Round 1: Deadpool vs. Hungarian Horntail

Discussion in 'Supers Section' started by JGlass, Sep 8, 2012.

?

Who wins?

  1. Deadpool

  2. Hungarian Horntail

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  1. GI Cake

    GI Cake Thank God For Sodamy.

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    Where was this super macho man bravado in the Spider-Man/Flash debate? If you are going to act like a tough guy, at least be like Jose and act like a tough guy all the time.


    Yes, they used magic, they used prepping and planned a trap and with magic subdued a dragon. Or maybe even easier they snatched a dragon egg before it was hatched. The way Wizards captured dragons in Harry Potter and the rules on this tournament here are completely different. Once again you are looking at this in a whole different way to validate your opinion. Maybe if Deadpool knew magic and had prep time to figure a plot to subdue the dragon this could be a valid argument.




    Once again the 50 foot tall dragon argument comes into play yet again. Most of Deadpool's conventional weapons, his swords, daggers, automatic weapons, they are all the size of flies compared to the pure size of the dragon. Unless Deadpool can grab something large enough to do any actual damage, and actually land it before he is shook off and eaten, then this argument holds no real water.


    Except we are once again dealing with a 50 foot dragon with a much larger head. I'm not arguing that there won't be any damage in the eye. I'm saying it won't be enough to actually subdue or take down the dragon.


    Tell that to Daredevil, Punisher, and Squirrel Girl. Deadpool is a trained killer, but he is a barely functioning lunatic with a brain tumor in his head. He doesn't think, he fights on instinct and just slashes until everything around him is dead or someone ripped off his arms. He is not smart, he is crazy.

    Are you under the impression that I am a 50 foot dragon? If you poke a dragon in the eye, it will get pissed and start to swing around, breath fire, and break everything. Hell, if it needed to it would ram it's own head into a wall and splat Deadpool right in the middle.

    It sure does matter, bigger things can take much more damage. How do you not get this yet? Why do you think the big guys like Kahli, and Big Show often end up in spots where they can sustain extreme amounts of damage before they get taken down? It's simple science, size greatly affects the amount of damage that needs to be done to someone in order to get the desired effects.

    This is if Deadpool isn't fried, cooked, smashed, squished, or chewed up. If you are only two true options to winning are standing onto the top of the horned head of a dragon or throwing grenades into the mouth that can spit out 50 foot jet stream flames then your chances of winning are going to go down drastically.


    Again, you're only hope of truly beating this dragon goes down to if Deadpool can land enough damage into the eye to cause enough damage to equalize the fight in his favor, and if he is lucky to land grenades into the mouth of a fire-breathing dragon, and if he is lucky to land an attack outside of his bulletproof hide.

    All the Dragon needs to do is breath fire onto Deadpool, smash his claw into him, swallow him whole, or throw him around. Deadpool's healing factor would take a while when he is charred to the bone, or chewed up like a wad of gum. Thus giving the dragon the win. Know the best part? The dragon has the strength, and the speed to do whatever is needed to catch and trample Deadpool.

    Yes, either of those are the only true way to beat a dragon that is built like a tank, flies at insane speeds, and can burn down an entire village with a single huff. Magic, a plan, or even both is to even capture and subdue the Horntail, let alone kill it.



    Because Deadpool is a fucking moron, that's why. Deadpool doesn't think like a regular mercenary, or a trained solider, he thinks like well, well like Deadpool. He runs into a fight with his swords in his guns, and if neither of them works he spends the rest of the fight getting his ass kicked or running away. Has he ever been able to think of an alternative method of attack when he fought Squirrel Girl? Or Daredevil, or even Punisher? Hell whenever he fights anything his guns and swords can't kill he ends up being smashed and squished like an ant.





    Right, good thing the Horntail is from a book. Not a videogame, it wasn't written to have a weakness. And it won't grow one to support your shitty argument. Stop trying to compare apples and oranges here and get a grip. The Horntail is not Bowser, or Colossus, you can't beat it unless you have a well assortment of spells and a trap to subdue it. Neither of which are Deadpool capable of doing.



    Does Deadpool have an extensive knowledge on how to kill Dragon's from a book he most likely never read? I would also like to point out in the bio that Deadpool doesn't even know what Deadpool is going to do next. He is unpredictable and acts on impulse. Both of which will get you killed against a monster that out-powers in every single way fathomable.




    It is only an underdog story if Deadpool actually has a slim chance of actually beating or even subduing the dragon in the first place. But he doesn't have the knowledge, training, or magical talents to subdue a dragon.

    What realm of your ass did you get that number? At this point you are letting your macho man tough guy act get in the way of any rational thought. Take a deep breath and go abuse that poor midget neighbor of yours or something.



    No, we are talking about small arms weapon fire onto a dragon that has skin impervious to it. You are seriously over-estimating Deadpool and under-estimating the durability of a 50 foot dragon.


    None of which does Deadpool have the strength and the speed to accurately place onto the limited places he would have to hit to cause any real damage. I doubt by the time Wade pulls out a mini-gun and winds it up he could live to talk about when the Horntail just squashes him.




    What part of "Deadpool doesn't think like normal people" don't you understand? He's not smart, he's not bright, and he is hardly anything of a field general or a tactician. Hell, I would put your nephew among the long list of people that are actually smarter than Deadpool.



    See what I mean with this macho man tough guy act? I get enough mother jokes in the Bar Room to even let this phase me.

    Again, completely off-topic. And besides unless you are Frank West, a ***** is not a weapon and can't be pulled out of Deadpool's magic satchel. Maybe actually use an argument where Deadpool can use abilities to realistically cause enough damage to beat a dragon instead of trying to prove something to yourself.




    According to Tournament rules, the fighters know nothing about each other until they actually face off. So using logic, Deadpool would not know about Darth Vader and his involvement in the tournament. Hell, I don't think there has ever been a time he ever had a lightsaber. And if he did, then I would be supporting him. But here you go again and base your argument on something that just flat out isn't possible of happening.


    No you didn't, you wanted an easy way out and decided to pull out a lightsaber in a desperate attempt to protect your bravado so everyone thinks you are this macho man tough guy. I explained why the damage to his eye would not do enough damage to subdue a dragon but you constantly choose to ignore it.

    I don't even know why I am acknowledging this. But I just want to say that you are trying too hard to look so bad and tough by calling me kid, insulting my mother, and constantly contorting things to help your completely absurd argument for a guy who has no realistic way of winning this match. You are trying too hard to look cool and it only ends up being thrown back in your face as some ass-hat who resorts to petty name calling and mother jokes to support his argument. Maybe if you slung less mud, paid attention to details, and remember the fact that Deadpool has never been able to beat anyone bigger than him then maybe you wouldn't end up looking like a tool.




    I'm going to ask you a couple questions. And I want you to think really hard before you answer them.


    1.Despite the Horntail's bio stating he is impervious to all muggle weaponry? What would be big enough to actually cause damage?
    1a. Would Deadpool be able to use the weapon without being weighed down by the weight of the weapon from a dragon that moves as fast as a small plane?

    2. Despite only having only such limited options to attack, would Deadpool be able to accurately use the big guns to hit those spots before the fast, 50 foot tall dragon lays down his claw, chews him up, or burns him to a crisp?

    3. Would it be considered a loss when Deadpool is regenerating his body while inside the belly of a dragon?


    I'll do you a favor and give you the answers to that.

    1.No
    1a. No
    2. No
    3. And actually, yes.


    Deadpool doesn't think, he acts. When you face a Dragon, that is for all intents and purposes, an unstoppable, godless, killing machine, you need a game-plan, some magic spells, and hell maybe some extra wizards on your side if you plan on even hoping to subdue this brand of Dragon. If you think your shitty insults and your tough guy attitude will ever change that fact than you are even more hopeless than I thought.
     
    #51
  2. nightmare

    nightmare ...7, 8, Better stay up late...

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    Im not even going to read all that because im sure it just spews the same lame crap you say over and over. Yadda, yadda, 50 ft tall, yadda, eye too big, yadda, Deadpool is dumb, etc.

    Ill do us all a favor and hit on some points cuz I got time to kill before Sons Of Anarchy starts....


    1.)Dont use Jose's name to name drop. It wont score you points.

    2.) Flash is dumb. So dumb he was dead for many years and no one cared, most didnt even notice. I dont have time to battle ******s in every thread. I pick and choose because I have a job and family. But for you, dear, I will make some time....

    3.) Macho Man? Now there is someone that could beat a dragon with a Slim Jim and an elbow drop. Dig It!



    Water? Great idea! Maybe a super-soaker filled with liquid maalox? Fire breath has indigestion.

    Well, it just so happens he can grab something large\powerful enough to do damage. He can grab any weapon he wants. Go ahead, pick one. I chose quite a few already.



    Sounds alot like your dragon friend....

    I guess that only works for the dragon cuz Deadpool is just gonna get "serial-crushed by some huge friggin guy". Thanks Detective Greenly but im gonna want a bagel with my coffee.



    In addition to the biology\anatomy lesson I was teaching you, I was trying to teach you some math. Its called ratio. The ratio to the toothpick and you are roughly what a sword would be to the dragon. Your welcome, but I dont think you are paying attention. Stay after class and write an essay on the economic structure of Europe.



    To a certain degree, the larger an animal\person, the harder to take down. The exceptions? The same vital, vulnerable parts they all share despite the size- Eyes, throat, pressure points, nuts, brain, etc. You can poke Show in the eye just as easy as a Sin Cara and it still does the same damage- despite the size difference.





    That is if he stands in the way of the fire. That is if he gets bitten. See, I can play the 'if' game also. You know the best part? Deadpool has the skills and weapons to do whatever is needed to take down this dragon.






    Except for the fact that the dragon already has weak points that are part of its anatomy. Doesnt matter if its from a book or game- the comparison is valid. The dragon is considered a 'boss'. The fact is that his size does not eliminate the vulnerable parts of his body from being attacked to win.





    How many times have we seen dragons and mystical creatures defeated because someone read a book on 'how to kill a dragon'?? Give me a break. They all have done the same thing- use what you got, hit its weak spots and kill the bastard. Its not rocket science, but by the way you cant comprehend this formula- it may as well be....

    Also, glad you read the Bio's. Did you read the parts where Deadpool is a trained mercenary, skilled with weapons and has a magic satchel? Oh, yea! Magic! One of the ways you say a dragon could be put down! A magic satchel Deadpool uses to grab any weapon he wants thus defeating the dragon using said weapon from his Magic Satchel! And his plan is to kill the dragon! Magic and a plan! Your two ways to beat the dragon, remember? Hell Yea, I win!






    Yes, in fact he does have those things.



    So now you side with Nazi midgets? Plus this shows you only pay attention to half of things. I defeated the Nazi midget and he is gone.

    Your welcome America.

    Also, its not a 'macho man tough guy' gimmick. Its a 'based in reality, science and rules of the tournament' gimmick.




    Again- he isnt gonna shoot at the armor. Pay attention.

    Regardless the size of an opponent, using the skills of the attacker and weapons available- Id say that there is a pretty good chance for success. More than your idea of Deadpool just standing around till he gets burned or serial-crushed....(ah, you know the rest.)




    If it didnt phase you, why take the time to talk about it? Id say what I am saying is working because you have turned this post into something Stormtrooper would create in a Jar Jar Binks debate..... Long winded and full of gems.



    Slow down inspector. Have you just described the exact thing I have been doing? Using abilities to cause damage? Why yes, you have been reading.

    And pray tell, what am I trying to prove? That Deadpool can win? Doing a right good job of that, I must admit. Getting under your skin? Thats easy. No magic or prep time needed.






    Ah, pay attention. Never said he knew Vader was here. Said the tournament was comprised of various characters. He might not know specifics, but am sure he is aware of that much. Also never said he had a lightsaber before. I said he has a magic satchel and can grab any weapon he wants. A lightsaber is a weapon. Therefore, point goes to me because it is possible. The part about breaking the 4th wall and liking pop culture is truthfull and obvious.


    That was within the rules and as ******ed as it sounds- it has merit. I wanted to prove the 'any' weapon point again since you so easily dismiss a valid part of his arsenal.





    Easy way out? I proved multiple times my argument has valid reasoning and you dismiss them because 'its a 50 foot dragon'. You you want to play dumb? Fine. I played right back at you with the dumbest idea I could think of. Use a weapon that your dragon cannot defend against with all his might no matter how ******ed it sounds. It worked. Lightsaber beats Dragon and its all legal sir.

    How exactly am I 'protecting my bravado'? Or whatever that you keep speaking of? Im using the rules and facts based on character abilities and science to back those statements. I thought that was what this is all about? Right? Use the bio's, make a choice and back up your statements. Just cuz my style pisses you off- its not 'macho bravado' it means your frustrated because I just might be right and you are wrong.



    You mad, bro? You look mad. Want a snack?

    "Deadpool, grab me a chimichanga, this guy has low blood sugar. He's getting all cranky. No, I dont have any change, just give me that one. I dont care if its your last one, this guy is going to fall out if he dont get a snack. Look at him- he has veins pulsating from the side of his head. Give me the damn snack."

    Here you go, kid. Eat this, it will make you feel better. Now what were you saying?




    Any weapon he can think of. Magic satchel and all. How much time ya got. I dont need to actually list every weapon do I? You get the point, I think.


    Yes he could use the weapon- he is highly trained with weapons. I cannot comment on the effect of gravity, though. We dont know where we are.


    Why does it have to be a gun? Why do you get to choose his weapon? Why do you get to ask all the questions? Where did that llama come from? Where are your pants? What are you doing to that poor creature?



    No. That actually works in my favor. If he gets chomped in half and eaten thats ok, because he is still moving. That means he wouldnt be dead or rendered unconscious\incapacitated and the match continues. So even in pieces, Deadpool can now blow up the dragon from the inside out. What a neato trick. Gets eaten which plays into your 'Deadpool is a moron' idea, and he still gets the victory using his weapons to defeat the dragon which was my idea. So, yeah- that works too. Good job, you just defeated your own argument. Congrats!
     
    #52
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  3. Matt1231230

    Matt1231230 Dark Match Winner

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    I must have missed the part in the rules which said you must act like a complete dick to other people when arguing your point -_- Some people take this thing way to seriously.

    Anyway, back on topic, have to agree with nightmare on the eyes being a weak point. The horntail, to my knowledge, has the same eye structure as any other animal, so of course it's going to be affected if you take its eyes out. Guns or swords might not affect other parts of the body, but they'll do the same damage to a dragon's eye as a human's eye. Without it's eyes, the horntail is going to be pretty fucked up and out of control, and I doubt it'll even be caring about Deadpool as it deals with the pain.
     
    #53
  4. GI Cake

    GI Cake Thank God For Sodamy.

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    Let me lay this down nice and easy for everyone, but this wall of text is just flat-getting too old for me.

    Deadpool is a trained killer, no doubt about that. But he has never shown any tactical awareness or even any hint of using a plan like Captain America or Cyclops. The only reason why he has survived for so long from his recklessness and insanity is all due to his healing factor. Deadpool compared to just about anyone noteworthy has dismantled him, defeated him, or just flat out destroy him. Deadpool's lack of any actual rational thinking has costed him to lost more fights with more hero's and villains's than most people to count. This is a man who does not think before he acts. He's going to see the dragon, shoot at it, and when he realizes his bullets do not affect the dragon's hide he is going to try his swords. Why would he try his swords? Because he is an irrational moron that no amount of special op's training can ever change that. And when he gets in close he is going to get chewed up, or burned to ashes.


    If Deadpool was this rational thinking man that you are making him out to be Nightmare, then how come he has lost to very beatable enemies in the past? Squirrel Girl was eating away at him but he was too stupid to realize his own healing factor was kicking in. He underestimated Daredevil which resulted in him getting his arms pulled out of their sockets. And Punisher shot him in the face. Deadpool doesn't think, he acts, and when he acts, he gets his ass kicked. Maybe if you were to put Deadpool against pretty much half of the human's section in a handicap match, he would win. But he is facing a dragon, he's never fought a dragon (to my knowledge, hoping Justin can verify that) but if he fought the dragon the same way he fought his previous enemies (which he will) he is going to end up stewing. He is going to lose, no other way around it. No fancy weapon and no attempts at his minor weak-points is going to change that.
     
    #54
  5. nightmare

    nightmare ...7, 8, Better stay up late...

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    I win. You said only 2 ways he could beat the dragon and well, first part is exactly what you asked for- Magic and a plan.

    Second part was your idea. Deadpool gets eaten and blows up the dragon from the inside out. He might be dumb but he can pull grenade pins. He is self destructive and crazy. He would do just that. Plus, the dragon cant regenerate- Deadpool can. Your plan failed.


    Deadpool wins.
     
    #55
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  6. GI Cake

    GI Cake Thank God For Sodamy.

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    His satchel doesn't actually count as a magical weapon. It's a tool that he uses for storage of his weapons. Unless that satchel pulls out how to perform a spell capable of fending off a dragon I fail to see how it can be used as a weapon.

    Oh, and if the plan is running in guns blazing at a dragon, you're going to lose. That is the only real plan Deadpool is capable of thinking of.

    Exactly, Deadpool is eaten, game over, dragon wins. Deadpool doesn't actually have to die but be unable to partake in the fight. It is hard to fight while being digested by a dragon. Thank you for understanding. :)
     
    #56
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