Always Bet On Duke - The Duke Nukem HQ

Discussion in '1st BattleZone Tournament (2011)' started by The Doctor, Aug 31, 2011.

  1. The Doctor

    The Doctor Great and Devious

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    "Those alien bastards are gonna pay for shooting up my ride."

    With these iconic words, one of the coolest, baddest, and most macho videogame characters of all time exploded onto the scene and into the hearts and minds of gamers everywhere. With his cocky personality, massive array of weapons, and striking good looks, Duke Nukem solidified himself as a badass among badasses. The game was great fun, too!

    I'm making this thread so I can throw my support behind the Duke to win the Normal Tier. Come on, he's fought aliens, robots, mutated policemen, and gigantic triple-breasted alien ****es - Who in this tourney can stop him?

    The Duke is a man's man, with a man's arsenal. Look at his weapons:
    • Pistol - His trusty golden pistol may be weaker than the rest but it has a high rate of fire that works like a charm.
    • Shotgun - Groovy! The shotgun is Duke's other stable and can dispose a Pig Cop in three hits. In Duke's hands this thing is a merchant of death.
    • Chaingun Cannon - Come on, it's a machine gun! Fires off tons of rounds per second, though it goes through ammo quickly.
    • RPG - Duke's rocket launcher can reduce the toughest foe to little fleshy charred bacon bits. Low ammo, but what it lacks in capacity it makes up for in deadly force.
    • Pipe Bomb - Remotely detonated, though these do have a high blast radius. If Duke hides well enough he could escape the blast, but with one of these in their belt loops his opponent is going everywhere fast.
    • Laser Trip Mine - Ah, now we're getting to the fun stuff. The laser trip mine detonates when someone crosses the path. Stick a few of these to a wall and unless the opponent can disarm them they're toast.
    • Shrink Ray - Low ammo, but if a blast from this baby hits you, you have about ten seconds before going back to normal size, and five seconds before Duke's foot is the last thing you see.
    • Freezethrower - Sub-Zero hasn't got SHIT on Duke's Freezethrower. One blast from this and you'll be left out in the cold, allowing Duke to ball up his fist and shatter you into a million pieces. Ice is nice!
    • THE MIGHTY FOOT - And if all else fails, Duke has his trusty big boot, ready to kick some hero ass.

    So look at that list. There's no one who could defeat Duke and his arsenal. He's got this thing in the bag and he'll do it with style.

    Hail to the king, baby!
     
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