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  #11  
Old 02-16-2018, 07:31 PM
Remix's Avatar
Remix Remix is offline
Is a thin rope
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Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...
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I feel the need to add DDT to the pile of things to watch. Japanese indie where Kenny Omega and Kota Ibushi came from.
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  #12  
Old 02-16-2018, 08:31 PM
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Hard Hit Prince suggested DDT already. Not going to lie, on reputation alone that and Progress are the ones I look forward to the most.
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  #13  
Old 02-16-2018, 09:44 PM
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Remix Remix is offline
Is a thin rope
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Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...Remix is getting some looks on Smackdown...
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I'd say not progress for no other reason than the entire fucking Britwres scene needs to be doused in petrol and torched right now. By which I mean it's full of pedophiles and rapists.

Progress is no exception, seeing as they book Strangler Davis on a regular basis.
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  #14  
Old 02-18-2018, 05:20 PM
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Default Hoodslam via Twitch



Hoodslam: This Is Real

Stoner U Presents Ultimate Alliance (Running Time: 2 hrs 27 mins)



Current Roster (via Cagematch)
Click for Spoiler:

Anton Voorhees
Bat Manuel
Berkeley Brawler
Big B
Brittany Wonder
CAUTION
Cereal Man
Drugz Bunny
Ean Hancement
El Chupacabra
Funny Bone
Johnny Butabi
Ken
Manny Faberino
PONG
Richard Shhhnary
Rob Hands
Ryu
Scott Rick Stoner
Shotzi Blackheart
Virgil Flynn III
Zangief
Anthony Butabi
Coach Nuggs
Doc Atrocity
FONG
Gregory Iron
James C
Jean Pierre
Joey Nuggs
Katarina Leigh
Laura James
Nurse Ratchet
Paul London
Steven Tresario
Super Beast



Current Champions
Click for Spoiler:

The Golden Gig Champion: PONG

Intergalactic Tag Team Champions: The CAUTION (Anton Voorhees & Ean Hancement)


Other Accomplishments

The Best Athlete in the East Bay: Cereal Man

The Dixie Carter Memorial Lethal Lottery Battle Bowl Tag Team Tournament Trophy: Ken (w/Stoney Montana)




Cold open to a static shot of the ring and the crowd. Somebody is welcoming the audience to the show, but since it's on Twitch and it's live it is sorta muffled. This set is everything you'd expect from an underground event: seedy venue with graffiti adorning the walls. Plenty of cigarette/weed smoke from attendees. Sloppy ring with a canvas that seems made of cut up garbage bags with the center all duct taped. After ROW and CWFH, this is a refreshing change. Guy brings out another guy (it being live, and their equipment being one step above cups on a string, I'm surprised I could understand anything they said). His music is the theme to the forgotten 80s TV sitcom Perfect Strangers, a lovely upbeat rock ballad. He tells everybody it's fucking good to be back home in Oakland, California. The two have a drink and a chaser before starting the show properly. If anybody has a question, raise their hands. So a few did. One asks what kind of weed Perfect Strangers likes. Silver Planet I think he says. This is clearly what would happen if Cheech and Chong had a wrestling show. Few more bits of Q&A that doesn't really add anything but does tell me that this is not going to be a serious ordeal. I expect a laid back "get high" kind of thing here, and I'd toke to get more out of this, but I'm dry so...

Auctioning a few books for $1. One is about cats. This is by far the weirdest start to a show I've seen, but it's amusing. Gets bumped to $3...$4...FIVE DOLLARS?!? Sold to a man in a nice leather jacket.

Match begins by introducing a referee first. He's wearing a green and black striped shirt. Aight the refs here have some personality. Cool.



Coach Joey Nuggz vs. Richard Shhhnary

Coach comes out with a "I'm a Nuggs Guy" t-shirt (Paul Heyman Guy parody?) and literally has a discussion with commentary while he's in the ring. Coach has this aging pothead thing going for him while Richard is a librarian, complete with a strap of books, even shushing fans. Commentary is audibly heard throughout the arena, opposite of what modern mainstream promotions do. Oh shit Shhhnary hits Coach in the head with one of his books...he's down and the ref is counting the pin...he's up at two. So one thing is for certain: this wrestling isn't an athletic endeavor. It's more performance art than it is a combative sport. This made the Studd vs. Tempo match from ROW look like an NXT main event, is what I'm getting at here. Referee doesn't call for a disqualification but did go for a ring count when they went to the outside. Coach Nuggs uses Shhhnary's stack of books by positioning them near the fallen Shhhnary, stepping on them and somehow using them as leverage for a diving elbow drop that ends the match. This would have been the absolute shittiest thing I've seen if it weren't for how commentary and the crowd were treating it like such a dangerous stunt. Gotta give them credit, I laughed way harder than I should have for this.

Commentary is running down a list of various tag team match types (6-man, etc) and says this year they're going to focus on tag team wrestling. Okay then.



Stoner Brothers Segment

Commentary Guy wants to bring out his brother Rickie to the ring because there was an incident at the last show Stonerversity. I think I'm figuring this all out. Guy at commentary is Scott Rick Stoner and his brother is Rick Scott Stoner (these names are great). They're identical twins. They ask Big B to come out as well, and he does to a cool Ozzy(?) song. He's wearing one of those black faceless ghost reaper-like masks. He rips it off to get the crowd amped, though it does so with minimal effect. He's clearly on something. Stoner Bros also ask for Stevie T (Steven Tresario) who has some sweet trap music and a banded up goatee. The Brothers give fans some backstory - 4 years ago they set the two up as a tag team, and they've done well. Their names are on some whiteboard but they're going to get bumped because they've graduated. They're given Stoner Letterman jackets, and it's exactly what you're imagining. They chant in unison, and strike a "raise the roof" pose. There's a shaking of hands and the Brothers leave. Stevie T & Big B are about to as well but "Tainted Love" by Marilyn Manson plays. "That Handsome Devil" Riv and Junk Yard Cat come out . Riv is oozing charisma - practically pole dancing on the ring post as he gets in the ring. They want a fight. "Your accent changed three times in that promo!" - Stevie T.



"That Handsome Devil" Anthony Rivera & "Junk Yard Cat" Joey Smokes vs. Hayward Heat

The referee this match has an orange vest on because he's here for community service. Chuckled in spite of myself. Silly exchange between Big B and Riv: "I AM BIG B!" "WELL I AM BIG D!" "I DON"T CARE FOR YOU, BIG D!" Riv chews up the scenery unlike any wrestler I've ever seen, doing the most extra provocative taunts imaginable. One funny spot was Riv trying to make the tag...to Stevie T. Welcome To Hayward - tag team finisher is some weird Gutwrench + Cutter combo on The JYC is good for 3 as Big B & Stevie T are the winners. Way more athletic than I was led to believe with the show's opener, but probably way too many tags being made to stay completely interested. Standouts were Anthony Rivera and Stevie T for sure. I'll be damned...Booker T's theme music is played as they celebrate.


Commentary shoot the shit til announcing Picture Time!!!



Coach Nuggz Is Back In The Ring For Picture Time!!!

He takes pictures for the fans. What did you expect for Picture Time?



Manny Faberino Comes To The Ring

Manny comes out to "Seventeen" by Winger. Manny is billed at 17 years old and living at his Mother's House. Has this intriguing "I'm my mom's favorite wrestler" gimmick about him and I dig it. He takes a moment of silence for his savior, Guy Fieri. There's even a fucking ringbell going off for this segment despite Fieri being alive. Poor taste, but eh it's what you'd expect in this place. He wore a cowboy hat to the ring (got a Tremors chant), and told the crowd he was supposed to face Cowboy Sam Owens, but it's not going to happen. "We were going to have a duel, and I was gonna shoot him, and he was gonna die, and then I was gonna say Bury Me With My Money, and two people were gonna laugh, just like they did just now..." Funny stuff.

He admits he's there to kill time...but Cowboy Sam Owens's music hits. He doesn't come out, but Manny dances along, getting a "DAN-CING" chant (you'll never get that in any of the dozen Dance-Offs WWE does). New music plays and it's an old Russian diddy. Manny does this hybrid Texas Two-Step followed by the Can-can and now I know I'm staring into another universe. "Holy shit!" chants. He goes to do a flip, lands directly on his head, and he sells the pain. I'm adding that to the Flippy Counter anyways. It gets blamed on Charlie Chaplin, an invisible entity in Hoodslam. "Charlie Chaplin" chants makes me wonder if I did hit a joint before watching this, and I just can't remember. Anyways the green striped referee is there wearing the cowboy hat, checking both Manny and Charlie for foreign objects to start the match.



Manny Faberino vs. Charlie Chaplin

"I'm only 17 and you're like 200!" Crowd starts clapping in unison, and by some divine decree this match has changed to a Dance-Off. A man is dancing off with nobody there. Camera sells the ghost by jerking side to side, up and down erratically. The crowd is eating this up, with another chant "Charlie's Dancing!" Manny is jealous and lashes out with a Cutter, and pins him..for a two. "You Got Served!" chants now. "Wanna see somebody get served?" Manny does Scotty 2 Hotty's The Worm, Charlie strikes. Commentary does A HELL OF A JOB selling all the rapid fire reversals, missed clotheslines, etc. Camera sells Charlie Chaplin dive to Manny "I hope he doesn't dive on me!". "You sick fuck!" chants for Chaplin. Both Charlie and Manny to the top rope..and Many executes a Superplex to the outside, his back hitting the ring apron loudly. "What the fuck!" chants. Double Count Out to end the match.

Fight continues to the parking lot, and the fans follow. Manny climbs a big rig and throws Charlie Chaplin off. Crowd is unglued. Manny is downright remorseful acting like he just killed him. He looks visibly sick, and high tails it back inside and through the curtain. Charlie Chaplin is on an invisible stretcher with an invisible ambulance (crowd makes Weeooo Weeooo noises) but He's Back Up!!! Gets a round of applause. This was...a lot. A lot of fun? A lot of cringe? Yes.


Rob Hands & "The SideShow" Joe Killmeister vs. "The Master" Ken & Victor von Richter

Rob is ripping off Psycho Sid, complete with music, attire, and mannerisms. Joe is a bearded clown. Ken is Ken from Street Fighter and Victor is a DBZ fighter, complete with scouter. Court-appointed referee has returned. Killmeister stepped completely on top of Ken and gave him an elbow drop + pin and I don't recall seeing that combination. He also has a creepy clown laugh, so bonus points there. Rob Hands sold an invisible "Fireball Ki" from Victor. Victor also gave a good Spear to Hands, followed by a Jackhammer. Killmeister with a Double-Armed DDT, commentary referencing Cactus Jack. Samoan Drop to Rob Hands ends the match with Ken holding Victor down onto mini-Sid for the win.

This time is probably as good as any to point out nobody is a face or a heel on this show. They're just doing their thing. No story, or minimal at best. Just characters. Admirable, but I'm not into the guys nearly as much knowing that.

More shooting the shit, referencing Bill Nye getting high. They have no idea what the next match is, but they'll wait for the music to hit. It's Tony (???).


This Guy Has No Tag Team Partner

So somebody named Tony, Joey, whatever gets on the mic to tell the crowd he was ready to fight tonight but he has no tag team partner. Sort of the same setup they did with Rob Hands not knowing who he was teaming with, but this way is a bit more of a mystery. "Everybody in the fucking back already paired up." Says he'll be back March 15th in gear, inviting somebody to team with him. Says he doesn't want a loser though. Leaves. This felt like a colossal waste of time, getting no reaction from the crowd.

Commentary tries to get the fans interested by asking them if they're all high yet. They're quite awake, raising what looks like blunts and the like. This show is a trainwreck. Anyways, on to the next tag team match.



The Deacon Barista & The Berkeley Brawler vs. Boyz N The Hood & Big Baby Powder

Hey green/black striped ref is back and holy hell Barista is a Starbucks employee equipped with a thermos. He came out to a slow acoustic version of Saliva's "I Walk Alone". Berkeley Brawler looks like a caricature of an Upper Class white classic hipster complete with scooter, glasses, and manbun (ehh I'll put him higher than ROW's Startek but way, way lower than CWFH's Bateman). Truly a marvel. Sings along to his music in a Pee Wee Hermanlike way. Barista sings with him long after the song is cut. Hood is a gangsta type with a mask and Baby Powder looks like a sleazy Vegas manager pimp hybrid...who is shilling baby powder. They come out to a remix of the COPS theme. Berkeley & Barista have matching cummerbunds (a sash) and they raise it up in the air like they're tag team titles. So apparently the cummerbunds are on the line now, the commentary says. Ref wears Bruce's bling. Oh, Big Baby Powder's last name is Johnson, as in Johnson & Johnson, lol. Barista to do a Barista Bomb...but needs help from Berkeley. Berkeley Brawler puts Baby Powder into a sitting STF move called The Brawlerer and gets the submission win.

Commentary talks about Hayward Heat doing well against Junk Yard Cat & Riv. They're just going over who won the previous matches. I assume they do this because the fans are all kinds of fucked up and probably forgot. More shooting the shit, which is fine because 1. This place can't afford backstage segments I guess and 2. Interactive. Fans like it.



Main Event: The CAUTION vs. The Squad: Hip Hop Harry, D-Rogue, and Kenny K

I wish I knew what the ref did to be doing community service. If commentary told me, they did so with alcohol in their mouths. Here is a very strange ensemble of cats, Anton Voorhees and Ean Hancement aka The CAUTION. They carry around a giant plastic trophy and have a "valet" with them, Khan, a guy dressed as Britney Spears in her flight attendant costume (and he's killing it, to be honest). He rips his clothes off and is in somekind of semi-nude glittery bodysuit ensemble and this is the loudest reaction so far. They all dance and commentary talks about how these are his life decisions, motherfucker so take it how you want. Sorta progressive for a show I totally expect tits to pop out at. The Squad are thugs but not exactly gangstas, and they're getting in people's faces and flipping them off. Commentary did a shit job here saying their names, pretending they're Bruce Buffer with stressing syllables. Your audio is an abortion guys, please keep in mind you're streaming on Twitch.

The Squad jump The CAUTION to start. Looks like the flippy counter is going to get a workout because there are already 4 flips in the first minute of this match (yet somehow they don't come off as athletic, weird). Bunch of Superkicks and I'm finally seeing the indy that gets a bad rep. Oh Hip Hop Harry has a Zack Gowen thing going for him, and I'll let you guess what I mean by that. The CAUTION have a cool spot where they grab hold of one guy and "Britney" gets on top of him to strike a pose ("It's Britney, Bitch!"). Series of elbows by The CAUTION and the ref has no idea how to handle this match so they're just doing their thing. (Side note: Twitch has a chatroom, and one of the guys stated that Hip Hop Harry won a Battle Royal in this fed due not being able to be eliminated...I shouldn't laugh, but I am.) D-Rogue ...he looks like Manny Faberino...actually I'm sure he is but he's wearing a hoodie..I can see how this could be a jab at wrestlers with alter egos.

Nice rollup spot where individual break the cover by rolling one guy over, making the pin change for the opponent. A ball of humanity. D-Rogue Manny rolled Ean Hancement up in a backslide pin for the win though I'm not even sure he was the legal man. The CAUTION lost their trophy cup though it was never up for grabs.

Britney is asked to sing. Said he didn't know they had a title. It was just a prop. Says they'll be back on top next time and now for some singing. Antony takes the mic. "Please sing, Ean!" chants. Ean will sing...wait no. He's too upset "He's lost his smile!" and walks out. Kinda kills the mood as the other two walk out right after. Weird note to end on, but commentary cracks jokes and makes it a bit better. They plug their program which was a fantastic idea for something this underground.

Ends with Perfect Strangers theme playing.






First Impressions

Venue: Now we're seeing something different. Looked like some kind of warehouse, with chickenwire behind the commentary team showing a few wrestlers waiting in the wing, the ring composed of garbage bags and duct tape. Art on the walls is mostly video game logos and references. Standing room only, with dead arcade machines and various boxes strewn around. Cannabis flag acted as curtains in a doorway for the wrestlers to enter/exit. Eh, this place has its own identity.

Crowd: Alive. They were definitely into this show, chanting on the guys they liked and booing appropriately for the ones that aren't meant to be liked. Say what you will for how awful hardcore wrestling is, but its fans don't need a beach ball to be entertained. They were drinking, toking, what else have you. Not a large crowd (fifty people at most), and not necessarily a rowdy one, but vocal enough for me to want to join them. There were no barriers between them and the performers.

Wrestling: It was abysmal, but everybody including the wrestlers were in on how bad this was, so how the hell can I judge something this self-aware?

Characters: Even the referees were characters here. Standouts for me were Manny Faberino, Anthony Riviera, Joe Killmeister, and The Deacon Barista. Place was packed with colorful characters, to be honest.

Production: Two cameras were present- one held by a guy near the ring, a little shakily, and the other static bit farther from the action. The music from the "wrestlers" were songs people have heard before, glad to see some familiarity. Lighting was horrendously blinding in some parts, making the more Caucasian wrestlers look like the ghost of Sheamus. Audio was the worst part, it being in a small building with commentary muttering through microphones. I think they did a stellar job killing time between segments and matches without commercials, but still wasn't their best feature.


Flippy Counter: 10


If you're a traditionalist, leave Hoodslam alone. It's tongue-in-cheek humor, poking fun at wrestling while being a wrestling show. It's for adults who are into weed culture and video game characters. Surprisingly, I didn't really get an old-school ECW feel for this program. There was barely anything hardcore in it, and nobody bled. Tits did not come out, and neither were there any women there to be eye candy or moan through a match. Worst it got was Fuck Bombs. They do have Katarina Leigh aka Katie Lee Burchill aka Winter on their roster, and I'd be lying if I wasn't curious to what her role is in this place. All in all, I did have fun watching this. It's not a serious program. Expect the worst wrestling imaginable, so bad that the people doing it know its bad. But it was entertaining for a stoner show. I think this was a B event, and there are bigger events than this scheduled, so will I journey back to this weird universe? Not sure. We'll see.



Up Next: The West Coast Wrestling Connection
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  #15  
Old 02-19-2018, 01:09 AM
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The Phenomenal Matrix The Phenomenal Matrix is offline
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I don't know if it would perk your interest, but I've seen a lot on twitter about WrestleCircus and how good it is. I myself have never watched it but I know it's streamed on twitch. Will send you the link if you want/need it, I plan to check it out myself soon.
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  #16  
Old 02-19-2018, 04:50 AM
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I'm loving these and was laughing throughout the hoodslam review.

The Deacon Barista sounds great ��
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  #17  
Old 02-19-2018, 06:15 PM
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I'm loving this too! Great thread Spidey. I confess, I've never heard of Hoodslam, but I just loved it.
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  #18  
Old 02-19-2018, 06:25 PM
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Drugz Bunny and Cereal Man? Lool
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  #19  
Old 02-20-2018, 02:03 PM
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Glad you guys are getting a kick out of this. I didn't think I'd enjoy doing this sort of thing at first, being completely new to independent stuff. But so far for better or worse it's been a good experiment.

I was 1/3 done with The WCWC but then they uploaded a new episode on Youtube. So this is as good as time as any: In case any of you haven't caught on yet, I am reviewing the most current episodes/shows that I can find.
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  #20  
Old 02-22-2018, 12:36 AM
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Spidey Spidey is offline
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Default WCWC on PDX-TV




West Coast Wrestling Connection

Episode 194 (Running Time: 58:35)


Current Champions via their webpage:
Click for Spoiler:

WCWC Pacific Northwest Champion: Jeff Bloom

WCWC Legacy Champion: Mikey O'Shea

WCWC Tag Team Champions: The Bonu$ Boyz (Clutch & Sugar Brown)

WCWC Oregon Championship: VACANT

WCWC Oregon Tag Team Champions: 4 Minutes of Heat (Ricky Gibson & Eddie Pearl)


Defunct Championships:

WCWC Lightning Division Championship: Eric Right




Current Roster:
Click for Spoiler:

Adrian Matthews
Alexander Hammerstone
Anthony Greene
Beast The Butcher
Caleb Konley
Cameron Cole
Clutch
Damien Drake
Dan Joseph
Darin Corbin
Dicky Mayer
Dillon Divine
Ethan HD
Gangrel
Grappler 3
Jacob Austin Young
Jeremy Blanchard
Joey Ryan
Kassius Koonz
Marcus Malone
Matt Striker
Matt XStatic
Mike Camden
Mikey O'Shea
Morty Lipschitz
Mr. Tubb
Richard Syncyr
"Rock God" Ricky Gibson
Stone Hendrix
Suede Thompson
Sugar Brown
The Grappler
Wes Brisco





Title card featuring, well, the title (WCWC), episode, air date, AFD flag, and the station it's on, which is KPDX. Hurt my wrist with how much of a throwback this is. Logo spins out and we are welcomed by a host (didn't give a name) in a green screen'd control room while mute video footage "plays" from over his shoulder. An instrumental of Muse's "Uprising" is also playing as he speaks. Tells us last week they saw The Bonu$ Boyz defend their titles again and Dicky Mayer went the distance with Ethan HD in a Time Limit Draw. Wow. Don't see that these days. They shake hands. The big time main event also saw Dante's Rejects (Gangrel, Beast the Butcher, Stone Hendrix, & Lucy) vs. Matt Striker who found partners Alexander Hammerstone & Jeff Bloom. The team of former Northwest Champions defeated the goths. This Week: Matt Striker vs. Wrecking Crew member Mike Camden. Also last week an ongoing feud between Eric Right, Richard Syncyr, and Damien Drake continued and clip shows it was an all-out backstage brawl complete with Drake getting stomped in the locker room. Mikey O'Shea came to Drake's aid. This Week: O'Shea defends his title against Darin Corbin.

Alright two things here: this lasted less than two minutes, and was super rapid fire. I had to pause several times to understand who was doing what. I like that the show wasted no time updating the fans on what is going on in WCWC, but this was way too quick. I don't feel like it was the host's fault though, whoever he is.

We get a full-screen opening video of various wrestlers fighting in the ring set to Muse's "Uprising". A translucent "West Coast Wrestling Connection" scrolls down diagonally. Impressive quality.

Richard Syncyr and Eric Right head into a locker room. Syncyr sits down and opens up his rolling luggage. Everything goes to black and Eric shouts,"Richard, what was that?" Lights come back on and Drake's Robinesque mask is on top of dude's luggage. Scene goes dark again and now Drake is standing behind Eric with his hair in his face and hoodie up. Eric is all WTF but lights go back out again and Drake is gone. Eric laughs, crumples up the mask, and says "The fly dances in the spider's web". This was a silly supernatural segment, but the line was cool albeit cliche and the delivery was a-ok. It'll take getting used to but I could enjoy a less-than-normal wrestling show here.



Marcus Malone & Julian Whyt vs. The Fit Club

Malone and Whyt's theme, "September" by Earth, Wind, and Fire, is the thing of dreams (side note: Marcus Malone was the guy in that pic with Chris Bay I used for CWFH). Malone & Whyt have matching rainbow tights. Dillon Divine & Matt XStatic are Fit Club and everybody here got the jobbers' entrance of being in the ring already. Blake Chadwick and Christian Cole are the commentary team and they're here with Darin Corbin as a guest. The story, if you want to call it a story, is that The Fit Club is looking to one day fight the Tag Team Champions (which every fucking team should want to) and Malone & Whyt are a new upstart team ready to make a name for themselves. There are a shitload of arm holds in this match. Whyt did a standing Shooting Star Press and dude looks little heavy so I was surprised there. Great double team action leads us to A FUCKING COMMERCIAL BREAK the moment it gets interesting. I guess they have an old-school mentality here for telling a story, and taking a break right when there's progress to make it more exciting. Not a fan, not for an opening match.

Commercial has Morty Lipschitz with Adrian, seeming like they're shooting a promo...and some masked guy with a cape, plaid jacket and wrestling singlet is making weird noises and talking to some shrubbery that has eyes and a mouth. He comes over where the two are and roasts Morty about how that wasn't an interview (this is followed by a series of donuts, I guess to mimic subtitles). Poppy Gato (?) takes over the interview. Tells him what all Voodoo Doughnut provides, like it's open 24 hours, does weddings, etc. Morty and Adrian talk to themselves after that and there's the Poppy Gatto whatever guy on top of the building screaming about Voodoo Doughnuts being open right now. This was the dumbest goddamn thing I've seen wrestlers do outside the ring. This hurt, and it's gonna hurt for a minute.

Oh hey we get another Voodoo Doughnuts commercial. The Grappler asks for a burger, gets one but the buns are doughnuts because of course they are. He eats it in the most comical, unfunniest way (audio is screwy with guy talking again though he's clearly ravishing the burger) and he slaps money in the tip jar telling us how that was the best burger he ever had. Papi Gotto dudebrother says it's the Voodoo Maple Burger with Bacon and it's only around for a short time at Brunch Box. Wait, this wasn't Voodoo Doughnuts or is it??? Remember those Ren & Stimpy cartoons with the wacky sound effects and royalty free classical music? These commercials have that and that sort of vibe but it's just not good. This hurt, and it's gonna hurt all day.

Thank GOD we are back to the match. Marcus gets a hot tag and is pretty exciting, a superkick here, a splash here, a splash there, commentary giving him the rub by saying this was "Shades of his grandson, Carl Marlone!" (???) A quick Divine Shine, some lift-into a sit-out slam, by Dillon Divine ends this match. We get to here their theme, "She's A Maniac" by Flashdance. Divine gets into the face of a grizzled older fan, and I'm fairly sure that fan could have kicked the shit out of him if this were for real. Commentary, while not awful, were not as exciting as previous commentary teams have been for these independent wrestling reviews. In fact I'd say they were pretty boring, and what makes it worse is that they had a guest, Darin Corbin, a contender for the Legacy title, there with them and he wasn't all that colorful either. Up next: an old rivalry, Alexander Hammerstone vs. "The Gentleman Brawler" Eric Right compete, but first, commercial.



Mikey O'Shea Interview

Wait, no. They said commercial break, but what they meant to say was Mikey O'Shea is backstage with interviewer No Name. (side note: You know, usually we see interviewers who are young, attractive, fits that Millennial mold, etc. This one is a lady who, while still attractive, is up there in years and it's plain to see) Thoughts on first title defense. It took him two years to get it. Darin Corbin walks into camera shot and then interferes with the interview itself. He's eating a doughnut, and gee I wonder where he got it. Darin tells him he'll be the shortest Legacy Champion in "Dub-Cee" history...cuz he will end this reign. "You're eating a Voodoo Doughnut before our match...?" "They're delicious." "...I'm going to beat the ever-loving Hell out of you tonight." Alright admittedly I liked this even with the lame bakery plug they did 3 times in the first 15 minutes of this show. Probably because I'm pretending Mikey just hates Voodoo Doughnuts because it's making everything this show is doing look a little shitty. Whatever. I'm a Mikey O'Shea fan for today.

"Rock God" Ricky Gibson (picture whatever Rocker from the 80s and you've got him down) is here to sell us...pizza. Alright, it's not doughnuts so maybe this won't be- fuuuuucking sonovafuck! He goes up to them to ask for "the usual" followed by "a Combo Supreme". If you know anything about ordering "the usual", then you know why this was mind-boggling. Shots of them making pizza. Ricky WOOOOs and eats his Flying Pie's pizza. Alright, this was nowhere near as bad as Voodoo Doughnuts, but that doesn't make it good or entertaining. I'm getting some Southpaw Regional Wrestling flashbacks, but I'm not chuckling.

Capital Pawn has Marcus Malone in a mute role. He's got this sweet Jimi Hendrix thing going for him, so I assume that's his character in the fed. This is the most subdued commercial featuring a wrestler by far. There's a tag team title and he's looking at jewelry...wait hold on. Is this him pawning a championship? Who green lit this idea? Unintentionally hilarious. Capital Pawn's logo has wings, a crown, and two glocks. I feel I wouldn't be safe going into this place.

Another pizza commerical, but nobody I'd recognize as a wrestler so nothing to really note except two different pizza commercials in the same advertising block. Doughnuts- 2, Pizza- 2.

Beautiful outside shot of the location, Camp Withycombe National Guard Armory.



Last Week: Damian Drake Assaulted

So they played the same video from the start of the show, but now there's audio. Why did the guy have to give us a recap if they were just going to play this same clip again? I hate when shows do this. I get that maybe folks are just now tuning in and need to be brought up to speed but this argument is a dying one with the advent of DVR, Tivo, etc. I did forget to mention Damian is getting pummeled with some billy club looking thing from Eric. "I want to tell you something, I want to tell you something - You are NOT a superhero!" then we get the same clip from before with Damian's mask, black out, Damian, black out, fly dances in spider's web, etc. This is all brought to you by Columbia Hobby. Yeah, we're not getting away from these plugs anytime soon, guys. Strap in.



Eric Right w/Richard Syncyr vs. Hammerstone

Eric Right is in the ring. I suppose I get the need to make some cuts here and there, but I do hate seeing this happen. Walking to the ring is the easiest way to tell viewers what kind of character the wrestlers are. Anyways, at least we get it with Hammerstone, complete with a gif of fiery explosion for the internet. Also time to point out that the music that's blared is obviously not being played in attendance, it is being pumped into the videos for Youtube it appears. Morty Lipschitz at the commentary table. Please please don't get interrupted by the Poppi Donut guy. So Morty's a lawyer and that's as much of a character I've gotten so far. Hammer looks like sorta like Chris Hemsworth in Thor, and even has a little hammer on his tights and yeah it is right there near his personal hammer. Somewhat decent but short "Eric Sucks" chant. Morty, being a lawyer, is asked if Eric Right may be experiencing schizophrenia...yeah think about how incredibly stupid this question is for Morty. He saves this with "I"m not a medical person, but..." So Eric is losing his shit like Hogan lost his shit with seeing Ultimate Warrior in a mirror. Instead of just having Eric think Damian is fucking with him, fans get to see Damian fuck with him, making him not crazy, but commentary treats it like he is seeing things, therefore we are seeing things and we're losing our shit - buy pizza and doughnuts. "Have you seen what he eats? Or who he eats?" "Giggidy". Eric ties Hammerstone up in a Tree of Woe, and mocks putting Drake's mask on. Fans wake up a little. Eric is starting to get a little crazy but Hammerstone quickly ends that by hitting a Valkyrie Missile, a Bicycle Kick. Hammerstone looks at the fallen Eric Right with confusion because Eric got up after a pretty good powerbomb before the finisher. Decent way to sell both men being powerful in their own right.



The Grappler Is Going To Rob A Bank

Quiet cut to a waist-level shot of a man walking up to the doors of what I assume is this building. There is a mask in his jacket pocket. He quietly takes it out, and puts it on. He looks into the camera before walking in. I really liked this scene. No words were needed, just a guy putting on his mask and preparing for what is in store for him. Effective and less than a minute.

Darin Corbin has a golden briefcase and is walking into Columbia Hobby (not that Pawn shop?) all sneaky freaky deaky. Yep, another one of these. He asks the front desk for protection and I wouldn't be surprised if they handed him a pistol and said have a nice day. Front desk gives him two guys in suits, one wearing a blue mask similar to Drake. Darin says "Not that kind of protection", and opens the case. It's a Raichu Pokemon card (I can't even make a joke here) from like the third > generation. "I gotcha covered" and desk man has a freakin sleeve cover. They sell comics, cards, jerseys, other sports memorabilia, etc here. See, to me this a a solid commerical, 100x better than the Voodoo Doughnut abortion. But now I'm confused to whether or not I should hate Darin Corbin because he's obviously a heel and not exactly an interesting one but he's in this and this was interesting and I like interesting. Fuck. Sponsors got me questioning everything when I shouldn't even be looking into them that much. But I'd be a liar if I didn't say these make me hate the wrestlers a little more or a little less.

Brunch Box has tag champs Bonu$ Boyz worked up over Brunch Box and all it can give them/you. They could have it delivered to them at home, work, or "when we huggin' them sleeves" they say in unison. ...that's their catchphrase? The hell does that even mean? Cuts to The Grappler saying it saves them time by not getting in traffic they can focus on business. Aww I was just beginning to like this guy.



"The Champion of Beards" Mike Camden w/Jeremy Blanchard vs. Matt Striker

Striker gets a special blue lights moving around entrance. Matt is still a teacher character complete with weird diamond sweater vest and diamond shorts. Total face high-fiving children and the like. "How Soon Is Now?" by The Smiths is his theme, while Mike got some decent symphonic metal stuff. Also, there are very few people that makes me think "Okay you look like a future world champion" and Mike Camden has it. Like a skinny Chris Hero. Okay we get another moment of a match picking up - this time with Blanchard getting a cheap shot in on Matt and Mike landing a clothesline before another commercial break mid-match.

Same Brunch Box commercial featuring a masked man ordering a doughnut burger. So this is what Hell looks like for wrestling fans. This is going to hurt, and it's going to hurt for eternity.

Capital Pawns with a very normal commercial up til the end where that luchador buys a revolver. Can't even make this up. RIP Paupie Gahto. Oh he also gets what the voiceover says is a Multi-Purpose Weapon. It's a chainsaw. Nothing is real.

Back to the match, which is actually pretty good. The Grappler is at the entrance. Mike Camden rolls Matt Striker up and gets an assistance by Blanchard from the outside to secure the win. Fine ending, as again both men look good in various ways without it being too cheap. Judging by skill and look Camden is somebody I would be pushing up the ranks and Matt Striker is likely their moneymaker. Story is The Grappler was suspended for putting his hands on an official for a few weeks, and decided tonight to return. Grappler is part of The Wrecking Crew with Mike Camden and just helped his boy out. Fans give Matt Striker an "at least you tried" applause. He high-fives everybody and leaves.

Bobby Gotto is back to try and get me to eat the fucking donuts again. Mikey O'Shea is there for no apparent reason but to point at Voodoo Donuts vans and look crazily at Boppy Goddo. I...I think they've cracked me. I swear on my life they're no longer shilling donuts...they're shilling the delivery vans. One is bigger than this one. But this one is even bigger than the other one. They go places around the country. This one has a music stage. "Say Ni Hao to this Taipei, Taiwan model" compact delivery truck. This baby even has a beer option. There might be a model somewhere near you, they tell me. Oh good. I'll be sure to lie in the road as it comes.

"Rock God" repeats his pizza joint commercial. Where's The Grappler with the gun?



Main Event: "Red Hair Don't Care" Darin Corbin vs. "The Irish Juggernaut" Mikey O'Shea for the WCWC Legacy Championship

"Mikey's Gonna Kill You" chants start before the bell. Okay, I realize I haven't been great at describing performers's appearance. Mainly because they generally don't stick out to me, and I figure if any of you are really interested well that's what Google is for. But here it's pretty important to tell you that Mikey O'Shea is a heavyset guy. Not Big Daddy V heavy but Samoa Joe heavy. Darin Corbin is a scrawny Jesse Pinkman-looking gent with a beard. Corbin hits a Ginger Snap aka Cutter right out of the gate. Tries to roll him over immediately for the pin, promising that whole making O'Shea the shortest Legacy Champion. But he kicks out. Irish Car Bomb (1. What a repulsive fucking name piss off and 2. This was Dillon Divine's Divine Shine finisher from the first match) and a cover has Darin kicking out immediately. Commentary sells this as Mikey O'Shea is one of the most popular wrestlers in WCWC and Darin Corbin is the most hated. Camera cut to two people with posters. One says "Cheater" and the other has Darin's face and the word "Loser" on it. The holders looked completely disinterested in the match and one was scrolling through her phone. Fans either jeer "Corbin" or "boring" and I can't tell which. Oh hey the girls with the posters are now holding them up, though the "Cheater" one was flipped over to read "Loser". Commentary reminds viewers O'Shea fought in a Bull Rope Match and may still not be 100%. To give Darin Corbin some credit, his facial expressions are solid.

One moment Darin Corbin dodges O'Shea, making him run into the ring corner. He plays to the audience "I'm SO smart! I'm SO smart!" and get clubbed to the back. A woman at ringside is loosing her shit at this, running through Commentary's vanilla lines with a wayyy too into this smoker's voice of "Oh you're SO smart, how come you done fall..." Still real to her. Darin can't get O'Shea into a Boston Crab, because [insert Scott Steiner voiceover]. The Gunnslinger (no really, Billy Gunn's Swinging Side Slam doesn't even get a fancy rename here) is good for three as Mikey O'Shea retains the title. I'll give him credit - when he climbs the ropes to pose with his Legacy title he does look like a monster. Show ends on this image.







Venue: National Guard Armory's basketball gym. There were white tiles as far as the eye could see, bleachers, and a few rows of chairs for fans to sit. There is an upper level with a gorgeous window view. Again we see no barriers separating fans from the performers. Blue velvet-looking curtains with strobe lights for an entrance/exit. Strobe lights and that metal grid thing that small promotions love putting around the entrance's frame. Black curtains stretch from wall to wall to hide people that are waiting in the wing to come out.

Crowd: Dead. Well, mostly dead. I'm willing to bet the people that did chant and boo felt stupid immediately after they started because they'd always stop abruptly. Every camera shot had these poor souls looking like they were held against their will. Several turned to their phones, being the 20 somethings most of them were, with a handful of older people who were probably vets. Worst crowd I've seen so far. I started to feel the same way they felt by the end of this show though, but the show itself had nothing to do with it.

Wrestling: Every match took the old-school approach to wrestling, and it often came out slow. With like two exceptions, everybody worked the long game. For a modern viewer like myself, it made me sleepy. Probably why the fans weren't fascinated. Wasn't as engaging as a traditional style would have you believe here, but they did do an excellent job in protecting wrestlers for a future big story. If there were some bigger event all this would lead up to, I'd say this was an alright affair.

Characters: The Grappler didn't say a word (away from shit commercials) and really sold me as somebody not to fuck with, which is odd because he had a small grey beard behind the mask and must be pushing 50. Him and Marcus Malone, Matt Striker, and even Darin Corbin had personality, though Corbin's was wasted on commentary as he just wasn't all that into it I bet. A few strike me as some who have a TON of character about them, like Damian Drake, Hammerstone, and Mike Camden, but they weren't utilized. Then again there was only one segment throughout this thing and it was just to plug the donuts.

Production: Commentary were vanilla casual - nothing they said made me interested, even when they called matches. Just a few guys not exactly shooting the shit, but close. Just annoyed me. I could have muted this and probably enjoyed it more. Camerawork was as good as it possibly could get and the only problem I have with them is their lack of uniform...the casual look was distracting and it looked like a few fans just getting shots. Lighting was fine, and they included some of those tall lighting fixtures movie sets tend to use. Audio and video was the best part, and so was music, though like I said before instead of them pumping music from speakers and such like we're accustomed to, it was played for Youtube. I guess for crystal clarity. Their sponsors almost took me completely out of this show, though.


Flippy Counter: 2



The commercials were a bit much, and I'm trying to clear my head on that. It's not entirely fair to judge a show by their endorsements. WWF and WCW did have some horrendous shit back in their day, too. But damn did it happen a lot. This was a casual promotion, nothing ever made me suspect there'd be anything even slightly dangerous going on. Children were in abundance, but weren't a fixture like ROW seemed to have them. This was a local TV wrestling show, and you have to give it some credit for being clear about what it was. For a local thing, it wasn't bad. It does have the old-school thing going for it with flashes of modern sports entertainment, like Drake. Superb video quality. Take it for what it is, and try to skip over the commercials. I couldn't, therefore I am in pain.


Up next: Dramatic Dream Team
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