A Brief Statement From Hunter S. Kravinoff's Publicist

[Coco]

Hunter S. Kravinoff looks forward to his match with Phoenix on Ascension. Matching up against a man with such a humble upbringing and colorful, adventure-seeking tenancies is a true pleasure for the Ugandan Wild Man. Mr. Kravinoff anticipates a challenging and competitive bout and hopes that the best man will win. Finally, Mr. Kravinoff would like to send out his well-wishes to the people of Israel and all those suffering from AIDS.

I will now be taking questions on behalf of Mr. Kravinoff. In hopes of establishing a rich, fulfilling relationship going forward with you, the WZCW fans, Mr. Kravinoff and I would like to know what you're interested in hearing from him about. Please keep the questions brief so we can get to everybody. Thank-you, and God bless America!

 

[ABMorales787]

Stan Lee. What are Hunter's thoughts on him using a character similar to him on his comics?

 

[Coco]

Any similarities between Mr. Kravinoff and the Wade Wilson character are pure coincidence. Next question.

 

[DirtyJosé]

Raynbow Aly here from San Francisco CA. Why does Hunter Kravinoff hate animals? Hunting is not cool and isn't very nice to nature; why doesn't Mr. Kravinoff try something more Earth friendly and peaceful, like enjoying patchuli incense, painting rainbows, or running a food co-op?

 

[Coco]

I thought we were turning these hippies around at the door. *clears throat*

Mr. Kravinoff does NOT hate animals. He pays them respect by providing them with an honorable death in battle. Mr. Kravinoff is not yet aware of the existence of patchuli incense. From a philosophical standpoint, Mr. Kravinoff believes the concept of peace is a sham, but one of the nicer ones. Next question.

 

[Барбоса]

Barbosa, Daily Bugle... no... err... Daily Planet... no, where are we from again?

Gimme control of this and I will ask our questions...

Ahem... Barbosa and we are from none of your damn business. We have three questions for you, Kravinoff.

1) Should you make it passed Phoenix (and let's face it, why shouldn't you), how do you feel about being caged at Kingdom Come?

2) Which of your potential opponents in the King For A Day Match do you think will be your biggest threat?

3) And why are we?

 

[Coco]

1) Although Mr. Kravinoff and I have yet to discuss the King For A Day match at length, my understanding is that my client knows no fear. I'm sure he'll be willing to discuss this further at a later date.

2) Mr. Kravinoff feels that all of his potential opponents in K-FAD are "heavy hitters," but maintains that he's the heaviest.

3) Why are we what?

Next question.

 

[FunKay the Inevitable]

Alan Butters, Crashin Movement Press Manager:

Have you been ducking the Crashin Movement deliberately or are you simply biding time Mr. Kravinoff?

 

[Coco]

"Duck" isn't a verb in Mr. Kravinoff's world. It's a victim. Next question.

 

[falconsault]

Nate Adams - ePWI

When exactly is it that Hunter Kravinoff will leave the comfort of his little fantasy world and join the rest of us in reality?

 

[Coco]

Mr. Kravinoff lives in the same world as the rest of you. He just sees things differently, similar to people with autism. If you can be tolerant of the autistic, you can also be tolerant of my client. Next question.