Ryan's Stalker Thread

[Planty]

So yeah, the last one has been taken care of, as some people know.

But my ex (that tells me every day she regrets finishing me... wish I never went out with her) won't shut up now! She's been trying to lure me to Liverpool for the past year etc.

Proof of being a stalker:
A year after we met she txted me every 15 minutes of the day saying what we would have been upto a year ago at each point.

Here's the scary thing:
She's saying she may cancel her 17th birthday party JUST to see my band and to get up on stage so we can wish her happy birthday :|. Being deadly serious she is and all, cause she's gone and bought a ticket off ticketline.

Why do I attract scary girls?!

 

[Dave]

Tell her to fuck off, you crazy bitch... If you want that is.

 

[Kanye South]

Is she hot?

 

[Planty]

She's not hot at all. At the time she was thinner, now she's rather large and has the worst accent imaginable.

Weighty and scary. Not tolerable.

I mean if she was hot, and scary... then we'd be talking about TNA's Daffney and that would be just fine.

Sadly, we're talking about a plus size psycho.

 

[Kanye South]

Not all fat girls are ugly, but I take it this one is. So my suggestion: either tell her you don't like her, or find her a man.

 

[Planty]

Oh, and before her phone broke I'd get txts telling me how much she loved me, every two weeks. My parents would laugh at me constantly for this.

Ugh, scary girls...

JKO, she already has a man. ALL THESE GIRLS HAVE BOYFRIENDS BUT THEY'RE OBVIOUSLY NOT SATISFIED ENOUGH :|

Lol. I think I'm just going to tell this one to fuck off etc, I really don't care about this one's feelings. Harsh, but ever so true seen as she's freaked me to wit's end.

 

[Kanye South]

Not all fat girls are ugly, but I take it this one is. So my suggestion: either tell her you don't like her, or find her a man.

.

 

[Dave]

Tell her to fuck off, you crazy bitch... If you want that is.

Still...

 

[Kanye South]

Text to her in large letters:

I DO NOT FUCKING LOVE YOU!!!

QUIT STALKING ME OR I WILL CARL WINSLOW YOUR ASS!!!!

 

[Planty]

Yeah, I guess that's all I can do, simply tell her to fuck off.

You see, the reason why I post all this is I still can't bring myself to do that as I'm a nice guy at the end of the day. But I guess you can't be a Ned Flanders constantly in your life. I'll copy and paste the conversation whenever she's next online.

 

[Kanye South]

I just gave Planty that 4th bright green bar. For being a man and telling her to fuck off.

 

[Dave]

I could add a fifth... If I so choose.

 

[Cena's Little Helper]

Aren't you the one with the girl that wanted his johnson? Did you do it to it?