I’m solidly in the middle when it comes to the series finale of How I Met Your Mother, as I neither loathed it like I’ve seen so many say, nor did it find it to be tremendously satisfying. Rather, it was an emotional hour of television that swung to give viewers a satisfying conclusion to the show, but could only hit a fly ball to the warning track.
One of the ways I think the show went terribly wrong in the finale is how they handled Barney and Robin, and their divorce. Yes, these were two people with extreme commitment issues, and people with commitment issues need a partner with a strong mooring, the ability to pull their other back before they slip away. Neither Robin nor Barney was capable of being that for their partner, so it’s easy to understand why they divorced. It’s just a disappointing thing that while it was made clear that Ted would meet the mother at the wedding, the final season spent much of its time devoting itself to Barney and Robin’s wedding. Yes, they showed these commitment issues even to the day of the wedding. Robin, propositioning Ted to take off with her, then when he turned her down, fleeing the church. If not for the mother’s intervention, Robin likely would have left. Barney’s attempt was more backhanded, claiming that he didn’t have the perfect tie, but it was an attempt to flee himself. I suppose it’s not a surprise that the pair didn’t work, their first attempt at a relationship did not either. But to have them marry in the penultimate episode of the show, with future Ted Mosby giving the beautiful speech about how Barney and Robin had “vowed to love one another, and as human beings, love is the best thing we do”, only to have them divorce halfway through the first episode of the final hour was a tremendous disappointment. And even though it became apparent that the two of them would not work, especially after Barney knocked up #31, I still held hope that they would reconcile. There was too much investment in the final season in the wedding and their relationship for it to be pushed aside so fast.
Speaking of #31, I wonder if it was Bays and Thomas’ idea to make Barney seem despicable in the end. While some viewers may argue that it was the same Barney we’ld gotten the entire show, it wasn’t. He seemed to have turned a corner in the final season, and despite what appeared to be just pre-wedding jitters wound up being the inability of both to fully commit, he seemed to have changed. But his behavior worsened upon his divorce from Robin, as he went from shooting for sleeping with 7 women in 7 nights to 31 women in 31 nights. And true, no man wants to find out from a one-night stand that they knocked them up, but could Barney have acted more defeated? This was one thing that the show had made clear that Barney did want, a child, and it happened to be the one thing that Robin couldn’t give him. Still, did Barney have to essentially push Robin out of the group by “hitting on every ****ty cop” at the rooftop party? The viewer could make the argument that it was a way of compensating for Barney, but it seemed so unnecessarily cruel. And having Barney cycle through 31 women in 31 nights before getting one pregnant was probably the worst way the show could have gone about giving him a child. And despite his apparent desire for one, he was depressed on learning he was having a child,though the delight he showed in fatherhood, and the way he lectured the two young women who came into the bar showed that perhaps, fatherhood was the best thing for him. And it couldn't have happened with Robin, and Barney could give far more to a daughter then he could to Robin. I didn't like the divorce, but the finale left Barney in the best possible place.
As for the mother, the way she was treated was the worst of all. This was obviously the plan from the start, as Ted’s two children were the same age they had been when the show started 8 seasons ago, and they were pining for their dad to move on to Aunt Robin. The show, however, was called ‘How I Met Your Mother’, not how ‘Ted and Robin wound up together’. But from the dress, age, and reaction of Ted’s children, this was the plan all along, apparently. And for this viewer, it was a foolish one. Yes, the children were correct: The story had hardly been about the mother , it had been about Ted and his friends. For me, that made the moment Ted finally found the one, a kindred spirit, which Tracy truly was, even more important. But the show quickly cycled through that, having shown only a few moments of bliss(and Ted making a tremendous sacrifice to his career to be with Tracy). They rushed through the wedding of the two people who were supposed to be the focal point of the series, and skipped quickly ahead to Tracy’s illness and death. I did like the tie-in with the umbrella, though I never guessed how significant the umbrella would be to the pair getting together. And throughout the show, most of Ted’s relationships seemed to be with women he simply wasn’t suited to be with. If anyone needed a win, especially post-Stella and forward, it was Ted. And Ted got a win when it came to finding the mother, as they seemed uniquely meant for one another. Her death wasn’t shocking, why else tell the story in the first place? But it felt cheap, an end around to get Ted and Robin together without Robin having to(not that she was able) become the one thing that was a deal-breaker for her: Having kids. But it did show the incredible commitment, and truth in Ted’s words when he said that the moment he met Tracy, he knew he would love her forever. Losing a spouse, I imagine, would be the worst loss of all. Ted’s not Barney, so I would never expect him to cope, however strong the grief, by going out after conquests.
In essence, what I’m saying is this. Six years told the viewer how important and beloved the mother was to Ted, but the part in which the finale cheated was in not showing us how important she was to him. She simply wasn’t a presence in his life long enough to be portrayed that way, even in the heartbreaking death-bed scene.
Marshall and Lily felt like background players more then anything in the finale, as they were mostly the comedic elements of the episode. I’m ok with that, because their relationship was the focus of a good portion of the show, and it was structured as a relationship that was solid. There was little ground left to cover with them, and other then the pronouncement of Lily being pregnant with her third child, nothing else from them was really needed, other then some comedy. Marshall declaring that he was running for State Senate and would be called ‘Supreme Fudge’ soon was a great line. When in doubt, bet on Jason Segal to deliver.
In the end, I’m ok with Ted and Robin being together. Do I like the way they got there? No. But it felt right. Ted was the one who went and retrieved the locket for Robin. When Robin was panicking on her wedding day, it was Ted she wanted to see. Of course, we find out later that she wanted to run away with him, but Ted had always been that stabilizing consistency in Robin’s life. When Robin found out she couldn’t have kids, it was Ted who forewent going back to Cleveland for Christmas, and made a spectacle of lights and gave Robin a shoulder to cry on. Robin, a nightmare in regards to commitment, could find no better partner in Ted. This is best spelled out in how long he waited, and only pursued her after being urged on by his children. For every person, grief is subjective. Each of us may experience the same loss, such as both children did with the loss of their mother. But I guarantee that each grieved differently, and as both cycled through the stages of grief, they reached the point of acceptance at different times, and differently. Both acceptance of their mother being gone, but acceptance of their father being with another woman, namely Robin. As for Ted, it showed the level of commitment and love he was willing and able to give to a woman, and that’s exactly the partner that Robin needed. Someone who would love her through everything, and could offer her such a strong commitment. As I said, a person with commitment issues needs a person who will fight and battle for a relationship before the other slips away. Barney and Robin couldn’t be that for each other.
Ted, in the six years he spent single following the death of the mother, showed that he could be exactly that for Robin. His appearance outside her apartment with the blue French horn showed that, as he had felt towards the mother, his love for Robin had been true from the first time he had laid eyes on her. His grand gesture of stealing the horn had been proclaimed as one of love for Robin. It's just that through the years, that love had grown into friendship and now that Ted had worked through his grief, it was apparent there was romantic love there for Robin. Just like the yellow umbrella was what drew Ted and the mother together, it was fitting that the horn was what Ted showed up with outside of Robin’s apartment, as it was from their first date when Ted blurted out "I love you".
While it mattered how they got there, at the same time, it didn’t. That’s the crazy thing about love. It’s not rational, and it doesn’t make sense. How I Met your Mother is a show I’ll miss, and while I didn’t like some of the ways they got to their ending(Cristin Milioti especially got a bad deal), the ending itself felt appropriate. Ted’s children had been right. The story hadn’t really been about the mother, it had been about Ted and his friends and their adventures.
And once Ted and Robin both worked through the issues that plagued them from their first marriages, the timing was right for them to be together. Perfect scenario, perfect world? No chance. But it's a real one in the world in which we live. If HIMYM had simply been "just a comedy", it would have felt completely wrong. But the show incorporated so much drama in its eight seasons(Marshall's dad's death, Stella leaving Ted at the altar, Barney meeting his dad, Robin finding out she couldn't have kids, etc.) that labeling it simply as a comedy would be a misnomer. At its heart, it was a drama that incorporated some very funny elements that worked well together over its eight seasons.
