Remorse For Stupidity?

[TheOneBigWill]

First and foremost it should be pointed out I could simply be heartless and hold a personal issue toward the overall situation.

A couple days ago, a male around the age of 47 years of age died. While its currently not been "officially" revealed as to what killed him, several friends of mine are making suggestions that he was at a Party and drank too much - fell asleep - and choked to death on his own vomit.

I have little to no remorse, sympathy, or heart.. for alcoholics. I've said it numerous times I do not mind if people drink, its their lives. However, I shouldn't be asked to show support in these actions. Nor should I be asked to show a heart, when the result turns fatal.

The situation at hand, the question I'm asking, is this..

Is it wrong to NOT show or give sympathy and remorse for an individual roughly 20-25+ years older than the crowd he was Partying with, who didn't understand his own limits and drank so much that it caused him to pass out and ultimately die?

Now, I'm not saying its not okay to show concern or care for a fallen friend. Thats different. I'm asking, is it wrong to not give sympathy over WHY he died?

Its like being upset that a cigarette smoker dies of lung cancer, or a drug addict dies from an overdose. They know the risks that can happen in doing the things they've done.

 

[Little Jerry Lawler]

Not everybody has the same levels of morality or sympathy. What could feel sympathetic to one may not be sympathetic to another person. I don't feel sympathy for people who drink too much and die as a result. Maybe a person who is having personal issues and feels that they need a way out could be an excuse but I don't buy it. There are always people around to talk to if you need it and you will always have that option. You know the risks involved when consuming too much alcohol or smoking too much cigarettes and yet you continue to do it. That's when I have no sympathy for you. It may be wrong to other people but those other people are not me.

I guess it can relate to sex and pregnancy. You have all these teen girls saying how much they love their man and wants to spend the rest of their lives with them. Then they get pregnant at 16 or 17 and can't handle it. I don't feel any sympathy for them because they chose to get pregnant when they were not ready. They knew what could happen and decide to do it anyway.

There are a lot of stupid and ignorant people in this world and we can't change that overnight but with education and lecturing, hopefully we can.

 

[The Roid Rage]

Honestly, it really only matters in any way if it was someone close to you. Otherwise, as it is for you, it does not matter, it does not effect you, and you are in no way, shape, or form responsible to anyone to feel any certain way for a guy you either hardly knew or didn't know at all who fucked themselves up.

Call me a heartless son of a bitch but that is of no concern to me if I'm in your position. Sure, it's never a good thing when someone is so stupid that they do this to themselves, but it does not mean you have to feel sorry for them. The part that is unfortunate is that this person was apparently so lonely, or so pathetic that he was trying to be cool with kids half his age and died as a result.

That is something to obviously observe and maybe learn from, you don't want to be that guy do you? Remember him, and remember his foolishness. Maybe one day that memory will compel you to reach out to someone trying to party too hard, and you'll be able to tell them "Look, I've seen where this leads" and maybe you can use this experience to benefit someone else. If you can than that person did not die in vain.

If you were talking about a brother, a sister, mother, father, close friend or other relative I might say you are closed off from your emotions. However just because something bad happens to someone you could be a loose acquaintance doesn't mean you have to feel so bad about it. When someone brings about their own demise by behaving carelessly and abusing their body, that is just cause and effect. We can't change it, someone could have, but no one did. Obviously no one cared enough about this man to intervene which is the real sad part, but these things happen. I have had plenty of friends and acquaintances die from excessive doses of pills, meth, alcohol, cocaine, and ecstasy. People make bad decisions and pay the price, that's life.

Just be true to your own emotions, don't try to feel what others say you should feel. Follow your own emotional compass and your answer will find you.

 

[Ferbian]

Honestly, it really only matters in any way if it was someone close to you. Otherwise, as it is for you, it does not matter, it does not effect you, and you are in no way, shape, or form responsible to anyone to feel any certain way for a guy you either hardly knew or didn't know at all who fucked themselves up.

I completely agree with you Game Rage.

I don't see the need to feel remorse for what is ultimately the choice you make in life, be it a drug addict who's struggling to survive, get by etc. be it a drunk who died (in this case) be it a cancer infected smoker.
Although in smokings case we can feel remorse and sympathy for the guy's who get infected with lung cancer because of being affected by outside chemicals, that being the thing that they can't control whether they get affected, and then again you could argue "Oh but why would he even be around smokers then?" that's also a matter of discussion because he could have been around friends who smoked (yes that grants a choice) or he could've been living in a house of two parents that chose the life of smoking and struggle to quit, the kid is affected by the environment that he travels in, the environment of friends is something you can choose to live without, while parents, are your parents.

I personally don't feel much remorse towards self caused deaths, be it drugs, alcohol etc. unless as Game Rage mentioned, you're affected by it in your every day, because it's your mother, father etc. who died cause of an addiction to some kind of material that ultimately will bring more pain to your body than good.

 

[Whistler 619]

Nope, cause I'm with you, your choice, you go into it knowing what can happen, to bad I guess.

I drink, I get drunk and all that, and I know that all it takes is for my friends not to notice something and I go to sleep and choke or something else, but this is like people who decide to drive there Truck across a frozen lake and end up in the fucking lake, if you're going to be stupid enough to do that, then to bad so sad, and same for drinking, now like I said, I'm a drinker, but I wouldn't feel bad if someone died because of it.

 

[Sparky]

Now day's you can get cancer from everything. Would you have remorse for a loved one if they got Sun cancer from a day at the beach? After all it is her/his fault they should of but Sunscreen on. There is no difference, Some people smoke because they can't stop. Others don't choose to be overweight, and spend their whole life trying lose it, Is it their fault if they have a heart attack?

In your situation I beliave its different, If you going to be stupid and drink so much that you can't sit up to vomit then I have no sympathy for you, But everything else then It's different.

 

[Richard]

No, you shouldn't feel bad for feeling the way you do. His lifestyle is probably the cause of his demise so it's not that shocking in the end is it? You have to be pretty stupid to not know the possible causes from drinking and doing drugs. He died doing what he loved, don't be sad.

Another example of something I don't feel sad about is that a few weeks or so ago, an Australian woman who after having two liver transplants died from years of heroin abuse. She wrecked her first liver from heroin abuse, after getting the first liver transplant she done the same thing and took a loan from the government of a quarter million dollars to get a second transplant and died because she did not give up heroin. In those cases, I don't feel bad for the person who died, they had numerous chances to get their shit sorted out but I feel bad for whoever has to pay for that liver which got wasted and could have saved someone else.

 

[People's Champ]

No.

The fact is people make stupid choices in life all the time. Do you feel sorry for someone who keeps getting bit by a dog because they keep petting him even tho it says beware of dog? No you say, or at least I do, what an idiot, that's what he gets.

Now because someones dies from doing something stupid I should feel sorry for them? No. In the case of someone who drank himself to death, your body let's you know when enough is enough. You should be smart enough to know your own limits. The fact that you don't is not my problem. As is with anone who does drugs, smokes, or any other stupid act that causes them to injure themselves or worse. Is it cruel? Maybe. But that's life.

 

[Jack-Hammer]

As with most things in life, there's no clear cut right or wrong answer to this. People do sometimes make foolish choices in life, or at least choices that seem foolish to us.

Is it possible that this 47 year old man was an alcoholic? It's possible, but I don't know that for sure. Maybe he's someone that got caught up in the atmosphere of the party and didn't pay enough mind to his limitations. If he was an alcoholic, that's not an automatic sign that he was a bad person. If he suffered from alcoholism, maybe there was a reason for it. For some, they just have a genetic predisposition to abuse alcohol, for some it's a coping mechanism. It's not a healthy one, but it's one that's readily available. Also, partying with a much younger crowd also isn't a sign that he was a bad person. Maybe he really simply did not know his own limits and made an irresponsible choice.

Say someone jumps into their car intending to head to the store little more than a mile from their home. Say that they just don't buckle their seatbelt but are in an accident that winds up killing them due to not wearing a seatbelt. Does that mean this person is undeserving of sympathy just because he or she made an irresponsible choice?

Anyone can make a mistake, even the most sensible of people, and these mistakes can sometimes have tragic consequences.