klunderbunker
Welcome to My (And Not Sly's) House
Slammiversary 2007
Date: June 17, 2007
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West
Back to TNA again and in this case it's the anniversary show. Since Eric and Hulk aren't around yet, we have the then signature TNA match in the form of the King of the Mountain. This is for the vacant title because the NWA left and therefore we're needing a first official TNA World Champion. Chris Harris is in the main event because.....I don't think anyone knows the answer to that actually. Let's get to it.
The opening video is a of some shots of old wrestling and then the original TNA logo. We cut to some country/bluegrass style music set to clips of the old TNA stuff. Jarrett beating up Hogan is in there. Hogan never came to TNA until 2010, officially at least. Now we're looking at someone that looks like Tiger Woods putting a golf ball as West and Tenay do commentary. Jeff Jarrett hits him with a guitar and keeps the ball from going in. Ok then.
Some band performs the theme song for the PPV. Fast forward time.
LAX vs. Rhyno/Senshi
LAX had dominated the company in 07 and this is Senshi (Kaval) and Rhyno's first time teaming together. The camera seems a bit lower than usual. Maybe it's a venue thing. Hector Guerrero is with Senshi/Rhyno because Konnan has been blaming him for LAX losing the tag belts. Rhyno and Homicide start us off and a powerbomb is messed up, sending Homicide to the floor I think by mistake.
Off to Senshi who steps onto the bottom rope to get in. Hernandez comes in and Senshi manages to get out of the way to preserve his life. He goes after SuperMex's leg which doesn't really do much at all. LAX can't get anything going here and never mind that as Hernandez picks Senshi up and LAUNCHES him across the ring. I mean that man was airborne. It looked incredible.
Back to Homicide as LAX takes over and beats on Senshi. Rhyno hasn't really done much so far but I guess they're saving him for the big hot tag at the end. To be fair he's good at the big explosive comebacks so I can live with that one. Hernandez throws Senshi around again but a powerbomb is countered and Senshi manages to hit the double stomp to set up the aforementioned hot tag. Rhyno throws everyone around and Hernandez goes to the floor. Senshi hits a HUGE dive to take him out but Homicide hits a cutter on Rhyno. Konnan and Hector get involved, allowing Rhyno to gore Homicide for the pin.
Rating: B-. Fun opener here and the high spots were VERY high. That's how you open a show as the crowd is now really fired up and it's due to the proper pacing of a tag match. On top of that, they kept it relatively short (8 minutes or so) which is the idea for an opener. Good stuff here and I liked it quite a bit.
Scott Steiner is legit injured and had to legit have his life saved in Puerto Rico so he might not be here.
We run down the card because that's what TNA does on its PPVs.
There's a mystery person in King of the Mountain, which I've already spoiled.
Video explaining King of the Mountain. We even recap the qualifying matches to fill in even more time.
Eric Young is all paranoid about getting fired. Traci Brooks, Roode's associate, comes up to try and seduce him which would eventually work, making him sign with Roode. Gail Kim comes in and snaps him out of it by kissing him.
X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal
Sabin has been champion for like five months at this point. Nash comes out for commentary because he's molded Lethal into Black Machismo recently. Nash's headset goes out almost immediately after the bell rings and the fans are split. Lethal gets a pretty sweet headscissors to send him to the floor, followed by an ok suicide dive. Sabin spits in Lethal's face and hits a jumping knee to the face to take over.
Sabin fires off something like a Garvin Stomp but does it fast enough that I don't have to think of Garvin. The announcers are talking about Nash beating Backlund in MSG. How exactly can you analyze a match that lasted 8 seconds? We go into a standard match formula with Sabin beating Lethal down until we get to the Lethal comeback and then go to the finish.
I'm not sure what it means when you can more or less call the formula for a match about halfway through it, but I don't think it's anything good. Lethal makes that comeback with a few hip tosses and a spinning cross body for two. Nash: This place used to be called Jonesville. Then I got here. Lethal hits a unique move which can only be described as a reverse fisherman's suplex into a reverse powerbomb. Looked good but too complicated at the same time.
Sabin takes over with some rapid fire kicks which is what he would get more famous as soon enough in the Motor City Machine Guns. Lethal grabs a full nelson but can't hit the Lethal Combination. The second time works a bit better and the big elbow gives Lethal his first of I believe six X-Titles.
Rating: C. Just ok here and nothing all that great. Lethal wasn't exactly over yet and he wouldn't be for a long time. At this point he was just a goofy 22 year old who did nothing but imitated a much better guy. Nothing to see here but for a big show they needed a title change so that's all fine and good.
At the Slammiversary press conference, we set up the football players match. Yeah there are former Tennessee Titans wrestling tonight. Oh joy.
Storm is with Lauren (GORGEOUS) and rants about Wycheck some more.
Frank Wycheck/Jerry Lynn vs. James Storm/Ron Killings
Why is this happening? Oh because Wycheck was at the first shows. Ok then. Truth and Lynn start us off which is probably the best thing they can do. Off to Wycheck for the showdown with Storm....and Storm knocks him down on the first shot. Storm puts on a Titans helmet and dances around a bit and then knocks Wycheck down again.
Frank takes over and throws Lynn over the top onto the heels and the fans think this is good stuff. I guess the TNA stupidity follows them around. Wycheck misses a shot and is in trouble again. He had to retire due to concussions so the heels go for his head. A chair is brought in but the distraction is enough to get the tag to Lynn. Eye of the Storm takes care of him and Storm spits beer in the face of the other football player at ringside.
Truth comes in and doesn't do as well so it's a double tag again. Wycheck beats up both heels with celebrity stuff but Storm kicks his head off to cheers. The other football player makes the save and gets in a fight with Jackie. Everything breaks down and Storm has to take the cradle piledriver from Wycheck. Dang I hope he got a nice big bonus for that one.
Rating: D. I hate celebrity matches. I have no connection to Frank Wycheck and the only reason he's there was he was a big football player in Tennessee. I love the NFL, but this doesn't mean anything to me and we have to get a bad match that looks like Storm isn't talented enough to beat a guy with zero experience. I hate these things.
We recap Backlund vs. Shelley. Shelley was one of Nash's students and Backlund was crazy about Nash beating him back in 94. Shelley said that he could beat Backlund in 9 seconds and there was something about a book being stolen or something like that.
Bob Backlund vs. Alex Shelley
Backlund is one of those cases where I have no idea what they were thinking when they brought him in. We hear the stories of Backlund not signing autographs unless you can recite all of the presidents in order. Backlund takes him down with ease and the fans are mostly on Shelley's side. They slug it out a bit and Backlund takes him into a short armed scissors. Backlund uses the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter (which should be called the Backlund counter but whatever).
Backlund hits a gorgeous butterfly suplex and then an atomic drop which used to be Backlund's finisher. Sabin runs in to trip him up but gets crotched on the top. Shelley gets dropped into Sabin's balls and a bridging O'Connor Roll beats Shelley clean. Yes, Bob Backlund just destroyed the Motor City Machineguns by himself in less than four minutes.
Rating: C-. The match was fine but this is a great example of what were they thinking. I mean don't get me wrong, Backlund is a legend, but this is the year 2007. Who are they really appealing to with him? This one isn't about me being mad about him being there, but more of genuine confusion. I don't get this one at all.
The Guns try to double team him but they both get put in the Crossface Chickenwing. Nash comes out to break it up and Jerry Lynn comes out to even the odds. Nash kicks Lynn down and the Guns beat up Backlund. Now Jay Lethal comes down and beats up the Guns as well. I have NO IDEA what just happened.
Christopher Daniels starts calling out Sting and the lights go out. He's the Fallen Angel at the moment and is facing Sting tonight. Daniels talks about being here to do the Father's work and how he's an angel. Again, I have no idea what they're talking about here and I don't think they know either.
We recap Christy Hemme vs. the Voodoo Kin Mafia (New Age Outlaws). They basically said you have to sleep your way to the top so she brought in a bunch of teams to face them and I think this is the final one with her bringing in the Bashams. There was a big brawl backstage and Road Dogg gave a big angry promo about it.
Voodoo Kin Mafia vs. Damaja/Basham
At least we can look at Christy's hottness. Big brawl to start and no one is really all that interested. Christy is chased into the ring and oh hey there's the bell. Basham (Danny) vs. Road Dogg to start us off. Roadie gets beaten down and it's off to Kip. He gets double teamed as well as the Bashams set for a double suplex. Roadie spears one of them and Billy gets a small package to Basham for the pin. This was NOTHING, not even lasting three minutes.
Billy chases Christy up the ramp but VKM associate Lance Hoyt picks her off. And then Hoyt beats up the VKM. Jimmy Rave would be added to form the Rock N Rave Infection which would only result in more tiny outfits for Christy and nothing else to note. This should have been on Impact. Oh and Christy kisses Hoyt after the Bashams help for a 3-2 beatdown.
Rick Steiner is mad about not having a match tonight but he has a partner. He whispers it in Cornette's ear and Jim is very happy, saying the match is on.
LAX beats up Hector Guerrero.
We recap Roode vs. Young which is STILL going on. Jeff Jarrett made a one off return to help Eric and won Young's freedom which didn't count. The match is for Eric's freedom of course but if Eric loses he's fired, which was what Eric was terrified of at this point.
Robert Roode vs. Eric Young
Roode slaps Young in the head a bit and it fires Young up, making him shout HIT ME AGAIN. Young sends him to the floor and hits a huge dive off the top to take Roode out. Roode takes over quickly and we make Brooks has big boobs jokes. There's the Hennig neck snap and Roode is in total control. Time for a chinlock and I remember why I hated this heel run by Roode.
Eric counters into an electric chair drop and both guys are down. Discus lariat gets two for Eric. Young is sent to the floor so he pulls Brooks' pants down after dancing with her. Top rope elbow gets two for Eric. Brooks comes in and there's a double Death Valley Driver which gets two on Roode. You know, because a big and impressive spot like that shouldn't end a match. And then Roode whacks Eric in the head with a chair for the pin. Seriously that's it.
Rating: C-. The ending KILLS that match. Young was rather popular at this point and having him lose after a big spot like that is really pretty stupid. Roode was SO freaking boring as a heel and he never really changed anything about his character, which somehow made him even more boring. Decent match until the ending, but that kills it.
It's a Dusty Finish though. Roode fires Eric but here's Cornette to say hang on a second. The match is restarted and Roode hits him in the head multiple times. Gail runs out and beats down Brooks. The distraction leads to a rollup pin for Eric.
Team 3D doesn't care who Steiner's partner is. They think Scott's throat problem is because he talked about the Dudleys too much and he's hiding. D-Von's head looks like it's made of old shoe leather.
Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Rick Steiner/???
And the mystery partner is....Road Warrior Animal. Yeah that's it. The fans chanting it before he came out kind of hurt the shock a bit. Rick puts on his head gear post bell and it makes a huge difference. Rick vs. D-Von to start us off. I don't think Scott is in the hospital. I think it's more like he and Animal cooked him and had him for a late night snack. It would explain those guts on them.
Animal offers to come in and Rick waves him off. Nice partner dude. Oh ok there he is and Ray gets in his face. A piledriver is no sold and we have gimmick infringement from Hawk. I guess since he's dead it's ok. Back to Rick and they mistime something, as I think Ray was supposed to hit Rick as he hit the ropes but Rick stopped with zero contact at all. Off to Bubba legally and a neckbreaker gets two.
D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt and there's the tag to Animal. Something I never get: why can a team that has never teamed together before like Steiner and Animal get a tag title match? There isn't another team that can challenge the Dudleys? Animal cleans house and it's back to Rick as everything breaks down. The challengers try to load up the Doomsday Device but Animal gets caught in the double neckbreaker and the 3D ends Rick.
Rating: D. These dream matches usually suck because by the time you get teams big enough to have a dream match, they're old. To be fair though, there was almost no way Animal, who barely wrestled anymore, was going to be able to come out there and have a decent match. Scott may be old and slow but he's active at least. Bad match, but understandably bad.
We recap Daniels vs. Sting. Sting mentored him which I don't even remember and Daniels snapped because of it. I remember being excited for this match but thinking the match sucked. I wonder if it'll still be the case. Wait....that might have been Sting vs. Storm. I think it was actually.
Christopher Daniels vs. Sting
Sting repels from the ceiling for no apparent reason. It looked cool though. Sting takes over to start and speeds things up, which you would think would favor Daniels. He hooks the Deathlock very quickly but Daniels grabs a fast rope. Daniels takes over and has a stupid Mike Tyson style tattoo (paint) around his eye. Sting fights back but neither guy can get a hip toss.
We go old school with an abdominal stretch which doesn't count for some reason. Daniels and Hebner get into it a bit and then he snaps off a Stinger Splash. This of course fires up the Stinger and Daniels is in trouble. Faceplant gets two. Two Stinger Splashes are broken up and the Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) is countered into the Death Drop for the pin.
Rating: D+. Yeah it was this match that I found boring and lackluster. There was nothing here at all and Sting just beat him up like he was any other guy. Daniels had been built up as the guy that could take down Sting and Sting destroyed him here. I don't get the point of this one and it didn't work at all.
We recap Abyss vs. Tomko. This was another part of Abyss vs. Christian's Coalition. Abyss had taken a huge beatdown from the whole team and Tomko is the first victim for him.
Christian's Coalition says Christian will win the title tonight. AJ protests because he's in there too. Christian says AJ will sacrifice himself so Christian can win the title and Styles isn't sure what to think of that but he goes along with it because he's an idiot at this point.
Tomko vs. Abyss
This is No DQ. Slugout to start is won by Abyss and they head to the floor. Tomko takes over with the violent tendencies, ramming Abyss into the steps to take over. Back in a bit boot puts Tomko down and TOTALLY misses an Umaga charge in the corner. Tomko sold it anyway because he's not that talented. Chokeslam gets two. Here are the tacks but Tomko reverses and powerbombs Abyss onto them for two.
Abyss' arm is busted open so he fires a shot to Tomko and hits the floor to get another bag. This time it's glass but again he takes too long and Tomko gets a big jagged piece and drives it into Abyss' head. In a SICK spot, Abyss is kneeling over the glass so Tomko practically curb stomps him into it. FREAKING OW MAN!!! They head to the floor again and Tomko finds a barbed wire ball bat which goes into the ribs and back of Abyss.
They go to the entrance and begin to climb. This isn't going to end well. Tomko is up top with the bat but Abyss grabs the bat and pulls Tomko down to a big box sort of thing which falls apart. Tomko being up a few seconds later completely ruins the spot. I mean he's up maybe 8 seconds later. Abyss is down even longer than Tomko was after that flip. Are you kidding me? Back in the ring, Tomko tries to pick Abyss up but walks into the Black Hole Slam onto the glass for the pin. That was pretty anti-climactic.
Rating: B-. This was about violence and on that note it worked, but the big spot of the match completely bombed. Like I said, having him pop up so fast just killed it. Not a great match or anything here but it was fun for the most part and that's really all they could have hoped for out of this one.
Angle and Joe stare it down in the back. Angle says let's go have a great match and beat each other up badly. Joe shakes his hand but says tonight it's real.
Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He shows us an interview with Jeff Jarrett. His wife Jill had legitimately died recently and he wasn't sure if he was going to keep wrestling. He talks about the history of the company, including stuff like Toby Keith and beating up Hulk Hogan. He talks about founding the company and his wife agreeing that it was ok. Then he gets to the heavy stuff, talking about his wife passing away less than a month ago. Jarrett is in tears almost the entire time while he's saying this. Being in the ring is the worst place he can be right now though, so his future is unknown.
The fans aren't sure if they should chant for Jill or Jeff.
Cornette announces the last guy in the match will be Chris Harris.
TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage vs. Chris Harris
This is King of the Mountain and the title is vacant. Ok so King of the Mountain is TNA's signature match, or at least it was before Hogan and Bischoff took over. There are five guys and there is a place to hang the belt above the ring. In essence, it's a reverse ladder match because you have to hang the belt above the ring. Before you're allowed to do that though, you have to qualify by pinning someone else. When someone is pinned that person has to go to the penalty box for two minutes. Got all that?
Joe goes right after Angle. Cornette is holding the belt. This is kind of a mess at first which makes it really hard to call. Cage and Styles beat up Harris and then Styles lays down for Cage. Angle makes the save but Joe wants to hurt him some more. Styles takes Harris down again and wants Christian to lay down. Christian says no so Styles rolls him up for two. The camera is all over the place, making it really hard to keep up with.
Joe and Christian are in the ring now and down goes the Canadian. Off to Harris but the Cataonic and Unprettier both miss. A full nelson slam puts Christian down but Styles breaks it up. He gets caught in the Catatonic for a fast pin by Harris, making him eligible. The clock for AJ is at 1:30 by the time he gets in the cage. Harris and Cage fight on the floor so Joe throws a ladder at them.
Back to Angle vs. Joe with the fat boy taking over. Angle grabs a boot though and here are the Rolling Germans. Christian comes in and is in an ankle lock/Koquina Clutch combo. Styles gets out just in time for the save. Cage puts a ladder between the ring and barricade like a bridge. Christian falls down onto it due to a right hand by Harris to crotch him. On top of that he's stuck there.
In the ring, AJ hits the Pele and springboard forearm to put Joe outside. Styles Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock but AJ breaks it, sending Kurt to the floor. AJ gets launched onto Christian onto the ladder. Harris goes up another ladder but Angle Slams him off for a pin to become eligible. Joe THINKS and throws the ladder to the floor. He beats up everyone in sight, hitting a MuscleBuster on AJ for two.
We get a ref bump in a gimmick match. Angle gets put in the choke and he taps, but there's no referee. Christian hits Joe with a ladder and steals the pin on Kurt. Man there are some smart people in this company. The referee can't let Harris out even though his time is up. Oh there's another referee so it doesn't matter. Joe stops Christian from hanging the belt and hits a huge cutter off the ladder onto the belt.
Harris goes up with the belt and people start booing. A belt shot stops Joe and he hiptosses Christian off, but Styles hits a springboard dropkick to break it up. Angle is out of the box. AJ and Joe climb on top of the box for no apparent reason. AJ kicks Joe low but Joe launches AJ off the top and through the announce table. Harris knocks Joe off the top and Christian is tossed back into the ring after climbing up as well. Harris hits a huge clothesline to kill Angle.
Everyone is down so Harris goes Terry Funk and spins around with the ladder over his head. He goes up AGAIN but Christian knocks him over and into the buckle. Christian goes up but Kurt grabs the ankle lock while the Canadian is still up there. No tap though and they fight on the ladder. Harris spears Christian off and Angle hangs the belt to become champion. How bad is it that I don't remember him pinning anyone? I had to go back and find where he pinned Harris.
Rating: B. Good match here as the King of the Mountain was its usual insane but fun self. This is TNA's signature match and almost as usual it gets to be a fun match. Angle winning the title and becoming the first champion is probably the right move. They waited WAY too long on pulling the trigger on Joe, but that's TNA for you. Good main event though.
Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. There's some good stuff on there for sure and the last two matches are both fun, but MY GOODNESS is this a chore to sit through. The core of this show is just exhausting and it feels like it's never going to end. Not a horrible show at all but I'd have a remote in hand to fast forward about 60% of it, which isn't a good thing at all.
Date: June 17, 2007
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Don West
Back to TNA again and in this case it's the anniversary show. Since Eric and Hulk aren't around yet, we have the then signature TNA match in the form of the King of the Mountain. This is for the vacant title because the NWA left and therefore we're needing a first official TNA World Champion. Chris Harris is in the main event because.....I don't think anyone knows the answer to that actually. Let's get to it.
The opening video is a of some shots of old wrestling and then the original TNA logo. We cut to some country/bluegrass style music set to clips of the old TNA stuff. Jarrett beating up Hogan is in there. Hogan never came to TNA until 2010, officially at least. Now we're looking at someone that looks like Tiger Woods putting a golf ball as West and Tenay do commentary. Jeff Jarrett hits him with a guitar and keeps the ball from going in. Ok then.
Some band performs the theme song for the PPV. Fast forward time.
LAX vs. Rhyno/Senshi
LAX had dominated the company in 07 and this is Senshi (Kaval) and Rhyno's first time teaming together. The camera seems a bit lower than usual. Maybe it's a venue thing. Hector Guerrero is with Senshi/Rhyno because Konnan has been blaming him for LAX losing the tag belts. Rhyno and Homicide start us off and a powerbomb is messed up, sending Homicide to the floor I think by mistake.
Off to Senshi who steps onto the bottom rope to get in. Hernandez comes in and Senshi manages to get out of the way to preserve his life. He goes after SuperMex's leg which doesn't really do much at all. LAX can't get anything going here and never mind that as Hernandez picks Senshi up and LAUNCHES him across the ring. I mean that man was airborne. It looked incredible.
Back to Homicide as LAX takes over and beats on Senshi. Rhyno hasn't really done much so far but I guess they're saving him for the big hot tag at the end. To be fair he's good at the big explosive comebacks so I can live with that one. Hernandez throws Senshi around again but a powerbomb is countered and Senshi manages to hit the double stomp to set up the aforementioned hot tag. Rhyno throws everyone around and Hernandez goes to the floor. Senshi hits a HUGE dive to take him out but Homicide hits a cutter on Rhyno. Konnan and Hector get involved, allowing Rhyno to gore Homicide for the pin.
Rating: B-. Fun opener here and the high spots were VERY high. That's how you open a show as the crowd is now really fired up and it's due to the proper pacing of a tag match. On top of that, they kept it relatively short (8 minutes or so) which is the idea for an opener. Good stuff here and I liked it quite a bit.
Scott Steiner is legit injured and had to legit have his life saved in Puerto Rico so he might not be here.
We run down the card because that's what TNA does on its PPVs.
There's a mystery person in King of the Mountain, which I've already spoiled.
Video explaining King of the Mountain. We even recap the qualifying matches to fill in even more time.
Eric Young is all paranoid about getting fired. Traci Brooks, Roode's associate, comes up to try and seduce him which would eventually work, making him sign with Roode. Gail Kim comes in and snaps him out of it by kissing him.
X-Division Title: Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal
Sabin has been champion for like five months at this point. Nash comes out for commentary because he's molded Lethal into Black Machismo recently. Nash's headset goes out almost immediately after the bell rings and the fans are split. Lethal gets a pretty sweet headscissors to send him to the floor, followed by an ok suicide dive. Sabin spits in Lethal's face and hits a jumping knee to the face to take over.
Sabin fires off something like a Garvin Stomp but does it fast enough that I don't have to think of Garvin. The announcers are talking about Nash beating Backlund in MSG. How exactly can you analyze a match that lasted 8 seconds? We go into a standard match formula with Sabin beating Lethal down until we get to the Lethal comeback and then go to the finish.
I'm not sure what it means when you can more or less call the formula for a match about halfway through it, but I don't think it's anything good. Lethal makes that comeback with a few hip tosses and a spinning cross body for two. Nash: This place used to be called Jonesville. Then I got here. Lethal hits a unique move which can only be described as a reverse fisherman's suplex into a reverse powerbomb. Looked good but too complicated at the same time.
Sabin takes over with some rapid fire kicks which is what he would get more famous as soon enough in the Motor City Machine Guns. Lethal grabs a full nelson but can't hit the Lethal Combination. The second time works a bit better and the big elbow gives Lethal his first of I believe six X-Titles.
Rating: C. Just ok here and nothing all that great. Lethal wasn't exactly over yet and he wouldn't be for a long time. At this point he was just a goofy 22 year old who did nothing but imitated a much better guy. Nothing to see here but for a big show they needed a title change so that's all fine and good.
At the Slammiversary press conference, we set up the football players match. Yeah there are former Tennessee Titans wrestling tonight. Oh joy.
Storm is with Lauren (GORGEOUS) and rants about Wycheck some more.
Frank Wycheck/Jerry Lynn vs. James Storm/Ron Killings
Why is this happening? Oh because Wycheck was at the first shows. Ok then. Truth and Lynn start us off which is probably the best thing they can do. Off to Wycheck for the showdown with Storm....and Storm knocks him down on the first shot. Storm puts on a Titans helmet and dances around a bit and then knocks Wycheck down again.
Frank takes over and throws Lynn over the top onto the heels and the fans think this is good stuff. I guess the TNA stupidity follows them around. Wycheck misses a shot and is in trouble again. He had to retire due to concussions so the heels go for his head. A chair is brought in but the distraction is enough to get the tag to Lynn. Eye of the Storm takes care of him and Storm spits beer in the face of the other football player at ringside.
Truth comes in and doesn't do as well so it's a double tag again. Wycheck beats up both heels with celebrity stuff but Storm kicks his head off to cheers. The other football player makes the save and gets in a fight with Jackie. Everything breaks down and Storm has to take the cradle piledriver from Wycheck. Dang I hope he got a nice big bonus for that one.
Rating: D. I hate celebrity matches. I have no connection to Frank Wycheck and the only reason he's there was he was a big football player in Tennessee. I love the NFL, but this doesn't mean anything to me and we have to get a bad match that looks like Storm isn't talented enough to beat a guy with zero experience. I hate these things.
We recap Backlund vs. Shelley. Shelley was one of Nash's students and Backlund was crazy about Nash beating him back in 94. Shelley said that he could beat Backlund in 9 seconds and there was something about a book being stolen or something like that.
Bob Backlund vs. Alex Shelley
Backlund is one of those cases where I have no idea what they were thinking when they brought him in. We hear the stories of Backlund not signing autographs unless you can recite all of the presidents in order. Backlund takes him down with ease and the fans are mostly on Shelley's side. They slug it out a bit and Backlund takes him into a short armed scissors. Backlund uses the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels counter (which should be called the Backlund counter but whatever).
Backlund hits a gorgeous butterfly suplex and then an atomic drop which used to be Backlund's finisher. Sabin runs in to trip him up but gets crotched on the top. Shelley gets dropped into Sabin's balls and a bridging O'Connor Roll beats Shelley clean. Yes, Bob Backlund just destroyed the Motor City Machineguns by himself in less than four minutes.
Rating: C-. The match was fine but this is a great example of what were they thinking. I mean don't get me wrong, Backlund is a legend, but this is the year 2007. Who are they really appealing to with him? This one isn't about me being mad about him being there, but more of genuine confusion. I don't get this one at all.
The Guns try to double team him but they both get put in the Crossface Chickenwing. Nash comes out to break it up and Jerry Lynn comes out to even the odds. Nash kicks Lynn down and the Guns beat up Backlund. Now Jay Lethal comes down and beats up the Guns as well. I have NO IDEA what just happened.
Christopher Daniels starts calling out Sting and the lights go out. He's the Fallen Angel at the moment and is facing Sting tonight. Daniels talks about being here to do the Father's work and how he's an angel. Again, I have no idea what they're talking about here and I don't think they know either.
We recap Christy Hemme vs. the Voodoo Kin Mafia (New Age Outlaws). They basically said you have to sleep your way to the top so she brought in a bunch of teams to face them and I think this is the final one with her bringing in the Bashams. There was a big brawl backstage and Road Dogg gave a big angry promo about it.
Voodoo Kin Mafia vs. Damaja/Basham
At least we can look at Christy's hottness. Big brawl to start and no one is really all that interested. Christy is chased into the ring and oh hey there's the bell. Basham (Danny) vs. Road Dogg to start us off. Roadie gets beaten down and it's off to Kip. He gets double teamed as well as the Bashams set for a double suplex. Roadie spears one of them and Billy gets a small package to Basham for the pin. This was NOTHING, not even lasting three minutes.
Billy chases Christy up the ramp but VKM associate Lance Hoyt picks her off. And then Hoyt beats up the VKM. Jimmy Rave would be added to form the Rock N Rave Infection which would only result in more tiny outfits for Christy and nothing else to note. This should have been on Impact. Oh and Christy kisses Hoyt after the Bashams help for a 3-2 beatdown.
Rick Steiner is mad about not having a match tonight but he has a partner. He whispers it in Cornette's ear and Jim is very happy, saying the match is on.
LAX beats up Hector Guerrero.
We recap Roode vs. Young which is STILL going on. Jeff Jarrett made a one off return to help Eric and won Young's freedom which didn't count. The match is for Eric's freedom of course but if Eric loses he's fired, which was what Eric was terrified of at this point.
Robert Roode vs. Eric Young
Roode slaps Young in the head a bit and it fires Young up, making him shout HIT ME AGAIN. Young sends him to the floor and hits a huge dive off the top to take Roode out. Roode takes over quickly and we make Brooks has big boobs jokes. There's the Hennig neck snap and Roode is in total control. Time for a chinlock and I remember why I hated this heel run by Roode.
Eric counters into an electric chair drop and both guys are down. Discus lariat gets two for Eric. Young is sent to the floor so he pulls Brooks' pants down after dancing with her. Top rope elbow gets two for Eric. Brooks comes in and there's a double Death Valley Driver which gets two on Roode. You know, because a big and impressive spot like that shouldn't end a match. And then Roode whacks Eric in the head with a chair for the pin. Seriously that's it.
Rating: C-. The ending KILLS that match. Young was rather popular at this point and having him lose after a big spot like that is really pretty stupid. Roode was SO freaking boring as a heel and he never really changed anything about his character, which somehow made him even more boring. Decent match until the ending, but that kills it.
It's a Dusty Finish though. Roode fires Eric but here's Cornette to say hang on a second. The match is restarted and Roode hits him in the head multiple times. Gail runs out and beats down Brooks. The distraction leads to a rollup pin for Eric.
Team 3D doesn't care who Steiner's partner is. They think Scott's throat problem is because he talked about the Dudleys too much and he's hiding. D-Von's head looks like it's made of old shoe leather.
Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Rick Steiner/???
And the mystery partner is....Road Warrior Animal. Yeah that's it. The fans chanting it before he came out kind of hurt the shock a bit. Rick puts on his head gear post bell and it makes a huge difference. Rick vs. D-Von to start us off. I don't think Scott is in the hospital. I think it's more like he and Animal cooked him and had him for a late night snack. It would explain those guts on them.
Animal offers to come in and Rick waves him off. Nice partner dude. Oh ok there he is and Ray gets in his face. A piledriver is no sold and we have gimmick infringement from Hawk. I guess since he's dead it's ok. Back to Rick and they mistime something, as I think Ray was supposed to hit Rick as he hit the ropes but Rick stopped with zero contact at all. Off to Bubba legally and a neckbreaker gets two.
D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt and there's the tag to Animal. Something I never get: why can a team that has never teamed together before like Steiner and Animal get a tag title match? There isn't another team that can challenge the Dudleys? Animal cleans house and it's back to Rick as everything breaks down. The challengers try to load up the Doomsday Device but Animal gets caught in the double neckbreaker and the 3D ends Rick.
Rating: D. These dream matches usually suck because by the time you get teams big enough to have a dream match, they're old. To be fair though, there was almost no way Animal, who barely wrestled anymore, was going to be able to come out there and have a decent match. Scott may be old and slow but he's active at least. Bad match, but understandably bad.
We recap Daniels vs. Sting. Sting mentored him which I don't even remember and Daniels snapped because of it. I remember being excited for this match but thinking the match sucked. I wonder if it'll still be the case. Wait....that might have been Sting vs. Storm. I think it was actually.
Christopher Daniels vs. Sting
Sting repels from the ceiling for no apparent reason. It looked cool though. Sting takes over to start and speeds things up, which you would think would favor Daniels. He hooks the Deathlock very quickly but Daniels grabs a fast rope. Daniels takes over and has a stupid Mike Tyson style tattoo (paint) around his eye. Sting fights back but neither guy can get a hip toss.
We go old school with an abdominal stretch which doesn't count for some reason. Daniels and Hebner get into it a bit and then he snaps off a Stinger Splash. This of course fires up the Stinger and Daniels is in trouble. Faceplant gets two. Two Stinger Splashes are broken up and the Last Rites (Cross Rhodes) is countered into the Death Drop for the pin.
Rating: D+. Yeah it was this match that I found boring and lackluster. There was nothing here at all and Sting just beat him up like he was any other guy. Daniels had been built up as the guy that could take down Sting and Sting destroyed him here. I don't get the point of this one and it didn't work at all.
We recap Abyss vs. Tomko. This was another part of Abyss vs. Christian's Coalition. Abyss had taken a huge beatdown from the whole team and Tomko is the first victim for him.
Christian's Coalition says Christian will win the title tonight. AJ protests because he's in there too. Christian says AJ will sacrifice himself so Christian can win the title and Styles isn't sure what to think of that but he goes along with it because he's an idiot at this point.
Tomko vs. Abyss
This is No DQ. Slugout to start is won by Abyss and they head to the floor. Tomko takes over with the violent tendencies, ramming Abyss into the steps to take over. Back in a bit boot puts Tomko down and TOTALLY misses an Umaga charge in the corner. Tomko sold it anyway because he's not that talented. Chokeslam gets two. Here are the tacks but Tomko reverses and powerbombs Abyss onto them for two.
Abyss' arm is busted open so he fires a shot to Tomko and hits the floor to get another bag. This time it's glass but again he takes too long and Tomko gets a big jagged piece and drives it into Abyss' head. In a SICK spot, Abyss is kneeling over the glass so Tomko practically curb stomps him into it. FREAKING OW MAN!!! They head to the floor again and Tomko finds a barbed wire ball bat which goes into the ribs and back of Abyss.
They go to the entrance and begin to climb. This isn't going to end well. Tomko is up top with the bat but Abyss grabs the bat and pulls Tomko down to a big box sort of thing which falls apart. Tomko being up a few seconds later completely ruins the spot. I mean he's up maybe 8 seconds later. Abyss is down even longer than Tomko was after that flip. Are you kidding me? Back in the ring, Tomko tries to pick Abyss up but walks into the Black Hole Slam onto the glass for the pin. That was pretty anti-climactic.
Rating: B-. This was about violence and on that note it worked, but the big spot of the match completely bombed. Like I said, having him pop up so fast just killed it. Not a great match or anything here but it was fun for the most part and that's really all they could have hoped for out of this one.
Angle and Joe stare it down in the back. Angle says let's go have a great match and beat each other up badly. Joe shakes his hand but says tonight it's real.
Mike Tenay is in the ring for some reason. He shows us an interview with Jeff Jarrett. His wife Jill had legitimately died recently and he wasn't sure if he was going to keep wrestling. He talks about the history of the company, including stuff like Toby Keith and beating up Hulk Hogan. He talks about founding the company and his wife agreeing that it was ok. Then he gets to the heavy stuff, talking about his wife passing away less than a month ago. Jarrett is in tears almost the entire time while he's saying this. Being in the ring is the worst place he can be right now though, so his future is unknown.
The fans aren't sure if they should chant for Jill or Jeff.
Cornette announces the last guy in the match will be Chris Harris.
TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christian Cage vs. Chris Harris
This is King of the Mountain and the title is vacant. Ok so King of the Mountain is TNA's signature match, or at least it was before Hogan and Bischoff took over. There are five guys and there is a place to hang the belt above the ring. In essence, it's a reverse ladder match because you have to hang the belt above the ring. Before you're allowed to do that though, you have to qualify by pinning someone else. When someone is pinned that person has to go to the penalty box for two minutes. Got all that?
Joe goes right after Angle. Cornette is holding the belt. This is kind of a mess at first which makes it really hard to call. Cage and Styles beat up Harris and then Styles lays down for Cage. Angle makes the save but Joe wants to hurt him some more. Styles takes Harris down again and wants Christian to lay down. Christian says no so Styles rolls him up for two. The camera is all over the place, making it really hard to keep up with.
Joe and Christian are in the ring now and down goes the Canadian. Off to Harris but the Cataonic and Unprettier both miss. A full nelson slam puts Christian down but Styles breaks it up. He gets caught in the Catatonic for a fast pin by Harris, making him eligible. The clock for AJ is at 1:30 by the time he gets in the cage. Harris and Cage fight on the floor so Joe throws a ladder at them.
Back to Angle vs. Joe with the fat boy taking over. Angle grabs a boot though and here are the Rolling Germans. Christian comes in and is in an ankle lock/Koquina Clutch combo. Styles gets out just in time for the save. Cage puts a ladder between the ring and barricade like a bridge. Christian falls down onto it due to a right hand by Harris to crotch him. On top of that he's stuck there.
In the ring, AJ hits the Pele and springboard forearm to put Joe outside. Styles Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock but AJ breaks it, sending Kurt to the floor. AJ gets launched onto Christian onto the ladder. Harris goes up another ladder but Angle Slams him off for a pin to become eligible. Joe THINKS and throws the ladder to the floor. He beats up everyone in sight, hitting a MuscleBuster on AJ for two.
We get a ref bump in a gimmick match. Angle gets put in the choke and he taps, but there's no referee. Christian hits Joe with a ladder and steals the pin on Kurt. Man there are some smart people in this company. The referee can't let Harris out even though his time is up. Oh there's another referee so it doesn't matter. Joe stops Christian from hanging the belt and hits a huge cutter off the ladder onto the belt.
Harris goes up with the belt and people start booing. A belt shot stops Joe and he hiptosses Christian off, but Styles hits a springboard dropkick to break it up. Angle is out of the box. AJ and Joe climb on top of the box for no apparent reason. AJ kicks Joe low but Joe launches AJ off the top and through the announce table. Harris knocks Joe off the top and Christian is tossed back into the ring after climbing up as well. Harris hits a huge clothesline to kill Angle.
Everyone is down so Harris goes Terry Funk and spins around with the ladder over his head. He goes up AGAIN but Christian knocks him over and into the buckle. Christian goes up but Kurt grabs the ankle lock while the Canadian is still up there. No tap though and they fight on the ladder. Harris spears Christian off and Angle hangs the belt to become champion. How bad is it that I don't remember him pinning anyone? I had to go back and find where he pinned Harris.
Rating: B. Good match here as the King of the Mountain was its usual insane but fun self. This is TNA's signature match and almost as usual it gets to be a fun match. Angle winning the title and becoming the first champion is probably the right move. They waited WAY too long on pulling the trigger on Joe, but that's TNA for you. Good main event though.
Overall Rating: C-. This is a really hard one to grade. There's some good stuff on there for sure and the last two matches are both fun, but MY GOODNESS is this a chore to sit through. The core of this show is just exhausting and it feels like it's never going to end. Not a horrible show at all but I'd have a remote in hand to fast forward about 60% of it, which isn't a good thing at all.