Apocalypse: Titus Avison(c) vs. S.H.I.T. - EurAsian Title

[Richard Blonoff]

Deadline is Tuesday, January 19th at 11:59PM. Extensions available upon request.

 

[Lee]

The stage is set for the 73rd Golden Globes where Ricky Gervais has shuffled off awkwardly after making a Caitlyn Jenner joke. It's the award for Best Performance in a Motion Picture and entering the stage is Titus Avison.

The crowd is applauding. Titus stands behind the podium holding an envelope. On the podium is the Golden Globe itself.

Titus: I always love the Golden Globes. It gets you ready for Oscar season. It lets you know who will be the crème of the crop in this wonderful world.

As a five time Oscar winner it is my honour to present the Golden Globe for Best Performance in a Motion Picture. The nominees are:

Eddie Redmayne as Lili Elbe. It'll be a bit awkward if you win this after Ricky's earlier comments. In all seriousness though Eddie, I love you man. I can't wait for Fantastic Beasts to come out.

The crowd laughs as the camera shows Eddie who gives a thumbs up.

Titus: For his role as Dr. Bennet Omalu in the movie Concussion it's Will Smith. Let's hope you win this because we all know why you won't win an Oscar.

Off stage you can hear Ricky Gervais curse because he wanted to make that joke. The crowd give an awkward reaction and Jada Pinkett Smith does not seem happy but Will throws it off laughing.

Titus: Lastly we have a man who starred in The Revenant. A man who has two other Golden Globes. It's Leonardo DiCaprio.

A pan of the crowd shows an unhappy looking Lady Gaga but Leo is laughing. The crowd goes crazy as Titus Avison announces DiCaprio as the winner. DiCaprio makes his way to the stage.

Titus: It's so great to see a fellow Oscar winner up here with me!

Leo: I um...I've never won an Oscar.

Titus: You never won an Oscar? Not for Titanic? The Aviator? Blood Diamond? Wolf on Wall Street? The Beach? The Departed? Shutter Island? Inception?

Leo: No Avison, I have not.

Titus: Wow you must really hate me. I've somehow won five and my main job at the minute is a wrestler. You must despise me every time people ask you about your lack of Academy Awards. Wow.

Some of the crowd laugh but most start to boo.

Titus: Any way Leo, enjoy your speech. I'll see you the back end of February.

Titus hands the award over to Leo who looks enraged. Titus holds both hands up in the air in a peace like symbol and skips off stage with a spring in his step.
The scene quickly cuts to some loud carnival like music as we see an attractive Brazilian TV host. It's Andressa Soares. You may recognise her from the Youtube video of the Brazilian presenter who did the twerking on her show. If you don't, that's where she's from.

Soares: It has been quite the week for you Titus. Starting with the Golden Globes and ending with WZCW Apocalypse.

Titus: A normal week in the life of Titus Avison. You've also missed out four autograph sessions, three talk shows, two visits of schools and a tourist visit of Christ the Redeemer. I love that he poses like William Teach used to. So all in all my week has been very pleasant.

The crowd laugh. The camera is focussed on the two as they are sat behind a rather high desk, the sort you'd usually see on Fox News type shows. Brazil tends to use them for their talk shows.

Soares: You were not very pleasant to Mr. DiCaprio though.

An 80's audience style oooooh is heard as Titus is thrown right into the spot.

Titus: Ha! Why should I be? He's all over the news as someone who is going to win an Oscar. Again. This is him every couple of years and it's getting laborious. I've won five and he has nothing. The Oscar is the primary award yet the Golden Globe, it's not.

Soares: Yet in WZCW you don't have the top prize. You have the EurAsian championship.

Titus leans back in his chair, laughs and pulls out his championship from under the desk. He puts it over his shoulder with a smirk.

Titus: Andressa, sweetie that's a rather ignorant thing to say. The EurAsian championship is WZCW's top prize. Who is the World Champion? It's someone I have defeated. Who's he facing? Someone I have defeated. The Zeus and Daggershield feud can continue all it wants because people want this.

Titus taps his belt and gives a great grin to the audience. They are silent hanging on his every word, you could hear a pin drop.

Titus: S.H.I.T. Noah. Veejay. They're the ones who have admitted it. I want to wish Veejay the best of luck on Sunday actually. We had a great match last week and he stuck his neck out and took his chance. I applaud someone who does that. He deserves a match where I give everything so I look forward to him defeating Noah Ryder. I then guarantee 100% from me.

Soares: So what about Noah Ryder? He is King for a Day after all.

Titus: He won't be after Apocalypse so does it really matter? I'll deal with him in due course. No one touches my belongings and gets away with it. He's made it personal and he will pay.

Soares: Before that you have S.H.I.T. Can you defeat him? Lets find out in...

Spoiler

The crowd join chanting in as the really poor graphics spin on the screen. Both Titus and Soares stand up and walk towards the middle of the room. There are three doors.

Soares: First up you must face in a race, that which is behind door number one.

Door number one opens and it is R2-D2. The crowd go crazy as it beeps on over. Titus is read to start the race but it explodes like the R4 unit in Episode IV. Titus is the winner.

Soares: That wasn't expected. Next up is an arm wrestling match for door two.

A stage hand runs on with a table and two chairs as door two opens. It's Rosie Jetson, Titus Avison looks to the camera as if he can't believe what he's doing. The crowd cheer as Rosie makes its way to the table.

Titus Avison, obviously, defeats Rosie with ease. He celebrates like he has just won the world cup and rubs his hands with glee as door three opens without Andressa, introducing. Behind is a cardboard robot stood there with a mean grin on the face.

Titus runs straight over, spears the robot to the floor. He starts stamping on the robot as a few security guards run over. Titus fights them off but before he can enact any further pain on the robot the head is removed. It's not S.H.I.T. It's just some random intern from the show.

Titus is livid and looks directly to the camera. He is shouting with an intensity not seen in a long time.

Titus: Not what you were expecting eh? You were expecting me to prance around with Titus' Urban Robotic Device? Well S.H.I.T. This is a whole different ballgame. You brought Noah Ryder into this and you have let people do your bidding. You needed him to smash up my locker room. You couldn't do it yourself.

You're no Doctor Zeus, don't try to be. John Doe showed you that on Meltdown. Heck Eve Taylor showed you that the week before. Is your programming in need of an upgrade? Frankly you're a shell of what you used to be.

The EurAsian belt is staying with me and there's nothing you can do about it. You bring your Noah Ryder's, William Teaches, Doug Crashins or Alex Bowens. It makes no difference. In that ring I am in charge. At Apocalypse you will be Slaughtered a Homicide. I guarantee it. I'm Titus Avison. Your EurAsian champion and Apocalypse will mark your end.

The camera cuts as the show goes to commercial. There's an advert for their next guest but you don't care for that.

 

[Richard Blonoff]

Miko's RP.

The figure sat huddled over, clasped in his hands a large, square object, staring back at him with nothing but malice.

"Is this what others see, when they look at me?"

The red eyes bore into your insides, the mouth contorted in a near feral snarl. No hint of anything other than the destruction it wants to bring down on you, a face fitting its wearer.

---------- --------------------------- ------------

"Possibly our greatest creation!" Uttered the annoying man with the annoying Adams apple, like a proud school teacher. "A creation made solely for fighting, for destruction, and is there anyone better?"

He is addressing what looks like a bunch of cadets, all looking very formal, all inspecting the Machine, although looking less impressed that the annoying man at the spectacle. One in particular, who must stand at about 7 feet tall, was actually smirking. S.H.I.T regarded them all impassively. The annoying man made his way over to the Machine, and in one swift movement delivered a gut punch, and succeeded only in hurting his own hand. Wincing and shaking his hand, he grins at the assembled crowd, before moving on, possibly to the next exhibit The others follow him, except for the 7 foot tall smirking man, he just stood and watched. Smirking. S.H.I.T returned the stare, impassively.

Eventually the large man saunters over, standing at a foot taller than the Machine, he towers over S.H.I.T., never taking his eyes off of the Robot. Not saying a word, he clenches his fist and looks to deliver a much harder gut punch, he pulls his arm back and S.H.I.T braces for impact.

"Ryan!" Quickly the huge man lowers his fist, as it appears that the annoying man had noticed his absence. "What are you doing over there?"

The one called Ryan takes a moment before answering, "just checking out this powerful destructive force," he replied, failing to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

-------- ------------------ --------

The figure stares into the eyes, which stare back, as though they have a life of their own, as though it doesn't matter if there is anything behind them.

"Is this what they see? Or do they see what the large man saw?" The memory of his smirk was ingrained in the figures skull, but the figure didn't know if that inspired it or not. If it even really cared beyond a token effort to hold onto losing ground.

"What does it matter, when none of it matters at all?"

"The memory matters, the memory of what lives on!"

"Nothing will live on, we are all just dust in the wind."

"Legacies never die!"

"Everything dies!"

"Even us?"

"Even us."

The voices seem to clash, with a metallic quality in both, an unfeeling sense of purpose in one, and purposelesness in the other. Though it is hard to tell which from which.

So for what purpose do we exist?

"I do not know."

"To destroy all those that others have, want to gave and have created?

"Once that was the case, yes."

"And now?"

"And now I do not know"

The figure lifts its head and places it where it belongs, and stands up. How can a creature with no purpose hope to succeed? I do not know.

It flexes, getting ready for its next contest.

I shall attempt to take everything Titus holds dear, why or for who, I do not know.

I shall continue as I am, for it is all I understand.