Is Underage Sex As Bad As It Seems?

Discussion in 'The WrestleZone Symposium' started by SSJPhenom, Jan 13, 2016.

  1. SSJPhenom

    SSJPhenom The Phenom of WZ

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    Before I go into the points that I want to make, let me tell all of you a story.

    My sister who is 14 has a best friend who comes over all of the time. His name is DJ. He's also 14 and he's gay. So last night, I over hear the two of them talking and DJ exclaiming how he's ready for a serious relationship; including sex and the whole 9 yards. After hearing this I think to myself; "It's time for me to join in on the conversation and set this boy straight (no pun intended)". So I do. I tell them both all of the societal norms that you always hear. You're too young, you're still kids, you have all the time in the world, live your lives, sex is dangerous, I know you think you want this stuff but, and so on. My sister seems to listen and soak it up, which I love because I'm not ready for her to get to that point. DJ, on the other hand, retorts and begins to tell me his story and how he feels.

    As I said, DJ is 14. According to him, he's been having sex with boys since the age of 8 and with men since last year (age 13). He wants a steady relationship and has been going out recently with a 21 year old guy who he met online. Now in my eyes and more importantly the eyes of the law, DJ's partner is a pedophile and DJ is a victim of child abuse and statutory rape. That's not how DJ sees it however. "I want a boyfriend", DJ says. "It's my choice. No one's abusing me. Why should we be treated like criminals?" Again, I tell him all of the societal norms. You don't know what you want or what you're doing, this guy is only after sex with boys, he doesn't love you, blah blah blah. I find myself talking to DJ as if he's a child. In the eyes of the law, he is a child and that should be enough. Is he really just a little kid though? He assures me that he is not just a child. Plus, his sophisticated gay image makes him look older than 14. I mean, he comes across as bright, articulate, sure of himself, and above all else, mature beyond his years. It's hard to imagine anyone getting away with taking advantage of him.

    So we continue to talk (honestly this is the best conversation that I've had in years and it's with a 14 year old) and we get to the law breaking part of his relationship. DJ is concerned with the law, which in Nevada states that men over 19 who have consensual sex with guys under 18 are classified as dangerous sex criminals on par with child rapists. After serving their sentence, they would be required to register their address with the police for minimum of five years and could have their identity revealed to the public. Needless to say, this is a huge problem for DJ. Not only because his current partner is 21, but because he prefers older guys as opposed to guys his own age. He said: "I don't like guys my own age. They're too immature. I like men in their 20s to early 30s. They are more experienced and serious. With them, you can get into a closer relationship than you can with a teenager." Now I had him. "If other guys your age are too immature for serious relationships, what's the difference with you", I asked. "If they're too young for that sort of thing, aren't you?" "No", he said almost angrily. "Not all guys my age are immature like that but most are. Some kids mature faster than others." He continued with: "I don't consider guys who's balls have dropped as mature. I'm talking mentally mature. Some guys around my age have jobs and help support their families while still being on the honor roll at school. Yet the law still says they're too young." "The law is stupid", he exclaimed. "If I know what I'm doing and I'm not harming anyone else, I should be allowed to be with whoever I want."

    Although I still have plenty of doubts, he has a point. If nobody forced him to do something he didn't want to do. If he wasn't tied down, drugged, or beaten. If he truly wants to be with an older guy and he truly understands the gravity of what he's doing and the consequences; is it wrong? Same goes for women and straight people in similar situations. I used to think that underage relationships were wrong no matter what. Was I wrong? I'm not saying that people go out and find an attractive 15 year old and get them to say yes or anything like that, however, if an underage teenager is truly in love with an older person, they understand everything that is going on, and they are a willing participant in the relationship; is it still wrong?

    What do you guys think? Underage relationships are wrong no matter what? Depends on the situation? They're still kid? I'd like to know your opinions on such a taboo subject. I told DJ that I'd be posting this topic on here, so please be respectful.
     
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  2. #tamale

    #tamale Marry me Billie Kay!!!

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    Forget about the moral implications of the situation;

    There is your answer right there. It's dangerous. Just a couple of months ago police arrested a guy in Ohio (I think) who charmed a 14 year old girl and then held her captive and physically abused her.
     
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  3. Hyorinmaru

    Hyorinmaru Sit Upon The Frozen Heavens
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    I can't believe this is a question.

    YES

    YES IT IS!


    I'm not even going to get into the legal ramifications and I'll try to keep the majority of my beliefs out of it.

    Underage implies that they are still children. They haven't developed their bodies fully, they aren't emotionally ready for sex and they don't really have a concept of what sex actually entails outside the physical body movements.

    There's the teenage pregnancy factor. I like to say babies shouldn't be having babies. I know some adults that shouldn't have had children much less children having children. Then there's the STD factor. It's always an issue and I can't even imagine what these diseases would do to a developing child's body.


    No matter which way you look at it it's a horrible idea.
     
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  4. George Steele's Barber

    George Steele's Barber Advertise Here $9.95/month

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    Assuming I take DJ's opinion as fact it makes sense that we make a law that protects children since they are mostly immature.

    No DJ, the law makes total sense and you explained why perfectly in the quotes above. Without the law, all those immature children could be victimized without repercussion making it far more likely those children will be victimized.

    Does DJ want that? Can DJ wait a few years to help protect others? DJ sounds selfish like an immature child. Maybe DJ should check his ego and realize that he may be doing more damage to himself than he knows.

    They are not wrong no matter what but it doesn't matter because they are far from necessary. The law makes total sense and what those men are doing with DJ is and should be illegal.

    That all being said, please ask DJ what he has done to help free Jared from Subway?
     
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  5. J.J.

    J.J. Mid-Card Championship Winner

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    Before I go into this, I want to know if this 21 year old that DJ is involved with is known by his parents? It'll underline which direction I want to go in with my response.
     
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  6. SSJPhenom

    SSJPhenom The Phenom of WZ

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    Only DJ's mother is in the picture. I've met her once, she's a really nice lady and seems to be a good parent. She knows DJ is gay and that he has a boyfriend. She thinks that the boyfriend is 18, however, as DJ is afraid of what his mother might say or do. She's shakey on the idea of his boyfriend being 18. Idk if she's met him or not though.
     
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  7. jacdnwarrior

    jacdnwarrior Championship Contender

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    Depends on what we're talking about. Teens with teens, not wise, but not illegal (at least I don't think). What you're talking about here, is an adult having sex with a child. That's illegal, I have no problem with that and think it's best that way. That being said, I wouldn't be surprised if it were commonplace. I think a teenager has the ability to say no to a person propositioning him/ her, but I wouldn't recommend it.
     
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  8. J.J.

    J.J. Mid-Card Championship Winner

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    Dating older people does not necessarily translate they're more mature. In theory it just means that person is older than you. I just think with the mother not knowing that he's playing with fire, especially if there's some fear of how she may react to the real age. What happened to the days where people would just enjoy their youth? If this person is mature for his age and understands the law, then he wouldn't put his partner in this position and if his partner was thinking level headed they wouldn't put themselves in this position.

    As pointed out, statutory rape is a crime. The law in that sense isn't measured by how mature both sides are. As a parent myself I see no gray areas in that. We're talking about an adult and a child that's either a freshman or sophomore - way too big of an age gap. Regardless of maturity DJ is still a child in the eyes of the law.

    Dealing with kids in their teenage years is so perplexing. It's like they're going through this inevitable sense of belonging. I don't know his partner or him for that matter but in his eyes it's probably idyllic, probably dreamy, in reality typically is more often a disaster waiting to happen on so many levels. I understand his supported reasons for wanting an older person but why would a 21 year old want someone that young?

    Unfortunately in situations like this, chemistry doesn't have rigid age boundaries. But overall it's not an equal relationship. He's older, I assume he's working, has a car - a level of independence that DJ hasn't reached yet. The older partner is naturally going to feel he has more power - especially in life experiences, age and financial stability.

    If he was my son(DJ), I'd hear him out and why he wants to be with an older person. But as long as he's underage and living under my roof I don't have to reason with it - being that the partner is older and deemed more 'mature' I'd reason with him, to get him to see it from my perspective. He wouldn't have a choice honestly - but I would go that route first. If he chooses not to abide then I'd get the law involved.
     
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  9. Mustang Sally

    Mustang Sally Sells seashells by the seashore

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    And the law includes even those minors who are more mature (at least sexually) than many of the 32-year-old men they get involved with. There are 14-year-old girls out there who are anything but innocent, and in fact initiated the whole affair with the older guy......but when her parents find out and report it to the police, the girl is going to act like an innocent little waif, crying that this big bad man 'forced' her to do whatever they did.....and the guy is sunk no matter how much he protests that she initiated it, which she did.

    Unfortunately, society doesn't take a realistic look at what a 'minor' is. They regard a 17-year-old as being just as blameless and unsophisticated as a 6-year-old. That's complete garbage, but it's the law.

    If a person of age wants to take a stab at an affair with an underage person because he/she doesn't agree with the law, they'd better know what they're up against if caught.

    And remember, if you get involved with a child, it's not as if you're in the clear if the girl doesn't say anything about it for a week or two. They might suddenly be struck with the horrible memory 30 years later.....and the law will be only too happy to prosecute. Ask Bill Cosby.

    Regardless of your feelings on the subject, if an 'underage situation' comes up, better to follow the law and keep your hands off. In fact, it's better to not even look at her cross-eyed.
     
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  10. Stone Cold Tea

    Stone Cold Tea Getting Noticed By Management

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    At 14 you do not know what you want. You can be manipulated into doing things.. How many people know about DJ being gay?

    21 year old with a 14 year old is illegal in the eyes of the law. Now I don't always follow the law but theres some stuff you just don't do.

    The fact DJ says he only likes older guys is more than likely born out of the fact he is with one at the minute but that could have serious ramifications when he gets older if he can't sustain a relationship with people his own age.

    Also if this came out I can more than bet that there will be some issue with people bullying him when he goes school.

    At the end of the day man you need to report this dude.
     
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  11. HORRORHOLIC

    HORRORHOLIC Pre-Show Stalwart

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    If it's illegal than of course it is. Anyone above the legal age has any right to have sex with whoever they want, but a 13 year old having sex with a man in his 20's is completely wrong no matter what.
     
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  12. Poop Master Flex

    Poop Master Flex Mid-Card Championship Winner

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    A lot of mental maturity is needed within a person to make a statement like this stand ground and at 14 I have serious reservations that DJ is smart enough to make these decisions, stand behind them and live with them for the rest of his life. I question if he's smart enough to know the ramifications of having a relationship with someone 3 years removed from high school when he at best is just starting high school. He may think he's smart enough, he may think he's got it all together but it doesn't sound to me like he does at all, he sounds like so many other teenagers I've met who think they know it all until reality slaps them in a face down the road.

    It sounds to me like he wants a serious relationship so bad that he will do anything and I mean ANYTHING to get it even if it means putting himself in danger. From reading your post Phenom it really sounds like he just wants a relationship and he isn't putting too much thought into who he's dating or what could potentially happen to him as a result. He's not thinking about the other side of the fence, he's not thinking things like why in the hell would a 21 year old want to go out with a 14 year old when he could most likely date a person who is legal? Could this guy be a creep? Could this guy be dangerous? Is he a pedophile? If we get caught what are the ramifications? Is he manipulating a 14 year old because he can? How will this guy react if I decide to break up with him?

    I'm just saying everything you've said all revolves around him "doing what he wants" and "it's between him and that guy", I didn't see one word spoken about who this guy is and what's he like. He sounds like the 9 year old "Whateva, I do what I want" girl from that South Park episode.

    Overall though, a 21 year old has NO BUSINESS being with a 14 year old. I don't care how mature that 14 year old is, if they are actually stupid enough to put themselves in that situation then they obviously aren't mature enough (both the 14 and 21 year old). This dude could be very dangerous and as much as DJ and your sister might hate it the best course of action is most likely getting the law involved. I agree there's a lot of laws that are stupid but laws like this exist to protect kids from themselves because as smart as they think they are their brain isn't fully developed and they don't have enough life experience to understand all the avenues.

    You tell me man, what is the right thing to do here?
     
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  13. SSJPhenom

    SSJPhenom The Phenom of WZ

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    I believe the right thing to do is what I have planned to do Saturday. Which is when DJ comes over, his mother and I are going to go out for lunch and I am going to tell her everything that DJ has told me and I'm going to let her decide on what the best course of action might be. At the end of the day, DJ is not my kid nor my family and getting myself involved by contacting the police is something that I'm not going to do. Not only because I don't feel its my place to make that decision but also because I don't want my sister to lose her best friend because of me. My sister is at that age now where she doesn't want to tell me things and she shuts me out more and more. I don't want that. I might not be her father but I am her guardian and I don't want her to feel as if she can't come to me with anything.
     
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  14. jacdnwarrior

    jacdnwarrior Championship Contender

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    By telling his mother what's going on, you are getting involved. There's nothing wrong with that, he is a child and he is exposing himself to risk through his behavior and something has to be done. I might suggest that you encourage him to speak to his mother himself, but I doubt he'll do that. Perhaps encourage his mother to seek counseling with him and/or individually. If he has been doing this since the age of 8, we could be looking at parental neglect here and maybe even authorities might need to be contacted. Your heart's in the right place but you must be prepared that your actions in helping DJ might not be well received, initially, if at all. Prepare yourself for being hated for doing the right thing and trying to save this child. Best of luck to you and DJ.
     
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  15. Reflection

    Reflection is a happier and wiser man

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    A rational 21-year old wouldn't ethically want to get physical with a 14-year old. But to the guy's defence, when you love someone, and that person insists you to make love with them, probably every other day... you will eventually give in. You wouldn't want to hurt your partner every time (and teenagers get hurt easily) by saying stuff like "I can't do this, you are too young," or "Let's wait four more years." It will just destroy your relationship. In that case, you have to make a choice between ethics and the person you love, and it's hard to pick the morally high ground. Also, not all days are similar; there will be times when you would want to be physical... and during times like these, it will be tougher to resist the urge, especially if you have committed the act before and it didn't feel bizarre or wrong after it was over.
    Phenom, bro, if you haven't talked to his mother yet... don't keep an aim in mind. You have decided to let her know, and that's where your role ends in the matter. Don't say things like "you know, it's wrong and it's illegal..." or make her react the way you want her to react. Anything more, and you will be doing more than splitting the two. The 21-year old would be f***ed, we all know that, the 14-year old would be badly hurt emotionally, that is something you will have to think about as well, and your sister would keep matters (even those involving her) away from you because you are not someone that listens and suggests, but someone that reacts the very way that the person confiding in you doesn't want you to react.
    Anyway, good luck to you, and do let us know how everything went.
     
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  16. Kodo Sawaki

    Kodo Sawaki Championship Contender

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    Yes, it is wrong. And its not just from the law point wrong(because it constitutes as rape), its wrong because before a certain age you dont get to decide whats right or wrong for you because you are not mature individual to make that call. You may think you are, but no you arent. I mean, cmon, he was 8 when he had sex first time and now he is 13 and thinks he is mature individual who can make calls on his own. :confused:

    Even if you disregard the law, its just wrong. Because nobody is that mature when he/she is 13-14 year old. Thats why your parents are responsible for you before certain age and thats why you have some guidelines when you are suppose to do some stuff. Because that guidelines do mean something and if you cross them you do that on expense of your own safety.
     
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  17. THTRobtaylor

    THTRobtaylor Once & Future Wrestlezone Columnist

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    This is crazy...

    He is a victim of Child Abuse... anyone who has sex with an 8 year old, is a Peado pure and simple and needs locking away. His reactions are different to the stereotypical guilt but still symptoms of the trauma. "Had that person NOT done what they did when he was 8, he might not be gay today" is a legit question that he should be asking.

    It's easier to be more cut and dried about it where its a young boy and a man. Where it's a hetero relationship however the waters do get more murky... how many of our parents and grandparents would have been seen as "Peados" by today's standards? My own parents would be, my dad was 18 and my mum 15 for a few more weeks when I was concieved, heard the story a million times... technically it was illegal but there was common sense used. They were in a stable relationship, my dad was earning and could support her and the parents on both sides, while not thrilled, accepted that they would likely have gotten married within a year anyway. Had she been 14 or lower, then yes, I'd be horrifed myself... but if it's reality it's reality. Laws are different everywhere and muddled... in the UK you can marry at 16 but buy a drink at the wedding... in some US places it's 15 but you can't drink till 21... yet you could legally have a 5-6 year old kid by that time...

    Today - it's not acceptable at all, but people need some perspective that this "norm" of aggressively penalising those who do this is in reality less than 25 years old and could yet disappear. I knew a girl at school who had kids at 12 with a much older man... he was never locked away, nor the kids taken away... Today both would happen, regardless of the trauma that would cause to the girl.

    The lad you're talking about needs help, now... it probably needs reporting if only because of the worrying nature of how it all started. At 14 he can't make that call... might piss your sister off, but ultimately it's a safeguarding issue... if that guy is in your house, you know, and don't report...it can come back on you. Even if he hates you it's better it gets dealt with now (being gay is fine, being abused since 8 isn't) and he can then get the help he needs to have a proper perspective on relationships...
     
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  18. SSJPhenom

    SSJPhenom The Phenom of WZ

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    I may not have been clear enough in my original post for this thread, however, he wasn't having sex with men at the age of 8. He was messing around with boys his own age and friends that would come over to his home or the ones he would go and stay with. Not men. Older guys didn't come into the picture until he was 13. I thought I mentioned that. I'm told that boys messing around with other boys is completely normal behavior whether the child turns out to be gay or not.
     
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  19. A11oftheLights

    A11oftheLights Getting Noticed By Management

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    When he was 8 he was having sex? That is all kinds of fucked, he's manipulating people to be doing that shit at that age. DJ's scenario is not right because the law says its not.

    As for scenarios involving two people who are both underage having consensual sex is fine. But as soon as someone is taking advantage of someone thats not on.
     
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  20. ShinChan

    ShinChan Gone. For. Good.

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    I am gonna say this in one word for you.

    WRONG!

    We all know its legally wrong! But more importantly its wrong emotionally, mentally & physically. The guy is just 14 and his mind is really immature. As much as he can say that he is mature, he is not. His body & mind is not developed enough for such a relationship.
     
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  21. M

    M ☆*:.。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆

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    You seem like you have a pretty good grasp on the situation here, Phenom. I think you already knew what all the replies would be in this thread, but I'll post anyway - my contract states 5 nonspam post per year.

    When you're young, you're damned good at lying. Not to other people mind you, but to yourself. Everything you do - emphasis on EVERYTHING - seems like the perfect answer to anything that comes across your path. There's a sort of mental disconnect with the rest of the world that you inevitably have, and it's one that is near impossible to realise while you're living in the moment. That's why when people get older, they often find things about their younger selves that make them cringe. Obviously you know where I'm going with this so I'll just jump to the personal anecdote.

    I was considered extremely mature growing up. It was the usual mix of "hey you're smart", "hey you don't come across as a doofus when you speak" and "holy shit I just lost an argument/chess/monopoly to an 8 year old" that no doubt DJ experienced. I also thought I was rather mature myself - noticing girls and being very conscious of it before primary school is something I like to rub in the faces of the "girls are icky" crowd from that era that I still hang around with (not that girls aren't icky, Jesus those creatures sometimes... :p ) - but I recently turned 21 (yay) and man does looking back on the things that someone as "mature" as I was make me shudder even today. They're not even things I majorly regret doing or anything, but there's an indescribable Sideshow Bob stepping on a rake moment inside my brain when I recall the stuff in my past.

    I guess the point of this post is to say to DJ - look, I know the adults around you do seem a little stupid sometimes, and yes you are probably more mature than most of them, but don't take that as an ego inflating "ha! I'm more mature than an adult!", instead try to realise that those adults are just immature and not the other way around. None of us can stop DJ from doing what he's doing, but the more stuff is said, the more things are likely to stick in his mind and that means he'll be able to think about it in a more in depth manner and possibly avoid cringing at himself when he gets older.
     
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  22. SSJPhenom

    SSJPhenom The Phenom of WZ

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    I'm with you there. I too look back and cringe on some of the things I did as a teenager. Honestly it makes me feel old and I'm only 27. Feels like a life time ago.

    Anyways, we postponed the lunch for yesterday instead of Saturday. We went to Magoos, a local bar that serves great food and his mother (Janine) and I talked. I explained what DJ had told me and the age of the boyfriend. She explained that she thought he was 18 and that she had met him and that he seemed like a nice young man. She asked what she should do and I said it was her decision and not mine. So she called the boyfriend (amazed me that she had his number and it reaffirmed my original opinion of her being a good mother) and told him to meet us at Magoos. I didn't think I should be there but she said she felt better with a man there, so I stayed. The boyfriend (I'm not going to mention his name) actually showed up, he has guts (I was going to say balls but it seemed inappropriate). So Janine explained her concerns and was real calm and level headed. I just sit there and nodded. Then came the question, do you love him? The boyfriend said yes and to throw another aspersion against DJ, the boyfriend thought DJ was 18 until about 2 weeks ago when someone posted something about DJ on Facebook. Of course he said that it was too late then, he had already fell in love. So Janine straight out asked him if he was sure he wasn't a kiddy rapist and the boyfriend said no and even showed us some of the texts where DJ was saying he was 18 and showed us DJs Facebook where he changed his date of birth and his online profile on the site where they met. It seemed like the boyfriend was a legit good guy and was innocent. So Janine said no more sex. They can continue to talk and hang out but no sex. He has a curfew of 9 and the first time that it's broken, they will no longer be allowed to see one another. He promised to abide by her rules and said thanks and left.

    I can't give an opinion on how I would've handled it because IDK how I would've handled it. The boyfriend really does seem like a nice young man. Has a job, is going to college, and what not. Janine says she did that so her son wouldn't hate her which I can understand, but I still don't know if what she did was right.

    What do you guys think?
     
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  23. J.J.

    J.J. Mid-Card Championship Winner

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    When it comes to situations like this, I disapprove of taking the "cool parent" route. Protecting my children is not a method of parenting where I'm going to be relaxed about. Especially while they're under 18. Career path is theirs to make, situations that are legally wrong are mine to make. We've all possibly have or will be in situations where love is blinding but DJ's partner should've thought about the consequences if he's ever caught or told on.

    To each it's own, I guess it's codemned as still being morally wrong. It's just too much of a liability as a parent to allow that. I still wouldn't allow it and it's based upon my opinion above. The mother is going to tell him "no sex"? If DJ lied to his mother about his age then he'll lie about them having sex. If neither DJ nor the partner are mature about the decisions they made then how does the parent expect him to be mature about her demands?
     
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  24. enviousdominous

    enviousdominous Behold my diction

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    While I read the OP's experience with this issue, I admit that I haven't read anyone else's response. I apologize in advance if I beat a dead horse.

    The law is in place to balance liberty and justice. There are laws meant to minimize the amount of harm done to our society by drawing lines in the sand where Congress decided it could allow for a certain amount of liberty while maintaining a standard of justice for those who may be victimized by those who abuse their liberty.

    In the case of a 14 year-old homosexual boy who demands that he be allowed to have a sexual relationship with someone who is over the age of 18, I think he should be denied that right. Obviously I don't know him personally, and I'd sound very foolish if I waxed on about the mentality of children when I'll be the first to admit that I find it impossible to relate to young people these days.

    It should be noted that the age of consent is all over the place in the US. It's my understanding that in Texas a 14 year-old can legally consent to intercourse.

    The only reason I would deny that young man the legal right to have a sexual relationship with an adult is because of the bad things that would come as a result of sexual predators having a legal right to coerce minors. There's more harm in legally permitting sexual predators to have the ability to prey on children than there is in making it illegal for a mature-beyond-his-years 14 year-old to share his affection through sexual intercourse.

    Over time, sex has come to represent more than just two people banging their privates together. People use sex as currency, or a way to punish or a means of asserting power over others. No matter what the reason for it; sex has consequences. Sex can be based solely on love, but it still has to be reasonably regulated due to the dangers it poses to a well ordered society. It stands to reason, in my opinion, that preventing underage sex is a necessary means of maintaining a well ordered society.
     
    #24
  25. Wrestlingaholic

    Wrestlingaholic Championship Contender

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    This is a very interesting thread, Phenom - incredible considering the initial reaction to most/all (myself included) would be: WRONG

    That said, it does pose some interesting scenarios. There is a footballer (soccer player) in England, Adam Johnson. He got charged last year with having sex with a minor (14/15 year old). Of course the reaction of fans was, 'paedophile, send him down'.

    Then the news broke that he had met this girl, who he had intercourse with only once, in a nightclub. Nightclubs in the UK have a minimum age requirement of 18. Then pictures of her surfaced on line. I swear to you, if she'd have said she was 22, you'd have believed her. Suddenly, Johnson's defence became a lot more sympathetic.

    It sounds from your story that DJ looks and acts a lot older than his 14 years, hence why the boyfriend was duped. So, whilst it still is technically dubious, the ball then falls in DJ's court. He claims he is mature, yet three things stand out that contradict this statement.

    1) having sex since he was 8 - I'm sorry, that was plain wrong. I was aware of girls at 8 but wasn't sexually aware for another three years AT LEAST, and certainly no one at my age was aware of what anal sex was; but even if we were, it would be extremely rare to partake in sex at that age, Herero or otherwise

    2) his, "I want it so it shouldn't be wrong" attitude - extremely childish, how et he presents his arguement

    3) the very fact he is meeting men online and lying about his age

    All of this screams to me that he WANTS to be more mature; what DJ actually needs is to slow down and enjoy his childhood, as once it's gone, he'll never get it back. He's plenty of time to be an adult, including sexual relationships, but for now he needs to enjoy things a teenager should be, not rushing things that could actually lead to longer term emotional damage.
     
    #25
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