Racist Teacher?

[Y 2 Jake]

The other day my daugher informed me that one of the lads at her school had called her funny looking. I felt this was wrong, and needed to be addressed. My ex was Japanese, and I'm white, so yeah my daughter does look different to all the other kids. I had no real problem with the lad who said that. He's 5 and he doesn't know better. I just felt it was appropriate that the school, and his parents were informed. It upest my girl, and I didn't want it to happen again. So on Wesdnesday we all got together after school. It was no big deal. The parents agreed that they would try to explain that what he said was wrong. All was fine. Then a teacher made a comment. Something along the lines of ''She is funny looking, especially to young children'' Now maybe this was some sort of faux pas. But it was still wrong. Even if that is what the teacher thought. She's not ''funny looking'' she's different looking. She's mixed race. Is a half black/half white child funny looking? No. And I doubt that anybody would say they were anyway. Probably because they are more common, and maybe because the skin colour is evidently different. Unlike my daugheter who's still white, yet has slight Japanese characteristics. Needless to say, I hit the roof.

I'm thinking about making a formal complaint. Is that over the top, or does it need to be done?

 

[Uncle Sam]

If she did say, "She is funny looking, especially to young children", I'd have hit the roof too. That's how much everything associated to you means to me, Jake. I mean, that's not even a race thing, well, it is, but even if your child was full white saying that she's funny looking in any sort of context is out of order. I'm gonna say leave the formal complaint for now, as it could have been the teacher saying that accidentally and meaning something else - I've done it plenty of times. Fortunately, I'm not a school teacher who deals with worried parents.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

It was certainly a race thing. This was towards the end of the meeting. After I had established what race her mother was. The ''funny looking'' aspect of my daughter would be the eyes. Predominantly a Japanese characteristic. She could deny it. But other than the eys she's very normal looking.

 

[John87]

if it was a racial thing it certainly needs to be done. teachers are at school to teach and not to tell a child that they look funny because of their race. she aint gettin a check to insult kids shes gettin a check for teaching the kids something they dont know. teachers are idiots these days and dont know shit from a shingle (pardon my language) its just really ridiculous these days. especially some of the teachers where i live and went to school. heres a true story about a good teacher though, the high school that i attended had come to terms with the release of a teacher and told her she was being too nice to her students. overtime a strong argument and hate developed between the parties and do you know what she did? she gave the students in all of her classes a final grade of a straight 100% in all work, tests, and the finals for the rest of that year. sorry about losing the topic but yeah, file that complaint these teachers these days need to be taught a lesson of their own.

 

[Danmen001]

if it was a racial thing it certainly needs to be done. teachers are at school to teach and not to tell a child that they look funny because of their race. she aint gettin a check to insult kids shes gettin a check for teaching the kids something they dont know. teachers are idiots these days and dont know shit from a shingle (pardon my language) its just really ridiculous these days. especially some of the teachers where i live and went to school. heres a true story about a good teacher though, the high school that i attended had come to terms with the release of a teacher and told her she was being too nice to her students. overtime a strong argument and hate developed between the parties and do you know what she did? she gave the students in all of her classes a final grade of a straight 100% in all work, tests, and the finals for the rest of that year. sorry about losing the topic but yeah, file that complaint these teachers these days need to be taught a lesson of their own.

I'm sorry but I found that extremely disrespectful, and I am not even a teacher. However I am a student and I don't know what you are thinking or feeling at the time. Teachers do a great job generally. Teachers do their best and try to work well with everybody. You say they are getting paid to teach, but they don't get paid alot adding to this said stress. I am saying this particularly because I don't think Jake should file a complaint.

Why you shouldn't file a complaint : Looking at the context I ddon't think she ment it in the way that you are thinking Jake. She said ''She is funny looking, especially to young children'', now what I believe she ment by this was. She is different, to some children different is 'funny', now while I may not know the exact full details, I am telling you the teacher in no way wanted to say your daughter is 'funny'. What I think the teacher was getting at is different is funny to kids. Unfortunately the teacher used to wrong choice of words when saying what he was thinking IMO. Well for all purposes I would let it slide, the teacher doesn't seem bad and if anything it was just a simple word slip.

Don't file the complaint.

 

[Slyfox696]

Yeah, I think you're blowing it way out of proportion. With all due respect, I don't even know you child,but she probably IS funny looking to other kids. Now, to you and I, that means different looking, but to 5 year olds, she probably is funny looking. I seriously doubt that there are two many children in your daughter's school with Japanese characteristics, and Japanese eyes are certainly a unique characteristic.

Now, I don't know what her meaning was, but she is right. Your child IS funny looking, to other students who have never had contact with someone that looks like her. There's a difference between the way you described your child and a child who's half black/half white. Because the mixed child still has characteristics that are the same as everyone else, the skin is just different. However, from what you say, your child characteristically different, WHILE being skin colored the same. So, if the skin color is the same, but the facial characteristics are different, then your child falls outside the norm, which to a 5 year old child is funny looking.

Like I said, I was not there, but I imagine that the teacher was trying to give you some insight on how the child is viewed by other children, not trying to insult your child. Maybe she could have worded it better, but i think if it were me in that place, that is what I would have been trying to be doing. Because, this isn't going to go away for your child. Anytime she meets someone who is unaccustomed to her looks, people are going to think she looks "funny". All the teacher was trying to do, in my opinion, was trying to get you to understand that what the other child said was not out of line with the common thinking of anyone with the same experience, and to kind of smooth the way over if/when it were to happen again. Because, it very well could happen again.


At least, that's how I read it.

 

[danaconda]

While I don't think that a formal complaint is the proper thing to do right now. I do think you should go above her head and let them know your displeasure about how the situation was handled especially if your daughter was in the room at the time. I think the teacher just chose the wrong words, but at your daughters age, that can leave a lasting impression.

 

[klunderbunker]

I think I'd file it if anything close to this comes up again. I agree that she'd be different looking to everyone else, because she probably is. But to call her funny looking is getting incredibly close to crossing a line in my opinion. Children at that age are very easily changed by things people they look up to, like a teacher, says around them. I could understand that the teacher may have been trying to say that your daughter looks different, which they may call funny, to them, but it still just shouldn't be said. I'd let it barely pass this time, but if it ever happens again, or anything close, file the complaint.

 

[Simply Ravishing]

"Something along the lines of ''She is funny looking, especially to young children''"

When you say that she said "something along the lines of". Are you positive thats what was said? Or theres a chance it could have been different.

Cause my kids are mixed. And if a teacher has said to me that my kid was funny looking, the situation would of been takin care of right then and there. Id of went the hell off.

I recall in school as a kid, one girl was half german, half asian. Had the asian look with a german heavy german accent. And I remember as a kid thinking it was kinda funny, and something I havent seen before. But all us kids thought it was sooo cool aswell to be different like that. Hopefully for your kid it works out the same way, that while they get to know her more and grow up around her, it will become something very cool aswell. And she can really turn it around and take great pride in her heritage.

 

[Y 2 Jake]

Yeah, I think you're blowing it way out of proportion. With all due respect, I don't even know you child,but she probably IS funny looking to other kids. Now, to you and I, that means different looking, but to 5 year olds, she probably is funny looking. I seriously doubt that there are two many children in your daughter's school with Japanese characteristics, and Japanese eyes are certainly a unique characteristic.

I'm fully aware that to children she is funny looking. I have no problem with the lad who said it. But I still felt that it should have been bought to his parents, and the schools attention. You can't gag children I know that. But if it upsets my daughter then I'm going to have to put a stop to it before it starts. I admit it might have been a one off thing, but it might not have. But his parents agreed to have a word with him, that's all I asked. And I'm sure that's the end of it.

Now, I don't know what her meaning was, but she is right. Your child IS funny looking, to other students who have never had contact with someone that looks like her.

I'm under no illusions that most children on the street won't find her to be funny looking.

Like I said, I was not there, but I imagine that the teacher was trying to give you some insight on how the child is viewed by other children, not trying to insult your child. Maybe she could have worded it better, but i think if it were me in that place, that is what I would have been trying to be doing.

I discussed this all before the comment was made. I was the one that said that I was sure it wouldn't be the last time it happened. But I pointed out that it should be the last time that it's said by that particular child. The only problem I had was with what the teacher said. Later on I was aware that she'd just worded it wrong. But as a teacher I still think a little bit of tact wouldn't go amiss. Teaching really is one of those jobs where you should think before you speak. Especially considering there was no need for the comment. The meeting was finish and everything was in order.

Anyway. While She is funny looking to a child. I still maintain that to adults she's just different looking. She's only half Japanese & half English. The characteristics are still there, but they're slight.

 

[HBK-aholic]

I think I'd have slapped her right thereand then if she ever said that about a daughter of mine. "She is funny looking, especially" is her saying she also thinks your daughter is "funny looking" and children just think that more. It is racism, and she shouldn't be in the profession she is in.

I think you handled this correctly, and your views on it, and the child who made the original comment are spot on. But the teacher is out of line, and I´d definitely make an official complaint.

 

[Slyfox696]

Later on I was aware that she'd just worded it wrong. But as a teacher I still think a little bit of tact wouldn't go amiss. Teaching really is one of those jobs where you should think before you speak.

I agree wholeheartedly. Being an educator, and growing up in an education family, there is no doubt that how you say something is every bit as important as what you say. But we've all said things in ways that we didn't mean for them to be taken. When you told the teacher how you felt about the comment, did she apologize for it?

I think I'd have slapped her right thereand then if she ever said that about a daughter of mine.

Then I would have had you arrested for assault, right then and there. If you had one iota of a clue as to what teachers have to put up with, you'd very well think twice about your actions.

Hell, she just had some guy screaming at her for something she mistakenly said. She doesn't need you hitting her too.

"She is funny looking, especially" is her saying she also thinks your daughter is "funny looking" and children just think that more. It is racism, and she shouldn't be in the profession she is in.

And if she had made the same comment about a child who was born without eyebrows, would it be racist then?

The problem isn't near as much about racism as people keep saying. The problem that people are having (and I would have if the teacher was being mean-spirited) is that you have a teacher who obviously regards a child differently than others, which can lead to discriminating teaching (and no, I don't mean discrimination based on physical characteristics). The problem I would have is whether or not my child would be getting the right education from this individual who obviously does not see my child like she sees everyone else.

Racism really shouldn't play any part of this, in my opinion. And to say she shouldn't have her job because she makes a comment that someone might consider racist, is completely ridiculous.




One other thing. Is the teacher newer or more experienced (not how old, but how many years of teaching)?

 

[Rusty]

Jake, while I dont think you should make a formal complaint, you do have the right the be upset. I would be upset if it was my daughter, but I dont think I would take it very far. I agree with you that the teacher shouldn't have said she was "funny looking" as it is offensive, but I don't think your daughters teacher is racist.

To little kids, your daughter might look different, but I wouldn't worry too much about it in all honesty. As long as your daughter doesn't constantly get bullied by other children, she has nothing to worry about. The teacher was probably trying to been as nice as possible with dealing with this situation and you might have taken it the wrong way.

But if I was in your position, I wouldn't take much offence to it and I wouldn't file a complaint, but I would be a little upset and you as a parent, has every right to be upset.

 

[HBK-aholic]

And if she had made the same comment about a child who was born without eyebrows, would it be racist then?

The problem isn't near as much about racism as people keep saying. The problem that people are having (and I would have if the teacher was being mean-spirited) is that you have a teacher who obviously regards a child differently than others, which can lead to discriminating teaching (and no, I don't mean discrimination based on physical characteristics). The problem I would have is whether or not my child would be getting the right education from this individual who obviously does not see my child like she sees everyone else.

I agree with you in a way. I mean, with the eyebrows example, Id treat that just as seriously as if she'd said it about race, or anything else. If someone was randomly born with red eyes, and she called then funny looking, it's just as bad to do that.

It's the fact a teacher is using words like that to describe a child, as well as condoning anothers "bullying" by saying the child was right in a way.

Racism really shouldn't play any part of this, in my opinion. And to say she shouldn't have her job because she makes a comment that someone might consider racist, is completely ridiculous.

Actually, it isn't. Teachers, and other professionals shouldbe fully aware of different races, the fact people are different etc, and should definitely not make comments that could be perceived as racist, or any other comment offensive to children.

 

[Tastycles]

I think it depends on a number of things. "Funny looking" can be taken literally, in which case it is offensive and you had every right to be upset, but it also can be taken to mean "not the same", which from the sounds of things is not an incorrect statement. You said you hit the roof, was that in the school, or later on?

If it was in the school, how did the teacher react? There is a difference between the kind of embarrassed apology that would have come from saying it by mistake, to the kind of grovelling "I'm not really sorry, I just don't want to get sacked" apology. If it's the latter, you should be complaining.