Why won’t you look at me, Steven? Why won’t you listen to what I have to say? You’ve closed yourself off in your study and refused any type of human contact. I knew what he was going through, as we both lost big matches that night. But unlike him I wasn’t trying to shut myself off. I wanted him to comfort me, and to hold me, and tell me everything was going to be alright, but instead he continued to look at me with those hollow eyes that held no real emotion at all.
“My empire has crumbled into dirt. I am no more worthy to be a king than I am to be a paupers witness to the fall of my own glory.”
The negativity of his words that night echoed as I watched him fall into a slump that lasted for days. And there was nothing I could do for him but wait, and that stung. The uneasiness of being in the same room together, never uttering a word, was enough that our pain seemed to be tearing at each other. Every time he would get up and leave, and locked himself in his study. Many times I stood by that door and simply waited. I wasn’t expecting an invitation because I received none, and I never heard any sounds except for my own breaths because there were none. The single tear Steven shed for me wasn’t going to be wasted on his pride.
As a woman I could understand that. I felt my own pride disappear alongside my dream of becoming a future world champion and following in Steven’s footsteps; snuffed out by the second wind of a madman whose power I could not contain. Such ferocity in his attacks, that my body lost consciousness well before I surrendered my will. That was my weakness. Pain was only a word to me, and because of that my will had no limit, but my body did. I had to give credit to Barbosa for pushing me past that limit.
Dinner that evening wasn’t any different. Steven sat across from me at the large dining room as we sat and ate in silence. This “no contact” strike was driving me crazy, and as I picked at my food I decided to put an end to it.
“The food’s good, yes? The cook really outdid himself tonight.”
It was a small gesture, anything to spark even the simplest conversation, but Steven wasn’t budging. He shot me a disinterested glance and half grunted a reply. I sat and watched him eat when suddenly my blood began to boil. I gripped my fork tightly and rested my left arm on the table.
“I’m getting tired of you constantly ignoring me Steven. I know you suffered a huge loss at Kingdom Come, but so did I. I want us to move forward from this not backwards. Please at least tell me something that lets me know you aren’t going mad!”
He stopped and placed his fork on his plate. With a huff be began to get up but I wasn’t having any of it. I was determined to reach him, if only a little. I slammed my hand down on the table. Angrily I accused him of purposely trying to distance himself from me. Was it my fault for losing at Kingdom Come? Was our utopia destroyed because I couldn’t come through in the end? Did I disgust him because the faith he had placed in me didn’t bear fruit? I wanted an answer.
“It’s not any of that those things Celeste! I told you that your destiny was yours to make, but don’t you dare pretend like you understand what I’m going through. You merely lost the opportunity to be a champion, while I lost the greatest prize in the company! How could you possibly understand what it feels to lose something like that when you’ve never been a champion even once!”
Standing rigid I held firm. Mighty as his words were I refused to submit.
“But I understand what kind of man you are Steven, and even in your darkest hour my love for you has never faltered. I don’t care if you’re the world champion or not, our utopia will exist as long as we are together! Please abandon your pride and let me heal your wounds. There’s no need for you to bare your teeth at me any longer.”
He threw his hands up and laughed.
“I see through your ruse woman! Don’t you think I haven’t forgotten that it was you that helped me reach my goal in the first place? Just this once I wanted to accomplish something meaningful on my own. You whose accomplished nothing in her career expects me of all people just to abandon his honor and pride? Bah!”
He turned away from me as his words tore into me. The back and forth game we played whenever Steven emotions finally came out. Whether this was honestly or another front wasn’t something I was sure of at the moment, but his pain was evident. As quick as lightning I grabbed him by the shoulder and spun him around to face me. He eyes went wide as I raised my hand, but instead of striking him I placed my arms around him in a tight embrace.
I began to cry as tears of frustration rolled down my cheeks. This vulnerable, emotional side of me was one that only Steven was allowed to see. The kind of woman I was portrayed to be was cold on malicious, but on the inside I wore my heart on my sleeve. Slowly and ever so slightly I felt Steven’s anger and frustration beginning to melt as he placed his arms around me. And here in laid the power of our bonds. The love we shared was indeed greater than any championship.
Steven wasn’t the type of man that accepted handouts. Everything that he had ever accomplished was through his hands and his hands alone. The only reason why he accepted help from me was that he loved me. That passionate flame that had so violently and unfairly ripped from both our lives had caused both of us to become lost in the abyss of depression where simple things like honor and pride were no longer valid. And the flame we had lit together had guided us to where we were now.
“Maybe it’s because you’re a man, and I don’t understand machismo, but I have my pride as a woman and as a wrestler, and when I lost I submitted myself to you because I wanted you to comfort me, but you never did. All you did was shut me out and wallowed in your own self pity, and I did too. But we need to move forward now, together!”
I dried my tears and glanced up into his eyes, and for the first time in days I saw the haze beginning to lift. Now it was his turn to apologize. The embrace of a lover’s warmth was something he had taken for granted until it was snuffed out, and the ladder wasn’t worth climbing anymore. But when he was able to climb it anyway, thanks to me that was when his honor had returned. Even though that honor was shattered, he still felt the warmth I had given him. He felt like a fool for shutting me out and agreed that we had to move forward.
“Let’s climb the ladder again, Steven; just the two of us this time. If I propel you to the champion again, or you propel me, I don’t care as long as we’re together. As a woman with pride how can I stand tall without the support of a man that loves me like you do?”
There it was; the first smile I had seen from him in days. It was refreshing to see him finally coming out of his shell. Neither of us felt like finishing dinner, and as the servants cleared the table we retired to the living room. The painting that he had bought me months ago still hung above the fireplace, and looking at it had always given me peace. Steven grabbed some glasses and a bottle of red wine from the cabinet as we sat on the couch. He poured a glass for me, and then one for himself, as we toasted new beginnings.
The ladder to the top wasn’t going to be easy to climb, and already the first rung was going to make it that much harder for the both of us to move forward. Steven had been tasked with fighting Saboteur, a man that I knew quite well, and unlike us, he had a picture perfect Kingdom Come… well, almost picture perfect. The retirement of Action Saxton was no doubt laying heavily on his mind, and it was a weakness Steven could exploit quite well. The interesting question was what was going to happen to the tag championships know that Saxton had retired? Surely Saboteur couldn’t defend them himself, and he’d have to bring in another partner to help him. The whole situation intrigued me greatly.
On the other hand I had been tasked with facing Titus. Like me, the hero had faced defeat, but his loss had to have been bitter considering Christopher had been a rival for a long time leading up to Kingdom Come, rather than just an opponent of circumstance like Barbosa had been for me. Surely Titus was going to be gunning for me much harder than I was going to be gunning for him. Surely he had more to prove to the rest of the locker room than I did.
“Titus is the first obstacle that I have to climb, a former world champion like you, he’s sat on that throne twice before in the past. But now he’s vulnerable. I can sense his shame like a shark sensing a drop of blood in the ocean. And I’m going to narrow in on it and capitalize. What do I have to prove that Titus doesn’t? I am no hero, I am not idolized by millions of people, and people do not look up to me. I didn’t let anyone but myself down when I lost at Kingdom Come. But when Titus lost not only did he let himself down, but all the fans as well. He is a seal thrashing about in the endless ocean of pain and misery, and like a shark that has sensed his blood I’m closing in on the kill.”
I took a sip of wine and placed the glass back down on the table. I had already gotten over my pain of losing my chance to sit on the throne that Steven and Titus had sat on before, but what was really important to me, my relationship with Steven had never faltered. Could Titus say the same thing, was it really that easy for him to pick himself up after a grueling loss? That was the problem with heroes; once they fell they no longer held any value as a symbol and simple simply became a relic. And that’s exactly what Titus was… a relic.
“There won’t be any redemption for Titus on Ascension. That ship sailed the moment Christopher pinned his shoulder to the mat. The past has caught up with him after all these years, and unlike me, he no longer has a place anymore. A worthless hero that can’t defeat evil has no business trying to climb back to the heights I aspire to. I will crush him as you make an example out of Saboteur, and we’ll make that first step together.”
Steven nodded and finished off his wine. He placed his glass on the table next to mine. A clear and vibrant future was in front of us, and this time we weren’t going to make the same mistakes again. Let the sins we committed the last few months never haunt us again. That was the one promise I could make. We turned as a knock from the butler, the head of Steven’s staff, caught us off guard. He stepped forward and handed Steven a letter addressed to the house from the WZCW Board of Directors. He excused himself as Steven opened the letter and began to read. I watched him as he began to cackle, which slowly became laughter. He handed the letter over to me as I began to read the text.
I couldn’t believe my eyes, Sam Smith was retiring? There was an open spot in the tournament? And I was one of the superstars chosen to compete? Needless to say I was astonished. Initially I had been extremely bummed about not being chosen as one of the original participants, which came as a great shock to many in the back. I had been a heavy favorite to win for quite some time before the official brackets were announced, which flattered me because it meant that most wrestlers were still intimidated by me. And this letter was proof of the second chance that I was receiving, it was like fate!
Some of the names I’d potentially be facing consisted of low carders like Angel, Dustin Hunter, and Jimmy Flynn, as well as middle carders like Grand Mystique. There were a few other returning superstars that had never been a threat to me… and WZCW brass expected them to take me on? I’d slaughter all of them. It took what many considered the second best man in the company currently to stop me at Kingdom Come, and yet they expected these peons to outlast me?
“So what do you think? You’re getting that second chance to sit on that throne and make your dreams come true.”
I shook my head, folded up the paper, and set it aside. I remained silent for a few seconds, as Steven watched me with interest.
“I should be happy about this, but really I’m not. To be honest Steven, I don’t want this anymore.”
He did a double take and shot me a deadpanned look, but I was being serious. Even though I had a great shot at winning, I no longer wanted to pursue the world championship because doing so required me to leave his side. I wanted to climb the ladder back to the top together with him. I didn’t want to do it on my own just yet, not because I didn’t have the confidence, but because that’s not where my heart was. My heart belonged next to him, and that’s where I wanted to stay.
“Maybe someday in the future I will try to take that throne for myself, but not right now. I don’t want to ascend the ladder without you.”
Steven smiled and called me a fool for wanting to pass up this opportunity, but I was his fool, and that’s all that mattered to me. Let someone else have this moment. Later down the road perhaps I’d be the one to ruin that moment for them. And for that I’d always be lurking in the shadows.
