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Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Monday Night Raw
Date: October 3, 2016
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
We've got a packed show tonight with two big matches. First up Cruiserweight Champion TJ Perkins has the first title defense on Raw as he puts the title on the line against Brian Kendrick in a Clash of Champions rematch. In the bigger title match, we have Sasha Banks challenging Charlotte for the Raw Women's Title in her first one on one reamtch. Let's get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here's Roman Reigns to open the show and MY GOODNESS they're booing him out of the building. WWE is asking for this one as Reigns just isn't the kind of person who can go out there and talk full time. He goes into the guy line but here's Lana to interrupt. Fans: THANK YOU LANA! With the accent slipping, Lana rips into Reigns for everything he's done in recent weeks but Reigns just tells her to bring her husband out here if he wants that rematch.
Rusev comes out and the brawl is on again with the Bulgarian getting the better of it and knocking Reigns into the crowd. Rusev takes the belt and starts to walk up the ramp but Reigns sneaks up from behind him with a Superman Punch. Reigns grabs the mic and says they can have the rematch but it's going to be inside the Cell.
We recap Brian Kendrick vs. TJ Perkins, which is over Kendrick thinking he deserves the title more than TJ. Perkins had talked about being homeless while pursuing his dream (Sidebar: allegedly this got Perkins heat because other wrestlers have done the same thing. Uh, are any of them Cruiserweight Champion and wrestling on Raw? No? Then shut up with your jealous complaining.) but Kendrick has worked harder and longer. Perkins beat him at Clash of Champions and tonight is a rematch because....well because no one knows anyone other than these two.
TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick
Non-title (Wasn't this announced as a title match last week?) and both guys are basically the hometown boys. A dropkick puts Kendrick on the floor to start and a slingshot dropkick makes it even worse. Back in and Brian boots him in the face before putting Perkins hand inside the clamp that attaches the turnbuckle to the post.
We take a break and come back with TJ hitting his double chicken wing into the gutbuster but the kneebar sends Kendrick to the ropes. A quick Sliced Bread #2 gets two on TJ and there's the Captain's Hook but Perkins rolls Kendrick up for two. The slingshot dropkick looks to set up the fireman's carry enziguri, only to have Kendrick rake the eyes. Another Captain's Hook gives Kendrick the title at 9:00.
Earlier today, Seth Rollins sat down with Michael Cole to say he's been medically cleared. Rollins talks about gaining enemies due to being HHH's friend. He and Kevin Owens are both hard workers but HHH handed Owens the title. No one handed the title to Rollins at Wrestlemania XXXI (which we're still talking about) and Owens is going to be another piece in HHH's big plans. Rollins is going to get the title back no matter what Owens or Chris Jericho have to say about it.
Braun Strowman vs. Chase Silver
Before the match, Silver says he's in Hollywood because dreams come true here. Strowman runs him over and shouts that this is the best WWE can offer. A running shoulder sends Silver flying into the corner and the powerslam (Cole: Hi ho Silver, away) is enough for the pin at 1:45.
Post match Strowman says WWE is wasting his talents on these weak fools week in and weak out. If he doesn't get better competition next week, there might not be a next week. Good, as they need to advance this story and character at some point.
Bayley comes up to Sasha Banks and congratulates her for being in the main event of Raw. Sasha knows Charlotte is great but she's destined to be champion.
Here are Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho to respond to Rollins' comments earlier. Owens asks Jericho what he's done to deserve a rematch because the truth is that Seth lost at Clash of Champions. Rollins has been complaining about the referee but he's only got himself to blame.
After laughing at the fans for chanting STUPID IDIOTS (because it makes them stupid idiots), Owens suggests that Jericho should be the guest referee. Jericho suggests that he get a title shot of his own but of course he means the two of them getting the Raw Tag Team Titles. Owens isn't sure about it because that's a bit too much work for him so Jericho suggests a Universal Title shot. Owens: Yeah! Let's do it! Let's go after New Day!
Cue New Day to say they're the best friends in WWE. That earns them a spot on Jericho's list but Big E. cuts him off to say they'll have to have a champion's huddle. This excludes Jericho so BIG E. MAKES THE LIST. Woods laughs and you know where that lands him. Owens yells at New Day for feeding kids questionable cereal and says they jumped the shark about seven months ago. Woods: Look at yourself. When is the last time you jumped over anything? Owens: PUT WOODS ON THE LIST AGAIN! A match seems to be made for later.
Sheamus and Cesaro arrived earlier and threw each other's bags out of the car.
Sami Zayn vs. Titus O'Neil
Titus says this is the debut of the Titus Brand. Some forearms to the back have Sami in trouble and a bearhug makes it even worse. Sami comes right back with a clothesline, the exploder suplex in the corner and the Helluva Kick for the pin at 2:48.
Sheamus and Cesaro argue over whose fault it was that they were late. Mick Foley comes in and says they're doing this to become as amazing of a team as they can. The arguing continues.
Anderson and Gallows vs. Golden Truth
Oh yeah Golden Truth is still a thing. Earlier today, Anderson and Gallows blamed New Day for ruining the tag team division. Truth and Anderson start things off and it's time for dancing and gyrating. Goldust comes in for a neckbreaker but it's quickly off to Gallows with a boot to the face and a chinlock. Back up and the hot tag brings in Truth for the house cleaning, including an ax kick to Anderson. Everything breaks down and the Magic Killer puts Truth away at 3:22.
Jericho and Owens are on the way to the ring when they run into Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson. The List is discussed with Masterson reading off a few items: people who don't appreciate a good scarf and superstars who lose to Fandango at Wrestlemania. Owens goes off to get ready and the celebrities say they'll be at ringside for the match against New Day. Jericho threatens to give them........hang on as he goes off camera to the left and comes back in on the other side to say they'll get IT.
Jericho is the perfect example of why natural charisma is so much more important than writing. The stuff he's doing is so stupid but he knows how to time things so well that there's almost nothing he can't get over. If any rookie came up with this same material, odds are they would be fired. Jericho has such natural presence though that it works like little else on the show. You can't teach that and it's one of the most important things in wrestling.
Enzo Amore and Big Cass are in the ring with three breast cancer survivors for the annual Susan G. Komen segment. The three women are given replica WWE Title belts.
Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. New Day
Non-title. Masterson and Kutcher are on commentary as Owens runs Woods over to start. Owens makes sure to jump over Xavier in the kind of funny bit that most people just don't think to do. Woods gets taken into the corner for the double teaming as Kutcher talks about their new show. It's off to Big E. to face Owens for some hip swiveling.
Graves says Saxton would be the Fez (character on That 70s Show, on which Masterson and Kutcher starred) of the commentary table, which sounds like a good insult, assuming you find dating Mila Kunis' character to be a bad thing. Big E. gets beaten down even more as the announcers discuss middle names and scarves.
Back from a break with Owens and Big E. colliding off a double clothesline. Woods comes in and gets chinlocked before it's back to Jericho for a running clothesline in the corner. A superplex is broken up and Woods gets two off a high crossbody. Owens breaks up a hot tag attempt and gets two off a DDT.
Cue Seth Rollins to the stage for a distraction though and Woods gets in an enziguri. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house (and swivel the hips of course) but Owens superkicks him down. Big E. and Owens go to the floor and Jericho gets the Liontamer on Woods, only to have Rollins offer a distraction. A quick Midnight Hour puts Jericho away at 16:25.
Rollins gives Jericho a Pedigree to really get under Owens' skin.
We look back at the opening sequence.
Charlotte says she's the only reasons Sasha is in the main event and she'll rise to the occasion as she always does.
Video on Rich Swann.
Stephanie McMahon comes up to yell at Rollins because he's just as replaceable as anyone else. Rollins says getting rid of him was the second worst decision HHH has ever made. The worst: marrying Stephanie. Seth promises to burn Raw to the ground and take Owens and Jericho with him.
Rich Swann vs. Tony Nese
Nese says Swann has a dance with the best athlete in the division. Swann tries to dance early on but gets taken down with hard forearms. A bodyscissors and chinlock don't get Nese very far as Rich pops up with some dropkicks. That's about it for Swann though as Nese stun guns him into a sitout pumphandle powerslam for the pin at 4:13.
Mil Mascaras video as WWE is celebrating Hispanic Heritage Month for the second month ina row.
We see a bunch of pictures of Emma in swimsuits. Coming soon: the transformation of Emma into Emmalina. I've heard of worse.
Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Raul White/Mark Carradine
White and Cesaro start things off with Raul being sent into the corner for alternating shots to the ribs from both guys. White's partner comes in and walks into an Irish Curse. Sheamus loads up the Cloverleaf but Cesaro jumps over him for a DDT onto White. The Brogue Kick is good for the pin on at 1:55.
Long recap of Charlotte vs. Sasha, going all the way back to the BFF's days in NXT. They've both been fighting to prove themselves as the best in the world and have traded the title over the last few months.
Charlotte and Dana Brooke are on the way to the ring when they run into Bayley. Charlotte laughs at Bayley for thinking she could be in this place someday but says she has to leave so she can go main event the show. Dana laughs at Bayley too.
Raw Women's Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte
Charlotte is defending and we get Big Match Intros. Sasha kicks her outside and hits a suicide dive, setting up a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with Charlotte in control and working on the back with a backbreaker (makes sense) and a hard shove into the corner. Sasha blocks the big boot and gets two off the double knees.
The champ is sent outside but is still able to drop Sasha's back onto the apron. Sasha tries to go up top but gets knocked onto the ropes for a nasty crash. Charlotte's superplex is shoved off and double knees from the top get two. It's too early for the Bank Statement though so Charlotte sends her outside, setting up a CORKSCREW MOONSAULT TO THE FLOOR! I mean it made almost no contact but it looked awesome. Natural Selection gets two back inside and Charlotte is frustracted. A headscissors sets up the Bank Statement and Charlotte taps in a hurry to give Sasha the title at 14:17.
A long celebration ends the show.
Results
Brian Kendrick b. TJ Perkins Captain's Hook
Braun Strowman b. Chase Silver Powerslam
Sami Zayn b. Titus O'Neil Helluva Kick
Anderson and Gallows b. Golden Truth Magic Killer to R-Truth
New Day b. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho Midnight Hour to Jericho
Tony Nese b. Rich Swann Sitout pumphandle powerslam
Cesaro/Sheamus b. Raul White/Mark Carradine Brogue Kick to Carradine
Sasha Banks b. Charlotte Bank Statement
Tuesday
Erick Rowan has torn his rotator cuff and will be out until March.
Smackdown
Date: October 4, 2016
Location: Valley View Casino Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga
It's the go home show for No Mercy because this is the new WWE where there's a go home show every two weeks. Tonight is going to focus on Dean Ambrose vs. John Cena vs. AJ Styles for Styles' Smackdown World Title in Sunday's triple threat. Other than that we're likely getting more in the Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt feud. Let's get to it.
The opening video promises Styles, Cena and Ambrose face to face to face tonight.
Bray Wyatt vs. Kane
They take turns hitting each other in the face to start until Bray gets Kane down for a chinlock. A side slam and running DDT have Bray in trouble but the chokeslam is countered into a Rock Bottom. Bray does the spider walk but an upside down Randy Orton appears on the screen. This takes WAY longer than it should and the distraction lets Kane get up. Bray blocks a chokeslam but takes the countout loss at 4:15.
Baron Corbin doesn't know why Jack Swagger was signed but if Jack wants to fight, Baron will drop him where he stands. Swagger comes up and a match is set up.
Post break, Bray is looking for Orton.
Alexa Bliss vs. Nikki Bella
Carmella is on commentary as Nikki gets two off a facebuster that didn't come close to making contact. Nikki takes it outside and throws Bliss into Carmella, drawing her into the ring for the DQ at 1:52.
Post match here's Becky Lynch for the save and we might as well keep the referee out here for the obvious tag match.
Becky Lynch/Nikki Bella vs. Carmella/Alexa Bliss
Joined in progress with Alexa hammering on Nikki before it's off to Carmella for some shots to the face of her own. Carmella misses a Bronco Buster though and the hot tag brings in Becky. Everything breaks down with Nikki spearing Carmella to the floor, leaving Alexa to hit Twisted Bliss for the pin on Becky at 3:14.
Bray goes to look for Orton again and finds the rocking chair. Orton jumps him from behind and shuts a metal door, locking Bray in what looks like a small storage unit. Of course there's a camera inside with Bray freaking out over being locked inside.
Daniel Bryan brings out some breast cancer survivors for the Susan G. Komen presentation ala Enzo and Big Cass on Raw.
Vaudevillains vs. Hype Bros
There's still something weird about JBL being a Mojo Rawley fan. Mojo slams Gotch to start and it's Hammer Time! Cue Ascension, now with face paint, to the stage for a distraction but Ryder dropkicks English off the apron anyway. Ryder gets kneed in the back but Gotch's chinlock goes as far as a chinlock is going to take him. The hot tag brings in Mojo a few seconds later and a Hype Ryder ends English at 3:48.
The Ascension point at the Hype Bros.
It's time for MizTV with a special Dolphumentary. Ziggler comes out and the documentary is of course a career lowlight reel with stuff like Ziggler as Kerwin White's caddy and the Spirit Squad and various out of context statements from wrestlers. This Sunday, it's the feature film the Success of a Failure. Ziggler doesn't take kindly to this and says that he loves it when a Make-A-Wish kid says he's their hero but Ziggler gets to tell them that they're his hero. That's the kind of thing that makes Ziggler know he can't walk away.
Miz laughs this off and brings out two members of the Spirit Squad (Kenny and Mikey). We get a cheer with Miz saying Ziggler can join them at their $5 autograph signing. Ziggler goes after Miz but gets jumped from behind. Dolph easily fights them off and Miz bails from the threat of a superkick. This feud is really, really growing on me despite it being Dolph Ziggler. They're nailing every single thing about this and I want to see the match, albeit with Miz winning to finally get rid of Ziggler.
Bray is still in the storage unit and says he finally sees it.
Hispanic Heritage Month video on Roberto Clemente.
Jey Uso vs. Jason Jordan
Jey snaps Jordan's neck across the ropes to start and hammers away but a very quick rollup puts Uso away at 1:18.
The Usos send Gable into the steps and chop block Jordan for a bonus. Rhyno and Heath Slater come out to save Jordan's knee.
Bray is now singing but stops to say he missed Abigail. She's going to take him home.
Back from a break and Orton opens the door, only to find an empty chair. There wasn't a lock on the door so this isn't exactly supernatural.
Clip of John Cena on Talking Smack last week, talking about how the Draft is a fresh opportunity for him as well. Cena's big line: Dean Ambrose doesn't like John Cena. John Cena doesn't care about Dean Ambrose.
Curt Hawkins vignette. He's debuting at No Mercy.
Jack Swagger vs. Baron Corbin
Corbin shoulder blocks him down to start and rains down right hands to the head, sending us to an early break. Back with Swagger favoring his knee and getting caught in a chinlock. Jack fights up and elbows Corbin in the face, followed by the Patriot Lock. Corbin dives for the ropes over and over, which the referee calls a tap out at 8:25. Replays show that Corbin was reaching for the ropes as his hand is up and it's his wrist hitting the mat when he can't reach the ropes.
Here's AJ for the big closing segment. He talks about how he'll prove himself to be the best in the world on Sunday but Ambrose comes out to cut him off. Dean is serious this week and says he had the title won last week until Cena had to get involved. Cue Cena but AJ cuts him off and begs Cena to shut up for once in his life. AJ is incensed at the thought of Cena comparing himself to Flair (here we go) and begs Cena to give one of his rah-rah speeches.
Cena is ready to do just that when Ambrose cuts him off again, saying Cena is a part timer who is dying to get out of here on a private jet and go be with his people in New York. Dean is the man who works harder around here and has wrestled more matches than anyone else in the company the last two years because he never takes days off. He'll be over here in the corner being Dean Ambrose while Cena gets to play John Cena on TV.
That's enough for Cena and the fight is on with Cena hitting an AA on Ambrose and throwing Styles outside. John holds up the title but AJ runs in and escapes an AA attempt. The Phenomenal Forearm drops Cena but Dean gives AJ Dirty Deeds onto the ramp and holds up the title to end the show. REALLY good stuff here with Dean standing up to Cena in a way no one has done since Rock. That's the kind of thing that makes him feel like a main event star, not wearing funny hats.
Results
Kane b. Bray Wyatt via countout
Nikki Bella b. Alexa Bliss via DQ when Carmella interfered
Alexa Bliss/Carmella b. Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch Twisted Bliss to Lynch
Hype Bros b. Vaudevillains Hype Ryder to English
Jason Jordan b. Jey Uso Rollup
Jack Swagger b. Baron Corbin Patriot Lock
Wednesday
NXT
Date: October 5, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
It's time to start a tournament as we have the first round of the Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic kicking off tonight. Last year's event was a lot of fun and set up the NXT Title feud for the next several Takeovers. The finals of this year's tournament will be taking place at Takeover: Toronto in November so let's get to it.
The opening video talks about the Dusty Classic returning this year.
Opening sequence.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Bollywood Boyz vs. Authors of Pain
Harv and Gurv Shira dance a lot before the bell so Razar puts Harv on the top rope for some clubberin. Gurv comes in and gets beaten down as well, setting up the Russian legsweep and clothesline combination (now dubbed the Last Chapter) for the pin at 1:47.
Dan Matha arrives tonight.
Rich Swann vs. Patrick Clark
Clark looks like he's wearing Prince style gear. Even Swann looks confused here. Rich does some dancing punches in the corner until he gets caught in a spinebuster. The fans sing Swann's theme song and he makes a quick comeback with a running kick in the corner. A running moonsault puts Clark away at 2:58.
We look back at Cedric Alexander and Andrade Cien Almas facing off a few weeks back and joining forces in the tournament as a result.
Video of Asuka squashing Liv Morgan last week. After the match, Billie Kay and Peyton Royce laughed at Morgan's loss.
Peyton Royce vs. Danielle Kamela
Kamela starts fast with a small package and cross body for two each. Peyton sends her into the corner for some long legged choking and forearms to the chest. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Kamela fights up for handspring elbow, only to get kneed in the head. A fisherman's suplex gives Peyton the pin at 3:44.
Bobby Roode is way too fired up for the first round match in the Dusty Classic. He doesn't want to talk about Sanity when everyone is talking about Glorious Ten. It will be glorious when we're victorious. Roode rushes Dillinger out before he can say anything.
Dan Matha comes out (looking like a cross between Matt Morgan and Nathan Jones) for his debut but here's Samoa Joe to beat him down instead. Joe asks Regal how many more have to suffer like this one here.
Rich Swann and No Way Jose have teamed up due to a love of dancing.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Andrade Cien Almas/Cedric Alexander vs. Revival
Non-title. Alexander and Dawson start things off with Cedric getting shouldered down. Everything breaks down and the Revival is dropkicked out to the floor and a backdrop does it all over again. A big flip dive from Cedric takes the champs down again and it's all Alexander/Almas in the first four minutes. Revival finally gets it together by suckering Almas into a blindside forearm as we take a break.
Back with Dawson getting two off a northern lights suplex as the champs start in on Almas' arm. The fans want Cedric and an enziguri from Almas gives them what they want. Everything breaks down again and Alexander gets two off a sunset flip into a bridge. Almas has knocked out to the floor though and it's the Shatter Machine to send the Revival on at 12:40.
Post match, Almas beats Cedric down and sends him into the post. Almas soaks in the YOU SUCK chants to end the show.
Results
Authors of Pain b. Bollywood Boyz Last Chapter to Gurv
Rich Swann b. Patrick Clark Running moonsault
Peyton Royce b. Danielle Kamela Fisherman's suplex
Revival b. Cedric Alexander/Andrade Cien Almas Shatter Machine to Alexander
Monday Night Raw
Date: October 3, 2016
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton
We've got a packed show tonight with two big matches. First up Cruiserweight Champion TJ Perkins has the first title defense on Raw as he puts the title on the line against Brian Kendrick in a Clash of Champions rematch. In the bigger title match, we have Sasha Banks challenging Charlotte for the Raw Women's Title in her first one on one reamtch. Let's get to it.
Opening sequence.
Here's Roman Reigns to open the show and MY GOODNESS they're booing him out of the building. WWE is asking for this one as Reigns just isn't the kind of person who can go out there and talk full time. He goes into the guy line but here's Lana to interrupt. Fans: THANK YOU LANA! With the accent slipping, Lana rips into Reigns for everything he's done in recent weeks but Reigns just tells her to bring her husband out here if he wants that rematch.
Rusev comes out and the brawl is on again with the Bulgarian getting the better of it and knocking Reigns into the crowd. Rusev takes the belt and starts to walk up the ramp but Reigns sneaks up from behind him with a Superman Punch. Reigns grabs the mic and says they can have the rematch but it's going to be inside the Cell.
We recap Brian Kendrick vs. TJ Perkins, which is over Kendrick thinking he deserves the title more than TJ. Perkins had talked about being homeless while pursuing his dream (Sidebar: allegedly this got Perkins heat because other wrestlers have done the same thing. Uh, are any of them Cruiserweight Champion and wrestling on Raw? No? Then shut up with your jealous complaining.) but Kendrick has worked harder and longer. Perkins beat him at Clash of Champions and tonight is a rematch because....well because no one knows anyone other than these two.
TJ Perkins vs. Brian Kendrick
Non-title (Wasn't this announced as a title match last week?) and both guys are basically the hometown boys. A dropkick puts Kendrick on the floor to start and a slingshot dropkick makes it even worse. Back in and Brian boots him in the face before putting Perkins hand inside the clamp that attaches the turnbuckle to the post.
We take a break and come back with TJ hitting his double chicken wing into the gutbuster but the kneebar sends Kendrick to the ropes. A quick Sliced Bread #2 gets two on TJ and there's the Captain's Hook but Perkins rolls Kendrick up for two. The slingshot dropkick looks to set up the fireman's carry enziguri, only to have Kendrick rake the eyes. Another Captain's Hook gives Kendrick the title at 9:00.
Earlier today, Seth Rollins sat down with Michael Cole to say he's been medically cleared. Rollins talks about gaining enemies due to being HHH's friend. He and Kevin Owens are both hard workers but HHH handed Owens the title. No one handed the title to Rollins at Wrestlemania XXXI (which we're still talking about) and Owens is going to be another piece in HHH's big plans. Rollins is going to get the title back no matter what Owens or Chris Jericho have to say about it.
Braun Strowman vs. Chase Silver
Before the match, Silver says he's in Hollywood because dreams come true here. Strowman runs him over and shouts that this is the best WWE can offer. A running shoulder sends Silver flying into the corner and the powerslam (Cole: Hi ho Silver, away) is enough for the pin at 1:45.
Post match Strowman says WWE is wasting his talents on these weak fools week in and weak out. If he doesn't get better competition next week, there might not be a next week. Good, as they need to advance this story and character at some point.
Bayley comes up to Sasha Banks and congratulates her for being in the main event of Raw. Sasha knows Charlotte is great but she's destined to be champion.
Here are Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho to respond to Rollins' comments earlier. Owens asks Jericho what he's done to deserve a rematch because the truth is that Seth lost at Clash of Champions. Rollins has been complaining about the referee but he's only got himself to blame.
After laughing at the fans for chanting STUPID IDIOTS (because it makes them stupid idiots), Owens suggests that Jericho should be the guest referee. Jericho suggests that he get a title shot of his own but of course he means the two of them getting the Raw Tag Team Titles. Owens isn't sure about it because that's a bit too much work for him so Jericho suggests a Universal Title shot. Owens: Yeah! Let's do it! Let's go after New Day!
Cue New Day to say they're the best friends in WWE. That earns them a spot on Jericho's list but Big E. cuts him off to say they'll have to have a champion's huddle. This excludes Jericho so BIG E. MAKES THE LIST. Woods laughs and you know where that lands him. Owens yells at New Day for feeding kids questionable cereal and says they jumped the shark about seven months ago. Woods: Look at yourself. When is the last time you jumped over anything? Owens: PUT WOODS ON THE LIST AGAIN! A match seems to be made for later.
Sheamus and Cesaro arrived earlier and threw each other's bags out of the car.
Sami Zayn vs. Titus O'Neil
Titus says this is the debut of the Titus Brand. Some forearms to the back have Sami in trouble and a bearhug makes it even worse. Sami comes right back with a clothesline, the exploder suplex in the corner and the Helluva Kick for the pin at 2:48.
Sheamus and Cesaro argue over whose fault it was that they were late. Mick Foley comes in and says they're doing this to become as amazing of a team as they can. The arguing continues.
Anderson and Gallows vs. Golden Truth
Oh yeah Golden Truth is still a thing. Earlier today, Anderson and Gallows blamed New Day for ruining the tag team division. Truth and Anderson start things off and it's time for dancing and gyrating. Goldust comes in for a neckbreaker but it's quickly off to Gallows with a boot to the face and a chinlock. Back up and the hot tag brings in Truth for the house cleaning, including an ax kick to Anderson. Everything breaks down and the Magic Killer puts Truth away at 3:22.
Jericho and Owens are on the way to the ring when they run into Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterson. The List is discussed with Masterson reading off a few items: people who don't appreciate a good scarf and superstars who lose to Fandango at Wrestlemania. Owens goes off to get ready and the celebrities say they'll be at ringside for the match against New Day. Jericho threatens to give them........hang on as he goes off camera to the left and comes back in on the other side to say they'll get IT.
Jericho is the perfect example of why natural charisma is so much more important than writing. The stuff he's doing is so stupid but he knows how to time things so well that there's almost nothing he can't get over. If any rookie came up with this same material, odds are they would be fired. Jericho has such natural presence though that it works like little else on the show. You can't teach that and it's one of the most important things in wrestling.
Enzo Amore and Big Cass are in the ring with three breast cancer survivors for the annual Susan G. Komen segment. The three women are given replica WWE Title belts.
Chris Jericho/Kevin Owens vs. New Day
Non-title. Masterson and Kutcher are on commentary as Owens runs Woods over to start. Owens makes sure to jump over Xavier in the kind of funny bit that most people just don't think to do. Woods gets taken into the corner for the double teaming as Kutcher talks about their new show. It's off to Big E. to face Owens for some hip swiveling.
Graves says Saxton would be the Fez (character on That 70s Show, on which Masterson and Kutcher starred) of the commentary table, which sounds like a good insult, assuming you find dating Mila Kunis' character to be a bad thing. Big E. gets beaten down even more as the announcers discuss middle names and scarves.
Back from a break with Owens and Big E. colliding off a double clothesline. Woods comes in and gets chinlocked before it's back to Jericho for a running clothesline in the corner. A superplex is broken up and Woods gets two off a high crossbody. Owens breaks up a hot tag attempt and gets two off a DDT.
Cue Seth Rollins to the stage for a distraction though and Woods gets in an enziguri. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house (and swivel the hips of course) but Owens superkicks him down. Big E. and Owens go to the floor and Jericho gets the Liontamer on Woods, only to have Rollins offer a distraction. A quick Midnight Hour puts Jericho away at 16:25.
Rollins gives Jericho a Pedigree to really get under Owens' skin.
We look back at the opening sequence.
Charlotte says she's the only reasons Sasha is in the main event and she'll rise to the occasion as she always does.
Video on Rich Swann.
Stephanie McMahon comes up to yell at Rollins because he's just as replaceable as anyone else. Rollins says getting rid of him was the second worst decision HHH has ever made. The worst: marrying Stephanie. Seth promises to burn Raw to the ground and take Owens and Jericho with him.
Rich Swann vs. Tony Nese
Nese says Swann has a dance with the best athlete in the division. Swann tries to dance early on but gets taken down with hard forearms. A bodyscissors and chinlock don't get Nese very far as Rich pops up with some dropkicks. That's about it for Swann though as Nese stun guns him into a sitout pumphandle powerslam for the pin at 4:13.
Mil Mascaras video as WWE is celebrating Hispanic Heritage Month for the second month ina row.
We see a bunch of pictures of Emma in swimsuits. Coming soon: the transformation of Emma into Emmalina. I've heard of worse.
Cesaro/Sheamus vs. Raul White/Mark Carradine
White and Cesaro start things off with Raul being sent into the corner for alternating shots to the ribs from both guys. White's partner comes in and walks into an Irish Curse. Sheamus loads up the Cloverleaf but Cesaro jumps over him for a DDT onto White. The Brogue Kick is good for the pin on at 1:55.
Long recap of Charlotte vs. Sasha, going all the way back to the BFF's days in NXT. They've both been fighting to prove themselves as the best in the world and have traded the title over the last few months.
Charlotte and Dana Brooke are on the way to the ring when they run into Bayley. Charlotte laughs at Bayley for thinking she could be in this place someday but says she has to leave so she can go main event the show. Dana laughs at Bayley too.
Raw Women's Title: Sasha Banks vs. Charlotte
Charlotte is defending and we get Big Match Intros. Sasha kicks her outside and hits a suicide dive, setting up a break less than thirty seconds in. Back with Charlotte in control and working on the back with a backbreaker (makes sense) and a hard shove into the corner. Sasha blocks the big boot and gets two off the double knees.
The champ is sent outside but is still able to drop Sasha's back onto the apron. Sasha tries to go up top but gets knocked onto the ropes for a nasty crash. Charlotte's superplex is shoved off and double knees from the top get two. It's too early for the Bank Statement though so Charlotte sends her outside, setting up a CORKSCREW MOONSAULT TO THE FLOOR! I mean it made almost no contact but it looked awesome. Natural Selection gets two back inside and Charlotte is frustracted. A headscissors sets up the Bank Statement and Charlotte taps in a hurry to give Sasha the title at 14:17.
A long celebration ends the show.
Results
Brian Kendrick b. TJ Perkins Captain's Hook
Braun Strowman b. Chase Silver Powerslam
Sami Zayn b. Titus O'Neil Helluva Kick
Anderson and Gallows b. Golden Truth Magic Killer to R-Truth
New Day b. Kevin Owens/Chris Jericho Midnight Hour to Jericho
Tony Nese b. Rich Swann Sitout pumphandle powerslam
Cesaro/Sheamus b. Raul White/Mark Carradine Brogue Kick to Carradine
Sasha Banks b. Charlotte Bank Statement
Tuesday
Erick Rowan has torn his rotator cuff and will be out until March.
Smackdown
Date: October 4, 2016
Location: Valley View Casino Center, San Diego, California
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, John Bradshaw Layfield, David Otunga
It's the go home show for No Mercy because this is the new WWE where there's a go home show every two weeks. Tonight is going to focus on Dean Ambrose vs. John Cena vs. AJ Styles for Styles' Smackdown World Title in Sunday's triple threat. Other than that we're likely getting more in the Randy Orton vs. Bray Wyatt feud. Let's get to it.
The opening video promises Styles, Cena and Ambrose face to face to face tonight.
Bray Wyatt vs. Kane
They take turns hitting each other in the face to start until Bray gets Kane down for a chinlock. A side slam and running DDT have Bray in trouble but the chokeslam is countered into a Rock Bottom. Bray does the spider walk but an upside down Randy Orton appears on the screen. This takes WAY longer than it should and the distraction lets Kane get up. Bray blocks a chokeslam but takes the countout loss at 4:15.
Baron Corbin doesn't know why Jack Swagger was signed but if Jack wants to fight, Baron will drop him where he stands. Swagger comes up and a match is set up.
Post break, Bray is looking for Orton.
Alexa Bliss vs. Nikki Bella
Carmella is on commentary as Nikki gets two off a facebuster that didn't come close to making contact. Nikki takes it outside and throws Bliss into Carmella, drawing her into the ring for the DQ at 1:52.
Post match here's Becky Lynch for the save and we might as well keep the referee out here for the obvious tag match.
Becky Lynch/Nikki Bella vs. Carmella/Alexa Bliss
Joined in progress with Alexa hammering on Nikki before it's off to Carmella for some shots to the face of her own. Carmella misses a Bronco Buster though and the hot tag brings in Becky. Everything breaks down with Nikki spearing Carmella to the floor, leaving Alexa to hit Twisted Bliss for the pin on Becky at 3:14.
Bray goes to look for Orton again and finds the rocking chair. Orton jumps him from behind and shuts a metal door, locking Bray in what looks like a small storage unit. Of course there's a camera inside with Bray freaking out over being locked inside.
Daniel Bryan brings out some breast cancer survivors for the Susan G. Komen presentation ala Enzo and Big Cass on Raw.
Vaudevillains vs. Hype Bros
There's still something weird about JBL being a Mojo Rawley fan. Mojo slams Gotch to start and it's Hammer Time! Cue Ascension, now with face paint, to the stage for a distraction but Ryder dropkicks English off the apron anyway. Ryder gets kneed in the back but Gotch's chinlock goes as far as a chinlock is going to take him. The hot tag brings in Mojo a few seconds later and a Hype Ryder ends English at 3:48.
The Ascension point at the Hype Bros.
It's time for MizTV with a special Dolphumentary. Ziggler comes out and the documentary is of course a career lowlight reel with stuff like Ziggler as Kerwin White's caddy and the Spirit Squad and various out of context statements from wrestlers. This Sunday, it's the feature film the Success of a Failure. Ziggler doesn't take kindly to this and says that he loves it when a Make-A-Wish kid says he's their hero but Ziggler gets to tell them that they're his hero. That's the kind of thing that makes Ziggler know he can't walk away.
Miz laughs this off and brings out two members of the Spirit Squad (Kenny and Mikey). We get a cheer with Miz saying Ziggler can join them at their $5 autograph signing. Ziggler goes after Miz but gets jumped from behind. Dolph easily fights them off and Miz bails from the threat of a superkick. This feud is really, really growing on me despite it being Dolph Ziggler. They're nailing every single thing about this and I want to see the match, albeit with Miz winning to finally get rid of Ziggler.
Bray is still in the storage unit and says he finally sees it.
Hispanic Heritage Month video on Roberto Clemente.
Jey Uso vs. Jason Jordan
Jey snaps Jordan's neck across the ropes to start and hammers away but a very quick rollup puts Uso away at 1:18.
The Usos send Gable into the steps and chop block Jordan for a bonus. Rhyno and Heath Slater come out to save Jordan's knee.
Bray is now singing but stops to say he missed Abigail. She's going to take him home.
Back from a break and Orton opens the door, only to find an empty chair. There wasn't a lock on the door so this isn't exactly supernatural.
Clip of John Cena on Talking Smack last week, talking about how the Draft is a fresh opportunity for him as well. Cena's big line: Dean Ambrose doesn't like John Cena. John Cena doesn't care about Dean Ambrose.
Curt Hawkins vignette. He's debuting at No Mercy.
Jack Swagger vs. Baron Corbin
Corbin shoulder blocks him down to start and rains down right hands to the head, sending us to an early break. Back with Swagger favoring his knee and getting caught in a chinlock. Jack fights up and elbows Corbin in the face, followed by the Patriot Lock. Corbin dives for the ropes over and over, which the referee calls a tap out at 8:25. Replays show that Corbin was reaching for the ropes as his hand is up and it's his wrist hitting the mat when he can't reach the ropes.
Here's AJ for the big closing segment. He talks about how he'll prove himself to be the best in the world on Sunday but Ambrose comes out to cut him off. Dean is serious this week and says he had the title won last week until Cena had to get involved. Cue Cena but AJ cuts him off and begs Cena to shut up for once in his life. AJ is incensed at the thought of Cena comparing himself to Flair (here we go) and begs Cena to give one of his rah-rah speeches.
Cena is ready to do just that when Ambrose cuts him off again, saying Cena is a part timer who is dying to get out of here on a private jet and go be with his people in New York. Dean is the man who works harder around here and has wrestled more matches than anyone else in the company the last two years because he never takes days off. He'll be over here in the corner being Dean Ambrose while Cena gets to play John Cena on TV.
That's enough for Cena and the fight is on with Cena hitting an AA on Ambrose and throwing Styles outside. John holds up the title but AJ runs in and escapes an AA attempt. The Phenomenal Forearm drops Cena but Dean gives AJ Dirty Deeds onto the ramp and holds up the title to end the show. REALLY good stuff here with Dean standing up to Cena in a way no one has done since Rock. That's the kind of thing that makes him feel like a main event star, not wearing funny hats.
Results
Kane b. Bray Wyatt via countout
Nikki Bella b. Alexa Bliss via DQ when Carmella interfered
Alexa Bliss/Carmella b. Nikki Bella/Becky Lynch Twisted Bliss to Lynch
Hype Bros b. Vaudevillains Hype Ryder to English
Jason Jordan b. Jey Uso Rollup
Jack Swagger b. Baron Corbin Patriot Lock
Wednesday
NXT
Date: October 5, 2016
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves
It's time to start a tournament as we have the first round of the Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic kicking off tonight. Last year's event was a lot of fun and set up the NXT Title feud for the next several Takeovers. The finals of this year's tournament will be taking place at Takeover: Toronto in November so let's get to it.
The opening video talks about the Dusty Classic returning this year.
Opening sequence.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Bollywood Boyz vs. Authors of Pain
Harv and Gurv Shira dance a lot before the bell so Razar puts Harv on the top rope for some clubberin. Gurv comes in and gets beaten down as well, setting up the Russian legsweep and clothesline combination (now dubbed the Last Chapter) for the pin at 1:47.
Dan Matha arrives tonight.
Rich Swann vs. Patrick Clark
Clark looks like he's wearing Prince style gear. Even Swann looks confused here. Rich does some dancing punches in the corner until he gets caught in a spinebuster. The fans sing Swann's theme song and he makes a quick comeback with a running kick in the corner. A running moonsault puts Clark away at 2:58.
We look back at Cedric Alexander and Andrade Cien Almas facing off a few weeks back and joining forces in the tournament as a result.
Video of Asuka squashing Liv Morgan last week. After the match, Billie Kay and Peyton Royce laughed at Morgan's loss.
Peyton Royce vs. Danielle Kamela
Kamela starts fast with a small package and cross body for two each. Peyton sends her into the corner for some long legged choking and forearms to the chest. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Kamela fights up for handspring elbow, only to get kneed in the head. A fisherman's suplex gives Peyton the pin at 3:44.
Bobby Roode is way too fired up for the first round match in the Dusty Classic. He doesn't want to talk about Sanity when everyone is talking about Glorious Ten. It will be glorious when we're victorious. Roode rushes Dillinger out before he can say anything.
Dan Matha comes out (looking like a cross between Matt Morgan and Nathan Jones) for his debut but here's Samoa Joe to beat him down instead. Joe asks Regal how many more have to suffer like this one here.
Rich Swann and No Way Jose have teamed up due to a love of dancing.
Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic First Round: Andrade Cien Almas/Cedric Alexander vs. Revival
Non-title. Alexander and Dawson start things off with Cedric getting shouldered down. Everything breaks down and the Revival is dropkicked out to the floor and a backdrop does it all over again. A big flip dive from Cedric takes the champs down again and it's all Alexander/Almas in the first four minutes. Revival finally gets it together by suckering Almas into a blindside forearm as we take a break.
Back with Dawson getting two off a northern lights suplex as the champs start in on Almas' arm. The fans want Cedric and an enziguri from Almas gives them what they want. Everything breaks down again and Alexander gets two off a sunset flip into a bridge. Almas has knocked out to the floor though and it's the Shatter Machine to send the Revival on at 12:40.
Post match, Almas beats Cedric down and sends him into the post. Almas soaks in the YOU SUCK chants to end the show.
Results
Authors of Pain b. Bollywood Boyz Last Chapter to Gurv
Rich Swann b. Patrick Clark Running moonsault
Peyton Royce b. Danielle Kamela Fisherman's suplex
Revival b. Cedric Alexander/Andrade Cien Almas Shatter Machine to Alexander