horny at all. Slater mentions guys like Bushwhacker Luke and the Brooklyn Brawler, who fall into the same category as Horny: the guy that says they'll win and is a joke. Slater says he's the greatest redhead on Smackdown and the only reason Horny won the battle royal was because Sheamus didn't want to squash a leprechaun. Slater doesn't have that problem though. Sheamus gets in his face and....sings Don't Stop Believin. Ok then. Sheamus says he sees Slater as more of an R. Kelly kind of guy, because he believes he can fly, and there goes Slater. That was...yeah.
Sheamus vs. Heath Slater
Kind of awkward here as Sheamus was celebrating after throwing Slater out and we went to a break. Back and they're having a match. Sheamus pounds him down and works on the arm and then throws Heath to the apron. Slater slaps him and that was very stupid, so here are ten forearms to the chest for his efforts. Sheamus keeps countering him but Slater drop toeholds him into the middle buckle. Slater gets him onto the mat and hooks a chinlock. The counter to that triggers Sheamus' comeback which consists of forearms to the back, a top rope shoulder and the Brogue Kick for the pin at 4:45 shown.
Bryan is talking to Teddy when Show comes in. He's getting annoyed at Bryan for always being there. Bryan wants a thank you for being there to bail Show out. They start growling at each other and we're told that it's Show vs. Bryan for the title next week. Show laughs a lot at that. Bryan says even if he loses, his reign lasted longer than 45 seconds.
Whoever they are, they're still coming. I'm kind of curious about that but I'm expecting a letdown.
We hype the three big title matches spread over the next week of shows.
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett
Falls count anywhere. Slugout to start and Orton hammers him into the corner. Out to the floor and Barrett goes into the steps for two. With Barrett's head on the steps, a stomp gets two. Usually that would crack a skull but in wrestling it only gets two. That's why I love this stuff. RKO is countered and Orton goes into the post as we take a break.
Back with them in the ring and Barrett hammering away. He hits that running boot to Orton as Orton is sitting on the middle rope which gets two on the floor. Big boot in the ring gets two and we hit the chinlock. Middle rope elbow gets the same. Back to the chinlock as this has been a lot more basic than I was expecting. Orton gets in the powerslam but Barrett escapes the elevated DDT by heading to the floor.
Orton throws him over the table and they go into the crowd. They go into the back and Orton goes through a table. Randy sends him into an anvil case as Barrett tries to escape down the hall. The referee went down earlier so he's not here. They fight into an elevator and we actually cut to a security camera feed in the elevator.
They brawl out into what looks like a corporate area and a cameraman has to run to catch up to them. The camera goes through a door and we hear shouting and a crash. He catches up to them and Barrett is standing at the top of a flight of steps. Orton is laying at the bottom in a shape that probably isn't that comfortable. The camera looks down at him as he can barely move and we go off the air.
Results
Jinder Mahal b. Ted DiBiase – Camel Clutch
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn b. Natalya/Tamina – Axe Kick to Natalya
Hunico b. Justin Gabriel – Swanton Bomb
Big Show b. David Otunga – WMD
Drew McIntyre b. Ezekiel Jackson – Rollup
Sheamus b. Heath Slater – Brogue Kick
Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton went to a no contest
Saturday
Nothing.
Sunday
See also: Saturday.
Quick Results
Raw
Booker T b. Cody Rhodes – Axe Kick
Zack Ryder/Eve Torres b. Tyson Kidd/Natalya – Rough Ryder to Kidd
John Cena b. The Miz via countout
Big Show b. David Otunga via DQ when Mark Henry interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. CM Punk – Zig Zag
NXT
Justin Gabriel b. Heath Slater – Springboard 450 Splash
Tyson Kidd b. Percy Watson – Spinning Fisherman's Neckbreaker
Derrick Bateman b. Johnny Curtis – Rollup
Impact Wrestling
Kazarian/AJ Styles b. Abyss/Scott Steiner – Kazarian b. Steiner after a Black Hole Slam from Abyss
Zema Ion b. Anthony Nese – Ion grabbed the contract
Douglas Williams b. Gunner via DQ when Gunner shoved the referee
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. ODB/Eric Young – MuscleBuster to Young
Gail Kim b. Mickie James – Pin after a Rayne Drop from Madison Rayne
Smackdown
Jinder Mahal b. Ted DiBiase – Camel Clutch
Alicia Fox/Kaitlyn b. Natalya/Tamina – Axe Kick to Natalya
Hunico b. Justin Gabriel – Swanton Bomb
Big Show b. David Otunga – WMD
Drew McIntyre b. Ezekiel Jackson – Rollup
Sheamus b. Heath Slater – Brogue Kick
Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton went to a no contest