klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
No Surrender 2007
Date: September 9, 2007
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West
This was a random show that I found once I realized I needed to do some more TNA. There isnt much at all of note on the card. The main event is Angle vs. Abyss which is either a random title defense or a feud I dont remember in the slightest. OH! This is the Angle defends all three titles in one night show. Ok that explains it. Last month Angle beat Joe to win literally every title in the company. Hes world, X, and tag champions (although he did name Sting as his partner). Yeah thats your story for tonight. Lets get to it.
The opening video kind of parodies the opening of Monday Night Football, asking if the fans are ready for some wrestling. Oh and Angle is wrestling a lot tonight too. Well its different if nothing else. This is also one of the nights for Team Pacman. I think part of my soul just died.
Tag Titles: Team Pacman vs. Sting/Kurt Angle
Oh thats right: Sting won a match to be get a title. What a concept. Team Pacman is R-Truth (Ron The Truth Killings) and Adam Pacman Jones. He was a guy that was arrested like 13 times and was involved in a shooting where a part time pro wrestler was paralyzed outside a club. Naturally TNA saw his suspension from the NFL as a great ratings grab so they signed him. Yeah it didnt go well.
Angle has a shirt on that says Tap or Snap, making me think of Daniel Bryans first promo. Shocking no one, Truth starts us off here for his team against Sting. He and Angle are a dream team apparently. Pacman wont come in so more or less this is a handicap match. Off to Angle now as it occurs to me the football intro was about him. Why do I have a bad feeling hes going to pin Sting or Angle? Pacman drops to the floor again and gets chased by Angle.
Back in the ring Truth gets a chinlock which Mike calls a sleeper hold. Karen, still Kurts wife here, comes to ringside. Sting cant stand her so thats an issue with the champions. She slaps Sting who doesnt shove her. He motions for her to go to the back and she throws herself down. Hey look the fans have a chant about it. Death Drop gets two on Truth. Sting hits the splash on Truth who falls onto Pacman for the tag. Angle hits the Slam on Sting and of course Pacman pins him for the titles. Screw you TNA, screw you to death.
Rating: D. The match was bad on top of all that. This was really just an angle with a match as a badkdrop. At the end of the day though, Pacman Jones, a guy that is more or less responsible for a man being paralyzed, has pinned Sting to win a championship in TNA. Celebrities in wrestling are fine, but know how to use them for the love of all things good and made of gouda.
We get a video of James Storm looking for Rhyno at a string of bars. Oh I hated this angle. This was when Rhyno was revealed to be a recovering alcoholic and Storm of course poured beer down his throat. After the feud ended, Rhyno relapsed and was gone for a few months (read as he was injured). Yeah it was stupid beyond belief. Never been a fan of angles like these at all.
Rhyno says that Terry Gerin (his real name) is an alcoholic that fell off the wagon five weeks ago but is sober tonight. Gore gore gore yeah we get it.
James Storm vs. Rhyno
This is before Beer Money of course so Storm is a singles guy. Rhyno charges down the ramp and chases Storm up the other ramp. Yeah this is back in the day when the faces and heels had their own entrance ramps. They realized that took up about 200 potential seats and stopped doing it. Huge brawl to start with Rhyno destroying him. This is before the bell mind you.
Theyre out in the crowd and Storm dives down onto Rhyno who slams him into a wall for his troubles. We head to the ramp as Rhyno goes for a suplex. The camera cuts to the entrance ramp by mistake and Storm counters into one of his own. Hey its a bell as were in the ring after like five minutes of brawling. Rhyno gets a belly to belly and is completely dominating early on.
Storm gets an enziguri and a Backstabber to take over for the first time. Very split crowd here. Hmm should we cheer for the alcoholic or the guy that loves BEER? Wait isnt that kind of the same thing? Storm hammers away for awhile and gets some two counts. This is just a match now after the big pre-match brawling segment. The idea here is that Rhyno only cares about the Gore. Out of NOWHERE he gets it and Storm kicks out. And there goes the point of the match.
Some fan hands Rhyno a chair and he calls for the Piledriver. He takes Storm up to the middle rope but Storm bites the nose to take over. Storm gets a Diamond Cutter off the middle rope onto chairs which of course only gets two. Its table time and Im sure thats not going to go bad for Storm, the guy that brought it out. Also I guess this is No DQ all of a sudden.
Rhyno hits what looked like a neckbreaker but was supposed to be a Samoan Drop but was called a fall away slam by Tenay. When you cant tell what a move is and have to play multiple choice, thats not saying much. The table is set up in the corner as Storm gets a middle rope suplex to take Rhyno down. Superkick misses and Rhyno Gores (tackles more realistically but you get the idea) through the table in one of the weakest table spots Ive ever seen ends it.
Rating: C-. Nothing special at all about this. Was there any point to Storm kicking out of the Gore earlier on? Not much of a match here but Ive seen far worse. This is one of those feuds that kept going on and on, even carrying over into the next year with Rhyno winning a scaffold match. No real soul to it if that makes sense, but it fits perfectly.
We recap the opening match. You know, for those people tuning into the PPV 15 minutes late.
In the back Angle is all pissed off and throwing chairs about losing the tag titles. Nash says that he didnt see Sting him Karen but Karen insists he did. Sting storms in and chokes Angle saying he didnt do it. Cornette comes in and says lets do this tomorrow. This would be Bound For Glory of course. He also throws out Karen and says if she doesnt then Kurt forfeits the other titles. Karens screeching would rival Vickie any day.
We recap Kaz vs. Roode. Kaz had been in Ravens team called Serotonin and is doing much better since leaving them. Roode had been on a loosing streak and blamed his chick Miss Boobs. Her name is Brooks but no one noticed anything but her boobs so why call it something else?
Robert Roode vs. Kaz
Yeah its Kaz at this point. He had embarrassed Roode somehow before this that I think was Roode getting pinned or something like that. Brooks might like Kaz. Can we just get to her costing him the match already? They go back and forth for a few minutes to start which is kind of interesting. Roodes finisher is the Perfectplex, called the Payoff. He cant get it early and they both tumble out to the floor.
Brooks is conflicted over who to help up. Roode sends Kaz into Brooks but Kaz puts on the brakes. Then he knocks Kaz into her to be a real dick. I know this match is good and theyve had a decent little feud built up, but I do not care for some reason. Its not interesting at all here and thats not a good thing at all. That usually isnt a problem for me but here it is.
Roode gets a back elbow and just as its about to connect we cut camera angles and the cameraman isnt ready for it so we get a shot of the crowd for a bit and miss the contact. Thats two errors already tonight that Ive noticed. Yes, mistakes can happen, but this is happening on a regular basis and has for awhile in this company. Chinlock by Roode lasts for about two seconds.
The fans think this is boring. Its no classic but its not exactly bad. Kaz gets a rollup for two and Brooks smiles. Do you get it yet? Do you get that she wants him to screw her? I dont think theyve made it clear in their first 10000 references to it. BIG spinebuster by Roode takes Kaz down. He pulls brass knucks or a chain out but Kaz gets a boot in. It was a chair. Brooks gets the chain. Hmm, I wonder whats going to happen.
A few fast rollups get two for Kaz. Missile dropkick puts Roode down. Roode blocks a springboard move and asks for the chain. Brooks kicks it under the ring though so Roode goes looking for it. Kaz gets a big tope con hilo to take down Roode on the floor after he used her for a shield a few seconds before. Kaz gets a jumping back elbow to take Roode down. Slingshot DDT gets two.
Kaz gets the reverse Piledriver to half kill Roode. I say half because it only gets two. Brooks continues to be all happy about it. Kaz sets for the Flux Capacitor (flipping downward spiral off the top) but has to settle for an X-Factor. He goes up for a guillotine legdrop but misses. Roode gets the Payoff for the pin. Nothing from Traci, nothing from the chain, no turn, NOTHING!
Rating: D+. Thats mostly for the lack of anything at the end. The match is ok, but Brooks (her first name is Traci if that clears anything up) was the focal point of it. Every five seconds the camera shifted to her and would be about her cheering for Kaz. You couple that in with the chain and the vast majority of stuff happening in this match went nowhere. Its like giving a three minute intro to a joke and forgetting the punch line. The match is ok, but the story or lack thereof behind it cripples this bad.
It would turn out that Brooks was chilling with Roode because her mom or grandmother was sick and he was paying for the bills or something like that. She still has a great rack.
Lethal is an underdog but he doesnt care. His Savage impression is mind blowingly good though. He thinks hes fighting Ricky Steamboat. Nash comes up (is he ever not on TV?) and says Lethal needs to take a dive tonight. Lethal says SNAP INTO IT OH YEAH! This would have been epic if it hadnt gone on for three years.
X-Division Title: Kurt Angle vs. Jay Lethal
Fans are totally behind Lethal who has about zero chance, which means hes likely to win. They try some speed stuff to start until Angle wakes up and uses his power and wrestling advantages. Double axe off the top by Lethal gets two. Angle is like bitch Im Kurt Angle and hits a buckle bomb to take over. Damn Angle vs. Savage would have been completely epic.
Down to the mat now and its almost all Angle. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two. Off to a chinlock but Lethal fights up and takes Angle down. Lethal speeds things up and gets an enziguri for two. This is all about Angle with Lethal just being there to fill in a place. HUGE release German changes the control with ease. I love those suplexes Angle throws. Theyre things of beauty.
Lethal counters a slam into a DDT for two. He looks like an idiot with his hair going all over the place. Hes far better now and has filled out a bit too. Lethal goes up for the elbow but Angle climbs the ropes to get the suplex for two. Ankle lock goes on for a second but Lethal counters and gets a small package for two. Rolling Germans go on but Lethal kicks out. These near falls are getting very close.
Angle goes for the Slam but Lethal counters with an arm drag. Lethal Combination (sets for a downward spiral but drops the guy forward into his knee and then the downward spiral) gets .nothing as instead he drops the elbow for two. Dude you hit a move with your name in it. It was over!
Angle tries a powerbomb but Lethal reverses and gets a rollup for two. Angle drills him with another German for his trouble. There go the straps but the Slam is reversed. Ankle Lock is reversed into a rollup, and in what is probably the biggest upset in TNA history up to that point (and still one of the biggest ever), Lethal gets the pin and the title. The X-Division guys come out to celebrate as Lethal is shocked that he did that.
Rating: B+. Surprisingly enough this was damn good. Something to keep in mind here: Lethal was an X-Division comedy guy and he just got a clean pin on the world champion. This was an excellent example of how you put someone over. Lethal won with a rollup, but he wasnt dominated at all.
This was back and forth and they looked like equals. Thats how you put someone over: you make them look like they belong in the same ring as you. Just a pin out of nowhere after getting destroyed for ten minutes doesnt prove anything. This was very good and a rather fun match. Check it out if youre really bored as it might be Lethals best match ever.
Black Reign, the multiple personality of Goldust (as in he would have blackouts and now remember what he did as Black Reign) has a rat named Misty who is his Arctic Fox. This was one of the dumbest ideas TNA has ever had. Let that sink in for a minute.
We recap Chris Harris vs. Black Reign. Reign beat him up at the last PPV and Harris wants revenge. Harris wants blood. Yeah thats it.
Chris Harris vs. Black Reign
Harris takes out Reign with a cross body to the floor to start us off. He sends Reign to the floor as this is one sided to start as more than one of the matches have been so far tonight. Harris grabs a chair and puts it to Reigns throat and slams the chair into the ground. This is officially a No DQ match. Why? Apparently it just is.
After a big move like that of course Reign is back up and is in control. After being in control for all of three seconds, Mike declares it all dominance by Black Reign the entire time. Can we get this over with already? Off to a short chinlock and this is dying quickly. Harris comes back and gets a bulldog to take him down. Final Cut from Reign gets no cover as he goes for that weapon that he used to hurt Harris at the previous show. Harris grabs a small package to end it.
Rating: F. This was one of the least interesting matches I have seen in a very long time. It came, it went, it sucked. Yeah Ive got nothing left to say here.
Harris handcuffs Reign post match and beats the hell out of him. Reign gets the key and gets out. This beatdown is going longer than the match. And then he puts the rat on Harris face. Why is this on a wrestling show?
Christians Coalition says that Christian is awesome and has never been beaten clean since he got here, which I think is true. We get some racists jokes as Im trying to get back into this show after that awful ten minutes of bullshit just before this interview. Christian talks a lot. AJ is still a blithering idiot at this point. Yes make sure to note that once a WWE guy comes in, the homegrown star of TNA becomes STUPID!
Tag Team Gauntlet
Now of course instead of a Gauntlet match, this is TNA so were going to have a different kind of match. This is ten team battle royal where people enter individually at one minute intervals. In other words, this is guaranteed to go at least 19 minutes (and no that isnt a setup for a future joke about the time lapse like in the Rumble). Winner gets the title shot at Bound for Glory.
AJ vs. Christopher Daniels to start. Ill let you know who the partners are as we go but I think youll get the idea. Apparently once we get down to the final two the partners come back out and its a run of the mill tag match. This is what were talking about when we say overcomplicating matches. And no Im not saying those rules are complicated. Im saying have a tag match or have a battle royal but dont combine them.
They put on a gymnast routine for awhile. Eric Young will be #20. In at number three is Homicide and I think you know which team he represents. The indy wrestling scene here kills me. Homicide gets a belly to belly on AJ but gets beaten down by AJ and Daniels. Sabin comes in fourth and the beating is on. All Sabin here and hes a Machinegun at this point.
Naturally there are a ton of strikes in this match because of all the indy guys in there. Serotonin sends in Havok, more commonly known as Johnny Devine. No one out yet. Sabin gets a springboard clothesline to take down Sabin and here comes #6: Petey Williams. Homicide is eliminated as Williams comes in. Destroyer to Havok to more or less kill him.
With only four people in the ring at the highest amount so far there isnt much that can be said here. Springboard tornado DDT from Sabin to AJ is countered and there he goes. D-Von comes in next and cleans house. Remember that if a person is thrown out they could still come back if their partner gets down to the final two in the battle royal. I cant tell what Team 3D is this week because the fans do a double chant of course.
Jimmy Rave is number seven in a return for him. He gets a Fujiwara Armbar on AJ for a bit and heres Bubba at number eight. I think its 8 at least. This really isnt interesting in the slightest so far. There goes Havok. D-Von has his name on his tights. Is that in case he forgets which are his? In next is Raven who was Havoks partner. He hammers away on AJ and goes after Daniels a bit. Team 3D comes up from behind him to throw him over and eliminate the entire Serotonin team.
Shark Boy, Eric Youngs partner, is in next. Sharkie beats up just about everyone which almost everyone else has done already anyway. Naturally he bites the ass of D-Von but backs into Ray who throws him out. Next up is Sonjay Dutt, the partner of Petey Williams. Rave is gone as is Williams. AJ, Daniels, Team 3D and Dutt are in the ring now. Running STO from Daniels takes down D-Von but he walks into a Bubba Bomb.
BG James is in at whatever number that is. I think its 13 but Ive kind of lost track/dont care. The fans want Shelley. In next is SuperMex. He gets a chokeslam suplex (Crackerjack apparently) to Dutt. A few people hammer on him as were down to five seconds. The time is way off again of course. Its Tomko, the partner of AJ. The Dudleys meet him but he fights off the power of fat.
Ray runs into D-Von to put him out and Tomko throws out Ray to end the team. Tomko and Hernandez square off but AJ and Daniels break that up. Elix Skipper, the partner of Daniels, is in next. XXX, Daniels and Skipper that is, tries to get rid of Tomko but that fails completely. In next is Shelley to a big pop, obviously part of the Guns. There goes BG. Way too many people in there at the moment to give you a rundown.
Lance Hoyt, aka Vance Archer, the partner of Jimmy Rave is in. Were running out of people to come in. If my math is right that was 18. Yeah it was 18th. Hoyt LAUNCHES Skipper out with ease. In next is Kip James (Billy Gunn) and he cleans house. Dutt again tries to get a hug, which he did to Shelley. Sonjay is out so his team is gone. Heres Eric to finish out the participants.
Ok lets see: Young, Hernandez, Kip, Tomko, AJ, Shelley, Daniels and Hoyt. I think thats everyone at least. Young keeps putting headlocks on people. Hernandez and Tomko have another battle of the bald and Styles has to save him. Tomko gets a nice lift to put Hernandez out. Young comes out of NOWHERE to put Tomko out. There goes Hoyt. Daniels and James put each other out and were down to Young, Styles and Shelley.
The fans are almost all behind Shelley. Naturally it would take almost three years for the Guns to get the titles. This doesnt last long as Young gets some momentum going but is thrown to the apron. AJ fights him out there a bit but Young gets back in. Shelley and AJ get together and throw him out with ease. Now we have Shelley vs. AJ but since they could tear the house down, we bring back their partners.
Ok so now its AJ/Tomko vs. the Guns in a standard tag match for the shot at R-Truth and a football player. Makes as much sense as anything else right? Shelly and Tomko start us off and the Guns get into their zone. Tomko no sells their stuff and brings in AJ. He puts on a damn clinic (and remember he was the first guy in the battle royal so hes been out there well over 20 minutes). The Guns crank it up again and destroy Tomko. Down to Sabin vs. AJ and its a Pele. Sabin gets an OConnor Roll but AJ rolls through it and grabs the tights for the pin.
Rating: D. Well it was long. Im not entirely sure what else to say about it. The battle royal aspect more or less sucked as the intervals made it hard to care about anything that was going on and the double elimination didnt help at all either. The ending tag match was maybe three minutes long and felt about as tacked on as you could ask it to be. Im not sure why this match got nearly half an hour in the middle of the show but it wasnt very good at all and brought the show to a big halt.
Joe and his family are here and hes mad at Christian. This was a big old feud and this was one of the first matches in it. Joe cost Christian the #1 contender spot and Christian hurt some of Joes family. This is the result.
Christian Cage vs. Samoa Joe
Christian has been here over two years and has never been pinned or submitted. Joe has the full on tribal entrance which Im never sure what to think of. He barges through that and goes straight for Christian. Joe gets a long Face Wash to Christian in the corner. On the floor he gets Christian in a powerbomb position and slams Christian into the railing. I love that spot.
Theyre on the ramp now and its Joe in control. Here in the second to last match, were told that Cornette told the referees to give the guys some leeway tonight. Thanks for letting us know that two hours ago guys. Christian fights back a bit but jumps into a kick in the head to take him back to the floor. Suicide Dive (I know its called a Tope Suicida but screw that shit) kills Christian all over again.
As Joe gets back in though Christian kicks the ropes to mess Joe up and momentum shifts a bit for the first time in the match. Reverse chinlock by Christian which gets him nowhere for the most part. Joe stands up and drops Christian down onto his back to break the hold. Backsplash eats knees though and Christian gets two off that. Christian Face Washes Joe in the corner to continue his dominance.
With Joe still in the corner Christian charges again and walks into a release Rock Bottom to break his momentum. Death Valley Driver gets two for Joe. Christian avoids a charge and the back and forth aspect of this match continues. The Clutch and the Unprettier are both blocked and the Frog Splash from Christian misses. Powerbomb by Joe gets two and he turns it over into an STF which has Christian in trouble.
Off to a Crossface instead which Christian reverses into a rollup for two. MuscleBuster is blocked but a suplex gets two. Christian goes up but is caught by nothing as he reverses and gets the reverse DDT off the middle rope for two. Unprettier is reversed into the Koquina Clutch and Christian grabs the rope.
Joe wont let it go so he beats up the referee instead. A bunch of guys come out to break it up but Joe keeps at it. The match is a DQ of course. Joe beats up the X Division guys and hangs Christian. Cornette and his (blonde) enforcer, Matt Morgan comes out to pull Joe off. He wouldnt have a match like forever.
Rating: B-. Decent match here but it never got off the ground for some reason. It was a good brawl, but they needed a few less counters. They couldnt decide if it was a brawl or a match which isnt a good thing. It worked pretty well for the most part but it was missing a few parts which holds it back.
JB is with Angle and Nash and Angle is furious. He says he kicked out of Lethals rollup and it was only two. Nash tells him to calm down which doesnt seem to do much. Angle shoves him and tells Nash he doesnt know what this is like. Why is Nash the mentor for everyone, especially bigger stars than him?
Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He says its time for TNA to take the next step and its that Impact is going to two hours. Since its TNA this gets a video package.
Team Pacman is happy. Nice to see this two hours after they won. Jones of course messes up the name of Bound For Glory. Maybe because he isnt a wrestler?
We recap Angles night so far which takes way too long.
TNA World Title: Abyss vs. Kurt Angle
James Mitchell is back to torment Abyss. Angle has the IWGP Title too. Naturally we get Big Match Intros. Abyss is listed as a former world champion here which you never hear about anymore. Hebner actually goes through the rules of the match which you never see anymore. Angle gets into a crouch to start. I have no idea why Abyss has this show as I guess that isnt important.
Abyss overpowers him and rams his ample ass into Kurts stomach to break up a waist lock. Crowd is split here and a shoulder sends Kurt to the floor. Naturally Angle uses wrestling to take Abyss down. Abyss sits him on the top rope and pats Angle on the head. Thats a stupid, stupid man. Angle hammers away which doesnt do much at all.
Abyss grabs the singlet and Angle tries to run. Is this a comedy match? Im not used to Abyss being a face at all so its taking a little time to get used to. Out to the floor and Angle is sent into the railing. Back in and Abyss wants a powerslam but Angle reverses and hits a chop block. Off to the knee now which makes sense for Kurt. Leg lock goes on as the working on it continues.
Clothesline misses for the big man and his knee gets taken down again. Abyss fights out of the leg lock but keeps getting kicked in it. Angle has a clear game plan here. Abyss gets a clothesline and runs to a rope to lean on. Abyss-a-Mania isnt quite running wild though as he misses a clothesline. Angle tries a German and says spinebuster which Abyss hits a few seconds later for two. Well if nothing else he follows orders well. Thats a good Abyss.
Angle charges in the corner and his shoulder eats steel. Shock Treatment hits as his knee is suddenly healthy enough to get up and drop him down like that. Chokeslam is countered into a rollup for two. Splash in the corner misses and theres the German. You knew it was coming. There go the straps and the Olympic Slam hits for two. Ankle lock cant quite go on and the Chokeslam gets two.
There goes the knee again with a shoulder block into it. The Moonsault actually hits for two and its another leg lock. Angle tries to get the boot of Abyss off. Isnt that usually done to make a foot feel better? Abyss in white socks is a very weird sight to see. Kurt tries to get a shot off the top on the ankle but jumps into a choke.
That gets countered and Abyss hits the Black Hole Slam for two. Abyss embraces his inner Kane and tries a Tombstone but Kurt reverses into the Ankle Lock for the tap out. He held on for like a minute before he tapped but the grapevine sealed it. West: Most people would have tapped out five minutes ago! You know, before the hold was on.
Rating: C+. Well it wasnt bad but was there ever any doubt about Abyss losing here? Angle winning makes perfect sense as he lost the previous two matches and had to win the final one. Abyss put on a decent match here but he used about three moves in total. Its not bad but for the end of a PPV, this is hardly anything epic. The psychology was good here though as you would expect in an Angle match.
Mitchell pops up on the screen and says hes going to take Abyss to hell with him. After some laughing, Abyss is pulled down through a hole in the ring. This would be Mesias which was a really stupid angle for the most part that wound up sucking.
An ad for Bound For Glory takes us out.
Overall Rating: D+. Well some of the stuff was good, but the problem is that this show is totally forgettable. That was the issue with a lot of TNAs stuff from this era as their game plan seemed to be Here are Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe. The rest can work itself out. This was nothing special at all and having all the titles on one guy coming in was really stupid. Nothing of note here but Lethal vs. Angle isnt too bad. Not a bad show at all, but really nothing that Ill ever want to see again.
Date: September 9, 2007
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 900
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West
This was a random show that I found once I realized I needed to do some more TNA. There isnt much at all of note on the card. The main event is Angle vs. Abyss which is either a random title defense or a feud I dont remember in the slightest. OH! This is the Angle defends all three titles in one night show. Ok that explains it. Last month Angle beat Joe to win literally every title in the company. Hes world, X, and tag champions (although he did name Sting as his partner). Yeah thats your story for tonight. Lets get to it.
The opening video kind of parodies the opening of Monday Night Football, asking if the fans are ready for some wrestling. Oh and Angle is wrestling a lot tonight too. Well its different if nothing else. This is also one of the nights for Team Pacman. I think part of my soul just died.
Tag Titles: Team Pacman vs. Sting/Kurt Angle
Oh thats right: Sting won a match to be get a title. What a concept. Team Pacman is R-Truth (Ron The Truth Killings) and Adam Pacman Jones. He was a guy that was arrested like 13 times and was involved in a shooting where a part time pro wrestler was paralyzed outside a club. Naturally TNA saw his suspension from the NFL as a great ratings grab so they signed him. Yeah it didnt go well.
Angle has a shirt on that says Tap or Snap, making me think of Daniel Bryans first promo. Shocking no one, Truth starts us off here for his team against Sting. He and Angle are a dream team apparently. Pacman wont come in so more or less this is a handicap match. Off to Angle now as it occurs to me the football intro was about him. Why do I have a bad feeling hes going to pin Sting or Angle? Pacman drops to the floor again and gets chased by Angle.
Back in the ring Truth gets a chinlock which Mike calls a sleeper hold. Karen, still Kurts wife here, comes to ringside. Sting cant stand her so thats an issue with the champions. She slaps Sting who doesnt shove her. He motions for her to go to the back and she throws herself down. Hey look the fans have a chant about it. Death Drop gets two on Truth. Sting hits the splash on Truth who falls onto Pacman for the tag. Angle hits the Slam on Sting and of course Pacman pins him for the titles. Screw you TNA, screw you to death.
Rating: D. The match was bad on top of all that. This was really just an angle with a match as a badkdrop. At the end of the day though, Pacman Jones, a guy that is more or less responsible for a man being paralyzed, has pinned Sting to win a championship in TNA. Celebrities in wrestling are fine, but know how to use them for the love of all things good and made of gouda.
We get a video of James Storm looking for Rhyno at a string of bars. Oh I hated this angle. This was when Rhyno was revealed to be a recovering alcoholic and Storm of course poured beer down his throat. After the feud ended, Rhyno relapsed and was gone for a few months (read as he was injured). Yeah it was stupid beyond belief. Never been a fan of angles like these at all.
Rhyno says that Terry Gerin (his real name) is an alcoholic that fell off the wagon five weeks ago but is sober tonight. Gore gore gore yeah we get it.
James Storm vs. Rhyno
This is before Beer Money of course so Storm is a singles guy. Rhyno charges down the ramp and chases Storm up the other ramp. Yeah this is back in the day when the faces and heels had their own entrance ramps. They realized that took up about 200 potential seats and stopped doing it. Huge brawl to start with Rhyno destroying him. This is before the bell mind you.
Theyre out in the crowd and Storm dives down onto Rhyno who slams him into a wall for his troubles. We head to the ramp as Rhyno goes for a suplex. The camera cuts to the entrance ramp by mistake and Storm counters into one of his own. Hey its a bell as were in the ring after like five minutes of brawling. Rhyno gets a belly to belly and is completely dominating early on.
Storm gets an enziguri and a Backstabber to take over for the first time. Very split crowd here. Hmm should we cheer for the alcoholic or the guy that loves BEER? Wait isnt that kind of the same thing? Storm hammers away for awhile and gets some two counts. This is just a match now after the big pre-match brawling segment. The idea here is that Rhyno only cares about the Gore. Out of NOWHERE he gets it and Storm kicks out. And there goes the point of the match.
Some fan hands Rhyno a chair and he calls for the Piledriver. He takes Storm up to the middle rope but Storm bites the nose to take over. Storm gets a Diamond Cutter off the middle rope onto chairs which of course only gets two. Its table time and Im sure thats not going to go bad for Storm, the guy that brought it out. Also I guess this is No DQ all of a sudden.
Rhyno hits what looked like a neckbreaker but was supposed to be a Samoan Drop but was called a fall away slam by Tenay. When you cant tell what a move is and have to play multiple choice, thats not saying much. The table is set up in the corner as Storm gets a middle rope suplex to take Rhyno down. Superkick misses and Rhyno Gores (tackles more realistically but you get the idea) through the table in one of the weakest table spots Ive ever seen ends it.
Rating: C-. Nothing special at all about this. Was there any point to Storm kicking out of the Gore earlier on? Not much of a match here but Ive seen far worse. This is one of those feuds that kept going on and on, even carrying over into the next year with Rhyno winning a scaffold match. No real soul to it if that makes sense, but it fits perfectly.
We recap the opening match. You know, for those people tuning into the PPV 15 minutes late.
In the back Angle is all pissed off and throwing chairs about losing the tag titles. Nash says that he didnt see Sting him Karen but Karen insists he did. Sting storms in and chokes Angle saying he didnt do it. Cornette comes in and says lets do this tomorrow. This would be Bound For Glory of course. He also throws out Karen and says if she doesnt then Kurt forfeits the other titles. Karens screeching would rival Vickie any day.
We recap Kaz vs. Roode. Kaz had been in Ravens team called Serotonin and is doing much better since leaving them. Roode had been on a loosing streak and blamed his chick Miss Boobs. Her name is Brooks but no one noticed anything but her boobs so why call it something else?
Robert Roode vs. Kaz
Yeah its Kaz at this point. He had embarrassed Roode somehow before this that I think was Roode getting pinned or something like that. Brooks might like Kaz. Can we just get to her costing him the match already? They go back and forth for a few minutes to start which is kind of interesting. Roodes finisher is the Perfectplex, called the Payoff. He cant get it early and they both tumble out to the floor.
Brooks is conflicted over who to help up. Roode sends Kaz into Brooks but Kaz puts on the brakes. Then he knocks Kaz into her to be a real dick. I know this match is good and theyve had a decent little feud built up, but I do not care for some reason. Its not interesting at all here and thats not a good thing at all. That usually isnt a problem for me but here it is.
Roode gets a back elbow and just as its about to connect we cut camera angles and the cameraman isnt ready for it so we get a shot of the crowd for a bit and miss the contact. Thats two errors already tonight that Ive noticed. Yes, mistakes can happen, but this is happening on a regular basis and has for awhile in this company. Chinlock by Roode lasts for about two seconds.
The fans think this is boring. Its no classic but its not exactly bad. Kaz gets a rollup for two and Brooks smiles. Do you get it yet? Do you get that she wants him to screw her? I dont think theyve made it clear in their first 10000 references to it. BIG spinebuster by Roode takes Kaz down. He pulls brass knucks or a chain out but Kaz gets a boot in. It was a chair. Brooks gets the chain. Hmm, I wonder whats going to happen.
A few fast rollups get two for Kaz. Missile dropkick puts Roode down. Roode blocks a springboard move and asks for the chain. Brooks kicks it under the ring though so Roode goes looking for it. Kaz gets a big tope con hilo to take down Roode on the floor after he used her for a shield a few seconds before. Kaz gets a jumping back elbow to take Roode down. Slingshot DDT gets two.
Kaz gets the reverse Piledriver to half kill Roode. I say half because it only gets two. Brooks continues to be all happy about it. Kaz sets for the Flux Capacitor (flipping downward spiral off the top) but has to settle for an X-Factor. He goes up for a guillotine legdrop but misses. Roode gets the Payoff for the pin. Nothing from Traci, nothing from the chain, no turn, NOTHING!
Rating: D+. Thats mostly for the lack of anything at the end. The match is ok, but Brooks (her first name is Traci if that clears anything up) was the focal point of it. Every five seconds the camera shifted to her and would be about her cheering for Kaz. You couple that in with the chain and the vast majority of stuff happening in this match went nowhere. Its like giving a three minute intro to a joke and forgetting the punch line. The match is ok, but the story or lack thereof behind it cripples this bad.
It would turn out that Brooks was chilling with Roode because her mom or grandmother was sick and he was paying for the bills or something like that. She still has a great rack.
Lethal is an underdog but he doesnt care. His Savage impression is mind blowingly good though. He thinks hes fighting Ricky Steamboat. Nash comes up (is he ever not on TV?) and says Lethal needs to take a dive tonight. Lethal says SNAP INTO IT OH YEAH! This would have been epic if it hadnt gone on for three years.
X-Division Title: Kurt Angle vs. Jay Lethal
Fans are totally behind Lethal who has about zero chance, which means hes likely to win. They try some speed stuff to start until Angle wakes up and uses his power and wrestling advantages. Double axe off the top by Lethal gets two. Angle is like bitch Im Kurt Angle and hits a buckle bomb to take over. Damn Angle vs. Savage would have been completely epic.
Down to the mat now and its almost all Angle. Tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two. Off to a chinlock but Lethal fights up and takes Angle down. Lethal speeds things up and gets an enziguri for two. This is all about Angle with Lethal just being there to fill in a place. HUGE release German changes the control with ease. I love those suplexes Angle throws. Theyre things of beauty.
Lethal counters a slam into a DDT for two. He looks like an idiot with his hair going all over the place. Hes far better now and has filled out a bit too. Lethal goes up for the elbow but Angle climbs the ropes to get the suplex for two. Ankle lock goes on for a second but Lethal counters and gets a small package for two. Rolling Germans go on but Lethal kicks out. These near falls are getting very close.
Angle goes for the Slam but Lethal counters with an arm drag. Lethal Combination (sets for a downward spiral but drops the guy forward into his knee and then the downward spiral) gets .nothing as instead he drops the elbow for two. Dude you hit a move with your name in it. It was over!
Angle tries a powerbomb but Lethal reverses and gets a rollup for two. Angle drills him with another German for his trouble. There go the straps but the Slam is reversed. Ankle Lock is reversed into a rollup, and in what is probably the biggest upset in TNA history up to that point (and still one of the biggest ever), Lethal gets the pin and the title. The X-Division guys come out to celebrate as Lethal is shocked that he did that.
Rating: B+. Surprisingly enough this was damn good. Something to keep in mind here: Lethal was an X-Division comedy guy and he just got a clean pin on the world champion. This was an excellent example of how you put someone over. Lethal won with a rollup, but he wasnt dominated at all.
This was back and forth and they looked like equals. Thats how you put someone over: you make them look like they belong in the same ring as you. Just a pin out of nowhere after getting destroyed for ten minutes doesnt prove anything. This was very good and a rather fun match. Check it out if youre really bored as it might be Lethals best match ever.
Black Reign, the multiple personality of Goldust (as in he would have blackouts and now remember what he did as Black Reign) has a rat named Misty who is his Arctic Fox. This was one of the dumbest ideas TNA has ever had. Let that sink in for a minute.
We recap Chris Harris vs. Black Reign. Reign beat him up at the last PPV and Harris wants revenge. Harris wants blood. Yeah thats it.
Chris Harris vs. Black Reign
Harris takes out Reign with a cross body to the floor to start us off. He sends Reign to the floor as this is one sided to start as more than one of the matches have been so far tonight. Harris grabs a chair and puts it to Reigns throat and slams the chair into the ground. This is officially a No DQ match. Why? Apparently it just is.
After a big move like that of course Reign is back up and is in control. After being in control for all of three seconds, Mike declares it all dominance by Black Reign the entire time. Can we get this over with already? Off to a short chinlock and this is dying quickly. Harris comes back and gets a bulldog to take him down. Final Cut from Reign gets no cover as he goes for that weapon that he used to hurt Harris at the previous show. Harris grabs a small package to end it.
Rating: F. This was one of the least interesting matches I have seen in a very long time. It came, it went, it sucked. Yeah Ive got nothing left to say here.
Harris handcuffs Reign post match and beats the hell out of him. Reign gets the key and gets out. This beatdown is going longer than the match. And then he puts the rat on Harris face. Why is this on a wrestling show?
Christians Coalition says that Christian is awesome and has never been beaten clean since he got here, which I think is true. We get some racists jokes as Im trying to get back into this show after that awful ten minutes of bullshit just before this interview. Christian talks a lot. AJ is still a blithering idiot at this point. Yes make sure to note that once a WWE guy comes in, the homegrown star of TNA becomes STUPID!
Tag Team Gauntlet
Now of course instead of a Gauntlet match, this is TNA so were going to have a different kind of match. This is ten team battle royal where people enter individually at one minute intervals. In other words, this is guaranteed to go at least 19 minutes (and no that isnt a setup for a future joke about the time lapse like in the Rumble). Winner gets the title shot at Bound for Glory.
AJ vs. Christopher Daniels to start. Ill let you know who the partners are as we go but I think youll get the idea. Apparently once we get down to the final two the partners come back out and its a run of the mill tag match. This is what were talking about when we say overcomplicating matches. And no Im not saying those rules are complicated. Im saying have a tag match or have a battle royal but dont combine them.
They put on a gymnast routine for awhile. Eric Young will be #20. In at number three is Homicide and I think you know which team he represents. The indy wrestling scene here kills me. Homicide gets a belly to belly on AJ but gets beaten down by AJ and Daniels. Sabin comes in fourth and the beating is on. All Sabin here and hes a Machinegun at this point.
Naturally there are a ton of strikes in this match because of all the indy guys in there. Serotonin sends in Havok, more commonly known as Johnny Devine. No one out yet. Sabin gets a springboard clothesline to take down Sabin and here comes #6: Petey Williams. Homicide is eliminated as Williams comes in. Destroyer to Havok to more or less kill him.
With only four people in the ring at the highest amount so far there isnt much that can be said here. Springboard tornado DDT from Sabin to AJ is countered and there he goes. D-Von comes in next and cleans house. Remember that if a person is thrown out they could still come back if their partner gets down to the final two in the battle royal. I cant tell what Team 3D is this week because the fans do a double chant of course.
Jimmy Rave is number seven in a return for him. He gets a Fujiwara Armbar on AJ for a bit and heres Bubba at number eight. I think its 8 at least. This really isnt interesting in the slightest so far. There goes Havok. D-Von has his name on his tights. Is that in case he forgets which are his? In next is Raven who was Havoks partner. He hammers away on AJ and goes after Daniels a bit. Team 3D comes up from behind him to throw him over and eliminate the entire Serotonin team.
Shark Boy, Eric Youngs partner, is in next. Sharkie beats up just about everyone which almost everyone else has done already anyway. Naturally he bites the ass of D-Von but backs into Ray who throws him out. Next up is Sonjay Dutt, the partner of Petey Williams. Rave is gone as is Williams. AJ, Daniels, Team 3D and Dutt are in the ring now. Running STO from Daniels takes down D-Von but he walks into a Bubba Bomb.
BG James is in at whatever number that is. I think its 13 but Ive kind of lost track/dont care. The fans want Shelley. In next is SuperMex. He gets a chokeslam suplex (Crackerjack apparently) to Dutt. A few people hammer on him as were down to five seconds. The time is way off again of course. Its Tomko, the partner of AJ. The Dudleys meet him but he fights off the power of fat.
Ray runs into D-Von to put him out and Tomko throws out Ray to end the team. Tomko and Hernandez square off but AJ and Daniels break that up. Elix Skipper, the partner of Daniels, is in next. XXX, Daniels and Skipper that is, tries to get rid of Tomko but that fails completely. In next is Shelley to a big pop, obviously part of the Guns. There goes BG. Way too many people in there at the moment to give you a rundown.
Lance Hoyt, aka Vance Archer, the partner of Jimmy Rave is in. Were running out of people to come in. If my math is right that was 18. Yeah it was 18th. Hoyt LAUNCHES Skipper out with ease. In next is Kip James (Billy Gunn) and he cleans house. Dutt again tries to get a hug, which he did to Shelley. Sonjay is out so his team is gone. Heres Eric to finish out the participants.
Ok lets see: Young, Hernandez, Kip, Tomko, AJ, Shelley, Daniels and Hoyt. I think thats everyone at least. Young keeps putting headlocks on people. Hernandez and Tomko have another battle of the bald and Styles has to save him. Tomko gets a nice lift to put Hernandez out. Young comes out of NOWHERE to put Tomko out. There goes Hoyt. Daniels and James put each other out and were down to Young, Styles and Shelley.
The fans are almost all behind Shelley. Naturally it would take almost three years for the Guns to get the titles. This doesnt last long as Young gets some momentum going but is thrown to the apron. AJ fights him out there a bit but Young gets back in. Shelley and AJ get together and throw him out with ease. Now we have Shelley vs. AJ but since they could tear the house down, we bring back their partners.
Ok so now its AJ/Tomko vs. the Guns in a standard tag match for the shot at R-Truth and a football player. Makes as much sense as anything else right? Shelly and Tomko start us off and the Guns get into their zone. Tomko no sells their stuff and brings in AJ. He puts on a damn clinic (and remember he was the first guy in the battle royal so hes been out there well over 20 minutes). The Guns crank it up again and destroy Tomko. Down to Sabin vs. AJ and its a Pele. Sabin gets an OConnor Roll but AJ rolls through it and grabs the tights for the pin.
Rating: D. Well it was long. Im not entirely sure what else to say about it. The battle royal aspect more or less sucked as the intervals made it hard to care about anything that was going on and the double elimination didnt help at all either. The ending tag match was maybe three minutes long and felt about as tacked on as you could ask it to be. Im not sure why this match got nearly half an hour in the middle of the show but it wasnt very good at all and brought the show to a big halt.
Joe and his family are here and hes mad at Christian. This was a big old feud and this was one of the first matches in it. Joe cost Christian the #1 contender spot and Christian hurt some of Joes family. This is the result.
Christian Cage vs. Samoa Joe
Christian has been here over two years and has never been pinned or submitted. Joe has the full on tribal entrance which Im never sure what to think of. He barges through that and goes straight for Christian. Joe gets a long Face Wash to Christian in the corner. On the floor he gets Christian in a powerbomb position and slams Christian into the railing. I love that spot.
Theyre on the ramp now and its Joe in control. Here in the second to last match, were told that Cornette told the referees to give the guys some leeway tonight. Thanks for letting us know that two hours ago guys. Christian fights back a bit but jumps into a kick in the head to take him back to the floor. Suicide Dive (I know its called a Tope Suicida but screw that shit) kills Christian all over again.
As Joe gets back in though Christian kicks the ropes to mess Joe up and momentum shifts a bit for the first time in the match. Reverse chinlock by Christian which gets him nowhere for the most part. Joe stands up and drops Christian down onto his back to break the hold. Backsplash eats knees though and Christian gets two off that. Christian Face Washes Joe in the corner to continue his dominance.
With Joe still in the corner Christian charges again and walks into a release Rock Bottom to break his momentum. Death Valley Driver gets two for Joe. Christian avoids a charge and the back and forth aspect of this match continues. The Clutch and the Unprettier are both blocked and the Frog Splash from Christian misses. Powerbomb by Joe gets two and he turns it over into an STF which has Christian in trouble.
Off to a Crossface instead which Christian reverses into a rollup for two. MuscleBuster is blocked but a suplex gets two. Christian goes up but is caught by nothing as he reverses and gets the reverse DDT off the middle rope for two. Unprettier is reversed into the Koquina Clutch and Christian grabs the rope.
Joe wont let it go so he beats up the referee instead. A bunch of guys come out to break it up but Joe keeps at it. The match is a DQ of course. Joe beats up the X Division guys and hangs Christian. Cornette and his (blonde) enforcer, Matt Morgan comes out to pull Joe off. He wouldnt have a match like forever.
Rating: B-. Decent match here but it never got off the ground for some reason. It was a good brawl, but they needed a few less counters. They couldnt decide if it was a brawl or a match which isnt a good thing. It worked pretty well for the most part but it was missing a few parts which holds it back.
JB is with Angle and Nash and Angle is furious. He says he kicked out of Lethals rollup and it was only two. Nash tells him to calm down which doesnt seem to do much. Angle shoves him and tells Nash he doesnt know what this is like. Why is Nash the mentor for everyone, especially bigger stars than him?
Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He says its time for TNA to take the next step and its that Impact is going to two hours. Since its TNA this gets a video package.
Team Pacman is happy. Nice to see this two hours after they won. Jones of course messes up the name of Bound For Glory. Maybe because he isnt a wrestler?
We recap Angles night so far which takes way too long.
TNA World Title: Abyss vs. Kurt Angle
James Mitchell is back to torment Abyss. Angle has the IWGP Title too. Naturally we get Big Match Intros. Abyss is listed as a former world champion here which you never hear about anymore. Hebner actually goes through the rules of the match which you never see anymore. Angle gets into a crouch to start. I have no idea why Abyss has this show as I guess that isnt important.
Abyss overpowers him and rams his ample ass into Kurts stomach to break up a waist lock. Crowd is split here and a shoulder sends Kurt to the floor. Naturally Angle uses wrestling to take Abyss down. Abyss sits him on the top rope and pats Angle on the head. Thats a stupid, stupid man. Angle hammers away which doesnt do much at all.
Abyss grabs the singlet and Angle tries to run. Is this a comedy match? Im not used to Abyss being a face at all so its taking a little time to get used to. Out to the floor and Angle is sent into the railing. Back in and Abyss wants a powerslam but Angle reverses and hits a chop block. Off to the knee now which makes sense for Kurt. Leg lock goes on as the working on it continues.
Clothesline misses for the big man and his knee gets taken down again. Abyss fights out of the leg lock but keeps getting kicked in it. Angle has a clear game plan here. Abyss gets a clothesline and runs to a rope to lean on. Abyss-a-Mania isnt quite running wild though as he misses a clothesline. Angle tries a German and says spinebuster which Abyss hits a few seconds later for two. Well if nothing else he follows orders well. Thats a good Abyss.
Angle charges in the corner and his shoulder eats steel. Shock Treatment hits as his knee is suddenly healthy enough to get up and drop him down like that. Chokeslam is countered into a rollup for two. Splash in the corner misses and theres the German. You knew it was coming. There go the straps and the Olympic Slam hits for two. Ankle lock cant quite go on and the Chokeslam gets two.
There goes the knee again with a shoulder block into it. The Moonsault actually hits for two and its another leg lock. Angle tries to get the boot of Abyss off. Isnt that usually done to make a foot feel better? Abyss in white socks is a very weird sight to see. Kurt tries to get a shot off the top on the ankle but jumps into a choke.
That gets countered and Abyss hits the Black Hole Slam for two. Abyss embraces his inner Kane and tries a Tombstone but Kurt reverses into the Ankle Lock for the tap out. He held on for like a minute before he tapped but the grapevine sealed it. West: Most people would have tapped out five minutes ago! You know, before the hold was on.
Rating: C+. Well it wasnt bad but was there ever any doubt about Abyss losing here? Angle winning makes perfect sense as he lost the previous two matches and had to win the final one. Abyss put on a decent match here but he used about three moves in total. Its not bad but for the end of a PPV, this is hardly anything epic. The psychology was good here though as you would expect in an Angle match.
Mitchell pops up on the screen and says hes going to take Abyss to hell with him. After some laughing, Abyss is pulled down through a hole in the ring. This would be Mesias which was a really stupid angle for the most part that wound up sucking.
An ad for Bound For Glory takes us out.
Overall Rating: D+. Well some of the stuff was good, but the problem is that this show is totally forgettable. That was the issue with a lot of TNAs stuff from this era as their game plan seemed to be Here are Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe. The rest can work itself out. This was nothing special at all and having all the titles on one guy coming in was really stupid. Nothing of note here but Lethal vs. Angle isnt too bad. Not a bad show at all, but really nothing that Ill ever want to see again.