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Old 02-20-2018, 02:22 PM
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Join Date: Nov 2010
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The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...The Phenomenal Matrix is getting some looks on Smackdown...
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Nothing like the feedback I said I'd give a couple days later than I planned to get it done eh? Anyway here it is.

Spidey/Batti:
I'll start off by saying I didn't get a chance to read your last couple RP's so I could have missed some things that lead up to this RP and if so, my bad. I did enjoy this RP, Batti is one of my favorite characters in the fed and I think you do great work with her, but to me it seemed a little extreme for Ram to assault her, even if it was great that Batti viewed it as her final lesson from him. I know Ram and Batti broke up but I didn't think Ram was the type to react like he did, so I wasn't the biggest fan of the story there. On the fiip side I thought your promo on Eve was great and made the RP. Comparing your showdown with her to Eve vs Celeste from KC last year was a very good comparison and Batti showing some fire in her words was nice to see. I think you would have benefited from having a little bit more in this RP but I do think it was good. As a small note, I didn't know who Ray Webber was, possibly from not having time to read your last couple RP's.

Fallout/Harald:
I'll start by saying this probably won't be helpful feedback as I didn't see anything negative here, but you asked for feedback and I thought I could tell you the things I liked anyway. When I saw your app I was wondering how you would make the character work because truthfully it doesn't sound like there's a lot there to work with, but I'm already interested in seeing more of him after reading your sample RP. I like that he seems like a very intelligent person as it's not often a big man in wrestling has that trait, and the comedic parts made me laugh with Harald being second cousins with PewDiePie and him reading Fifty Shades Darker and not realizing it at first. This was a fine way to introduce your new character and it should be interesting to see a full RP from him. Also I love that he yells release the kraken before hitting his finisher, with that finisher name I'd expect nothing less.

K Web/Logan:
I'll be honest, I don't think this was nearly as good as your last RP. In your last RP, Logan finally stood up for himself and nearly beat down Goldman, so I was a little surprised to see them being somewhat civil here a couple weeks later, but at the same time that shows Goldman is a coward and that works. But you should have had more going on in this RP, my suggestion being showing the accident that you mentioned Brittany having instead of just mentioning it in passing. You also barely mentioned your opponents and that was a downfall to the RP. I know you got crunched for time and might have had more going on here if that didn't happen, but it lead to a disappointing RP. All that said I'm still interested in the story you have going and watching it play out, and I know you can do better than this and will step it up more in the future.
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