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Pre-Show Stalwart
As I sit to write this, Donald Trump has just finished his victory speech. I will grant that he was cordial on message and reasonably sincere in his tone. Nevertheless, waves of disappointment crash on the shores of my thoughts as I lay words to page. First is the stinging irony, the sight of Donald Trump walking off stage to the words "you can't always get what you want." But secondly and most disheartening, is a comment I just read from one of my regular viewers who said that I had helped to create this. That this was the rationalists among us, pushing back against the Social Justice Warriors. You are right, sir, that I helped to create the world in which we now live, however small my contribution my have been. For the last five years, my commentary has chewed the legs of the various tables of the modern left. Now I realize all too late that each and every instance, I won the battle and lost the war. So to all who wish to hear where I actually stand, hear me now. I believe that very few people start out identifying as Libertarian. It is a movement consisting largely of persons who have become disillusioned with one of the two major political parties, and as such, even within Libertarianism, you have Left and Right wing factions. In my case, I came into Libertarianism after becoming disillusioned with the Modern Left.
What had begun as noble causes, equal rights before the bar of law and a push to uplift the downtrodden, had now become the playthings of a generation of posh, spoiled brats whose tantrum throwing, wailing was a pale echo of the fiery rage that fueled their activist forefathers, where once we freed slaves and struggled for civil rights, we now indulge the whining of affluent Black college students who had looked forward to playing activists as though it were some extra curricular school tradition like the prom. Where once we had championed women who had made bold strides in the world, we now handed out worthless Social Science degrees to a legion of perpetually aggrieved Starbucks baristas. It was this dissent of the Left into the abyss of self-parody that rendered it unable to fight back against the commanding presence of Donald Trump. This was no more evident than in the fact that the Clinton campaign had prepared a lavish victory celebration, while the Trump campaign was uncharacteristically conservative and cautious of counting their eggs before they hatched.
The Left had taken its newfound power and prestige for granted, assuming that their views were self-evidently correct and that they needed to offer zero intellectual support for them. Their arrogance and hubris created a real-life tordus and hare scenario, leaving the Far Right to take the lead while they stopped for lunch. So how did the Left dull its knife to such a degree that it was tepid and blunt against the sabre-rattling of Donald Trump? It was when you decided to occupy Wall Street because you couldn't stand the fact that some people had more than others so you wanted the government to step in and re-distribute the wealth, like the school teacher that made me give out my handful of pencils to students that had forgotten to bring their own. It was when you declared that Blacks couldn't be racist, and women couldn't be sexist. Don't try to hide behind your academic jargon about power structures, that was just you trying to tell your chosen enemies that you had the right to do whatever the hell you want, and they had to shut up and take it, and you know it. It was when you decided to snub women, gays and other minority groups in this country to protect the lunatic behavior of an extremist religion that still operates of medieval principles of conduct.
It was when you demanded that our colleges and universities be reduced to glorified day-care centers for a student populous so delicate that they demanded the head of the professor who dared to contradict their mad cap hysteria. It was when you decided that while women's groups could hold massive international conventions, hosted and bankrolled by whose who of Hollywood and Washington elites. The prospect of a small handful of men convening in a classroom to discuss issues related to their struggles, was just too much for you to tolerate. It was when you decided that women's portrayals in video games was a great civil rights issue of our time. It was when you let a bunch of pampered upper-middle class princesses convince you that hearing mean things on the Internet was a "form of physical violence", and it was when you let a pansy-assed wastrel of a film director convince you that seeing his crummy widget of a remake was an act of political solidarity. It was all this and countless smacks in the face that alienated you from the overwhelming majority of Americans. So when it time to stand up to a real bully, Donald Trump, you were powerless. For eight years, you danced on the graves of those who had suffered and died to bring you real social progress, and you have squandered the legacy of social impact they left you with, by complaining about non-issues like what kind of Halloween costumes white people were wearing. Madalyn Murray O'Hair, Martin Luther King, Jr., Gandhi, and many other people who advocated actual social progress, had left you with a tool-kit of social impact to help protect us against the onslaught of a tyrannical madman like Donald Trump, and you squandered those tools on nonsense.
Why was this country unfazed by Donald Trump's grotesque treatment of women when it should have been his downfall? Because it had grown weary of your endless demands of mass flagellation every time some affluent bimbo encountered a moment's unpleasantness. Why did Donald Trump's xenophobic views on race relations not send off the kind of National alarm bells they should have? Because you spent eight years kicking white people in the balls for the mere fact of their existence to such a degree, that you succeeded in stoking the fires of White Nationalism. You were trusted to be the guardians of a proud legacy of inclusivity and compassion, and standing up for the underdog, and you squandered it, like it was a genie that granted unlimited wishes.
Make no mistake, Hillary Clinton should have been the next President of the United States. No, I did not vote for her, nor did I encourage anyone else to. I used whatever influence I might have to encourage votes for Gary Johnson in hopes that he could break the 5% threshold needed to make Libertarians the next major party. But as a part of the National narrative that we write in the ongoing history of this country, it did make sense that the first woman would follow the first Black president. As John Oliver so accurately stated, "If women's hundred year march were a video game, it does seem appropriate that Donald Trump would be the final boss". Yes, I realize that Hillary is corrupt. Of course she's corrupt. She's a politician which means she's corrupt by default. Look at the word Politics. Poli means many and Tics are blood sucking leeches. I'm not speaking from a policy standpoint, but from a storytelling standpoint, the story of the United States will remain blemished because of the Left's irresponsibility. All you had to do was carry yourselves with dignity, and you could have had your woman President. History could have been made, instead you acted like shrill child harpies for nearly a decade and then turn to the American populous as though their election of your history-making candidate was a matter of course to be granted at the snap of your fingers.
If you, The Left, ever want to win back power, you will have to let go your high and mighty belief that you know what's best for everyone, and that you speak on behalf of all people. Far too many demographics have grown tired of being expected to act as your step and fetch it every four years at the voting booth, while you ignore and condescend to them the rest of the time. Donald Trump could not have been an easier target to knock down, but eight years of the Left bloodying the noses of the American people over completely asinine minutiae, made you impotent to act when it mattered. That is why I lost faith in the Left so long ago, it was a disillusionment so profound that I was willing to throw in my lot with the Far Right to effect what I thought would be necessary change. That decision ruined my life, and has forced me to rebuild one day at a time. I saw on a micro-level what will now take place on the macro, and to the Left, I impart this message: "Look at the bullies on the Alt-Right, look at the smug, self-righteous pricks shaking their dicks in everyone's faces, and realize that for eight years, this is what YOU were!" So stop being that.
When a new group springs up to challenge your stated positions, don't stage mock interviews with your friends to make it sound like you're talking to an objective person that can easily put these wily upstarts to rest. When people call you out on your bullshit and have objective proof to back it up, don't prevaricate, own up to it! And for god's sake, take people at their word when they tell you what their stated position is. When someone tells you, "I have a problem with X", don't come back with "Well that's just because you secretly hate Y and don't want to admit it". Be the bigger person, love your enemies, do right by those who hurt you, treat others the way you want to be treated, finally, learn the lessons of history that got us to this point.
And in closing, an observation to the Right Wing. Stop saying the people have spoken. Your candidate did not win the popular vote. Hillary did. All that Trump did was exploit the glaring flaws in our election system and win the Electoral Vote. And the Electorate, made up largely of representatives from a party that is intensely hostile, are under no obligation whatsoever to vote for him. You think you have this in the bag? You don't.
Kind regards
Homer Simpson
What had begun as noble causes, equal rights before the bar of law and a push to uplift the downtrodden, had now become the playthings of a generation of posh, spoiled brats whose tantrum throwing, wailing was a pale echo of the fiery rage that fueled their activist forefathers, where once we freed slaves and struggled for civil rights, we now indulge the whining of affluent Black college students who had looked forward to playing activists as though it were some extra curricular school tradition like the prom. Where once we had championed women who had made bold strides in the world, we now handed out worthless Social Science degrees to a legion of perpetually aggrieved Starbucks baristas. It was this dissent of the Left into the abyss of self-parody that rendered it unable to fight back against the commanding presence of Donald Trump. This was no more evident than in the fact that the Clinton campaign had prepared a lavish victory celebration, while the Trump campaign was uncharacteristically conservative and cautious of counting their eggs before they hatched.
The Left had taken its newfound power and prestige for granted, assuming that their views were self-evidently correct and that they needed to offer zero intellectual support for them. Their arrogance and hubris created a real-life tordus and hare scenario, leaving the Far Right to take the lead while they stopped for lunch. So how did the Left dull its knife to such a degree that it was tepid and blunt against the sabre-rattling of Donald Trump? It was when you decided to occupy Wall Street because you couldn't stand the fact that some people had more than others so you wanted the government to step in and re-distribute the wealth, like the school teacher that made me give out my handful of pencils to students that had forgotten to bring their own. It was when you declared that Blacks couldn't be racist, and women couldn't be sexist. Don't try to hide behind your academic jargon about power structures, that was just you trying to tell your chosen enemies that you had the right to do whatever the hell you want, and they had to shut up and take it, and you know it. It was when you decided to snub women, gays and other minority groups in this country to protect the lunatic behavior of an extremist religion that still operates of medieval principles of conduct.
It was when you demanded that our colleges and universities be reduced to glorified day-care centers for a student populous so delicate that they demanded the head of the professor who dared to contradict their mad cap hysteria. It was when you decided that while women's groups could hold massive international conventions, hosted and bankrolled by whose who of Hollywood and Washington elites. The prospect of a small handful of men convening in a classroom to discuss issues related to their struggles, was just too much for you to tolerate. It was when you decided that women's portrayals in video games was a great civil rights issue of our time. It was when you let a bunch of pampered upper-middle class princesses convince you that hearing mean things on the Internet was a "form of physical violence", and it was when you let a pansy-assed wastrel of a film director convince you that seeing his crummy widget of a remake was an act of political solidarity. It was all this and countless smacks in the face that alienated you from the overwhelming majority of Americans. So when it time to stand up to a real bully, Donald Trump, you were powerless. For eight years, you danced on the graves of those who had suffered and died to bring you real social progress, and you have squandered the legacy of social impact they left you with, by complaining about non-issues like what kind of Halloween costumes white people were wearing. Madalyn Murray O'Hair, Martin Luther King, Jr., Gandhi, and many other people who advocated actual social progress, had left you with a tool-kit of social impact to help protect us against the onslaught of a tyrannical madman like Donald Trump, and you squandered those tools on nonsense.
Why was this country unfazed by Donald Trump's grotesque treatment of women when it should have been his downfall? Because it had grown weary of your endless demands of mass flagellation every time some affluent bimbo encountered a moment's unpleasantness. Why did Donald Trump's xenophobic views on race relations not send off the kind of National alarm bells they should have? Because you spent eight years kicking white people in the balls for the mere fact of their existence to such a degree, that you succeeded in stoking the fires of White Nationalism. You were trusted to be the guardians of a proud legacy of inclusivity and compassion, and standing up for the underdog, and you squandered it, like it was a genie that granted unlimited wishes.
Make no mistake, Hillary Clinton should have been the next President of the United States. No, I did not vote for her, nor did I encourage anyone else to. I used whatever influence I might have to encourage votes for Gary Johnson in hopes that he could break the 5% threshold needed to make Libertarians the next major party. But as a part of the National narrative that we write in the ongoing history of this country, it did make sense that the first woman would follow the first Black president. As John Oliver so accurately stated, "If women's hundred year march were a video game, it does seem appropriate that Donald Trump would be the final boss". Yes, I realize that Hillary is corrupt. Of course she's corrupt. She's a politician which means she's corrupt by default. Look at the word Politics. Poli means many and Tics are blood sucking leeches. I'm not speaking from a policy standpoint, but from a storytelling standpoint, the story of the United States will remain blemished because of the Left's irresponsibility. All you had to do was carry yourselves with dignity, and you could have had your woman President. History could have been made, instead you acted like shrill child harpies for nearly a decade and then turn to the American populous as though their election of your history-making candidate was a matter of course to be granted at the snap of your fingers.
If you, The Left, ever want to win back power, you will have to let go your high and mighty belief that you know what's best for everyone, and that you speak on behalf of all people. Far too many demographics have grown tired of being expected to act as your step and fetch it every four years at the voting booth, while you ignore and condescend to them the rest of the time. Donald Trump could not have been an easier target to knock down, but eight years of the Left bloodying the noses of the American people over completely asinine minutiae, made you impotent to act when it mattered. That is why I lost faith in the Left so long ago, it was a disillusionment so profound that I was willing to throw in my lot with the Far Right to effect what I thought would be necessary change. That decision ruined my life, and has forced me to rebuild one day at a time. I saw on a micro-level what will now take place on the macro, and to the Left, I impart this message: "Look at the bullies on the Alt-Right, look at the smug, self-righteous pricks shaking their dicks in everyone's faces, and realize that for eight years, this is what YOU were!" So stop being that.
When a new group springs up to challenge your stated positions, don't stage mock interviews with your friends to make it sound like you're talking to an objective person that can easily put these wily upstarts to rest. When people call you out on your bullshit and have objective proof to back it up, don't prevaricate, own up to it! And for god's sake, take people at their word when they tell you what their stated position is. When someone tells you, "I have a problem with X", don't come back with "Well that's just because you secretly hate Y and don't want to admit it". Be the bigger person, love your enemies, do right by those who hurt you, treat others the way you want to be treated, finally, learn the lessons of history that got us to this point.
And in closing, an observation to the Right Wing. Stop saying the people have spoken. Your candidate did not win the popular vote. Hillary did. All that Trump did was exploit the glaring flaws in our election system and win the Electoral Vote. And the Electorate, made up largely of representatives from a party that is intensely hostile, are under no obligation whatsoever to vote for him. You think you have this in the bag? You don't.
Kind regards
Homer Simpson
