Scene opens in an unfamiliar backstage dressing room. Showtime David Cougar is alone in the room talking on his cell phone. He is dressed in his usual stylish suit with EurAsian title hung over his shoulder.
Cougar: Trent, Trent. Why the hell are we here?... Yeah I know WZCW studios is being used right no, producing titantrons and videos for all the wrestlers and their promos. I mean why am I here? I outdraw this guy on a night by night basis. Hell Zander TV would get more web hits than this guys weblogs.... Yeah I know we booked this months ago but its not the same... Conan wouldve been much better.
Stagehand: 5 minutes Mr. Cougar.
And the worst of it all is this isnt even a live show. Pre-taping all his shows during the Olympics so his editors can edit out his bad jokes. The director told me I have to go on stage without my EurAsian title because I could lose it by the time this episode airs. The nerve of that little piss ass..... uh huh..... okay, well Im going to get this piece of crap over with. I call you when Im leaving.
David hangs up the phone and walks towards his room dresser. He pulls out a large ziplock back and slides his EurAsian belt inside it. He opens the door and the stage hand is waiting outside. He hands the belt over to the stagehand.
If anything at all happens to my belt, Im going to do to you what I did to Ace David. Do you know what I did to Ace David?
The stagehand nods slowly.
Well Ace didnt see it coming, and neither will you if anything happens to my belt. We clear? Ohhh were crystal clear.
David slaps the stage hands shoulder and walks away. The stagehand looks slightly frightened.
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Announcer: ...its the Tonight Show!
Leno: Hello welcome back. Now our next guest comes from the world of professional wresting. He is a star in the promotion WZCW and, ironically enough, hes also a host of his own variety talk show, hehehe, so youd better look out. Haha, but in all seriousness, Showtime David Cougar everybody.
Showtime David Cougar makes his way out onto the stage. He shakes hands with Jay and takes a seat beside him.
Welcome to The Tonight Show Showtime.
Thank you. I guess welcome back as well Jay.
I guess so haha.
So tell me Jay. Does it seem kinda weird sitting behind a desk again. You know, after you stunned the world by having a new talk show without a desk in front of you.
No no I dont think so.
Hmm, your right. Nobody watched it so nobody was stunned.
Hehehe, I havent heard a million of those.
Youre right. Something fresh. Jay, is it because you missed having a desk that you decided you wanted The Tonight Show back.
No I didnt miss the desk.
Is that cause you didnt watch the show either... (audience laugh)... and didnt know there wasnt a desk out front.
Hehe, well I did have more leg room without one.
So why dont you get rid of the desk for The Tonight Show?
Because it came with The Tonight Show.
Huh, funny, I always thought it was the Leno that came with The Tonight Show.
Audience bursts out laughing and applauds.
You fancy yourself a funny guy. I hear you have your own talk show there David.
Save your breath there Jay, Im not going sign with NBC.
Hehe, no I wanted to ask you about your process.
Steal my ideas?
Only shows, haha, what would you say are your inspirations?
Myself mainly..... Ill readily admit I dont go for the easy jokes and constant chuckles Jay, my show is more of a self-platform. A show for me to be viewed for all the viewers to see, something you havent had much in a while. The secret, live shows, but I guess we all know why theyre pre-taping your shows this week Jay. To edit in some good material.
Audience laughs and Jay taps the table.
Hehe. So tell me... after your hellacious bout at your companies big Pay-Per-View, Kingdom Come, how are you feeling after losing the EurAsian title to the new champion, Big Dave.
Hey wait. That match has yet to happen.
Man, Big Dave mustve knocked you more silly than I thought for you not to even remember. Hey, did you hear Tiger Woods has been cheating on his wife. Of course you didn't, you can't remember.
Audience laughs and Jay places a hand over the mic.
Like you said, its a taped show. Get the laughs in. We got to play it from every angle. You came out with some good material, but if your gonna use this to bash my head in, I will bite back. This jaw aint just for looks you know. So are we going to do this like professionals.
Showtime smirks and chuckles. He nods his head in agreement and they continue.
Yea Jay, I guess I could say I was seeing more stars than the Haiti relief tribute song. But thats what happens when you have to deal with not just Dave but the rest of his rWo buddies. I showed them the megashow before Kingdom Come when I broke one of their now former members Ace Davids neck that I meant business and at Kingdom Come I did the same to Big Dave right before I was jumped and beaten down hard enough so they could lay that limp body over me. For anyone who has yet to see the match, I have brought footage from that show Jay.
Alright, lets roll to clip.
Showtime and Jay turn around pretending to look at a clip and Jay puts a hand over the mic again.
Is this written in the script?
You better believe it Jay.
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Applause is heard and Showtime David Cougar emerges from the stage to backstage. The stagehand is waiting to meet him with his EurAsian title belt. David rips it from the stagehands hands and starts marching back to his dressing room. He takes the belt out of the ziplock and throws it over his shoulder. He enters the dressing room, turns around, and takes the camera from the cameraman. He places it on a table in the room and pours himself 2 shots of scotch. He takes off the suit jacket, takes a sip from his drink and speaks.
Hmmm, that Jay. He is kinda funny actually. But its a shame his whole life is a charade. These people and their dependence in others. Jay has shown that he is nothing without The Tonight Show. His departure from late night into prime time stank more than Ashleigh FalKon did in the ring. So he did what anybody else would and ran back to that same dependence for hope to regain some of what he had lost. My opponent at Kingdom Come suffers from a similar dependence, the dependence of another, and unlike Mr. Leno, he can never regain that dependence because I have taken it away from him, and I didnt do it for pain or pleasure or revenge or anything my opponent thinks. Quite simply I did it for the show, and my opponent will have to deal with the consequences of my actions when we meet. My opponents name, oddly enough, is the same as mine and his befallen friends name, Dave, Big Dave he likes to call himself.
Showtime take another sip of his drink and sits in front of the camera, EurAsian title hung over his shoulder.
Hello Big Dave. Dave Im sure that you are sitting down watching this, just like Im sure that the entire WZCW roster is watching this, just like Im sure that the entire world is witnessing this, so I will speak directly to you then. Pretty freaky huh, coming from your TV. But let me remind everyone first that this match is more than just a title bout between 2 young and almost equally talented Daves. No Dave, you and I, we have long history together.
Ah yes I remember Meltdown 20, our contract battle royale. I had already wrestled one with this company so far and was supremely confident that I would win that night. I came across you Dave, throwing fists off in the corner and trying to remain as unnoticed as possible. I didnt think at the time you stood anymore of a chance than say Christian Battlez or Alex Christopher. You were but another opponent that I would go through to get my contract. And when the match began I did just what I expected to, eliminating opponent after opponent. Finally it came down to four men, and as I had you over the ropes, hanging on for dear life as I kicked away at you, the bell rang and your career spared. I didnt think anything at the time about how your survival would affect my career, but I did ponder about how our paths would cross. As I made my way backstage, I found out that would come much sooner than later, one Meltdown later to be exact.
David downs the rest of his scotch and places it off camera.
Do you know what the difference is between mine and your career is Big Dave? The thing that lead us each down our own exciting path. The thing that determined the shape that our careers have taken so far... a reliable partner. Now I know that I will be accused for pointing the finger here, but it is well documented that my partner was seldom seen and unheard from around here. TradeMark sucked more than a camel on drinking day. So how dare you then call your partner, your best friend Ace David... a weakness, when it was he who was the reason for all of your success. After your cheap boot to the eye, it was him who beat me down and pinned me at Meltdown 21 and at Unscripted after you were time and time again unsuccessful in pinning me it was Ace who finished up the job and pinned me. Ace was the one who pinned Second Coming to retain the titles and Ace and Ricky were the ones who were always there for you, so that you could be a success. Had I been teaming with Ace, I may have achieved the same tag team success that you yourself had, while you would probably have fallen to the way side without reliable partners to secure your victories.
As for me though, I quickly decided that if I wanted to get anywhere in this company that I needed to needed to be cut-throat and ruthless with anyone who stands in my way and anyone who wishes to align themselves with me. I like to think that Ive been pretty successful so far with that strategy. I am a former Mayhem Champion, never been pinned to lose that belt, and the current and greatest EurAsian champion to ever walk the planet. I have the record for the fastest victory in WZCW, the most savage and one-sided Mayhem victory, and have beaten Lars Reidar in a best 2 out of 3 matches. I have beaten champions and contenders and just about everything else this company has put before me. I am also responsible for destroying the minds and subsequently ending the careers of Marcus Chambers, Milenko, Chief Anoki, and Drake Callahan, and now I can proudly add Ace David to that equation. Champions, men with potential, all of it dashed in an instant when they stepped inside the ring with me and I warn you Big Dave, at Kingdom Come our match will be no different, and the risk that your career will follow the same path as theirs, is still very much real.
Showtime pauses and smiles for a minute, perhaps imagining the same predicament happening to Big Dave that happened to many of his opponents.
But I dont want to scare you yet, no, I want to look, I want to watch, I want to know why it is you think that you are even worthy of a title match verse me on the biggest stage in WZCW. What have you done in this company when you werent riding the coat tails of your rWo allies? Well I watched the TV, as many of you are doing right now, and studied your matches. We know it was Ace and Ricky who picked up all the important victories for your team, but what sort of individual success have you obtained. In the time that I was winning 2 titles and securing my place among the WZCW elite, your victories came over the likes of Murfish and Zander Young. 2 released wrestlers and quite possible the worst Elite-X champion this company has ever had.
Then you were placed in the EurAsian league where you beat the likes of Beckford, Rush, Hammond, and Blade. You beat the youngest and most inexperienced, and the oldest and slowest wrestlers we have. You beat 2 guys that I handed loses too with ease, and 4 guys who have NEVER held a title in this company. As someone who has held a belt before, you know of the pure ecstasy one feels in holding the belt. Those men you defeated have NEVER experienced that pure joy before and subsequently didnt understand why you and I fight so hard to get it back and hold on to it. No, you didnt defeat anybody that I myself could not have defeated. All you did was beat a group of wrestlers, handpicked by management, to be my next victim at Kingdom Come. Dave, be aware that you are no longer in the EurAsian league, you are now standing in MY league and not a damn wrestler in WZCW is able to keep up with me in MY league.
David takes the belt off his shoulder and holds it in front of the camera.
Because THIS is what I live for and THIS is what I die for. To defend this belt in the name of all of the super continent EurAsia and for everybody else whos cultures began from the great dynasties of these civilizations. I was born and bred of one, A Canadian, a son of the British Commonwealth, and have every right to hold and defend this belt in the name of all those people who fought for my freedom. I continue to cross boarders each and every week as more and more of the world begins to watch my show and understand that I am the face of professional wrestling and that I am the greatest champion that they could ever hope for. Because I dont beat, and injure, and finish peoples careers for jest, for blood, for revenge. I do it... for business...
That no man be unaware, when I step into the ring with you I will do whatever it takes to be victorious. I will step on you, rip the ear off the side of your head, and slap you in the face with it if thats what it takes to beat you. I am a fighting champion, looking for the biggest challenge that is out there so that I can deliver the biggest show my audience has ever seen. I told Blade, I told Lars, I told everybody in the back at Lethal Lottery, to bring everything that had to the ring and they did, and I turned them around and brought them all to their knees. I expect nothing short of the best from you Dave, and if your not careful, you might end up sharing a room with Ace.
I do not apologize for what I did to your partner, your friend Ace David. As I said, it was business, but not just any business... good business. You see Dave, Im taking a gamble. Where Leno faltered when he lost The Tonight Show, we will see if the same happens to you without the man responsible for your success. I for one am hoping for the opposite to happen; that what you say is true, that a new Big Dave as emerged and one that will fight tooth and nail for his friend, for his country, and for himself. I am hoping that this has awakened a better man inside of you, because that is exactly what I am looking for, the fight of my life. And Dave let it be known that I will fight back as well, with all of my heart and soul and everything that I have and no matter who walks out of Kingdom Come victorious, both you and I will remain the present and future of WZCW for years to come. Dave, I am giving you a chance to finish what we both started. Neither one of us holds a true pinfall, a true victory over the other, and now with Kingdom Come fast approaching, we will see from the class of 4 who won their contracts at Meltdown 20, which one of us that are left is truly the class of their graduation. One year in the making, 3 seconds and itll be over. Big Dave, better break a neck, thatll be the only way youll ever keep me down at Kingdom Come.
