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Old 03-09-2017, 09:19 PM
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Default Constructive Criticism needed

After doing my reviews for a little over 2 months and branching off into Video Games as well I'm wondering what everyone thinks of my reviewing style.

I'm not a professional by any means just a guy with an opinion who loves to write his reviews so I'm sure there are there are things i can improve.

^Dave's work^
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Old 03-10-2017, 02:47 AM
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I read through some, and something that was a consistent thought was how personal it felt reading. Of course it is your review and own unique experience, but I feel it hinders the message you're trying to convey. It's vulnerable in a sense and in general I have had readers find fault in me with that. Early on I had been reviewing music and had been criticized of similar. The thing is it's not really a problem and more of a mistake on capitalizing on your strengths.

A clear straightforward review does work, but I feel like as we've moved further into the internet age we need that personality. You're there, but I feel more like I am hearing a story from a guy in a checkout line. It's interesting and maybe even a topic I would be interested in, but there is no real connection there except that loose basis. I think that's an area your writing suffers from in one way or another.

I think the format especially used in the Game reviews had made the flaws more transparent. You had posted or stated about how you're not an artist so you wouldn't know how to judge it, but that's also an advantage if you choose to think that way. I review music from a fan perspective despite being a collector and at one point musician. I had quit playing due to its destruction of the most consistent passion I have had in my entire life. Your vision isn't biased in a sense that will cripple your opinion and your a fan writing as a fan, often for current or potential fans.

Now on a more direct end I feel like the layout is there and not the explanation as to why. I feel like you a Wrestler cutting a good promo, but you're kind of just sitting at home more curious as to why he's even saying it than the point or performance. It almost comes off as black and white on an end, but it was intended to be a vivid portrait. There's a reason, and a pretty direct reason why you feel this way or can compare it to X or Y even. Yet there isn't some insight as to how this is better or it captures a certain element the other didn't. The Segway into these thoughts seem to hurt them and deconstruct the whole rather than evolve it.

I think the format is fine, and allows you to have consistent elements while having unique text. So the familiarity is established and that's always a good thing. I think I noticed an explanation for why you had written something a certain way or were at a lack of words. We do get there and it's not a one time problem. However I'd try playing off of that or telling a personal note as to how the piece of media made you feel in a way that someone else can read and really believe it ensnared you in itself. This way you would have expressed, solidified the point further, and given a point of emotional connection.

We have the point so now give us a reason to care. You believe in what you're saying, but in a sea of opinions I swim through daily why should I. I want to agree with you and if I don't I want to see you at least gave me insight to why. You're all there, and I know it. The only thing is that there's an entire list of people I already gravitate towards.

I think all of the fatal flaws that could polish your writing and style reside in that spectrum. It does feel human, but in a way that doesn't benefit it. I think through repetition and just reading over your work as you write will shape it for the best. It's a fine balance to really to achieve and I think in the end people just end up working with or adjusting their style to fit a more fabricated product. You by no means have to settle, but trying to alternate your writing consistently with small tweaks will help you note where you stand on things. You're fine on the general idea, and it wasn't painful to read or anything. I just feel like if someone were to even enjoy it they would lack reason to subscribe to your words.

That's just how I saw it. I do like the general format and what you're trying to get at. I don't feel it's bad, or even forgettable. I think it establishes a platform and doesn't build off of it or give me a reason as to why I'd want to read more from you. If there's one more piece of suggestion I'd encourage you to commit more in the sense of you not being wrong. As if someone were to debate this with you and they're backing a piece of media you may not even be familiar with. If I was reading content of quality Id want to suspend my critical thinking and imagine you being able to break points of criticism or provide insight as to why you feel that way. You can flip almost anything into a positive light or negative with enough manipulation. I want the wording to lead to the end thought and I want to feel the pinch of that final line. Then I think back, and the insight provided just make the punch more real to me.

The mind is powerful and think about it like wrestling. We know it's a work and sometimes we get a glimpse of the shoot or real. Yet out of that partial context our passion for the sport allows us to create our own content. Then if you take that context and explain it in a conveying manner another fan can comment because they thought similar. So try to shed some light even if it is shedding light only to yourself. It expands your horizons and allows your mind to be open. With more openness you have more knowledge and can help justify a and sharpen an even greater weapon. That weapon is being selective and closed with your thoughts, but it's much more deadly with reference, experience, context, and it being real.

Best of luck~ be sure to keep at it <3 ^_^
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