WZCW presents: The All Stars Show!
We are live at the O2 Arena in London for the first ever WZCW All Stars show! The crowd is sold out with a raucous 80,000 strong crowd, yelling loudly. The camera pans around taking in as many fans as possible before a loud voice booms over the tannoy.
Welcome this evening, your commentary team!
With massive pyro, Titus emerges to the first big pop of the evening and as he makes his way to ringside, he playfully interacts with as many fans as possible. He takes his seat and put on his seat as he waits for his colleague.
“Guys, I’m delighted to be here tonight and even having this man next to me is not going to spoil it, please join me in welcoming my broadcast colleague to the arena.”
Constantine stands and poses at the top of the ramp as more pyro explodes by his sides. He slowly strolls down to ringside and is arrogantly enjoying the negative attention showered on him by the booing crowd. As he reaches ringside, he spies Titus and shakes his head. When he reaches the desk, he ignores Titus’s offer of a handshake and puts on his headset with a broad grin on his face.
“Finally the real star, a real man and the true face of WZCW has arrived.”
“John, Austin Reynolds says hi. As Ty Burna and Showtime. All of whom would have done a better job but I asked for you to be involved because I think you would provide a great insight.”
“Well I'll try to appreciate that sentiment Mask boy. Now should we do our job and call this show?”
"We should! What's the first match already?"
The following match is scheduled for one fall!!
Making his way to the ring.... HE IS THE ONE AND ONLY....THE GRAND MYSTIQUE
Titus: Here we have the one time only dream match. That's right viewers,Grand Mystique has made his way back into the WZCW ring for one final match.
The lights go out and Headstrong by Trapt begins. Then as the lights come back on, GM is standing on the top turnbuckle in the ring hitting his chest.
Constantine: Yes Titus this is one of the matches I was looking forward to.
And his opponent!!! BROSKI SMITH!!!!
Broski Smith walks out in his Florida Gators jacket and sunglasses on. He looks down his nose over the top of his glasses at GM and scoffs. He rubs his hands together doing a few arm stretches as he walks down the ring with lots of swag and a cocky grin on his face. As he gets into the ring under the bottom rope GM jumps down from the top rope and gets in his face. He doesn’t say anything, but shakes his head. The ref comes over and breaks it up and talks them down. He throws his arms into the air and the bell rings.
Titus: Well a little bit of bad blood between the ring vet and Broski Smith here.
Constantine: It sure looks that way, it's either win or Die for GM. I know that much.
Broski smith takes off his sunglasses and throws them to the side. He puts his arms out and shoves GM. GM backs up and runs off the ropes and at Broski. Broski grabs his arm and spins around throwing him into the ropes once again. GM flips over and hits the rope, then flips again going for a back handspring elbow smash. But Broski Smith drop kicks him right in the middle of the back, dropping GM to the mat.
Constantine: Look at that! That was a brutal kick.
Titus: Yeah.... That's kinda why I said wow?
Smith walks over to GM who is writhing on the middle of the ring. He is holding his back, but as Broski walks up and grabs him by the head he quickly turns around his leg and tries to get in an Ankle lock! GM rolls down and tries to hook his boots in. But Broski kicks him with a monster right boot. GM groans as his head hits the mat, he is trying to keep the Ankle lock sunk in. But Broski slips right out of it.
Titus: Jeez, ummm GM might want to find out if he still has dental insurance. Broski Smith just rocked him.
Broski backs off and drops back to the corner. GM gets up slowly and peruses his opponent. He grabs his arm trying for an Irish whip. But Broski overpowers him and flings him into the other corner. On the way back GM stumbles and Broski Smith winds up and hits The KICK!!! Right to his Jaw. Smith drops right after GM hits the ground and goes for the pin.
And your winner is BROSKI SMITH!!!
Titus: I wonder if he is any relation to Sam Smith?
Constantine: WHO CARES! He just won his first match in WZCW over Grand MYSTIQUE!
Titus: Maybe John Smith too...
Broski Smith is in the corner after getting his hand raised and GM is looking up at him with disbelief. The ref is helping GM up when he pushes him away and yells for a mic. A ring tech hands him a mic and GM checks the bottom to see if it is on.
GM: No, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! I will not be beat like this!!! YOU CHEATED, I WILL NOT GET SCREWED THIS TIME!!! I want another shot because you cheated!
Broski agrees by shaking his head and the ref rings the bell again.
Titus: Sweet, another match.
Constantine: It doesn’t get any better than this.
GM runs to Broski and locks down an arm in a Russian tie. He switches over and grabs around his waist and runs him to the corner. He backs up and rolls backwards, hitting his finisher The Hand of Prophecy! He lets go of Broski and runs up to the turnbuckles and climbs them with his arms raised as if he has won.
Constantine: YES! Show him who’s boss GM!
Titus:Huh, wait.... What?
Broski Smith no-sells the move and gets up and walks to the corner of the ring. He grabs GM by his boot and pulls him down. He shakes his head and hits The Kick again!! Right in the corner! He drags him out to the middle of the ring dropping down and covering him for the pin. Again....
And your winner by pinfall....again....Broksi SMITH!!
Titus:Well that was strange, why didn't he go for the pin after hitting the Hand of Prophecy.
Constantine: Maybe he's related to Dallas Smith, or even Will Smith!!
Titus:Will Smith is black!
Constantine: I know, but they have the same last name!
We see S.H.I.T. backstage in a corridor on the way to the ring.
“Initiating PROMO MODE......Initiate........”
He stops as he stutters along.
“Initiate.........Initiation failure..........Initiate Match Mode......”
S.H.I.T. starts to make his way slowly again.
“Match Mode initiation......Success.”
Harrys: The following contest is a fatal fourway match scheduled for one fall.
Titus: Well this next one’s going to be something else.
Constantine: The collection of human beings, and I use that term loosely, for this next match will be incredibly varied.
The Robots hits the arena and S.H.I.T begins to make his way to the ring.
Harrys: Introducing first, Scale Humanoid Industrial Technology: S.H.I.T!
As S.H.I.T begins entering the ring, Fear begins.
Harrys: And next; Erik!
There is strobe lighting flashing all over the arena and after 52 seconds of waiting, a spotlight hits Erik with bottle of disinfectant in hand. He sprays frantically, before reaching the stairs where he begins ascending them. Then, we hear Sabotage by the Beastie Boys.
Harrys: Entering the arena at this time; Saboteur!
The lyrics of the song hit and out comes Saboteur, pyrotechnics and all. We show the ring where Erik is now whipping down the ring posts, making sure they’re clean. S.H.I.T is simply observing for the moment. Saboteur slides into shot and begins to pose on the turnbuckle as Too Many Guys plays.
Harrys: And finally; Mr. That Guy!
Mr. That Guy walks down the ramp, exchanging high fives with some of the audience members before walking up the ring steps. He attempts to get into the ring, but he falls victim to Erik’s disinfectant, which is sprayed into his eyes. He falls out of the ring and clutches his eyes in sheer agony.
Titus: DISINFECTANT TO THE EYES! DISINFECTANT TO THE EYES! BAH GAWD I’VE NEVAH SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS BEFORE!
Constantine: Why are you yelling?
The referee signals for the bell and we’re underway. Erik goes to the outside quickly to go after Mr. That Guy. He begins to snatch That Guy’s glasses, cleaning them frantically from a cloth he’s pulled out of his ring jacket. S.H.I.T and Saboteur are still in the ring. Saboteur shrugs his shoulders, bounces off of the ropes and does a diving cross body over the top, landing on top of Mr. That Guy and Erik! Saboteur rolls and stands tall over both his fallen foes. S.H.I.T has yet to move since getting in the ring. Saboteur begins to pander to the crowd. They begin to cheer in approval. That Guy is down and his glasses are smashed. Erik is slowly stirring. Saboteur goes over to Erik and pulls his ring jacket over his head. He begins hitting him with a flurry of strikes before culminating with a devastating high knee. Erik falls backwards. His jacket also falls away from his head, with the contents falling out of the jacket. His nose is bleeding. Erik notices this and panics. He frantically searches among his various cleaning and disinfecting bottles and wipes. He clutches at his nose, and begins to run backstage, in the hope that he can get his nose fixed. Saboteur high fives some fans at ringside as the crowd begins to chant; SAB-OT-EUR! SAB-OT-EUR! SAB-OT-EUR!
Titus: Looks like the fans here are very much behind Saboteur.
Constantine: These blood hungry buffoons! Poor Erik could have a broken noise, and with his obsession with cleanliness, that will only accentuate the problem.
That Guy has finally come to, holding what remains of his glasses, he can barely see, but he knows that his glasses are destroyed. An angry look develops across his face and he charges at the nearest figure. Luckily for him, it’s Saboteur. A takedown and That Guy is all over Saboteur, pummelling him away with vicious fists and forearms. That Guy is essentially assaulting Saboteur. Saboteur is covering up, but some blows still strike him. The referee steps in to try and bring some order, but That Guy, believing him to be another one of his opponents, swings and takes down the referee! That Guy then stomps on the referee a few more times before getting dropkicked into the steel ring-post! Saboteur rolls him into the ring, goes up high to the top rope and comes off with a double axe-handle. Saboteur then turns his attention to S.H.I.T who hasn’t moved an inch. Saboteur gets in S.H.I.T’s face, but still it doesn’t move. Growing frustrated, Saboteur slaps S.H.I.T. An “oooooh” is comes from the crowd. Saboteur continues to trash talk S.H.I.T, but he’s soon stopped by a right hand from S.H.I.T. Saboteur responds with a right hand of his own. S.H.I.T returns to favour. The two begin exchanging right hands. The crowd cheers in support of Saboteur and boos S.H.I.T.
Constantine: So that machine actually can do something. Who would’ve known?
Titus: It appears that it copies its opponent’s moves.
Constantine: That’s either ingenious, or incredibly stupid. We’ll wait to see the result before deciding.
Saboteur bounces off of the ropes, and goes to deliver a dropkick, only to discover S.H.I.T is doing the same. Both take each other down with simultaneous dropkicks. The referee, S.H.I.T, Saboteur and Mr. That Guy. Everyone is down. There is about ten seconds of nothing happening when suddenly, out comes Erik! There is a large bandage plastered across his nose. He runs down the ramp, climbs the apron and springboards off of the top rope, coming down on Saboteur with a double stomp. With new rubber gloves on, Erik picks Saboteur up and hits him with a variety of kicks and brings him down with a big kick to the back of the head. That could possibly do it, but Erik has noticed there is no referee. He eyes dart around, realising that he can do extra damage to his opponents. Erik leaves the ring and grabs a steel chair. His folds it up and begins to the wipe it down with disinfecting wipes that he left behind before. He slides into the ring and prepares to swing at Saboteur, but is taken down with a big kick by S.H.I.T. The chair falls into the clutches of Mr. That Guy, who has finally woken up again. He realises what is in his possession and swings the chair at the nearest figure who just happens to be S.H.I.T. He strikes S.H.I.T hard with the chair, not realising that S.H.I.T is a robot. That Guy celebrates and poses for the crowd who give him a mixed response of sympathetic cheers and boos. S.H.I.T gets up very quickly. S.H.I.T takes the chair out of That Guys hand, spins him round and nails him hard with the chair. That Guy is now bleeding. But it doesn’t stop there as S.H.I.T pick That Guy up and smashes him skull first into the chair with That Guy’s own finishing manoeuvre; The Running Canadian Destroyer! There is a gasp from the crowd.
Constantine: Remind me to never cross paths with S.H.I.T.
Titus: Don’t cross paths with S.H.I.T.
Saboteur and Erik are both up and are very wary of the foe they have in the ring. Meanwhile, the referee has just begun to get back into the ring. Some medical staff rushes to ringside to tend to That Guy. Erik and Saboteur look at one-another and nod. They slowly begin to creep up on S.H.I.T. But it’s no use as S.H.I.T notices them and swiftly turns around. Saboteur bounces off of the ropes and delivers a clothesline to S.H.I.T. It has no effect as S.H.I.T goes to do a dropkick of his own, but is met with the springboard kick from Erik. Saboteur looks surprised, almost resigned to his fate, this costs him as Erik hits him with the running enzuigiri. Erik goes to the outside, opening his wipe-box, producing a soaked sponge, putting it into his hand. He gets back into the ring preparing to deliver the Mandible Claw to Saboteur. However, S.H.I.T puts his arm around Erik, applying it to the germaphobe! Erik desperately struggles against the hold but begins to fade fast. S.H.I.T has brought Erik to the mat. The referee gets into position to count the pinfall on Erik. 1...2...NO! Saboteur has smashed S.H.I.T with the Death Blow! Saboteur covers Erik. 1...2...3!
Harrys: Your winner of the match; SABOTEUR!
The crowd cheers loudly for the announcement of the winner. Saboteur starts to pose when he notices that S.H.I.T has begun to get up. He hastily exits the ring, but continues to interact with the crowd as he exits. Erik rolls out of the ring, and the referee exits too, leaving S.H.I.T alone in the ring.
Titus: A fantastic victory for Saboteur here after a violent and bloody match.
Constantine: The winner may be Saboteur, but the real “All Star” is that violent piece of mechanical design that stands tall in the ring.
Backstage, we see the Masked Knight stretching in preparation for his match later tonight. In a split screen, we see Nemesis who in contrast is hunched over in the corner of his room. The camera closes in and Nemesis notices it. Instantly he turns, lashes out and knocks it to the floor.
"Get out you fools!!!"
Harrys: This contest is scheduled for one fall.
The Nite-Liters version of the Theme from Shaft bellows out as Jack Sax enters the arena. The crowd reaction is strongly positive as woman can be heard shrieking. Sax’s got a smile a mile long on his face as he starts to strut to the ring. He stops and notices two lovely ladies in the front row. He stops and seductively winks at them, kissing their hands, continuing to chat with them.
Harrys: Introducing First, Jax Sax!
Titus: It would appear that Mr. Sax is already lucky tonight.
Constantine: Lucky? I’d suggest he was scraping the bottom of the barrel there.
Sax continues to chat up the lovely ladies, not even acknowledging the over fans at the announcement of his name. Then, Tank! blasts out across the arena.
Harrys: And his opponent, Action Saxton!
Saxton begins to march down the ramp as Sax continues to chat to the ladies at ringside. Saxton stops and looks at Jax Sax. A look of confusion has appeared on Saxton’s face. Saxton taps Jax on the shoulder. There is no response. Saxton does it more thoroughly this time, making sure to grab Sax’s attention. Sax turns around, annoyed. Saxton smashes him in the face with a powerful right hand. Sax goes down, only for Saxton to lift him up again and smash Sax’s face off of the guard-rail. Saxton pushes Jax away with his foot so that the ladies may focus their attention on him now. He rips his shirt off like he normally would in the ring, exposing his manliness. He returns his attention to Jax. By this point, Jax Sax has managed to get back to him feet, struggling to get into the ring. Action helps him into the ring by shoving him in. As Saxton climbs into the ring, the referee signals for the bell to begin the contest officially.
Titus: The match hasn’t even started yet and already we’ve seen some love and some violence!
Constantine: What we saw there was a criminal act, he assaulted Jax Sax.
Titus: He did warn him before he hit him John.
Constantine: Don’t call me John.
Sax is stumbling all over the ring, totally unaware of his surroundings, before clattering into the ring ropes. Saxton whips Jax off of the ropes and across the ring before catching him with a devastating karate chop. Jax is reeling as we see a shot of several ladies, unsure whom to cheer for. Saxton goes for a discus punch, but Jax ducks it and manages to grab hold of Saxton. He nails Saxton with a belly to back suplex. He returns to his feet to regain his composure and to show the ladies that he’s okay. He turns to look at the audience and spots another lady in the front row. He winks at her and she clutches her chest with delight. He smiles at her but falls victim to the Mongolian chop. After hitting both of Jax’s sides, Action Saxton spins Jax around, and takes him down with a rolling snapmare. Saxton signals that it’s all over, taunting the crowd, and showing his intent on delivering the Black Lightning. He jumps to make the drop even more impactful and everything slows down. BAMF! He nails it, Sax is done for as Saxton covers for 1...2...3!
The crowd cheers, particularly the men, for the victory.
Harrys: Your winner of this match; ACTION SAXTON!
Saxton returns to his feet and raises his hand in triumph before exiting the ring and returning to the two ladies that Sax was attempting to woo earlier on. Saxton jumps the rail and puts his arms around the ladies. They are delighted that Saxton is with them. The three of them exit.
Constantine: How disrespectful of Saxton not to stay and watch the rest of the show. The man is a true disgrace to wrestling.
Titus: Who could blame him with the prize he just claimed!?!
The following match is scheduled for one fall....
On her way to the ring, the 17th Wonder of the World, JAPAN!!
“Now this is my kind of woman.“
“I am not surprised by that Johnny boy.”
As Japan enters, the arena is stunned by how revealing her outfit is with two leather straps barely covering her cleavage. She sprints from the top of the ramp to the ring and shakes the ropes violently and that causes the whole ring to shake.
And her opponent, Sandy Deserts!!
“Now this girl is verging on perfection.”
“She thinks she is sand. She’s bat-shit crazy.”
Sandy Deserts comes out to a massive reception and she bounces down to ringside and hops over the ropes. Her infectious smile has brought the crowd to life and when she poses, she gets a cackle of wolfwhistles and cheers.
“Well I think it’s clear what the crowd likes.”
“Don’t listen to these people!”
Immediately Japan powers Deserts into the corner. Deserts tries to force her off but she is squashed by the awesome chest of her opponent. Japan whips her into the opposite corner and hits it with so much momentum that Deserts rebounds across the ring. Japan goes to throw her up but Deserts drops down and catches her with a tornado DDT. Cover!!! 1....2...Japan kicks out and does so with much authority that Sandy is sent flying over to the top rope out to ringside.
“I think we need to forget about Sandy Deserts and get behind Japan as the face of this company.”
Japan shakes off the effects of the DDT and follows her. She picks her up by the hair and grabs her around the waist, locks in a bearhug and then slams her back first into the ring post. Deserts screams in agony as Japan stands over her. Japan silently puts her foot onto Deserts chest, stepping over her and putting all her weight on Deserts.
“This is so dominant by Japan thus far.”
She then picks her up and lifts her over her head with a military press and throws her back into the ring! Deserts lands on her feet. Slowly but with still some energy left, she runs off the ropes and dives through the ropes on the other side, she hits a massive spiralling hurracanrana. She twists around Japan and releases her headfirst into the ringside barrier!
Japan no-sells it and gets up straight away. Deserts looks petrified, Japan runs at her but Sandy shows incredible flexibility to Matrix-dive out of it. Japan runs into the ring post! Sandy then runs at Japan and goes to hit a bulldog but Japan blocks it. She drops Deserts down face first with a forceful wheelbarrow slam!
“Aww poor Sandy!”
“It’s all well and good to try and fight but if you get caught by those gorgeous muscular hands then she will snap you.”
“You would love to be in this match right now wouldn’t you?”
Deserts tries to roll away but Japan rolls her into the ring. She picks her up and drops her over the top rope. Deserts kicks her away but Japan only stumbles back one step. Another kick sends her further back and then Deserts jumps off and hits a big flipping neckbreaker!!! Cover! 1....2.....Japan kicks out weakly this time. Sandy heads to the top rope and steadies herself before leaping up into the air. She flips around, completing four elegant rotations before splashing Japan with incredible speed and impact.
“That’s the incredible Saharan Winds! Nobody hits a 1540 splash like Sandy Deserts”
She recovers quickly and hooks the leg! 1..........2.........Japan kicks out!! Sandy is devastated. With Japan still prone, Sandy goes to climb to the top rope again. But Japan pulls something from her pants and stabs herself in the arm with it and then she BULKS UP!!
“What the hell?”
Japan trebles in size and stands dominantly over Sandy on the tope rope who is petrified. Japan grins evilly and pulls out a breast implant and pummels her over the head repeatedly with it!!
“We have seen everything now!”
The crowd begins to chant “Chicken Fillet” as Sandy falls to the floor. With the simplest of ease, Japan picks her up, plants her with a pedigree and hooks the leg! 1........2.........3!!!
“Sandy’s not getting back from that.”
Your winner by pinfall, JAPAN!!!!
“That was a gutsy performance from Sandy Deserts but Japan pulled something dastardly.....”
“Japan did what Japan needed to do to win. She pulled everything out and it got her the win!”
“Say what you want but the he-she makes me sick. Now stop drooling John.”
The following match is scheduled for one fall.
Making his way down to the ring is the ROH, TNA, WWE and WWE WHC champion....from the Australian Outback it's Jared Bogle!
Titus: Just listen to that ovation, not even I can get that sort of reaction!
Constantine: I hate Subway.
Titus: Where is he?
Harrys: I guess Jared is running late. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome his opponent...Blayto!
Blayto enters the arena after a small pop of blue flame. He is wearing a large bloodied straight jacket. Another similar blue flash of flame goes off around him and when the flames go down he has the jacket ripped open. He drops the Jacket as he walks down the ramp and gets into the ring.
Constantine: Just look at the size of this guy, he's fricking insane as well.
Titus: I heard he was also a former felon, he spent time in jail. Just like that guy, what's his name, oh yeah Criminal Karnage!
Constantine: Never heard of him!
Harrys: Making his way down to the ring is the ROH, TNA, WWE and WWE WHC champion....from the Australian outback it's Jared Bogle!
Again there is a no show by Jared, who is apparently running late.
Click for Spoiler:
The crowd look in bewilderment as Constantine stands up to a podium that has appeared almost out of nowhere.
Constantine: MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE! I have just received an e-mail from the anonymous Raw General manager. I don't know why they e-mailed WZCW or why I'm paying attention to it but oh well. And I quote “Due to Jared's terrible time keeping in the past, I already had planned another opponent for Blayto just in case. Play the music."
Click for Spoiler:
Harrys: Making his way down to the ring, from Blue Valley and being accompanied by Benjamin Meldon, it is Mr Morality James Chillingham!
Titus: Oh things have really picked up here!
Constantine: Mr. Morality has no business being here and frankly
Both men are cautious to begin with and start to circle the ring. Looking intently at each other, Morality extends his hand into the air and waits for Blayto to do the same. As Blayto and Mr. Morality’s hand meets in the air, Mr. Morality lands a big knee to the gut, staggering Blayto. Morality picks him up to his feet and whips him into the ropes. As Blayto rebounds off the ropes, Morality sees his opportunity and hits a sidewalk slam. Blayto is in pain as Morality begins to work his back. With Blayto down, Morality manages to lock in a single leg Boston crab. The pain is visible on Blayto’s face as the lower part of his back is strained. Blayto, however, is too close to the ropes and manages to wrap his arm around the bottom rope. Morality is warned by the referee and immediately breaks the hold. Although the hold has been broken, it is clear that the damage has been done. As Blayto struggles to recover, Morality attempts to pick him up once more. As Blayto gets to his vertical basis, he begins to hit Morality with a flurry of kicks to the shins. Morality takes a few kicks to the knees and eventually backs off of Blayto. With Morality nursing his knees and lower extremities, Blayto hits a huge Russian Leg Sweep.
Titus: This is some matchup.
Constantine: I think this is Blayto's but Morality is surprising me.
Blayto hurts himself however as he lands directly on his back. With both men squirming in pain on the ground, Blayto begins to recover. Getting himself to his feet before Morality, Blayto begins to mount some good offence with punches to the chest. Morality is physically hurt and is clutching his chest with every passing blow. Turning away from Blayto in order to get some reprieve for his chest, Morality does not notice that he has left himself vulnerable from the back. Blayto pounces on his chance and sets up the Japanese Ocean Cyclone Suplex and attempts the pin. The referee falls to the floor and begins the first count of the match. 1...2... Kick out. Morality just manages to get his shoulder up as the referee’s hand is coming down for three. Blayto is shocked and his facial expression tells a story. Getting frustrated, Blayto begins to climb the turnbuckle. Morality has it scouted well however and launches himself at the top rope.
Titus: Blayto is clearly losing focus here.
Constantine: Blayto doesn't need focus to win.
Blayto comes crashing to the ground and lands on his back with devastating impact. Morality smells blood and moves in for the kill. Picking up Blayto, who is clutching his back in pain, Morality gives him an Irish whip into the corner. Mr Morality heads to the other corner and does a pose similar to Edge and Christians before a spear comes out.
Titus: I've heard legends of this, but never seen it with my own eyes.
Constantine: What is it?
Blayto turns round to face Mr Morality and then we have it. Hadouken. Blayto is incinerated into a pile of dust.
Harrys: The winner of this match due to Total Knock Out...Mr Morality!
A camera backstage is following a limping Sandy Deserts who is visibly physically and mentally devastated by the match against Japan. Jax Sax turns up behind her.
"Hey baby, seems like you had some bad luck out there."
"Did you see that chick-dick? It's so unfair! I'm a free spirit, I can't compete with....that"
"I know, I know look why dont we go and get a drink and I'll help you chill out some."
Jax slips her a sly wink and puts an arm around her.
We see the pair walking off as Jax's arm wanders from her shoulders down to her ass.
The following match is scheduled for one fall!!
On his way to the ring, Colby Congo!
“This guy is a weirdo.”
“He is a tremendous physical specimen.. He has muscles where you don’t even have skin.”
He runs out onto the entrance ramp and claps three times into the air with the pyro. He runs down to the ring, does a lap and then runs into the ring and does a sort of shitty tribal dance that earns him the ridicule of the crowd. Nonetheless, he seems very over with the fans.
And his opponent, Kaster!!!
“Now this guy is one hell of a talent.”
In contrast, Kaster shows no emotion in he walks to the ring.
“He is nothing but a dumb ex-bodyguard!”
"And your Mr Congo thinks he is the reincarnation of an African warrior? Look at the guy. He's lily-livered!"
Both men stand in the respective corners, not giving an inch. As the bell rings they step towards each other, Kaster poses arrogantly, pumping his biceps to a big boo. Colby steps forward and does the same but gets a great pop. Kaster gets in Congo’s face and shoves him down to the mat. Congo is up quickly and Kaster shoves him into the turnbuckle and then lamps him with punch after punch to the face.
“Kaster is a freak no doubt but he knows what he is doing.”
He backs off and then charges again but Congo drags himself up and boots Kaster in the face! Kaster is dazed and is powerless to stop Congo from hitting repeated open handed slaps to the chest. Kaster tries to back off but Colby picks him up and drops him with a massive body slam. Congo covers him, 1....2....Kaster fights out. Colby drops the elbow and then picks him up and then whips him off the ropes. Kaster ducks under Congo’s clothesline and then flattens Congo with a diving lariat of his own. Cover by Kaster, 1....2....Congo kicks out this time.
“Colby has so much heart and you can really respect how hard he tries.”
“And you say Kaster is a freak. Congo has no clue. I am surprised he can put one foot in front of the other.”
Kaster picks him up and with an immense show of strength, he lifts Congo above his own head in an impressive display of strength. With Congo still in this position, he pushes him up in the air and steps away, leaving Congo to fall to the floor from a massive height! Kaster follows this up with a massive kick to the skull. He covers again, hooking the leg, 1.....2.....Colby bravely fights out.
Kaster puts more boots into Congo’s chest but with each kick Colby unleashes a deep, guttural yell. Each scream gets louder and reverberates around the arena. Kaster gets desperate and goes to hit a suplex but Colby turns it into a suplex of his own. Kaster yells in pain and grabs his lower back. Colby grabs him by the neck and hits a powerful uranage backbreaker! Cover, 1....2....Kaster kicks out.
“Hello! This is some comeback from Congo!”
“Why is Kaster letting himself be thrown around like this?”
“He can’t do anything about this!”
Colby gets up, he screams again and he prowls around by Kaster who is slowly getting up. Colby whips him off the ropes and catches him with a massive belly to belly throw. Kaster is thrown so hard that when he lands shy of the ropes, he bounces, hits the ropes and rebounds toward Congo who chops him with authority on the top of the head. Kaster is dazed and stumbles around clumsily while Congo is dancing in an ecstatic kind of ritual.
“Oh this is pathetic.”
“Oh yeah baby, Congo’s dancing! Kaster is going down!”
Congo prances about and as Kaster collapses. Congo goes to the corner, still jigging all the way. He climbs to the top rope and flies off with the Superman frog splash
“Kaster's gonna get SQUASHED!!!”
The devastating impact flattens Kaster, leaving him lifeless on the canvas! Cover by Congo, 1.....2......3!!!
Your winner by pinfall, Colby Congo!!!
"How did the beefcake pull that one out!"
"Tremendous spirit. Colby Congo has it in spades and that got him past Kaster."
"Alright suck up."
Harrys: The following match is scheduled for one fall.
Harrys: Making his way down to the ring is John Doe.
Constantine: A true champion of the people John Doe is known worldwide in the pursuit of freedom. He is a true hero.
John Doe enters flanked by his "legion". He enters alongside a swarm on identically dressed, similar featured males. As he gets closer to the ring members of this swarm peel away and retreat backstage until only John Doe remains, it should be noted that John Doe is exactly like his picture on WZCW.com. He has no head and definitely no arms.
Titus: Oh come on he doesn't even have a head! The next guy is a true legend and frankly he needs no introduction.
Harrys: And his opponent...Fuel!
The crowd shout WHAT?!
Harrys: Sorry I meant Petrol!
The crowd all but stand to their feet in adulation, the referee and John Doe with noticeable boners. He walks slowly to the ring stopping every five seconds to throw his fist in the air.
Constantine: [COLOR="Red]Oh come on his entrance has lasted longer than my match with Chris Beckford! [/color]
Titus: Or my match with John Constantine!
Petrol has finally made it to the ring after a total of five minutes and 26 seconds. He gets into the ring and goes to shake the hand of John Doe, he then realises John Doe doesn't have any hands. He punches JD in the chest as he goes flying into the turnbuckle. Suddenly the lights go out and you can hear some loud sound effects. CRASH BANG WALLOP KAPOW and JISM
Titus: What the heck?!
Constantine: John Doe attacks from the shadows, if you've ever seen a match by him this is what he does.
The lights come on to reveal around the ring is the 'legion' in it Petrol is layout on the mat with duct tape keeping him to the mat. John Doe goes for the cover. 1...2...3.
Titus: Wow it's all over?
Constantine: John Doe had the ageing Petrol's name from day one. There is literally no one who can stop him!
Click for Spoiler:
The crowd goes absolutely nuts as the music for the WZCW champion hits.
Titus: YES IT'S MR BALLER. THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER!
Harrys: Ladies and Gentlemen please welcome the WZCW champion Mr Baller!
The crowd pop once again as Mr Baller has the biggest smile we've ever seen in WZCW history, he has a bag in one hand, a mic in the other and the belt around his waist.
Constantine: Just to remember that Baller is the champion after being given the belt by Jared.
Baller: John Doe, you truly are a formidable opponent. How about we settle this in the ring for the WZCW Championship?
John Doe: I accept, you are nothing but a scrawny excuse of a man!
Well it was about that time that Mr Baller made his way to the ring. He opened the bag and inside was a glowing black Basketball. He put his hand on it and grew to about 10 foot tall and became a monster, kind of like in Space Jam. OK exactly like in Space Jam.
Titus: This should be nice and easy for Baller.
Again the lights go off.........POW BOOM BANG WANG WHALLOP SOCK FIZZOOP
The lights come on again, Baller is also Duct taped to the mat, lay next to Petrol. John Doe casually goes for the pin...1...2...3.
Harrys: The winner of this match and NEW WZCW World Champion JOHN DOE!
Titus: Good grief!
Constantine: “What kind of world do we live in where the World Champion has no head or arms!”
Harrys: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!
Nemesis walks out to the top of the entrance ramp and stops to peer out at the booing crowd. He places his hands on his hips and cackles evilly before surrounding himself with his cape. He walks down the ramp and slides into the ring before removing his cape and laughing once more.
Harrys: Introducing first, Nemesis!
Constantine: Now here's a man that I can relate to, well other than living in a basement that is.
Titus: No you're pretty spot on there Constantine, I'm sure your mom doesn't mind you staying with her.
Masked Knight rides out on his motorcycle to the top of the ramp, the crowd going berserk. He drives down and jumps off the bike and rolls into the center of the ring, staring down Nemesis as the ref tries to break them apart.
Harrys: And his opponent, The Masked Knight!
Titus: A true crusader for justice!
Constantine: How ridiculous is his outfit? I mean I haven't seen a worse looking super hero since Red Mask.
The ref signals for the bell and immediately the two break out into a Bruce Lee inspired Kung Fu fight. Masked Knight gets a few strikes in before a palm thrust strike sends Knight careening into the entrance stage. Nemesis jumps up to the top rope and flies off with a homing missile kick. He connects just as Knight stands up, sending him backwards. Nemesis quickly pounces and grabs Knight, throwing him clear across the arena back into the ring.
Titus: Where did Nemesis get that kind of strength?
Constantine: Does it matter? He's tossing that masked chump like a rag doll.
Knight is slow to his feet as Nemesis lands on the top turnbuckle. Knight turns around and Nemesis flips off the top rope, but eats a spinning kick right to the gut. Nemesis doubles over in pain on the mat as Masked Knight lines up a chop right to the neck. Nemesis catches Knight's hand and begins swinging him around. He lets go and Knight flies right into the ring post, completely breaking it as the ropes collapse as well. Nemesis is back up and grabs Knight by the neck and holds him high into the air as the crowd begins booing loudly. He jumps out of the ring and slams Knight right through the announce table, completely obliterating the table. Titus and Constantine shield themselves as a random explosion takes place between the ring and the table.
Constantine: What in the hell is this?
Titus: Apparently the source of Nemesis' powers.
Click for Spoiler:
The demonic looking figure appears from out of the explosion as Nemesis turns towards him and kneels down. The figure nods to Nemesis before they both pick up Masked Knight and begin beating him down. The crowd boos until Knight turns it around and sends Nemesis flying directly into the demon. He grabs a hold of the Lord Zedd look alike and sends him head first into the remaining ring post. He suddenly begins striking him with chops that can barely be caught on film before smashing his palm right into the forehead. The Zedd look alike collapses, knocked out. Knight turns towards Nemesis and hits a homing kick of his own, sending Nemesis high into the rafters. Knight jumps up to a turnbuckle and bounces off, flying up into the rafters himself. He catches one of the rails and begins pulling himself up when Nemesis stomps directly on his fingers, causing Knight to drop. He catches hold of the bottom rail and tries pulling himself up again. Nemesis taunts him until suddenly Knight flips up over the rail and hits the Ryder Kick sending Nemesis careening off the rafters and down to the ring below! Nemesis crashes through the mat and down to the floor as Knight drops down and lands on a turnbuckle, the crowd cheering loudly.
Titus: I don't think I've ever seen that in a wrestling match before!
Constantine: This is a wrestling match? These are just two freaks battling it out for our entertainment. I feel like a kid watching cartoons on Saturday mornings again.
Nemesis slowly drags himself out from the bottom of the ring. The Zedd look a like slowly stirs as well and throws his arm towards Nemesis, a red energy emitting from his hand. The energy hits Nemesis and he suddenly begins to grow in size and he busts through the top of the arena. Fans begin spilling out screaming as Knight looks up at the now gigantic Nemesis. Masked Knight does some flashy theatrics and suddenly a gigantic white and black mech flies down from the sky and lands directly in front of Nemesis. Knight jumps into the mech and the two immediately begin brawling, sparks flying every as punches and kicks connect. Knight's mech gains advantage, before pulling out a BIG ASS MOTHERFUCKING PLASMA RIFLE and aims it towards Nemesis. The rifle charges up and shoots what should be a killing shot but Nemesis rolls under and kicks the mech high into the atmosphere as Nemesis jumps up, spinning and flipping around before wrapping his arms around the neck of the mech and drags it all the way to the ground, dropping it face first with the Black Heart Cutter! The mech's head is crushed as Nemesis lies on top of the mech and a referee counts the 3 on the street.
Harrys: Here is your winner, Nemesis!
Titus: This is insane! The whole downtown area has been destroyed by this battle.
Constantine: Yes! The Masked Idiot has fallen! Evil has taken over!
Nemesis gets up and begins celebrating, stomping and destroying building around him as Masked Knight's mech lies in a crater, completely crushed.
Constantine: Well Mr. Superhero, why don't you go save the day? Titus?
The camera turns towards the seat previously occupied by Titus with a briefcase sitting there with the label "Red Mask" stamped across it.
Constantine: It looks like Red Mask is going to get his ass kicked, so for all of us in WZCW, thank you joining us for WZCW All Stars, I'm your future World Heavyweight Champion John Constantine, signing off.
The camera pans out as various superhero knock offs and Red Mask begin flooding in towards the scene of the disaster as Nemesis battles them off as we go off the air.
Who wrote what:
Grand Mystique vs Broski Smith (Bowen)
Erik vs S.H.I.T. vs Saboteur vs Mr That Guy (Funkay)
Petrol vs John Doe (Lee)
Japan vs Sandy Deserts (Numbers)
Blayto and Triple O G vs William Teach and Jared (Lee)
Colby Congo vs Kaster (Numbers)
Action Saxton vs Jax Sax (Funkay)
Masked Knight vs Nemesis (Ty)
Rep/love to them both as it was a pleasure to work with them and everyone who was involved in this.
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