klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Monday
Monday Night Raw
Date: January 20, 2014
Location: Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler
In case you haven't watched WWE in the last month and a half or so, Batista is making his return tonight after a nearly four year absence. It's also the go home show for the Royal Rumble which is starting to take shape. Coming out of last week the big story is Daniel Bryan turning face again, but unfortunately he suffered a concussion last week and is likely out of the show this Sunday. Let's get to it.
We open with a tribute to Martin Luther King and various other African American pioneers such as Jackie Robinson, Muhammad Ali and Barack Obama. Vince always does something for this holiday.
The Authority is in the ring to open the show and both hype up the Rumble on Sunday. HHH introduces Batista but Orton comes out instead. He wants to know who the Authority thinks they are but Stephanie asks Orton who he thinks he is. Stephanie turns this into an ad for the WWE Network before showing us footage from last week with Kofi Kingston pinning Orton, causing Randy to attack John Cena's dad at ringside.
Stephanie rips him apart for the attack and threatens to fire Orton if it happens again. Randy blames it on the Authority for making his life difficult. Orton says there wouldn't be a WWE Network without him and says he wouldn't change a thing if he could. HHH cuts him off and gives Orton a big pep talk, saying Orton can take care of Cena, Lesnar and Batista and he doesn't have to attack old men. Randy needs to be a man and fix whatever is broken inside h\im. He'll get the chance to do that tonight by facing Kofi Kingston in a rematch. After that, he gets to face Cena in this ring tonight for an apology, all alone.
Now that HHH is done making the WWE Champion look like a five year old, here's Batista's big return. Batista bows to the fans and hugs HHH before slowly looking at Randy. Orton sticks out his hand but Batista says hello instead. He understands Orton has some questions about his return. Batista is back for the World Title and to headline Wrestlemania, so deal with it. Batista looks decent though not as good as he did back when he was full time (understandable) and got a good reaction so thumbs up on the return. He seems to be a face as well.
Shield vs. Big E. Langston/Cody Rhodes/Goldust
Cody and Goldust will be defending the titles against the New Age Outlaws on the Kickoff show this Sunday. Langston runs over Ambrose to start before it's off to Goldust who cleans house on Rollins. An atomic drop and kick to the side of the head get two on Rollins and it's off to Cody for a delayed front suplex. We hit the armbar for a bit before Rollins bails to the floor, only to have Cody hit a nice dive. A standoff takes us to a break.
Back with Rollins holding Cody in a chinlock before handing it back to Rollins who pounds away in the corner. Reigns comes back in and knocks Goldust off the apron but walks into a Disaster Kick to give Cody the breather he's been needing. The hot tag brings in Langston who suplexes Ambrose in half and clotheslines Reigns to the floor.
Big E. runs Dean over but Rollins breaks up the Big Ending. An overhead belly to belly sends Dean flying and there's the Warrior Splash for two. The Superman Punch knocks the Disaster Kick out of the air and there's a spear to Goldust. Langston runs Reigns over but
gets caught by the Blackout from Rollins for the pin at 10:40.
We look at Bryan turning on Wyatt last week.
Here's Bryan to a jobber's entrance of all things to a BIG YES chant. And some people say I shouldn't be the face of this company! People have been asking if he had a plan when he joined the Wyatts. He isn't proud of what he had to do to take down Bray Wyatt, including being indoctrinated, keeping some of the people he cares about in the dark, and standing next to three men he despises. Last week he got exactly what he wanted though: to expose Bray Wyatt. On top of that, it's Bryan vs. Wyatt at the Rumble.
Cue Bryan to the screen to say that where he comes from, being a traitor is an offense punishable by death. The people cheered for him because they chose to kneel before him. Daniel needs to go home and tell his loved ones that he cares for them....and that's it. Presumably because of what will happen to him on Sunday?
Xavier Woods vs. Fandango
R-Truth is on commentary and keeps referring to Cole as Mike Stone. They slug it out for a few seconds before Fandango hits a quick suplex and the guillotine legdrop for the pin at 1:08. Was there a point to this?
Emma is in the crowd again.
Brad Maddox and Kane are in the back talking about Batista when Stephanie comes in to yell at Kane for attacking Punk. I'm getting REALLY tired of the Authority getting to look like the paragons of virtue all the time and NEVER looking bad at all. It's the basic you can't do that anymore speech and Kane has to apologize to Punk.
After a break, here's Kane for the apology. We look at Kane chokeslamming Punk on Smackdown before both guys come out. Kane angrily apologizes, even though he saved Punk from a 5-1 beatdown. Punk makes him apologize twice before jumping him and knocking Kane out to the floor. Brad Maddox comes out and makes Punk vs. Billy Gunn to let Punk get out some of his aggression.
Billy Gunn vs. CM Punk
Road Dogg is on commentary and says the Outlaws turned on Punk for the publicity which has gotten them a Tag Team Title shot. Punk sends Billy to the floor and into the apron but stops to yell at Roadie. Billy gets in a cheap shot and we take a break. Back with Punk putting on a sleeper but getting suplexed down and put in a chinlock. Billy slams Punk down and finally takes his shirt off, only to be knocked to the floor again.
Punk loads up a suicide dive but instead goes to the floor to beat up Road Dogg. The knee in the corner looks to set up Punk's bulldog but a Dogg distraction lets Billy hit a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. Punk comes right back and loads up the Macho Elbow but Dogg pulls Gunn to the floor. Not that it matters as the GTS connects for the pin on Billy a few seconds later for the pin at 8:57.
Post match Kane makes Punk #1 in the Rumble.
Lesnar and Heyman arrive.
Time for Rumble By The Numbers. I love this.
208,993lbs in the history of the Rumble, or 4 semi trucks or 492 Big Shows
25 countries that have had entrants
39 Hall of Famers
3 wins for Steve Austin, a record
9 who have won their first Rumble
25 years of age when Brock won, a record
30, which has produced the same number of winners as #1
62% of the winners in the past decade have won the world title at Wrestlemania
Rey Mysterio vs. Alberto Del Rio
Because this needed a rubber match. Feeling out process to start until Del Rio takes him down and gets two off a kick to the head. Rey comes back with a low dropkick for two of his own and a kick to the chest sends Del Rio outside. An Asai Moonsault connects but Rey might have hurt himself. Back in and Rey hits a baseball slide between Del Rio's legs, only to have Alberto come back with a stomp to the face to take over. A top rope ax handle sets up the chinlock, followed by a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two on Rey. Mysterio is sent to the floor and we take a break.
Back with Del Rio sending Rey into the corner before putting him in the Tree of Woe and going for the mask. Mysterio gets to the floor and walks up the ramp a bit to fix the mask. Rey has his back bent around the post before being sent shoulder first into the buckle. He's able to avoid a charge, sending Albeto shoulder first into the post. A flying shoulder puts Del Rio down but it hurts Rey's arm again.
Rey's seated senton and a kick to the head get two but the 619 is caught. Del Rio gets two off the low superkick as this just keeps going. The cross armbreaker is countered into the 619 followed by the top rope splash but Del Rio grabs the ropes. The armbreaker goes on for the submission from Rey at 14:52.
Post match Batista comes out and destroys Del Rio with the spinebuster and Batista Bomb.
Here's Big Show who does a pretty funny imitation of Heyman hyping up Brock. Lesnar may be a very dangerous man, but Big Show still doesn't like him. Show calls out Brock for a showdown and gets his wish. Brock comes to the ring but walks to the back instead of getting inside. Show calls Brock out again and gets Lesnar a second time.
Brock actually gets in the ring this time but is thrown to the floor. Lesnar goes on a rampage and destroys the announce table before blasting it with a chair. Heyman tries to distract show so Brock can bring in a chair but Big Show steps on it and takes it away. Lesnar and Heyman slowly leave. Not a bad segment but it's still Big Show getitng the match with Lesnar on Sunday.
AJ had a party earlier tonight to celebrate being the longest reigning Divas Champion ever. Bad News Barrett showed up and told her no one liked her, sending AJ into a fit. Tamina took some cake to the face.
Funkadactyls vs. AJ Lee/Tamina Snuka
Tamina runs over Cameron to start before it's off to AJ for a chinlock. Cameron gets a boot up in the corner and makes a tag to Naomi for some athletic but sloppy offense. Tamina comes right back with a bot to the face and brings in AJ, only to have her walk into a rollup from Naomi for the pin at 2:21.
We recap the opening segment.
Rumble by the Numbers Part 2!
753 entrants who haven't won
39 eliminations by Shawn Michaels, a record
37 eliminations by Kane, second place
11 eliminations by Kane in 2001, a record
455,107 fans that have seen the Royal Rumble over the years
62:12 that Rey Mysterio spent in the 2006 Rumble to set the record
:01 that Santino spent in the Rumble in 2009
We run down the Rumble card.
Video on Martin Luther King.
Usos vs. Wyatt Family
Harper runs over Jimmy to start before being sent to the floor for a clothesline off the apron from Jey. Rowan comes in to choke away a lot as the Wyatts take over. Back to Harper for more brawling offense before Rowan comes in to keep up the fast tags. Jimmy is shoved off the top rope and into the barricade as we take a break.
Back with Harper holding Jimmy in a headlock as Bray grabs a mic and talks about the punishment that Daniel Bryan will be experiencing. This is nothing compared to the torment that awaits him at the Rumble. Jimmy finally gets away and makes the hot tag to Jey who cleans house on the monsters. The running Umaga attack has Harper in trouble and Jimmy hits the big plancha to Rowan. Harper comes back with a Michinoku Driver for two on Jimmy as Bray is ticked off. Cue Bryan to jump Bray and kick Rowan in the head. The distraction lets Jimmy roll up Harper for the pin at 12:35.
Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston
Orton starts fast but keeps looking back at the ramp for Cena. Kofi gets in some shots of his own but Randy throws him to the floor and into the barricade to stop the comeback cold. Kingston is knocked down again and Orton does the You Can't See Me. A backslide and the SOS both get two on Orton and Cena is shown arriving at the arena at 10:59 PM. Kofi grabs Orton's leg but here's Cena in the arena, sending Orton running. Randy gets caught between both guys and Cena goes off on him for the DQ at 5:05.
Cena beats Orton into the crowd but Randy escapes an AA attempt. They fight up the steps and into a suite where Orton escapes to the street outside. Orton gets into a waiting car to escape. Cena comes back inside and goes into the arena for posing, replays and high fives to end the show. It was kind of awkward as he just walked down the steps for about three minutes with nothing significant happening.
Results
Shield b. Cody Rhodes/Goldust/Big E. Langston Blackout to Langston
Fandango b. Xavier Woods Guillotine legdrop
CM Punk b. Billy Gunn GTS
Alberto Del Rio b. Rey Mysteiro Cross armbreaker
Funkadactyls b. AJ Lee/Tamina Snuka Small package to AJ
Usos b. Wyatt Family Rollup to Harper
Randy Orton b. Kofi Kingston via DQ when John Cena interfered
Tuesday
Nothing.
Wednesday
Raw got a 3.46, up from last week.
NXT
Date: January 22, 2014
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Tensai
The main story coming out of last week is the live NXT special on February 27 which really is the closest thing to a pay per view that NXT has ever had. There are no matches announced for it yet but I can't imagine Dallas keeps the title coming out of that show. The question now is who challenges him on the special. Let's get to it.
Welcome Home.
The announcers intro the show. We've got a Championship Celebration for Bo Dallas tonight.
Adrian Neville vs. Wesley Blake
Blake is a cowboy. The fans are WAY into Neville here. They fight over a wristlock to start until Neville spins around to escape. A headlock takes Blake to the mat and it's off to an armbar as they're still in first gear. Neville puts him down again with a springboard missile dropkick followed by a loud chop in the corner. Fans: ONE MORE TIME! Blake blocks it with a kick to the ribs and is immediately the most hated man in the arena. Neville comes back with kicks to the gut and head before the Red Arrow hits for the pin at 4:14.
The BFF's brag about how awesome their lives are with Charlotte talking about riding in limos in jets. She doesn't care about Bayley either because life is vicious and you have to drop the nobodies. Charlotte is good as a heel, as if she could be anything else.
Xavier Woods vs. Alexander Rusev
Woods tries to speed things up to start but Rusev shrugs off a dropkick and hits Woods in the head with a forearm. He rains down some heavy right hands before a double stomp gets two. Xavier fights back with a kick to the ribs and a second dropkick followed by a Shining Wizard for two. Rusev hits a jumping kick to the chest of all things and the Accolade gets the submission at 2:40. Woods still does nothing for me.
Rusev keeps the hold on but Sin Cara of all people makes the save.
CJ Parker vs. Antonio Cesaro
Cesaro throws him around to start as the fans just don't care about Parker. CJ tries to speed things up but dives back first onto Cesaro's knees and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Parker fights back with some knees to the chest in the corner and a high cross body for two before loading up an airplane spin. Cesaro isn't phased for some reason and does his own Swing before the Neutralizer gets the pin at 3:34.
Post match Sami Zayn comes out on crutches and says that 2013 was the best year of his career. However he's been thinking about one match in particular (fans: MATCH OF THE YEAR!) because it's the one blemish on his record. Sami wants a rematch but Cesaro walks up the ramp and says no to his face.
Miz is in the back and calls Full Sail awesome. He's feeling saucy tonight so maybe we should have a MizTV tonight. CJ Parker comes in and wants to know why the people keep booing him. Miz says he can see why and accuses Parker of disrespecting him. Parker says Miz is leaving a toxic footprint by spewing all that toxic waste before slapping Miz in the face. Hopefully this is the start of a turn for Parker.
Natalya vs. Summer Rae
Bayley and the BFF's are seconds here and Renee Young is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Natalya taking over using some technical stuff. She can't get a backslide though but a snapmare allows her to step on a seated Rae's back, sending Summer face first into the mat.
A running seated dropkick gets two but Summer goes after the legs and puts them in a modified Indian Deathlock, only to have Natalya reverse it into a hold of her own. Summer is sent to the floor for a second before Natalya brings her back in for some hard clotheslines and forearms. Summer's spinwheel kick is caught and the Sharpshooter makes her tap at 2:54.
Colin Cassady and Enzo Amore (still in a wheelchair but complete with leopard print seat cover) say Enzo is making a full recovery with Enzo saying he'll fly. Aiden English comes in and brags about beating Cassady over and over. Cassady points out the cheating so English offers to sing. Enzo runs over Aiden's foot.
Time for Bo's celebration for being a record setting 224 day long title reign. He broke the record nearly three months ago but why not have a celebration now? Bo thanks us for such a great ovation and says we're here for an historic moment. He cherishes our cheers, especially when we say LET'S GO BO. Tonight the NXT officials are going to celebrate the longest reigning NXT Champion of all time, and that's not Rollins or Langston.
Bo, with the best over the top grin ever, accepts the honor and thanks some friends in the audience: his third cousin Charles, his sister's college roommate, and his fourth grade teacher. We get a banner raised which looks like it's computer generated. Bo celebrates his here's Adrian Neville to protest. He's here to speak for everyone when he says shut up. The fans say Bo is a wanker as Adrian says he's going to win the title.
Bo laughs by saying Adrian got a title match before by beating someone in 4:45. Dallas could easily beat Neville in less than 4:45. HHH pops up on screen and says that Bo is going to get a chance to make him a Bo-Liever. Right now, there's going to be a match with a 4:45 time limit. If Bo can't win, then Neville gets his rematch at the live show on February 27.
Bo Dallas vs. Adrian Neville
Dallas is in street clothes. Neville avoids a charge and points at the clock before hiptossing Bo down and out to the floor. Bo pulls him outside as well and we're under four minutes. Adrian gets on the apron but Dallas pulls the ring skirt to take Neville down. The referee gets to nine and more time is burned off the clock. Dallas pounds away with three minutes left and gets two off a suplex.
Some elbows rock Neville in the corner and a slam gets two with two minutes to go. Dallas wastes a lot of time by driving some shoulders into Neville, only to have Adrian come back with kicks to the thigh and a forearm. A dropkick puts Dallas down with forty five seconds on the clock. The Red Arrow is loaded up but Bo rolls outside. Neville stands on the top rope and looks at the clock. Bo comes back in with fifteen seconds left but gets backdropped to the floor as time expires at 4:45.
Bo comes back in post match and misses a charge, setting up a Red Arrow to end the show.
Results
Adrian Neville b. Wesley Blake Red Arrow
Alexander Rusev b. Xavier Woods Accolade
Antonio Cesaro b. CJ Parker Neutralizer
Natalya b. Summer Rae Sharpshooter
Adrian Neville vs. Bo Dallas went to a time limit draw
Thursday
Smackdown got a 2.11, up from last week.
Impact Wrestling
Date: January 23, 2014
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
We're back with Genesis Week Two, featuring all of the matches that we couldn't get to last week because we needed a thirty minute opening segment. Tonight we have Roode vs. Angle in a cage, Gunner vs. Storm for the briefcase, Sabin vs. Aries for the X Title and Sting vs. Magnus in a contract vs. title match, even though Sting was forbidden from challenging for the title ever again just a year ago. Let's get to it.
The opening video recaps Sting challenging Magnus from last week and the Roode vs. Angle feud.
Dixie and Spud are in the back with Dixie freaking out about Ethan not being here. Magnus comes in and shakes hands with some lawyer whose name sounded like Creed. Apparently there was a meeting with the board of directors and someone is setting up a hostile takeover of TNA.
The attorney says he can deal with the new investor, even though it seems to be something personal. Magnus says deal with it because he has a title defense. Apparently the investor wants someone in Sting's corner so Magnus wants No DQ and No Countout. The lawyer and Magnus almost get in a fight until Dixie defuses it. The editing in this made it feel really unnatural.
Here are Magnus, Spud and Ethan to the arena. Nice to see that the where's Ethan problem was settled inside of four minutes. Magnus accuses Sting of playing politics and thought he was a bigger man than that. This brings out Sting himself who accuses Magnus of backing out of deals of his own. Magnus says this is about Sting and wants to know how much he paid the new investor.
Either way, Sting has to face Magnus on his own tonight and Sting just can't beat Magnus on his own. Sting says he's watched their BFG match over and over again and is ready. The fans chant Paper Champion at Magnus so he slaps Sting, triggering a brawl. Sting is outnumbered but Samoa Joe makes the save. Naturally Joe is the man in Sting's corner tonight.
Video on Gunner vs. Storm, leading to their match for the briefcase tonight.
Spud freaks out about Joe so Dixie puts him in a match with the Samoan. Spud panics even more. Dixie after Spud leaves: Please don't get killed.
James Storm vs. Gunner
Of course it's a briefcase on a pole. The announcers emphasize that you have to get full possession of the case. Feeling out process to start with Storm skinning the cat but walking into a running clothesline to put him back down. James comes back with a kick to the head but gets caught in the corner and taken down by a fallaway slam. A suplex puts Gunner down but he counters the Last Call into a Rock Bottom.
Gunner goes up but gets taken down by a hurricanrana of all things to put both guys down again. Storm goes up and gets his hands on the case but Gunner stops him, bringing the case down. That's not full possession though so it becomes a fight for the case. A headbutt knocks Storm away and Gunner gets the case at 5:40.
Kurt Angle says if he can't beat Roode tonight, he doesn't deserve the Hall of Fame.
Earlier today, Velvet Sky got a package from Chris Sabin and we get to see her open it. The note says she needs to bring them to Impact this week. There's a teddy bear and a lead pipe, meaning Velvet isn't pleased.
X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries
Sabin is defending and Velvet is in a small cage at ringside, complete with a bag containing the gifts. Feeling out process to start until Aries grabs a quick Last Chancery. Sabin is thrown to the floor but jumps back onto the apron to crotch Aries in the corner. Aries gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a baseball slide but avoids being thrown to the floor.
He comes back with elbows to the head and a Lionsault for two. A discus forearm sets up the running dropkick in the corner but Sabin counters the brainbuster. Sabin heads to the floor and gets the bag from Velvet but it just has the bear. Aries gets in an ax handle from the apron followed by a missile dropkick. The brainbuster gives Aries the title at 5:10.
We get a strange promo from the Wolves with the camera going all over the place. Richards says you've seen their matches on Youtube so why would you make the wolves dance for their meal? They're the start of the new era and next week the investor will be revealed to the world. Cool video.
We recap Angle vs. Roode. Bobby has beaten him over and over but tonight it's in a cage and if Angle loses, he can never go into the Hall of Fame.
Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode
Roode has a new sleeveless full body vest. It's pin/submission/escape here. There's no bell after the break so we'll say this is joined in progress. Roode goes after Kurt to start but walks into a belly to belly suplex to give Angle control. He stomps Bobby down in the corner but his right hands are countered with a powerbomb into the cage. A suplex gets two for Roode and more choking ensues.
Angle grabs the legs and catapults Roode into the cage, setting up the Rolling Germans. The Angle Slam is countered and Angle is sent into the cage. A spinebuster gets a fast two for Roode but a Roode Bomb attempt is countered by Angle ramming Bobby into the cage. Now the Slam connects for two and there go the straps. Ankle lock goes on but Roode fights to his feet and takes Angle down with an enziguri.
We go old school with Roode's Northern Lariat (clothesline to the back of the head) for two. Roode goe sup but Angle makes a save and rams Roode into the cage over and over again until he falls down. Kurt is still on the ropes and goes to escape before looking back at Roode. Oh no. Angle busts out the moonsault but only hits mat in a HUGE crash. Roode crawls out the door but Angle grabs the ankle to pull him back in. Kurt is kicked away so they do the same thing again but this time Kurt puts on the ankle lock, only to have Roode whip him into the cage.
The Roode Bomb gets two and Bobby climbs the cage, so Angle runs the corner and hits the Angle Slam to put both guys down again. Kurt crawls over for a slow two before making a very slow climb to the corner. He gets a leg over but Roode pulls him back in onto the top rope. They slug it out until Roode is crotched on the top, allowing Angle to climb out for the win at 14:17, seconds before Roode makes it out the door.
Ethan gives Spud a pep talk and names him the British Dream.
Here are the Bro Mans who say they're on Team Dixie. Jesse says you only Bro once and asks the fans to tweet something right now to remember this moment. They say the word hashtag about 17 times and call out Eric Young and Joseph Park but just get the smaller one. He charges the ring and tries to fight everyone off but gets beaten down until Abyss makes the save. The monster cleans house and the champions and Zema run, leaving Eric to be grabbed by the throat but he talks Abyss out of it.
Joe is ready and wants a piece of Magnus afte Sting gets done with him.
Angle is worried about what happens if TNA loses Sting.
Rockstar Spud vs. Samoa Joe
This is exactly what you would expect with Joe not being afraid of Spud at all and hitting an early Facewash. Spud goes get in an eye rake and some kicks to the leg, only to charge into the release Rock Bottom out of the corner. The MuscleBuster and the Koquina Clutch are good for the win for Joe at 2:20.
TNA World Title: Magnus vs. Sting
No DQ and No Countout with Sting's contract (not career) on the line against Magnus' title. Joe is at ringside in Sting's corner. Magnus cranks on a headlock to start as the fans chant Paper Champion. Off to a wristlock by the Brit but Sting flips him down onto the mat and Magnus bails to the ropes. A double clothesline puts both guys down and here's Ethan to interfere but Joe blocks him on the ramp as we take a break.
Back with Sting putting on the Scorpion but Bad Influence comes out to neutralize Joe, allowing Ethan to make the save. Everyone is in the ring now so we're already at four interferences. Joe and Sting fight them off and Magnus takes the Death Drop but it's Zema and the Bro Mans for the save, getting us to seven interferences.
Bad Influence gets back into things but Angle makes a save (8), allowing Sting to superplex Magnus. A replacement referee comes out (9) and counts two but the Stinger Splash takes him out as well. There's the Scorpion but Bobby Roode (10) breaks up the hold to save a tapping Magnus. The champ gets up for a Michinoku Driver and it's Dixie bringing Earl Hebner (11 and 12) for the three count for the pin at 13:25. That one move put Sting out for about 45 seconds.
Magnus rips up Sting's contract to end the show.
Results
Gunner b. James Storm Gunner grabbed the briefcase
Austin Aries b. Chris Sabin Brainbuster
Kurt Angle b. Bobby Roode Angle escaped the cage
Samoa Joe b. Rockstar Spud Koquina Clutch
Magnus b. Sting Michinoku Driver
Monday Night Raw
Date: January 20, 2014
Location: Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler
In case you haven't watched WWE in the last month and a half or so, Batista is making his return tonight after a nearly four year absence. It's also the go home show for the Royal Rumble which is starting to take shape. Coming out of last week the big story is Daniel Bryan turning face again, but unfortunately he suffered a concussion last week and is likely out of the show this Sunday. Let's get to it.
We open with a tribute to Martin Luther King and various other African American pioneers such as Jackie Robinson, Muhammad Ali and Barack Obama. Vince always does something for this holiday.
The Authority is in the ring to open the show and both hype up the Rumble on Sunday. HHH introduces Batista but Orton comes out instead. He wants to know who the Authority thinks they are but Stephanie asks Orton who he thinks he is. Stephanie turns this into an ad for the WWE Network before showing us footage from last week with Kofi Kingston pinning Orton, causing Randy to attack John Cena's dad at ringside.
Stephanie rips him apart for the attack and threatens to fire Orton if it happens again. Randy blames it on the Authority for making his life difficult. Orton says there wouldn't be a WWE Network without him and says he wouldn't change a thing if he could. HHH cuts him off and gives Orton a big pep talk, saying Orton can take care of Cena, Lesnar and Batista and he doesn't have to attack old men. Randy needs to be a man and fix whatever is broken inside h\im. He'll get the chance to do that tonight by facing Kofi Kingston in a rematch. After that, he gets to face Cena in this ring tonight for an apology, all alone.
Now that HHH is done making the WWE Champion look like a five year old, here's Batista's big return. Batista bows to the fans and hugs HHH before slowly looking at Randy. Orton sticks out his hand but Batista says hello instead. He understands Orton has some questions about his return. Batista is back for the World Title and to headline Wrestlemania, so deal with it. Batista looks decent though not as good as he did back when he was full time (understandable) and got a good reaction so thumbs up on the return. He seems to be a face as well.
Shield vs. Big E. Langston/Cody Rhodes/Goldust
Cody and Goldust will be defending the titles against the New Age Outlaws on the Kickoff show this Sunday. Langston runs over Ambrose to start before it's off to Goldust who cleans house on Rollins. An atomic drop and kick to the side of the head get two on Rollins and it's off to Cody for a delayed front suplex. We hit the armbar for a bit before Rollins bails to the floor, only to have Cody hit a nice dive. A standoff takes us to a break.
Back with Rollins holding Cody in a chinlock before handing it back to Rollins who pounds away in the corner. Reigns comes back in and knocks Goldust off the apron but walks into a Disaster Kick to give Cody the breather he's been needing. The hot tag brings in Langston who suplexes Ambrose in half and clotheslines Reigns to the floor.
Big E. runs Dean over but Rollins breaks up the Big Ending. An overhead belly to belly sends Dean flying and there's the Warrior Splash for two. The Superman Punch knocks the Disaster Kick out of the air and there's a spear to Goldust. Langston runs Reigns over but
gets caught by the Blackout from Rollins for the pin at 10:40.
We look at Bryan turning on Wyatt last week.
Here's Bryan to a jobber's entrance of all things to a BIG YES chant. And some people say I shouldn't be the face of this company! People have been asking if he had a plan when he joined the Wyatts. He isn't proud of what he had to do to take down Bray Wyatt, including being indoctrinated, keeping some of the people he cares about in the dark, and standing next to three men he despises. Last week he got exactly what he wanted though: to expose Bray Wyatt. On top of that, it's Bryan vs. Wyatt at the Rumble.
Cue Bryan to the screen to say that where he comes from, being a traitor is an offense punishable by death. The people cheered for him because they chose to kneel before him. Daniel needs to go home and tell his loved ones that he cares for them....and that's it. Presumably because of what will happen to him on Sunday?
Xavier Woods vs. Fandango
R-Truth is on commentary and keeps referring to Cole as Mike Stone. They slug it out for a few seconds before Fandango hits a quick suplex and the guillotine legdrop for the pin at 1:08. Was there a point to this?
Emma is in the crowd again.
Brad Maddox and Kane are in the back talking about Batista when Stephanie comes in to yell at Kane for attacking Punk. I'm getting REALLY tired of the Authority getting to look like the paragons of virtue all the time and NEVER looking bad at all. It's the basic you can't do that anymore speech and Kane has to apologize to Punk.
After a break, here's Kane for the apology. We look at Kane chokeslamming Punk on Smackdown before both guys come out. Kane angrily apologizes, even though he saved Punk from a 5-1 beatdown. Punk makes him apologize twice before jumping him and knocking Kane out to the floor. Brad Maddox comes out and makes Punk vs. Billy Gunn to let Punk get out some of his aggression.
Billy Gunn vs. CM Punk
Road Dogg is on commentary and says the Outlaws turned on Punk for the publicity which has gotten them a Tag Team Title shot. Punk sends Billy to the floor and into the apron but stops to yell at Roadie. Billy gets in a cheap shot and we take a break. Back with Punk putting on a sleeper but getting suplexed down and put in a chinlock. Billy slams Punk down and finally takes his shirt off, only to be knocked to the floor again.
Punk loads up a suicide dive but instead goes to the floor to beat up Road Dogg. The knee in the corner looks to set up Punk's bulldog but a Dogg distraction lets Billy hit a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. Punk comes right back and loads up the Macho Elbow but Dogg pulls Gunn to the floor. Not that it matters as the GTS connects for the pin on Billy a few seconds later for the pin at 8:57.
Post match Kane makes Punk #1 in the Rumble.
Lesnar and Heyman arrive.
Time for Rumble By The Numbers. I love this.
208,993lbs in the history of the Rumble, or 4 semi trucks or 492 Big Shows
25 countries that have had entrants
39 Hall of Famers
3 wins for Steve Austin, a record
9 who have won their first Rumble
25 years of age when Brock won, a record
30, which has produced the same number of winners as #1
62% of the winners in the past decade have won the world title at Wrestlemania
Rey Mysterio vs. Alberto Del Rio
Because this needed a rubber match. Feeling out process to start until Del Rio takes him down and gets two off a kick to the head. Rey comes back with a low dropkick for two of his own and a kick to the chest sends Del Rio outside. An Asai Moonsault connects but Rey might have hurt himself. Back in and Rey hits a baseball slide between Del Rio's legs, only to have Alberto come back with a stomp to the face to take over. A top rope ax handle sets up the chinlock, followed by a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two on Rey. Mysterio is sent to the floor and we take a break.
Back with Del Rio sending Rey into the corner before putting him in the Tree of Woe and going for the mask. Mysterio gets to the floor and walks up the ramp a bit to fix the mask. Rey has his back bent around the post before being sent shoulder first into the buckle. He's able to avoid a charge, sending Albeto shoulder first into the post. A flying shoulder puts Del Rio down but it hurts Rey's arm again.
Rey's seated senton and a kick to the head get two but the 619 is caught. Del Rio gets two off the low superkick as this just keeps going. The cross armbreaker is countered into the 619 followed by the top rope splash but Del Rio grabs the ropes. The armbreaker goes on for the submission from Rey at 14:52.
Post match Batista comes out and destroys Del Rio with the spinebuster and Batista Bomb.
Here's Big Show who does a pretty funny imitation of Heyman hyping up Brock. Lesnar may be a very dangerous man, but Big Show still doesn't like him. Show calls out Brock for a showdown and gets his wish. Brock comes to the ring but walks to the back instead of getting inside. Show calls Brock out again and gets Lesnar a second time.
Brock actually gets in the ring this time but is thrown to the floor. Lesnar goes on a rampage and destroys the announce table before blasting it with a chair. Heyman tries to distract show so Brock can bring in a chair but Big Show steps on it and takes it away. Lesnar and Heyman slowly leave. Not a bad segment but it's still Big Show getitng the match with Lesnar on Sunday.
AJ had a party earlier tonight to celebrate being the longest reigning Divas Champion ever. Bad News Barrett showed up and told her no one liked her, sending AJ into a fit. Tamina took some cake to the face.
Funkadactyls vs. AJ Lee/Tamina Snuka
Tamina runs over Cameron to start before it's off to AJ for a chinlock. Cameron gets a boot up in the corner and makes a tag to Naomi for some athletic but sloppy offense. Tamina comes right back with a bot to the face and brings in AJ, only to have her walk into a rollup from Naomi for the pin at 2:21.
We recap the opening segment.
Rumble by the Numbers Part 2!
753 entrants who haven't won
39 eliminations by Shawn Michaels, a record
37 eliminations by Kane, second place
11 eliminations by Kane in 2001, a record
455,107 fans that have seen the Royal Rumble over the years
62:12 that Rey Mysterio spent in the 2006 Rumble to set the record
:01 that Santino spent in the Rumble in 2009
We run down the Rumble card.
Video on Martin Luther King.
Usos vs. Wyatt Family
Harper runs over Jimmy to start before being sent to the floor for a clothesline off the apron from Jey. Rowan comes in to choke away a lot as the Wyatts take over. Back to Harper for more brawling offense before Rowan comes in to keep up the fast tags. Jimmy is shoved off the top rope and into the barricade as we take a break.
Back with Harper holding Jimmy in a headlock as Bray grabs a mic and talks about the punishment that Daniel Bryan will be experiencing. This is nothing compared to the torment that awaits him at the Rumble. Jimmy finally gets away and makes the hot tag to Jey who cleans house on the monsters. The running Umaga attack has Harper in trouble and Jimmy hits the big plancha to Rowan. Harper comes back with a Michinoku Driver for two on Jimmy as Bray is ticked off. Cue Bryan to jump Bray and kick Rowan in the head. The distraction lets Jimmy roll up Harper for the pin at 12:35.
Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston
Orton starts fast but keeps looking back at the ramp for Cena. Kofi gets in some shots of his own but Randy throws him to the floor and into the barricade to stop the comeback cold. Kingston is knocked down again and Orton does the You Can't See Me. A backslide and the SOS both get two on Orton and Cena is shown arriving at the arena at 10:59 PM. Kofi grabs Orton's leg but here's Cena in the arena, sending Orton running. Randy gets caught between both guys and Cena goes off on him for the DQ at 5:05.
Cena beats Orton into the crowd but Randy escapes an AA attempt. They fight up the steps and into a suite where Orton escapes to the street outside. Orton gets into a waiting car to escape. Cena comes back inside and goes into the arena for posing, replays and high fives to end the show. It was kind of awkward as he just walked down the steps for about three minutes with nothing significant happening.
Results
Shield b. Cody Rhodes/Goldust/Big E. Langston Blackout to Langston
Fandango b. Xavier Woods Guillotine legdrop
CM Punk b. Billy Gunn GTS
Alberto Del Rio b. Rey Mysteiro Cross armbreaker
Funkadactyls b. AJ Lee/Tamina Snuka Small package to AJ
Usos b. Wyatt Family Rollup to Harper
Randy Orton b. Kofi Kingston via DQ when John Cena interfered
Tuesday
Nothing.
Wednesday
Raw got a 3.46, up from last week.
NXT
Date: January 22, 2014
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Tensai
The main story coming out of last week is the live NXT special on February 27 which really is the closest thing to a pay per view that NXT has ever had. There are no matches announced for it yet but I can't imagine Dallas keeps the title coming out of that show. The question now is who challenges him on the special. Let's get to it.
Welcome Home.
The announcers intro the show. We've got a Championship Celebration for Bo Dallas tonight.
Adrian Neville vs. Wesley Blake
Blake is a cowboy. The fans are WAY into Neville here. They fight over a wristlock to start until Neville spins around to escape. A headlock takes Blake to the mat and it's off to an armbar as they're still in first gear. Neville puts him down again with a springboard missile dropkick followed by a loud chop in the corner. Fans: ONE MORE TIME! Blake blocks it with a kick to the ribs and is immediately the most hated man in the arena. Neville comes back with kicks to the gut and head before the Red Arrow hits for the pin at 4:14.
The BFF's brag about how awesome their lives are with Charlotte talking about riding in limos in jets. She doesn't care about Bayley either because life is vicious and you have to drop the nobodies. Charlotte is good as a heel, as if she could be anything else.
Xavier Woods vs. Alexander Rusev
Woods tries to speed things up to start but Rusev shrugs off a dropkick and hits Woods in the head with a forearm. He rains down some heavy right hands before a double stomp gets two. Xavier fights back with a kick to the ribs and a second dropkick followed by a Shining Wizard for two. Rusev hits a jumping kick to the chest of all things and the Accolade gets the submission at 2:40. Woods still does nothing for me.
Rusev keeps the hold on but Sin Cara of all people makes the save.
CJ Parker vs. Antonio Cesaro
Cesaro throws him around to start as the fans just don't care about Parker. CJ tries to speed things up but dives back first onto Cesaro's knees and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Parker fights back with some knees to the chest in the corner and a high cross body for two before loading up an airplane spin. Cesaro isn't phased for some reason and does his own Swing before the Neutralizer gets the pin at 3:34.
Post match Sami Zayn comes out on crutches and says that 2013 was the best year of his career. However he's been thinking about one match in particular (fans: MATCH OF THE YEAR!) because it's the one blemish on his record. Sami wants a rematch but Cesaro walks up the ramp and says no to his face.
Miz is in the back and calls Full Sail awesome. He's feeling saucy tonight so maybe we should have a MizTV tonight. CJ Parker comes in and wants to know why the people keep booing him. Miz says he can see why and accuses Parker of disrespecting him. Parker says Miz is leaving a toxic footprint by spewing all that toxic waste before slapping Miz in the face. Hopefully this is the start of a turn for Parker.
Natalya vs. Summer Rae
Bayley and the BFF's are seconds here and Renee Young is on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Natalya taking over using some technical stuff. She can't get a backslide though but a snapmare allows her to step on a seated Rae's back, sending Summer face first into the mat.
A running seated dropkick gets two but Summer goes after the legs and puts them in a modified Indian Deathlock, only to have Natalya reverse it into a hold of her own. Summer is sent to the floor for a second before Natalya brings her back in for some hard clotheslines and forearms. Summer's spinwheel kick is caught and the Sharpshooter makes her tap at 2:54.
Colin Cassady and Enzo Amore (still in a wheelchair but complete with leopard print seat cover) say Enzo is making a full recovery with Enzo saying he'll fly. Aiden English comes in and brags about beating Cassady over and over. Cassady points out the cheating so English offers to sing. Enzo runs over Aiden's foot.
Time for Bo's celebration for being a record setting 224 day long title reign. He broke the record nearly three months ago but why not have a celebration now? Bo thanks us for such a great ovation and says we're here for an historic moment. He cherishes our cheers, especially when we say LET'S GO BO. Tonight the NXT officials are going to celebrate the longest reigning NXT Champion of all time, and that's not Rollins or Langston.
Bo, with the best over the top grin ever, accepts the honor and thanks some friends in the audience: his third cousin Charles, his sister's college roommate, and his fourth grade teacher. We get a banner raised which looks like it's computer generated. Bo celebrates his here's Adrian Neville to protest. He's here to speak for everyone when he says shut up. The fans say Bo is a wanker as Adrian says he's going to win the title.
Bo laughs by saying Adrian got a title match before by beating someone in 4:45. Dallas could easily beat Neville in less than 4:45. HHH pops up on screen and says that Bo is going to get a chance to make him a Bo-Liever. Right now, there's going to be a match with a 4:45 time limit. If Bo can't win, then Neville gets his rematch at the live show on February 27.
Bo Dallas vs. Adrian Neville
Dallas is in street clothes. Neville avoids a charge and points at the clock before hiptossing Bo down and out to the floor. Bo pulls him outside as well and we're under four minutes. Adrian gets on the apron but Dallas pulls the ring skirt to take Neville down. The referee gets to nine and more time is burned off the clock. Dallas pounds away with three minutes left and gets two off a suplex.
Some elbows rock Neville in the corner and a slam gets two with two minutes to go. Dallas wastes a lot of time by driving some shoulders into Neville, only to have Adrian come back with kicks to the thigh and a forearm. A dropkick puts Dallas down with forty five seconds on the clock. The Red Arrow is loaded up but Bo rolls outside. Neville stands on the top rope and looks at the clock. Bo comes back in with fifteen seconds left but gets backdropped to the floor as time expires at 4:45.
Bo comes back in post match and misses a charge, setting up a Red Arrow to end the show.
Results
Adrian Neville b. Wesley Blake Red Arrow
Alexander Rusev b. Xavier Woods Accolade
Antonio Cesaro b. CJ Parker Neutralizer
Natalya b. Summer Rae Sharpshooter
Adrian Neville vs. Bo Dallas went to a time limit draw
Thursday
Smackdown got a 2.11, up from last week.
Impact Wrestling
Date: January 23, 2014
Location: Von Braun Center, Huntsville, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz
We're back with Genesis Week Two, featuring all of the matches that we couldn't get to last week because we needed a thirty minute opening segment. Tonight we have Roode vs. Angle in a cage, Gunner vs. Storm for the briefcase, Sabin vs. Aries for the X Title and Sting vs. Magnus in a contract vs. title match, even though Sting was forbidden from challenging for the title ever again just a year ago. Let's get to it.
The opening video recaps Sting challenging Magnus from last week and the Roode vs. Angle feud.
Dixie and Spud are in the back with Dixie freaking out about Ethan not being here. Magnus comes in and shakes hands with some lawyer whose name sounded like Creed. Apparently there was a meeting with the board of directors and someone is setting up a hostile takeover of TNA.
The attorney says he can deal with the new investor, even though it seems to be something personal. Magnus says deal with it because he has a title defense. Apparently the investor wants someone in Sting's corner so Magnus wants No DQ and No Countout. The lawyer and Magnus almost get in a fight until Dixie defuses it. The editing in this made it feel really unnatural.
Here are Magnus, Spud and Ethan to the arena. Nice to see that the where's Ethan problem was settled inside of four minutes. Magnus accuses Sting of playing politics and thought he was a bigger man than that. This brings out Sting himself who accuses Magnus of backing out of deals of his own. Magnus says this is about Sting and wants to know how much he paid the new investor.
Either way, Sting has to face Magnus on his own tonight and Sting just can't beat Magnus on his own. Sting says he's watched their BFG match over and over again and is ready. The fans chant Paper Champion at Magnus so he slaps Sting, triggering a brawl. Sting is outnumbered but Samoa Joe makes the save. Naturally Joe is the man in Sting's corner tonight.
Video on Gunner vs. Storm, leading to their match for the briefcase tonight.
Spud freaks out about Joe so Dixie puts him in a match with the Samoan. Spud panics even more. Dixie after Spud leaves: Please don't get killed.
James Storm vs. Gunner
Of course it's a briefcase on a pole. The announcers emphasize that you have to get full possession of the case. Feeling out process to start with Storm skinning the cat but walking into a running clothesline to put him back down. James comes back with a kick to the head but gets caught in the corner and taken down by a fallaway slam. A suplex puts Gunner down but he counters the Last Call into a Rock Bottom.
Gunner goes up but gets taken down by a hurricanrana of all things to put both guys down again. Storm goes up and gets his hands on the case but Gunner stops him, bringing the case down. That's not full possession though so it becomes a fight for the case. A headbutt knocks Storm away and Gunner gets the case at 5:40.
Kurt Angle says if he can't beat Roode tonight, he doesn't deserve the Hall of Fame.
Earlier today, Velvet Sky got a package from Chris Sabin and we get to see her open it. The note says she needs to bring them to Impact this week. There's a teddy bear and a lead pipe, meaning Velvet isn't pleased.
X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries
Sabin is defending and Velvet is in a small cage at ringside, complete with a bag containing the gifts. Feeling out process to start until Aries grabs a quick Last Chancery. Sabin is thrown to the floor but jumps back onto the apron to crotch Aries in the corner. Aries gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a baseball slide but avoids being thrown to the floor.
He comes back with elbows to the head and a Lionsault for two. A discus forearm sets up the running dropkick in the corner but Sabin counters the brainbuster. Sabin heads to the floor and gets the bag from Velvet but it just has the bear. Aries gets in an ax handle from the apron followed by a missile dropkick. The brainbuster gives Aries the title at 5:10.
We get a strange promo from the Wolves with the camera going all over the place. Richards says you've seen their matches on Youtube so why would you make the wolves dance for their meal? They're the start of the new era and next week the investor will be revealed to the world. Cool video.
We recap Angle vs. Roode. Bobby has beaten him over and over but tonight it's in a cage and if Angle loses, he can never go into the Hall of Fame.
Kurt Angle vs. Bobby Roode
Roode has a new sleeveless full body vest. It's pin/submission/escape here. There's no bell after the break so we'll say this is joined in progress. Roode goes after Kurt to start but walks into a belly to belly suplex to give Angle control. He stomps Bobby down in the corner but his right hands are countered with a powerbomb into the cage. A suplex gets two for Roode and more choking ensues.
Angle grabs the legs and catapults Roode into the cage, setting up the Rolling Germans. The Angle Slam is countered and Angle is sent into the cage. A spinebuster gets a fast two for Roode but a Roode Bomb attempt is countered by Angle ramming Bobby into the cage. Now the Slam connects for two and there go the straps. Ankle lock goes on but Roode fights to his feet and takes Angle down with an enziguri.
We go old school with Roode's Northern Lariat (clothesline to the back of the head) for two. Roode goe sup but Angle makes a save and rams Roode into the cage over and over again until he falls down. Kurt is still on the ropes and goes to escape before looking back at Roode. Oh no. Angle busts out the moonsault but only hits mat in a HUGE crash. Roode crawls out the door but Angle grabs the ankle to pull him back in. Kurt is kicked away so they do the same thing again but this time Kurt puts on the ankle lock, only to have Roode whip him into the cage.
The Roode Bomb gets two and Bobby climbs the cage, so Angle runs the corner and hits the Angle Slam to put both guys down again. Kurt crawls over for a slow two before making a very slow climb to the corner. He gets a leg over but Roode pulls him back in onto the top rope. They slug it out until Roode is crotched on the top, allowing Angle to climb out for the win at 14:17, seconds before Roode makes it out the door.
Ethan gives Spud a pep talk and names him the British Dream.
Here are the Bro Mans who say they're on Team Dixie. Jesse says you only Bro once and asks the fans to tweet something right now to remember this moment. They say the word hashtag about 17 times and call out Eric Young and Joseph Park but just get the smaller one. He charges the ring and tries to fight everyone off but gets beaten down until Abyss makes the save. The monster cleans house and the champions and Zema run, leaving Eric to be grabbed by the throat but he talks Abyss out of it.
Joe is ready and wants a piece of Magnus afte Sting gets done with him.
Angle is worried about what happens if TNA loses Sting.
Rockstar Spud vs. Samoa Joe
This is exactly what you would expect with Joe not being afraid of Spud at all and hitting an early Facewash. Spud goes get in an eye rake and some kicks to the leg, only to charge into the release Rock Bottom out of the corner. The MuscleBuster and the Koquina Clutch are good for the win for Joe at 2:20.
TNA World Title: Magnus vs. Sting
No DQ and No Countout with Sting's contract (not career) on the line against Magnus' title. Joe is at ringside in Sting's corner. Magnus cranks on a headlock to start as the fans chant Paper Champion. Off to a wristlock by the Brit but Sting flips him down onto the mat and Magnus bails to the ropes. A double clothesline puts both guys down and here's Ethan to interfere but Joe blocks him on the ramp as we take a break.
Back with Sting putting on the Scorpion but Bad Influence comes out to neutralize Joe, allowing Ethan to make the save. Everyone is in the ring now so we're already at four interferences. Joe and Sting fight them off and Magnus takes the Death Drop but it's Zema and the Bro Mans for the save, getting us to seven interferences.
Bad Influence gets back into things but Angle makes a save (8), allowing Sting to superplex Magnus. A replacement referee comes out (9) and counts two but the Stinger Splash takes him out as well. There's the Scorpion but Bobby Roode (10) breaks up the hold to save a tapping Magnus. The champ gets up for a Michinoku Driver and it's Dixie bringing Earl Hebner (11 and 12) for the three count for the pin at 13:25. That one move put Sting out for about 45 seconds.
Magnus rips up Sting's contract to end the show.
Results
Gunner b. James Storm Gunner grabbed the briefcase
Austin Aries b. Chris Sabin Brainbuster
Kurt Angle b. Bobby Roode Angle escaped the cage
Samoa Joe b. Rockstar Spud Koquina Clutch
Magnus b. Sting Michinoku Driver