Look at that picture. No, stop looking at this paragraph. I want you to really look at that picture. It's okay. I can wait. You given it a nice, thorough gander? Good. Now what's wrong with it? Well that's obvious: Jack Swagger is the World Heavyweight Champion. It's disgusting, isn't it? I know you smarky types tend to be wild about words like "honour," and "legacy," and "deserving." And a photo like this probably makes you vomit in your mouth. Yes, we've all heard Jack Swagger speak. And while he's probably an intelligent person once you get to know him, the way he fumbles the ball verbally often leads me to think he's a high-functioning lobotomy survivor. You see that enthusiasm he has for push-ups and that battle he regularly wages with the English language? I knew a kid like that in high school. Nicest guy in the world. Really helped me find my way around a weight room. But I always knew that if he were to achieve his dream of being a world champ in the WWE, he'd have to overcome some serious obstacles. And Jack Swagger has done just that. Austin never had to win those battles. Hogan never had to win those battles. And while my knowledge of the old school is lacking, I think that Gelgarin would tell us all that Thesz never had to win those battles. Swagger is the ultimate underdog, a man who made it farther than he ever should in life (although really, he did that when he made if past the fourth grade; lol, Oklahoma). Want to upset the establish order? Then let's put one more accomplishment under Swagger's belt: WrestleZone Tournament winner.
Sure, that entire paragraph could have been about Scott Steiner (okay, maybe not the aside about Oklahoma...). But it wasn't. Because Swagger caught the Double Whammy by being Bland-As-Hell to boot. And yet there have been times where the man still overcame that and got nuclear, World Championship level heel heat that he had no right to be receiving. Steiner getting that kind of reaction doesn't seem so bizarre. But anyone other than a speech therapist giving Jack Swagger any sort of attention just seems so foreign and unnatural. He's achieved the impossible. Surely he's to be rewarded for it.
Swagger for WZT2012 Winner
