Your Favorite Christmas memory

LSN80

King Of The Ring
I tried to post this yesterday, and for some reason, it just did not work. Tis the season, eh?

Each day, I think our lives are so surrounded by negative things and attitudes that we forget the good. With Christmas coming only once a year, obviously, it's an exciting and stressful time of the year to get excited for, but it comes and goes much quicker then the preperation itself does. My hope is that despite the relative brevity of the holiday, great memories are made along the way. I know personally, there have been many years from childhood to becoming an adult that have stuck with me, in a positive fashion. Personally, there's one year above all that sticks out to me more then any other, and I hope all of you can say the same.

When I was 12, my family and I were moving into a slightly larger house, but one we would own, not rent. We didn't have much money at the time, and I remember, in the days before Christmas, my parents sitting the three of us down(myself, my twin sister, and my little sister), and explaining to us that they had only $25 dollars to spend on each of us. Many of my friends, I knew, were getting video games that cost more then that, and others were getting entire consoles! As a 31 one year old, I can now understand and appreciate my parent's situation, but the selfish 12 year old I was could not.

So what made this Christmas so great? The effort my parents put into buying gifts. No, they didn't have much to spend, but they knew their kids well. Like no Christmas before or since, there wasn't a single item I didn't love that they bought us, including my dad producing one final gift, which was the new video game console at the time, with games, to be split between the three of us. He had a friend of a friend who worked for one of the major video game companies, and while my dad wasn't complaining, he shared with his friend his disapointment in not being able to get much for his kids. So his friend arranged it so that my dad got not only a 50% discount, but also, pay when he called.

It wasn't about the gits that made it such a great Christmas, it was the love my parents showed us that made it so special. Instead of using some of the Christmas money on things we needed, they used it to buy things we wanted, showing their thoughtfulness along the way. I remember exclaiming to my dad "This is the best Christmas ever", and to this day, it remains my favorite holiday. Even without money to layer extravegant kgifts on us, they made every effort possible to make it a special Christmas for us. Turns out, it worked.

What is your favorite Christmas memory? What made it so special?
 
Christmas of 1992 we had a big family reunion at my grandmother's house in Sweden. Nearly my entire side of the family lives over there with the exception of my parents, my sister, and myself. That was a very different Christmas. The good being that it was cool to meet some relatives I never had before, and that event remains the only time I have ever seen most of them. The bad being how COLD it was. We were in Sweden in December. Several degrees below zero, I hated that. We ended up never doing it again. My sister and I each have our own families now, and I don't really speak to my side of the family anymore.

Christmas of 1998 was another good one. Primarily due to a certain gift. Every single year I would immediately go after the gifts that I could tell due to their shape that they were video games, and show little interest in the random other gifts containing things I had not specifically asked for. That year my parents played a little trick on me by purposefully leaving one gift out until all the others were opened. I was a bit disappointed as I had specifically asked for a copy of "The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time". After everyone had opened their gifts my mother said oh wait there's still one more that I forgot. She came back out into the room with a Nintendo 64 game shaped gift, it was Zelda. I ended up pranking them back a few years later.

Christmas of 2002 was the closest we ever came to replicating the big family christmas that took place ten years before it. My parents, my grandmother, her then-boyfriend, my sister, her now-husband, three big dogs, and I all crammed together in what is now my parents' guest house trailer (we lived in it at the time) for Christmas. We had a pretty good time, and I pranked my parents back for their Zelda prank. There was always an inside joke in my family that if someone had no clue what their gift was, we would tell them "it's boots". I do not know the origin, but for as long as I could remember we would say that as a joke. So that year I took my father's actual boots, wrapped them up, and gave them to him as a gift. Everyone found it hilarious that someone actually got boots for once. I played a prank on my sister too by getting her a joke gift of wrapping up a top hat shaped christmas ornament inside a box within 10 other boxes. Watching her open box after box only for it to end up being a little green top hat that serves almost no purpose, in the end, had everyone laughing hysterically.

Christmas of 2006 remains my favorite christmas of all though. This was the year that I asked for nothing but giftcards from every single member of the family. Both parents, my sister, her now-husband, all of my grandparents, and from various people at school when we had decided to get each other gifts. I ended up with $200+ worth of giftcards. Walking into the local music store and buying a mountain of CD's was an awesome moment I'll never forget.

The one common theme of every single Christmas for me though is watching Chevy Chase's Christmas Vacation. No matter how good or bad Christmas is that year (I have had some AWFUL ones), no matter where it takes place (Sweden, Texas, Missouri, California, and more) that year, every single year for the past 20 years I have watched this movie on Christmas Eve. It's not Christmas without it.
 
I don't really have a single one that stands out as the best or favorite. Just some traditions and stuff that happened along the way.

When my grandparents were alive I enjoyed going to see my grandparents on my mom's side. I had a cousin that I really looked up to and I really enjoyed seeing him because I only got to see him on Christmas. Christmas was also the only time I would get to see my grandparents on my mom's side so I usually looked forward to that.

After my grandma died and her husband didn't want to see any of us anymore we started getting together at my aunt and uncle's house. My biological grandfather would always come visit with us. He would play darts with some of us and my brother and I would always play pool.

My dad's family would get together so we could all spend time with my grandma. That wasn't a huge deal to me because I got to see that grandma all the time.I still looked forward to it though because any excuse to see my grandma was a good excuse for me as a kid. I did enjoy it though because I knew it meant I would get to see my dad. Also my uncle made some awesome meatballs that I would always eat a ton of.

In the vein of what Dagger said about pranks. One year my brother gave me a gift and I opened it and it was just a box of rocks. He just sat there and watched me open it and react and everything and waited a while and then finally gave me my real present.

Also something that stuck with me was the year my brother took me out and taught me how to change the oil in my mom's car. I was only 10 and I didn't care about it at all but I remembered how to do it from then on.

I remember being young and my sister and I sleeping under the tree thinking we were going to catch Santa when he came to put the presents under the tree. Santa was very careful about putting the presents under the tree and my sister and I woke up in the morning with the presents around us where we were sleeping.

Now my favorite part of Christmas is watching my nieces and nephews open their gifts. I like seeing them excited and happy and everything.
 
My favorite Christmas memory was from last year.....
***************

At this festive time of year, we in New Haven knew that the orphans who resided within the walls of Our Lady of Perpetual Guilt orphanage would not be enjoying the season without help from their neighbors.

Many of us volunteered to solicit holiday contributions from local merchants, but all were reluctant to call on one prospect. His name was Harvey Wallbanger, known widely as the richest man in town.

Our reticence stemmed from how he had made his vast fortune......he was a pimp, a dealer in human flesh, a facilitator in the business of trading sex for money.

Someone had to call on him. We had no idea whether he would be interested in our cause or not, but the spirit of the season demanded we at least try.

I was filled with fear and trepidation, but because of the worthiness of the cause, I vowed to try.

Approaching his mansion, I was scared, yet determined to see this through. Surely, there was kindness in his heart enough to contribute to the needs of the orphans.

I rang the doorbell. It took several moments before anyone appeared, but when the door opened, I found myself facing a gigantic man, standing 6'6 and looking fearsome with an expensive, seersucker suit on his immense body.....and a fierce scowl on his face.

"What you want, bitch?" growled the giant.

"Mr. Wallbanger, if you please..." I intoned hesitantly. "I was wondering....I was hoping....."

"I asked what you want, bitch!" shouted the pimp. "I ain't got all day to waste talkin' to your scraggly ass."

I was so stunned at his anger that I couldn't speak. My lips moved, yet no sound came out. Seeing my fear, he stood to his full height and gestured as if he was going to hit me, raising his arms and curling his hands into ham-like fists. Instinctively, I started to turn away from him, afraid for my life.

s9zt.jpg

"You stand still, ya little twat!" thundered Harvey Wallbanger. "You come all the way out here, botherin' me and lookin' for me to give you money? Shit, I got over $20,000 in my pocket right now.....and your tiny pussy ain't gettin' none of it, y'hear? Shit!"

Shit? Did he say shit? I was stunned. Here I had come to this man in hopes of appealing to his Christmas spirit and helping with a worthy cause.....and he says "shit?" He's swearing at me, degrading me, scaring me half to death? How dare he?

I turned back toward him, staring him straight in the eye, my sense of outrage now outweighing my fear. He stared back at me, looking down into my eyes.........and when he started to laugh at me, my mind snapped.

All I could think of was my friend Becca, and it instantly came to me how she would recommend handling a situation like this.

Doing my best Heartbreak Kid imitation, I side-kicked as high as I could, slamming Harvey Wallbanger square in the jaw with my own version of Sweet Chin Music.

The pimp dropped like a sack of potatoes, the back of his head slamming against the hard floor. He was out like a light.

zedh.jpg

Thinking only of the orphans, I went through the pockets of Wallbanger's jacket and......sure enough.....he had $20,000 in cash neatly folded in one of them. I felt no trepidation or guilt in taking the money. Giggling softly at my own audacity, I put the money in my pocket.

With a profound sense of holiday goodness, I left the pimp's house and laundered the money at the local bank in a sincere effort to make sure that all the money went to charity.

The orphans had a wonderful Christmas that year with the presents and food bought with Harvey Wallbanger's extremely generous contribution. Yes, I even listed him as the donor! Acting with a sense of fair play, we even bought the services of a few of his ****es, who showed the children a wonderful time at this most joyous time of year.


****************

This remains my best memory of Christmas!
 
My favorite Christmas memory was from last year.....
***************

At this festive time of year, we in New Haven knew that the orphans who resided within the walls of Our Lady of Perpetual Guilt orphanage would not be enjoying the season without help from their neighbors.

Many of us volunteered to solicit holiday contributions from local merchants, but all were reluctant to call on one prospect. His name was Harvey Wallbanger, known widely as the richest man in town.

Our reticence stemmed from how he had made his vast fortune......he was a pimp, a dealer in human flesh, a facilitator in the business of trading sex for money.

Someone had to call on him. We had no idea whether he would be interested in our cause or not, but the spirit of the season demanded we at least try.

I was filled with fear and trepidation, but because of the worthiness of the cause, I vowed to try.

Approaching his mansion, I was scared, yet determined to see this through. Surely, there was kindness in his heart enough to contribute to the needs of the orphans.

I rang the doorbell. It took several moments before anyone appeared, but when the door opened, I found myself facing a gigantic man, standing 6'6 and looking fearsome with an expensive, seersucker suit on his immense body.....and a fierce scowl on his face.

"What you want, bitch?" growled the giant.

"Mr. Wallbanger, if you please..." I intoned hesitantly. "I was wondering....I was hoping....."

"I asked what you want, bitch!" shouted the pimp. "I ain't got all day to waste talkin' to your scraggly ass."

I was so stunned at his anger that I couldn't speak. My lips moved, yet no sound came out. Seeing my fear, he stood to his full height and gestured as if he was going to hit me, raising his arms and curling his hands into ham-like fists. Instinctively, I started to turn away from him, afraid for my life.

s9zt.jpg

"You stand still, ya little twat!" thundered Harvey Wallbanger. "You come all the way out here, botherin' me and lookin' for me to give you money? Shit, I got over $20,000 in my pocket right now.....and your tiny pussy ain't gettin' none of it, y'hear? Shit!"

Shit? Did he say shit? I was stunned. Here I had come to this man in hopes of appealing to his Christmas spirit and helping with a worthy cause.....and he says "shit?" He's swearing at me, degrading me, scaring me half to death? How dare he?

I turned back toward him, staring him straight in the eye, my sense of outrage now outweighing my fear. He stared back at me, looking down into my eyes.........and when he started to laugh at me, my mind snapped.

All I could think of was my friend Becca, and it instantly came to me how she would recommend handling a situation like this.

Doing my best Heartbreak Kid imitation, I side-kicked as high as I could, slamming Harvey Wallbanger square in the jaw with my own version of Sweet Chin Music.

The pimp dropped like a sack of potatoes, the back of his head slamming against the hard floor. He was out like a light.

zedh.jpg

Thinking only of the orphans, I went through the pockets of Wallbanger's jacket and......sure enough.....he had $20,000 in cash neatly folded in one of them. I felt no trepidation or guilt in taking the money. Giggling softly at my own audacity, I put the money in my pocket.

With a profound sense of holiday goodness, I left the pimp's house and laundered the money at the local bank in a sincere effort to make sure that all the money went to charity.

The orphans had a wonderful Christmas that year with the presents and food bought with Harvey Wallbanger's extremely generous contribution. Yes, I even listed him as the donor! Acting with a sense of fair play, we even bought the services of a few of his ****es, who showed the children a wonderful time at this most joyous time of year.


****************

This remains my best memory of Christmas!

SO your best memory of Christmas, regardless of intent, is one of aggravated assault, and grand larceny? Remind me not to cross you on Christmas...Or any other holiday....:blush:

Did you at least call 911 when the pimp hit his head? Might be good to know he didn't wind...you know...dead?

End result: You assaulted the man, stole his cash, laundered it, and then....bought ****es for the kids? I don't know if you're extremely generous...or a sociopath.
 

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