WWF Grudge Matches with KB

klunderbunker

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WWF Grudge Matches
Host: Gorilla Monsoon
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund, Vince McMahon, Bruno Sammartino, Jesse Ventura

It’s another comp tape and I’m not entirely sure when it’s from. It’s only an hour and a half so I wouldn’t be expecting much out of this one. We do get the completely awesome old school intro so this is probably late 80s or so. Yeah I’m thinking 87-88 or something like that.

There are three versions of this tape so it’s hard to get a good idea of which this really is. Ok given how Gorilla looks this might be 1985 or so. Hogan vs. Muraco and Santana vs. Valentine. There’s a Sammartino and Koloff match in a title here. Wow this is an old one.

Hulk Hogan vs. Don Muraco

At the Garden here. The Madison Square variety that is. Gorilla is giving voiceovers here to set up the matches and here it goes over Hogan’s music. This is a rematch apparently and I’d guess this to be from around 85 or 86, more likely the latter of the two. Apparently these three fought three times at the Garden in a three month period so I’d assume this is the second or third.

Muraco jumps him early and chokes him with the shirt. White tights here for Hogan and he’s in trouble early on. Ah scratch that as he goes off on Muraco. They head to the floor and Hogan returns the favor with the choking. Fans are way into this. Back in the ring and Hogan drops a big elbow but doesn’t cover.

BIG chair to the back of Muraco which the referee is fine with apparently. Headbutt from Hogan which Gorilla says Hogan has been working on. How does that work exactly? Do you go around ramming your head into walls and time how long it takes for the headache to go away? Belly to back by Hogan and he’s firmly in control. All Hogan here as he puts Muraco into the post on the floor.

Muraco is busted open and Hogan, the saint that he is, goes right after it. Hogan bites him! Headbutts and biting. Those are hardly heroic activities. A suplex from the apron back in has Muraco reeling. A slam and the leg drop almost ends this as Muraco gets his foot on the ropes, which you can read as Fuji put it there. The referee says it’s not over yet but Muraco throws salt in Hogan’s eyes for the real DQ ending. Why would Fuji do that instead of sending Muraco in for a rollup or something?

Rating: C+. Decent little thing here with the fans being WAY into this the whole time. That often helps swing the balance of success from one side to the other. This was fine for a fast paced and quick title match with Hogan destroying Muraco completely and leaving no doubt that he was the better man. That ending puts this show on May 20, 1985.

Junkyard Dog vs. Terry Funk

No clue where this is but it doesn’t appear to be a bit place. Vince on commentary here. From what I can find this is a Superstars taping. JYD sends him to the floor with some headbutts where Hart consoles him. Back in the ring for a slugout and Dog amazingly wins it. Yeah that’s not absurd at all. Jimmy FREAKING on the floor is always funny stuff.

Hart runs into the ring and Dog drills Funk as he tries to blindside him. Funk gets caught in the ropes and here’s Hart with a branding iron which doesn’t work either. Terry is still tied up and here’s Dory Funk to drill Dog in the back of the head with a boot for the CHEAP DQ. Big beatdown follows as Jimmy takes his jacket off for the beatdown. Some faces make the save. It seems that this is Dory’s debut, putting this in January of 85.

Rating: N/A. This was like 2 minutes long and Dog dominated the vast majority of it which is absurd as you would assume it to be.

Next up is the rematch from SNME #3 which since I’ve reviewed already so it’s cut and paste time.

JYD says tonight is his day to get revenge.

Junkyard Dog vs. Terry Funk

Grab Them Cakes is a fun song. I can’t stand the guy but he had cool music. JYD jumps him early on and here we go. Funk gets crotched and I have a bad feeling about this already. Any kind of logic or fairness says Funk wins here. It’s ALL JYD to start here and the reaction is great so I guess something is working here.

Funk grabs Hart, thinking he’s JYD. Didn’t the hair or jacket tip him off at all? I guess not. It’s still all JYD here as he beats up Jimmy. Funk comes back and my faith in the universe is restored. Hart comes in again and drops the Megaphone. You know what comes next I’m assuming. Post match Funk tries to brand JYD but it doesn’t work. JYD steals Jimmy’s pants and brands his ass afterwards.

Rating: D. Pretty weak here as it was about as paint by numbers as you could ask for. Funk got a weird short push around this time as he was a great heel that WWF didn’t really ever capitalize on. To be fair though he was gone soon so it’s not like it really mattered. This was more of a comedy match but the right guy won so my complaints will be limited.

WWF Championship: Ivan Koloff vs. Bruno Sammartino

This isn’t the title change and it’s joined in progress so I have no idea how long we’ve missed. Sammartino isn’t champion here so if this is for the title Koloff is champion but the date I see on it from other sources has this in 75 which is when Bruno had the title back. Oh does it really matter? Bruno hammers him and Koloff is in trouble. This isn’t commentary but rather a long voiceover by Gorilla who is whispering almost like it’s a golf match.

Gorilla says this is 8 or 9 years ago but isn’t specific. This is rather confusing but whatever. Basically it’s nothing but power vs. power at this point. Koloff’s face is odd here as he looks like he’s pissed off but is trying not to pay attention if that makes sense. Wasn’t this supposed to be a cage match? Koloff with a headlock which doesn’t last that long. There’s the bearhug and we clip the match. I hate that.

My guess is that we clipped just the bearhug as he goes into it and after the clip he’s getting out of it. He hits the floor as we waste a lot of time. Commentary again says that Koloff is champion but that would have been five years earlier. Koloff rubs the boot into Bruno’s head and might have busted him open. Oh yeah he did.

The doctor comes in to look at it and we keep going with Bruno being all fired up and we clip it again to the referee going down. A bunch of guys come in and the match gets thrown out. One of the guys pulling them apart: the guy doing the commentary.

Rating: D. Kind of a mess here and with all the clipping it’s barely fair to give this a grade. That being said it was incredibly confusing given the whole historical mistakes etc. This wasn’t much anyway with Koloff never being much. Sammartino was fun when he got all mad as hell though so this wasn’t completely horrible.

Up next I’m not going to call this an official match as it’s for the IC Title with Santana vs. Valentine but all we get are clips. Valentine jumps him before the match and goes for the knee. He eventually gets the title. It was a 15 minute match or so compressed into about a minute so there’s no way you can fairly grade it. Hammer beats him down afterwards and injures Tito who had legit surgery soon after this.

Tito, laying in a hospital bed and drugged up for surgery, cuts a promo on Valentine while wearing big 80s sunglasses. This guy is AWESOME. He cuts a LONGER promo after the surgery where he’s still half out of it. Dude Tito Santana is freaking HARDCORE.

Intercontinental Title: Greg Valentine vs. Tito Santana

In Baltimore here and in a cage. Tito drags him into the cage and it’s on. No commentary again with Gorilla doing the voiceover. Valentine goes for the door early but Tito makes the save. This should be good either way. Both try to get out and can’t do it as the other grabs his foot. Valentine keeps trying to run which makes sense. I’m not entirely sure if I get why Tito keeps trying to run as this is supposed to be his big revenge match. I guess getting the title back is enough revenge for him.

Shoulder breaker by Valentine but you would think he would go after the leg but whatever. Escape only here if I didn’t mention that. I like the old school thoughts on cage matches like that too as pins in a cage match are kind of stupid when you think about it. Tito blocks the Figure Four as the violence is a bit low here. Gorilla points out that the figure four is a bit stupid as you can’t win by submission which makes sense to a degree I guess.

Flying forearm by Tito takes Greg down. Tito goes into the cage as this is very much back and forth. Very slow paced match but they’re hammering away in there and it’s working well I think. It’s very weird to see the match presented like this as the ring is only kind of microphoned here so you don’t here the ring make any noise at all.

This is more about the cage itself as this is back in the day when a gimmick match still meant something and wasn’t more or less something you throw in as a free prize in a cereal box. Tito gets a leg over the top but still can’t get out. Make that both legs out as Valentine is going for the door which Tito kicks on his head to get out and get the title back.

Rating: B-. This was more about the aura of the cage rather than the guys in there. Tito gets the title back and gets his revenge by beating on Valentine very well. This wasn’t a classic or anything but it was definitely a good conclusion to their feud which was always good. This worked.

Valentine destroys the belt afterwards but Tito saves it. I think this resulted in the new design coming in. Gorilla calls it the Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship of the World.

WWF Title: Bruno Sammartino vs. Billy Graham

Gorilla is the guest referee for this one and good night is he huge. He shoves Graham around for trying to jump Bruno before the bell. He has no issue with Bruno doing the same though. Gorilla is also doing the voiceover thing here and says that more or less anything goes here. For the second time he says he’s 423lbs at this point. He won’t count Graham out because he says he’s not ending a title match with a count out.

Bruno was limited in his offense but at the same time that’s all you have to do. I think this is in Toronto but I’m not sure at all. Graham gets the feet and gets something from under the ring. Ah it’s a rope. Bruno chokes him with it and Gorilla isn’t as adamant about stopping that. According to Gorilla this is in MSG also but there’s no way given how this arena looks.

The idea here is that Bruno just wants the title back and Graham is trying to find a way to escape with it as his power isn’t working this time as Bruno might be stronger and is at least just as strong. Bruno works on the knee and hooks a half crab. We get a clip again as the hold is broken. That kind of sucks the drama out of matches and I’m not a fan of it at all.

Graham throws in a low blow and Gorilla seems to be ok with it. On the commentary he claims it might have been in the thigh. Yeah the hand being up around the ass of Bruno really looks like a thigh shot Monsoon. Graham goes up top and misses a knee and Bruno is all fired up again. Ok never mind as he eats post. Billy goes out and gets the belt which Gorilla steals as well. Shame he didn’t do it before the belt hit Bruno’s cranium.

Bruno is BUSTED WIDE OPEN as I channel my inner Gorilla. Graham hits the floor to leave so Gorilla throws him back in the ring. Well you can’t say he’s not active. He says if you look hard enough in the rule book it’s in there. Graham might be busted too and now he can’t get back in the ring.

Gorilla won’t count which is kind of funny. Bruno is ALL FIRED UP and there’s the bearhug again. And there’s a shot to Gorilla but still no DQ. Now that Gorilla’s shirt is just covered in blood he has no real choice but to stop it. It’s kind of hard to question that and he points out that he didn’t have much of a choice.

Rating: B-. Another brutal fight here with all kinds of blood out there. Feuds back then were based more on what happened in the ring rather than what happened on the mic so it’s a very different kind of style. This was a pretty fun match though as Bruno just beat the living hell out of him and Graham kept trying to cheat no matter what he could do. I liked it though.

The last match here is the main event of the first Wrestlemania so here’s more cutting and pasting. Notice how awful the writing is here.

Hulk Hogan/Mr. T. vs. Paul Orndorff/Roddy Piper

Why this wasn’t Hogan against Piper one on one is beyond me. As usual, Piper has a live bagpipes band which is always cool. The fans aren’t really booing much because they know what’s coming. Real American was already taken so instead we hear Eye of the Tiger, or at least I think we do.

The eruption is so loud I’m not sure what I’m hearing. Your other referee is Pat Patterson. If you’ve seen one Hogan match you’ve seen them all for the most part and this is no exception. Hogan embarrasses his opponents to start and then gets beaten down with some cheating.

Double teams throughout the match on both Hogan and T until finally we get the brawl we’ve all waited for. Bob Orton and Jimmy Snuka are the seconds here and they both get involved. Finally Orton comes off with the cast to his Hogan but catches Orndorff instead as Hogan pins him. This prompts Piper to leave him in the ring, which led to Orndorff’s face turn. Hogan and T pose as we go off the air.

Rating: B. Basic tag match, but why was this a tag? It just made little sense and there was no drama to it at all. Hogan didn’t even win with the legdrop. Fun little match, but not for the main event of Mania.

Overall Rating
: C+. A few solid matches here but at the same time not much was working here. I really need to redo the final match of the card but that’s a different story. All things considered here the tape is just ok. You have to be a fan of the old school style to like this tape and even for a big old school fan like me this wasn’t as good as it could have been. It’s just an hour and a half long so for that amount of time with some good violence here, this is a solid tape I guess.
 

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