'Maru and friends' thread of randomness

[LilacFray]

I'm sorry but it is Historical fiction. I can't change the History part

which part?

Write a story that revolves around Stalin then!

 

[Hyorinmaru]

Write a story that revolves around Stalin then!

i might

you can thank Redskul for the sig.

 

[LilacFray]

i might

Might? Okay.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

Might? Okay.

that's the best I can do. If a story idea hits me that involves Stalin I'll do it, if it doesn't I won't

 

[¡Roján!]

How will you get banned? It's only literature, and as long as you don't post it with pictures, we're fine. Come on, don't be such a wanker.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

you have to be over 18 to read it and we have a lot of under age people who post here.

The answer is and always will be no

 

[¡Roján!]

Da fuck?! You don't have to be 18 to read anything, you tit. Freedom of speech and that, yeah?

 

[Hyorinmaru]

you wanna read it so bad get KB or Sly to come in here to say it's ok.

 

[The Crock]

Or you could just let him read it privately?

 

[¡Roján!]

PM me it, you witch.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

That's an option and because he's been good to me lately I'll consider it

 

[Hyorinmaru]

PM me it, you witch.

Send me your E-mail address and I'll send it to you in the promise you will not tell anyone what it's about

 

[¡Roján!]

Okay, I've repped you my email adress.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

sent

please don't make me regret it

 

[¡Roján!]

Few comments:

There are far too many spelling mistakes.
It all happens to suddenly.
Is she from Newcastle?
She talks like she's a primary school teacher.
Third person would be more interesting.
Your name is Cory

But, apart from that, surprisingly good. You actually described the sex pretty well.

 

[Lee]

Could be worse, could be glasweigan.

 

[¡Roján!]

Could be worse, could be glasweigan.

Aye a ken. And, I just raise the point because every single time the lass spoke, she ended the sentence with pet.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

Few comments:

There are far too many spelling mistakes.

I know. A friend said she would edit it for me.

It all happens to suddenly.

How so

Is she from Newcastle?

no

She talks like she's a primary school teacher.

That's how Domme's talk

Third person would be more interesting.

Interesting maybe but I can't really write very well in third person

Your name is Cory

Did I use my real name in there?

But, apart from that, surprisingly good. You actually described the sex pretty well.

Thank you

 

[Hyorinmaru]

Aye a ken. And, I just raise the point because every single time the lass spoke, she ended the sentence with pet.

It's a BDSM story. I'm surprised you didn't pick up on that

 

[Lee]

But pet doesn't mean you're a dog, it's a term of endearment short for petal. Get with the times.

 

[¡Roján!]

I know. A friend said she would edit it for me.

Nice.

How so

There's no real build-up to the scene.

no

She should be.

That's how Domme's talk

She talks like she works at Buckingham Palace and is about to offer me tea and scones. She's far too polite and educated. Where's the dirty talk?

Interesting maybe but I can't really write very well in third person

Practice makes perfect.

Did I use my real name in there?

I saw your email adress and made assumptions.

Thank you

No problem.

It's a BDSM story. I'm surprised you didn't pick up on that

Yes, but pet? Other words such as bitch, hoe, skank com to mind.

 

[Hyorinmaru]

She talks like she works at Buckingham Palace and is about to offer me tea and scones. She's far too polite and educated. Where's the dirty talk?

It's coming

Practice makes perfect.

my novel will be in third person

I saw your email adress and made assumptions.

oh

Yes, but pet? Other words such as bitch, hoe, skank com to mind.

The main character is a guy so none of those words makes sense. Also the main character is based on me and the Domme a friend of mine and I like pet

 

[¡Roján!]

The main character is a guy so none of those words makes sense. Also the main character is based on me and the Domme a friend of mine and I like pet

''Come here, you little bitch'' doesn't work for a guy?!

 

[Hyorinmaru]

It does but I like Pet better. There's romance as well as just sex so Bitch doesn't work in this story. A future story Yes but not this one

 

[¡Roján!]

FFS, PET MAKES ZERO SENSE!

It makes me think the dominatrix is a brooding young girl in the English countryside prancing around picking flowers in Summer.